It yaks?

If it has diarrhea, you swim for your life.

I'd fire up the grill and make some bison burgers.

when my pet bacon gets sick i eat it.

i mean i get sick when i eat bacon

/no wait i don't
//gay

Prof. Frink: It yaks?

Aaand done.

Well, if you're this woman's husband; the first thing you do is get a drink. The second thing you do is wonder why you dated your wife instead of miss Alaska 1970; after all, she was interested in dating you. The third thing you do is wonder, "how the hell did she convince me to let that bison in the house". The fourth thing you do is get a shovel. The fifth thing you do is hope for the sweet release of death.

Window Bison is watching you masturbate

for such a small thread, i've lol'd a number of times.

well done folks.

/also how i like my bison

(slight variation of previous joke post)

Bad gnus - if the bison doesn't flex it might yacc.

His boyfriend and girlfriend take care of him.

I feel awkward after that slideshow...

god, I want to fark that bison.

Dear FSM, tell me bison can be house broke. Because Walker is 110% correct with the Boobies.

And can we see a little more of the wife and less bison please.

spentmiles: god, I want to fark that bison.

I know what you mean man there's nothing like a big, hairy, horned, beast between your legs.

It's all fun and games till she pokes an eye out with her hat.

One word: move

"Thi isn't normal...but on meth, it is."

So in a couple of years this will get a 'follow up' tag: Owner of house Bison killed by pet (but with a much funnier headline)

It's not gnus, it's Fark!

spentmiles: god, I want to fark that bison.

the one with the big horns and the turquoise robe-thingy?
she seems to have a pretty nice pair... odd that she wears them on her head like that though. (must be an indian thing)

Isn't wearing a bison head hat sort of like wearing a necklace dipicting Jesus nailed to the cross? I doubt the bison likes being reminded of what a nice rug he'll make after the wife's beaded necklace business goes belly up and they have to shoot the farker.

Yah-bah-dah-bah-doh!

Mantour: [www.freemasonry.bcy.ca image 222x300]

Yah-bah-dah-bah-doh!

So what happens when the pet bison gets sick in the house?

You let the chips fall where they may.

ZeroCorpse: If I were single, I'd do her... But only if she leaves the hat on.

/Not really.
//Well... Maybe.



/She will go Moooo, just like your mother did last night!

Balchinian: So what happens when the pet bison gets sick in the house?

You let the chips fall where they may.

Nicely done.

RIP Bison

I once had to cut the head off a buffalo, it had gotten its head lodged in the opening of a guys trailer, and choked to death, he pulled into our firehall with it, and the only way was to cut the head off and let the body fall. Used our chop saw,had to get hosed off after. Love my job.

CSB

You put it out of its misery

HOLY shiat-TH!

could you imagine scooping piles of bison shiat before you had to cut the grass..

fark that..

His wife looks horny.

I'd rather have a buffalo take a diarrhea dump in my ear .

Why are you asking us? Ask the guy on a buffalo.

I love my dead gay bi son.

I have lived in Texas my entire life and I can tell you this is exactly how all of us live.

I had no idea that we were to take the "Oh give me a home where the buffalo roam" literally. Still, that's a very handsome beast they have there. Very cool.

\Tatanka

Most folk'll never keep a bison. But then again some folk'll.

I don't know shiat about the pet Bison, Dog, but What. The. Fark. There is one rug in this house. One. Why, for the sake of all that is holy, do you have to run from wherever the fark you are in the house to puke on the ONE rug?? And why, pray tell, do you think that the cure for nausea is scarfing mass quantities of cat food and then drinking the entire toilet bowl, thus ensuring a freakin' lake of mushy puke all over the freakin' ONE RUG in this house?? And why do you have to puke, move to a clean spot, puke more, repeat, repeat, repeat??

/would trade dog for buffalo today

If that thing decides to jump in the bed with you at night, somebody's gonna get hurt.

Please take these people's voting rights away.

I'd bison paper towels.

Yeah, they're gonna get squished.

I've had to help fellow grad students vaccinate and take blood from bison calves. That took four of us and that was enough only because the bison were generally amenable to the procedures. When they weren't, they just got up and tried to get away from us. Meanwhile, the four of us were holding on for dear life. My point is that these critters are strong as fark, and I wouldn't want to be in the same house with one when he gets pissed.

Chariset: They have two pet bison and a pet wolf named Jewell Spirit.

I'll bet they'd have an answer if you asked each what his/her totem animal is. They probably wouldn't even have to think about it.

$20 says that the answer(s) would be "Bison/Wolf".

Osomatic's picture inspired me


Well listen everybody, to what I got to say,
There's hope for tomorrow, ooh we're workin'on today

Thank you, thank you, all of you, for the laughs. I think I'm going to choke I'm laughing so hard.
Also, I'm confused by this part of the "article":
"My son was the first person to ever ski behind a buffalo - on water skis and on sand. My daughter was the first person to ever snow sled behind a buffalo."
Was the buffalo running? Was the buffalo on skis? A sled? I would like to see a picture of THAT!

You should not play with food!

/Hmmm, bison-burger

Buffalo gals won't you come out tonight.

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

Oznog: Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

No, Texas buffalo Texas buffalo buffalo buffalo Texas buffalo.

Porous Horace

(slight variation of previous joke post)

Bad gnus - if the bison doesn't flex it might yacc.


Wish I'd sed that.

This is SUCH and epically stupid thing to do. These people will get seriously hurt by those buffalo some day. I've heard of people trying to raise beef bull calves like this and it never works out. Sure they're cute when they're young and they love you and rub up against you and sip a bottle from you, but once they're 1000 pounds, one bad reaction on their part or an urge for some horseplay and you are dead. Animals this big do not make good pets. If you love them let them run wild.

spiderpaz: This is SUCH and epically stupid thing to do. These people will get seriously hurt by those buffalo some day. I've heard of people trying to raise beef bull calves like this and it never works out. Sure they're cute when they're young and they love you and rub up against you and sip a bottle from you, but once they're 1000 pounds, one bad reaction on their part or an urge for some horseplay and you are dead. Animals this big do not make good pets. If you love them let them run wild.

You sound like a Chihuahua owner. Man up. Go out and get yourself an adult honey badger to domesticate. You'll be better for it.

poe_zlaw: I have lived in Texas my entire life and I can tell you this is exactly how all of us live.

Do not be sharing this kind of information with the Non-Texan Infidels. It will be as bad as the New Yorker invasion of '78.

spiderpaz: Animals this big do not make good pets. If you love them let them run wild BBQ them.


FTFY

JohnAnnArbor: There is such a thing as miniature cattle.

Either that or this guy is twenty-three feet tall.

spentmiles: JohnAnnArbor: There is such a thing as miniature cattle.

Either that or this guy is twenty-three feet tall.

[i45.tinypic.com image 400x519]

Tinypic. You just had to host THAT image on tinypic, didn't you?