If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Washington Post)   Military body armor is a poor fit for women because boobies   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 161
    More: Obvious, female soldiers, Armed Services Committee, House Armed Services Committee, protective equipment, authorization bill  
•       •       •

12323 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 May 2012 at 5:41 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



161 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-05-21 06:34:10 PM  
www.aaanything.net
 
2012-05-21 06:35:32 PM  

Jument: Soonerpsycho: [i.imgur.com image 640x810]

I have no idea who she's dressed up as and I don't care.


Venture Bros.
Don't remember the name of the character tho.
 
2012-05-21 06:38:14 PM  
Are women doing dismounted patrols in a combat theater now? If they are doing mounted patrols then they are MPs so fark em.

If not, i really don't see an issue here.
 
2012-05-21 06:38:19 PM  
Aren't you supposed to go to war with the armor (or boobies) you have?

/ obscure
 
2012-05-21 06:40:08 PM  
And here I thought I was going to be clever by posting a pic of a gal in a chainmail bikini
 
2012-05-21 06:41:46 PM  

thewitchking: Jument: Soonerpsycho: [i.imgur.com image 640x810]

I have no idea who she's dressed up as and I don't care.

Venture Bros.
Don't remember the name of the character tho.


Molotov Cocktease
 
2012-05-21 06:42:11 PM  

Julie Cochrane: It's probably the combination of stacked with small waist where they're running into problems. A chick who's flat-chested could just lash into a scrawny vest, and a chick who trends a bit beefy (not that that's allowed as much as it used to be the way they're cracking down on everyone's weight) would be fine with the boobs just squashed on in.

But if you have a chick who's got boobies and a small waist, and you have the plates in the vest, you may not be able to get a vest that both covers the boobs and lashes in properly around the waist. Also, they're not saying it, but some of the chicks going into the service have boob implants, and those don't squish down quite as well as natural breasts do. That may be causing problems, too.

We just aren't shaped like you. At least, you seem to like us better when we're not.


I believe that the armor doesn't work as well if it isn't well fitted. My understanding is that a woman with a small waist and large breasts would have some air gaps where the armor doesn't fit right, and not receive good protection in those areas
 
2012-05-21 06:44:07 PM  
As Commandant Chesty Puller said, "Woman Marines should be whores for the grunts."

Semper Fi!
 
2012-05-21 06:44:22 PM  
mazinworld.net
 
2012-05-21 06:45:22 PM  
I like this thread. It's exciting!
 
2012-05-21 06:47:11 PM  
 
2012-05-21 06:48:48 PM  

Because People in power are Stupid: Blame the director not the actress. (She's a former gymnast)


Or the armorer. Plate armor needs to be correctly fitted - ideally custom-made - to the wearer. It's as uncomfortable and awkward as hell if it isn't.
 
2012-05-21 06:49:33 PM  

Gleeman: NSFW (+2 to A/C / +8 to Confusion in male opponents)


the wound she sustained in battle is clearly visible & proof of the more cover the better.
 
2012-05-21 06:52:49 PM  

phalamir: JWideman: You fit the armor, or you don't go into combat.

So what you are saying is that each and every man who has ever been in the United States military has had the exact same physical dimensions.


No, there is an accepted range. I refer you to U.S. Navy Height/Weight Chart
Pay particular attention to the line that says Height waivers for applicants above 80 inches or below 57 inches are not authorized.
I have met plenty of women in the military that would have no problem wearing the armor. I have also met plenty of tiny little women in the military that would disappear under a helmet. Guess which ones the article is about.
 
2012-05-21 06:53:28 PM  
application.denofgeek.com

/Here to chew bubblegum & kick ass
//All out of bubblegum
 
2012-05-21 06:54:48 PM  

GroverCleveland: [i98.photobucket.com image 298x450]


Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
 
2012-05-21 06:58:53 PM  
I used to fence in uni because I'm a nerd. The girls had these nice, tight fencing jackets that came with special front pockets to hold these plastic cups to protect the precious. Girls looked good in fencing whites.
 
2012-05-21 06:59:55 PM  
i204.photobucket.com


Apparently the overlap for sexy female armor and effective female armor is corsets


/You gonna' get purged
 
2012-05-21 07:03:08 PM  
Also, skimpy armor has some basis in reality, and actually makes perfect sense when you realize that it's designed to be used in conjunction with a big-ass shield.

If a shield is your primary defense, you only really need to armor the parts of your body that the shield doesn't cover well (head, weapon arm, lower legs, strong side thigh + hip). Torso armor is mainly of value as a defense against arrows, not melee weapons.

Armor is a trade-off, you're sacrificing speed for protection. Lighter/less armor means you're less likely to overheat, and have more endurance and mobility.
 
2012-05-21 07:03:20 PM  
img41.imageshack.us
 
2012-05-21 07:05:37 PM  

Julie Cochrane: It's probably the combination of stacked with small waist where they're running into problems. A chick who's flat-chested could just lash into a scrawny vest, and a chick who trends a bit beefy (not that that's allowed as much as it used to be the way they're cracking down on everyone's weight) would be fine with the boobs just squashed on in.

But if you have a chick who's got boobies and a small waist, and you have the plates in the vest, you may not be able to get a vest that both covers the boobs and lashes in properly around the waist. Also, they're not saying it, but some of the chicks going into the service have boob implants, and those don't squish down quite as well as natural breasts do. That may be causing problems, too.

We just aren't shaped like you. At least, you seem to like us better when we're not.


I heard the rumor that chicks were joining the military to GET implants.
 
2012-05-21 07:05:44 PM  

xen0blue: women shouldn't be in the military, let alone in combat

I'm just saying what everyone else is already thinking and won't admit


Probably not, but unfortunately need lands us with the situation we have, rather than with the situation we wish we had. In an all-volunteer military, and with some of the ambiguous situations we have to send troops into, we need women both in the military and in combat.

So we do what the military has always done when faced with what it needs to do instead of what it wants to do---we quit whining, we suck it up, and we do the damn job.

In other military situations in other military times we may again someday have the luxury of not having women in combat, or in the military. Times change, societies change. But right now, having women troops present to talk to local civilian women when there's contact is saving lives--military and civilian.

I know you're trolling. Thing is, I would have actually agreed with your position on front line combat--until it turned out that there's this weird, quirky cultural feature that makes this niche value for female troops.

The weird separation of the sexes taboos in Iraq and Afghanistan means our female soldiers can go in and interrogate local women, by just chatting with them, and local men pretty much can't get in the way.

So it started off in Iraq where specwar types going in on intelligence gathering missions would take a female soldier who was a linguist in with them. And it was so useful that it's pretty much expanded to a general acceptance that having a woman in your unit might save your life, because if you're going through someplace and there's a threat that could kill all of you----a local civilian woman won't tell you anything, but she might tell a woman in your unit about it.

Some days you catches chicken, other days you catches feathers.

It just happens that in this particular war, there is a niche value for women in combat. Go figure.
 
2012-05-21 07:09:04 PM  

Gimmick: And here I thought I was going to be clever by posting a pic of a gal in a chainmail bikini


It's cool, you can be clever.
 
2012-05-21 07:10:23 PM  

Gleeman: NSFW (+2 to A/C / +8 to Confusion in male opponents)


i just fumbled my long sword.
 
2012-05-21 07:15:35 PM  

xen0blue: women shouldn't be in the military, let alone in combat

I'm just saying what everyone else is already thinking and won't admit


If by "everyone" you mean "not everyone", then yeah.

/I honestly do not care why you have in your skivvies, or what you prefer to find in your partners skivvies, if you want to join up and fight you should be allowed to do so.
 
2012-05-21 07:19:42 PM  

jslater25: Julie Cochrane: It's probably the combination of stacked with small waist where they're running into problems. A chick who's flat-chested could just lash into a scrawny vest, and a chick who trends a bit beefy (not that that's allowed as much as it used to be the way they're cracking down on everyone's weight) would be fine with the boobs just squashed on in.

But if you have a chick who's got boobies and a small waist, and you have the plates in the vest, you may not be able to get a vest that both covers the boobs and lashes in properly around the waist. Also, they're not saying it, but some of the chicks going into the service have boob implants, and those don't squish down quite as well as natural breasts do. That may be causing problems, too.

We just aren't shaped like you. At least, you seem to like us better when we're not.

I heard the rumor that chicks were joining the military to GET implants.


Wow. If I was a recruiter and I managed to get a chick who would pass all the standards to bite that line, I'd buy myself an extra beer that weekend.

All I can say is that any recruiter who had women signing away several years of their lives to deploy into combat zones and come home with potentially lifelong, debilitating mental health problems just so they could quit stuffing their bras---hell, that bastard must be getting laid every night.

Good for him.
 
2012-05-21 07:19:43 PM  
i172.photobucket.com

Problem solved.
 
2012-05-21 07:20:50 PM  

One Bad Apple: [i204.photobucket.com image 640x480]


Apparently the overlap for sexy female armor and effective female armor is corsets


/You gonna' get purged


digital-art-gallery.com

Also, if it's made of metal, it must go along with the curves, if any.

/For the Motherland!
 
2012-05-21 07:23:45 PM  

Julie Cochrane: Wow. If I was a recruiter and I managed to get a chick who would pass all the standards to bite that line, I'd buy myself an extra beer that weekend.

All I can say is that any recruiter who had women signing away several years of their lives to deploy into combat zones and come home with potentially lifelong, debilitating mental health problems just so they could quit stuffing their bras---hell, that bastard must be getting laid every night.

Good for him.


In some military hospitals, military doctors will do plastic surgery. It's a way of practicing reconstructive surgery that they might need to use in a combat zone or to help someone after a mastectomy. The rules state that the patient must pay for the cost of the operating suite and the cost of any implants and medical supplies used. The doctor's time is "free" - no doctor bills to worry about, because the doctor and anesthesiologist and nurses are using it as a "training exercise". But it's still not a "free" surgery to the patient.
 
2012-05-21 07:25:27 PM  

morgantx: Julie Cochrane: Wow. If I was a recruiter and I managed to get a chick who would pass all the standards to bite that line, I'd buy myself an extra beer that weekend.

All I can say is that any recruiter who had women signing away several years of their lives to deploy into combat zones and come home with potentially lifelong, debilitating mental health problems just so they could quit stuffing their bras---hell, that bastard must be getting laid every night.

Good for him.

In some military hospitals, military doctors will do plastic surgery. It's a way of practicing reconstructive surgery that they might need to use in a combat zone or to help someone after a mastectomy. The rules state that the patient must pay for the cost of the operating suite and the cost of any implants and medical supplies used. The doctor's time is "free" - no doctor bills to worry about, because the doctor and anesthesiologist and nurses are using it as a "training exercise". But it's still not a "free" surgery to the patient.


But I'm guessing it's less costly than in a regular hospital.
 
2012-05-21 07:26:44 PM  
In other news, women are a poor fit in the military.
 
2012-05-21 07:30:57 PM  
Easy fix:

vicmackey.trakt.tv
 
2012-05-21 07:32:23 PM  

phrawgh: In other news, women are a poor fit in the military.


But the military endeavour to be a good fit in women.
 
2012-05-21 07:34:37 PM  

Lone Stranger: So it's not good to have a rack in Iraq?


Pretty much - only time in my life that I was actually gratefully for a my A-cup chest. Well, that and running, running with a big chest just looks uncomfortable.
 
2012-05-21 07:36:00 PM  

thisisarepeat: Are women doing dismounted patrols in a combat theater now? If they are doing mounted patrols then they are MPs so fark em.


Riding turret in a convoy. Close enough for me.
 
2012-05-21 07:37:12 PM  

military armrest: Lone Stranger: So it's not good to have a rack in Iraq?

Pretty much - only time in my life that I was actually gratefully for a my A-cup chest. Well, that and running, running with a big chest just looks uncomfortable.


As a fan of cute, miniature petites... how YOU doin'?
 
2012-05-21 07:37:58 PM  

CygnusDarius: But I'm guessing it's less costly than in a regular hospital.


Yes, because you don't have doctor's fees.

In general, a lot of people don't realize how military medicine actually WORKS, though. With a regular M.D., they get to decide which patients to accept, which procedures to perform, etc. So you can see a surgeon who specializes in NOTHING but boob jobs, or a urologist who does NOTHING but vasectomy reversals. And because they specialize, they do tend to be fairly good. In the military, our doctors get reassigned just like everybody else. Yes, sometimes they'll develop some amazing new procedures or techniques, but they really can't "specialize" in one thing to the exclusion of everybody else. The goal with military medicine is for our doctors to be well-rounded, and since the military pays for continuing education for our doctors, they often do things that may seem silly because they're trying to provide doctors with an opportunity to practice their skills and stay fresh on techniques they may not do very often.

So military doctors do things like elective plastic surgery for "free" because it helps them keep their skills current. Some of our major military hospitals (especially teaching hospitals) will accept a certain number of ambulance visits from civilians (usually trauma) as a way to keep their trauma skills sharp for the time when they may be deployed to a combat zone. A lot of our doctors volunteer their time (often taking one afternoon a week away from work or some other arrangement) with free clinics to treat indigent civilians because they need a specific type of experience that you may not see often in the military (for example, a doctor who volunteers at a methadone clinic). It seems a little weird, but it really DOES serve a valid purpose.
 
2012-05-21 07:46:08 PM  
Hello!?! Everyone forget this metal bikini? Slackers!

t0.gstatic.com
 
2012-05-21 07:47:31 PM  
NSS?

;)
 
2012-05-21 08:00:22 PM  

xen0blue: women shouldn't be in the military, let alone in combat

I'm just saying what everyone else is already thinking and won't admit


-24.6/10

/you're really new to this whole "troll" thing, aren't you?
 
2012-05-21 08:04:46 PM  
Which sounds like enough for plenty of souped-up Spanx

That was a perfectly nice article until Al decided to go there. Where's his editor?

ZzeusS: Fully armored and ready to kick ass. Bonus - it's chocolate.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 590x796]


Conquered the Kitchen already, I see.
 
2012-05-21 08:05:36 PM  
You just need to make accommodations...
img809.imageshack.us
 
2012-05-21 08:06:12 PM  

xen0blue: women shouldn't be in the military, let alone in combat

I'm just saying what everyone else is already thinking and won't admit


Dude, you want to talk sexist stereotype, stick 50-100 women in a squad. Get thier periods nice and synched. Don't give them any chocolate, birth control, midol, or even basic humane things like tampons. Feed them nothing but bad lifetime movies about rape, female circumcision, and similar things.

Then drop them from planes onto the enemy a day before flow.

That's a sexist comment. Yours was just kinda sad.

Though I believe there exists a strong yet subtle desire to keep women from 'the worst' combat. I agree with whomever said American culture is not mentally ready to see scores of women coming home in body bags or double-triple amputees in the same fashion we see our young men savaged. We work towards equality, but are not egalitarian.
 
2012-05-21 08:12:51 PM  
Hmm. I was expecting the farkettes to take over this thread with a "men in uniform are so hot" attitude. But it appears that's the only topic we haven't been covering.

/as long as they pass the same pre-reqs as the guys, I'm all for women in combat even though I agree it will be culture shock for America when the body bags situation happens.
 
2012-05-21 08:20:06 PM  

just passing through: Hmm. I was expecting the farkettes to take over this thread with a "men in uniform are so hot" attitude. But it appears that's the only topic we haven't been covering.

/as long as they pass the same pre-reqs as the guys, I'm all for women in combat even though I agree it will be culture shock for America when the body bags situation happens.


Great idea!

farm5.static.flickr.com

www.poormojo.org

/BTW, GIS for "sexy men in uniform" is really ... um ... interesting...
 
2012-05-21 08:21:46 PM  

Because People in power are Stupid: hermitage_deux: Because People in power are Stupid: [www.forevergeek.com image 600x399]
Relevant to her interests.

why does Bri walk funny... is she on stilts or what?

doesn't make a convincing swordsman, if she is barely able to move from A to B.

Blame the director not the actress. (She's a former gymnast)


I thinks it's just her armor slowing her down. I like how the director uses a lot of forced perspective to make her look huge though.
 
2012-05-21 08:28:05 PM  
Who needs armour?

th01.deviantart.net
 
2012-05-21 08:28:59 PM  

YouPeopleAreCrazy: thisisarepeat: Are women doing dismounted patrols in a combat theater now? If they are doing mounted patrols then they are MPs so fark em.

Riding turret in a convoy. Close enough for me.


This.

And this Link

Ya think this female medevac medic doesn't need body armor, because she's "not alowed" in combat???
 
2012-05-21 08:30:32 PM  
I should read the article before I comment, but I suddenly find I don't have the energy. So, I'm just going to spout off. Ya'll have been warned; feel free to skip the remainder of the post.

In the 80s when the army first set the goal enlisting 30% females, we students were told the females would cover all sorts of support jobs, such as paper pushing, freeing up more men for combat related duties. Adding all of these females would allow the army to remain all volunteer and spare the country a future draft. Every girl I knew with a younger brother was interested.

Now, there seems to be a genuine push to have females spearhead landings on beaches or something.

I'm only a civilian. I've never, never served in any military organization, but from my highly uninformed perspective, it seems the military likes to do things they've always been done no longer how illogical or senseless. Examples follow.

The army seems to have an issue with rape, but each and every female is NOT issued a side arm which she is required to keep with her at all times or very nearly. How expensive can a Glock for each female service member really be?

Arms training, as i understand it from the unreliable hearsay I've been exposed to, consists of giving females far too little training on weapons they can barely lift much less use effectively. I don't hunt, but aren't there scaled down rifles for younger, say 12 or 13 year old, boys? Why not provide smaller rifles to smaller people? It could be applied to shorter men also.

Completely off the topic of females, I've read that the army continues to put the lowest ranking and youngest people on watch and then non-commissioned officers get all pissy when they fall asleep. This is madness in face of the stack of research that shows how much sleep adolescents require. Only infants need more sleep. My advice, tuck your 18 and 19 year olds into bed at night and put some crusty Sgt. on watch - you know somebody who is old enough to stay awake through his shift.

I don't know. Maybe I'm completely wrong about everything. I haven't been there.
 
2012-05-21 08:40:38 PM  

Lunaville: Arms training, as i understand it from the unreliable hearsay I've been exposed to, consists of giving females far too little training on weapons they can barely lift much less use effectively. I don't hunt, but aren't there scaled down rifles for younger, say 12 or 13 year old, boys? Why not provide smaller rifles to smaller people? It could be applied to shorter men also.


Because we already issue small weapons. Soldiers don't carry full sized rifles anymore, unless they are snipers. They carry M4 carbines (except the Marines, they like the M16). These things are not heavy. A stock Colt M4 is just under 7 pounds with a 30 round mag in it. Even when you bolt lots of extra bits on they don't get much heavier. My SIG516 (a civilian variant made by Sig) has metal quad rails, a big reflex sight, a gas piston system, longer barrel, and so on and it is still light enough I can hold and aim it one handed (and these are all two handed weapons).

The M4 is just not that hard to deal with. It isn't all that big, isn't all that heavy, and doesn't have all that much recoil. You'd have to be real, real small before it would give you any serious trouble.

The days of large battle rifles ended with Vietnam.
 
Displayed 50 of 161 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report