If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(io9)   The 10 most depressing alternate realities from Marvel Comics   (io9.com) divider line 94
    More: Sad, Marvel Comics, comics, X-Force, Iceman, biosphere, Jean Grey, alien species  
•       •       •

11821 clicks; posted to Geek » on 19 May 2012 at 10:02 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



94 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-05-19 07:40:54 AM
What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?
 
2012-05-19 10:15:06 AM

FirstNationalBastard: What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?


Key word FTFH "alternate" Marvel-616 is mainstream Marvel reality
 
2012-05-19 10:18:17 AM

LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?

Key word FTFH "alternate" Marvel-616 is mainstream Marvel reality


media.skateboard.com.au

/c'mon... explained the way I posted it, which is a perfectly cromulent explanation BTW, that whole story sounds like a bad "What If" that Jim Shooter told a coked up Frank Miller he couldn't write.
 
2012-05-19 10:18:40 AM
#6 is one of the most depressing things I have ever read.
 
2012-05-19 10:20:47 AM

FirstNationalBastard: LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?

Key word FTFH "alternate" Marvel-616 is mainstream Marvel reality

[media.skateboard.com.au image 452x339]

/c'mon... explained the way I posted it, which is a perfectly cromulent explanation BTW, that whole story sounds like a bad "What If" that Jim Shooter told a coked up Frank Miller he couldn't write.


No doubt. It's a terrible storyline. I'm a DC guy more than marvel, so I just have the whole New 52 to complain about.
 
2012-05-19 10:22:43 AM
Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...
 
2012-05-19 10:22:47 AM
No Age of Apocalypse?
 
2012-05-19 10:25:06 AM

LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?

Key word FTFH "alternate" Marvel-616 is mainstream Marvel reality

[media.skateboard.com.au image 452x339]

/c'mon... explained the way I posted it, which is a perfectly cromulent explanation BTW, that whole story sounds like a bad "What If" that Jim Shooter told a coked up Frank Miller he couldn't write.

No doubt. It's a terrible storyline. I'm a DC guy more than marvel, so I just have the whole New 52 to complain about.


NuDC drove me out of mainstream comics.

Now, as for the topic at hand...

Why did they not mention the fine Garth Ennis story, Punisher Kills the Marvel Universe?

Wasn't that depressing enough?

And isn't anything Chuck Austen wrote automatically both depressing and considered to have happened in an alternate universe at this point, thanks to She Hulk(v4) #21 and the A-Holes?
 
2012-05-19 10:25:40 AM
How about the one where the President who loses in Florida wins through corruption, leads the country into a lake of shiat for 8 years, destroys the economy and forces billions to be spent to protect the same people who drove us off the cliff. The housing market crumbles; major cities such as Detroit become demilitarized war zones.

There's a change in power but the derp virus has spread too far. Watch before your very eyes as idiots question established birth control and women's rights, see companies champion environmental disaster through fracking and oil spills. Bees oddly are targeted, but an independent lab finds data linking GMO crops to the issue. That lab is then bought by the company who's crops were in question.

Protections once put in place to prevent catastrophe are slowly eroded, including the use of propaganda on the citizens who were supposed to embody the zenith of what it means to be free.

How about that reality.
 
2012-05-19 10:25:44 AM
The Hulk one is just weird.

On the DC tip, The Dark Knight Returns was a little depressing. I didn't read the sequel though.
 
2012-05-19 10:26:32 AM

Subdue their bellies: Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...


media.comicvine.com
 
2012-05-19 10:29:36 AM

Znuh: How about the one where the President who loses in Florida wins through corruption, leads the country into a lake of shiat for 8 years, destroys the economy and forces billions to be spent to protect the same people who drove us off the cliff. The housing market crumbles; major cities such as Detroit become demilitarized war zones.

There's a change in power but the derp virus has spread too far. Watch before your very eyes as idiots question established birth control and women's rights, see companies champion environmental disaster through fracking and oil spills. Bees oddly are targeted, but an independent lab finds data linking GMO crops to the issue. That lab is then bought by the company who's crops were in question.

Protections once put in place to prevent catastrophe are slowly eroded, including the use of propaganda on the citizens who were supposed to embody the zenith of what it means to be free.

How about that reality.


Howbout you go fornicate yourself with a stick and take your political derp and whining that you complain about infecting everything, yet you're spreading like you're some diseased, shiat flinging monkey, back to the politics tab where it belongs?

/And where was Days of Future Past universe?
 
2012-05-19 10:32:02 AM
Is that the one where Captain America gets pectoral cancer and dies?
 
2012-05-19 10:33:42 AM

skepticultist: Is that the one where Captain America gets pectoral cancer and dies?


Obviously his right breast is full of tumors... look at how much it sticks out in a profile shot.
 
2012-05-19 10:35:52 AM
Marvel Zombies? The world's population gets consumed by undead superheros. Does it get shoved into some other category besides alternative reality in comic book terms?
 
2012-05-19 10:38:23 AM

Copperbelly watersnake: Marvel Zombies? The world's population gets consumed by undead superheros. Does it get shoved into some other category besides alternative reality in comic book terms?


Yes, it is a depressing alternate reality.

Looking at the books these depressing realities came from, I'm betting the "writer" of this "article" recently got a really cheap run of "What If?" on ebay, and had to show his superior obscure geek fanboy knowledge to everyone.
 
2012-05-19 10:38:58 AM
The most depressing What If I remember reading was the one where Viktor Von Doom realizes Reed Richards is just trying to help with his experiment, recognizes his own hubris, and with Reed's help saves his mother from hell. Thus he doesn't turn to evil. He ends up building the same armor, but this time its gold, and he becomes a hero to the world and his people. But Mephisto gets his revenge, and Valeria ends up in Hell in place of his mother, and Doom still ends up living a tragedy. It wasn't depressing in the "Oh noes, everybody is dead!" sense, but tragic on a much smaller scale. The last four pages or so still feel like an absolute kick in the jimmies though.
 
2012-05-19 10:43:02 AM
Which reality did the two Fantastic Four movies take place in? That was pretty damn depressing too.
 
2012-05-19 10:49:32 AM

LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: LucklessWonder: FirstNationalBastard: What, no mentioning the reality where Spidey makes a deal with the devil so his Ancient Aunt who already has one foot in the grave will live, and all it will cost him is the hot redheaded supermodel he's been banging for years?

Key word FTFH "alternate" Marvel-616 is mainstream Marvel reality

[media.skateboard.com.au image 452x339]


/c'mon... explained the way I posted it, which is a perfectly cromulent explanation BTW, that whole story sounds like a bad "What If" that Jim Shooter told a coked up Frank Miller he couldn't write.

No doubt. It's a terrible storyline. I'm a DC guy more than marvel, so I just have the whole New 52 to complain about.


All i read nowadays is idw's transformers...

Shane mccarthy sucks balls

/fark Drift
 
2012-05-19 10:49:48 AM

Mugato: The Hulk one is just weird.

On the DC tip, The Dark Knight Returns was a little depressing. I didn't read the sequel though.


There's something about the ending of Hulk: The End that's stuck with me. It's really sad.
 
2012-05-19 10:51:39 AM
It ends on a high note, but the Super Boy Annual Elseworlds was very depressing imo.

The world has been conquered by aliens who would kill 1,000 humans any time someone with super powers fought back against the Aliens. Humans then turned on the Meta-humans, killing several of them and broke the Flashes legs.

The rest of the Metas went into hiding and allowed the earth to be subjected to alien rule.

Except the goddamn Batman who kept doing what the Batman does.

Eventually some of the remaining heroes get Supes back into the fight and they take back earth, but most of the comic was a downer... lots of people die in that book.
 
2012-05-19 10:57:04 AM

texdent: No Age of Apocalypse?


AoA is Disneyland compared to these realities.
 
2012-05-19 11:15:31 AM
img.flapon.com
 
2012-05-19 11:16:33 AM
imgc.allpostersimages.com
 
2012-05-19 11:21:14 AM
Stuff getting nuked seems popular.
 
2012-05-19 11:23:16 AM
Always one of my favorites:
tomheroes.com
 
2012-05-19 11:25:50 AM
The end of the Superman episode 'Apokolips... NOW!' was more depressing than all of those story lines combined. Hell, the end of the BTAS episode 'Baby Doll' was also a complete tear jerker, as was 'Heart of Ice'. You don't have to kill everyone to make something depressing. Usually just killing one person is enough. Grave of the Fireflies is a great example of that.
 
2012-05-19 11:31:44 AM
Aren't #7 and #6 the same alternate universe, just from Hulk's and Punisher's perspectives respectively?

And Earth-0000 has to be the most depressing of all.
 
2012-05-19 11:37:33 AM
When: What if Cable had destroyed the X-Men?

You mean like comcast?

/knows nothing about comics. Thought you'd like to know.
 
2012-05-19 11:45:07 AM
STILL not as depressing as a week's worth of Funky Winkerbean.
 
2012-05-19 11:56:52 AM
Someone mentioned this in TFA comments:

img.gawkerassets.com

and it's true
 
2012-05-19 11:58:23 AM
11: The one where not every single female had at least a D cup.
 
2012-05-19 12:00:31 PM
Haven't read the article yet. Does it mention the reality where Stan Lee enriches and aggrandizes himself while leaving the artists who did the real work destitute and unacknowledged? Oh wait, that isn't an alternate reality, it is the real reality.
 
2012-05-19 12:20:34 PM
#5, that image they used...yeah....uh....not quite sure where to go with that one.
 
2012-05-19 12:21:19 PM

FirstNationalBastard: Copperbelly watersnake: Marvel Zombies? The world's population gets consumed by undead superheros. Does it get shoved into some other category besides alternative reality in comic book terms?

Yes, it is a depressing alternate reality.

Looking at the books these depressing realities came from, I'm betting the "writer" of this "article" recently got a really cheap run of "What If?" on ebay, and had to show his superior obscure geek fanboy knowledge to everyone.


Hey, the purchase is now tax deductible as a buisness expense.Guy is a genius.
 
2012-05-19 12:22:40 PM
mostinsteresingman.jpg I don't normally read comics, but when I do I like the gritty, super-dark, worst-case scenario ones. My brother had those Ruins ones and I loved them.
 
2012-05-19 12:23:18 PM
TFA is mostly comprised of What If...? storylines, the bulk of which could be summarized as "everyone dies by the end," which has zero shock value after a while, even less so considering that death is a revolving door situation in Marvel Comics anyway. Contrast with Ruins (previously mentioned), which is truly depressing as hell.
 
2012-05-19 12:31:37 PM
Wha, no Marvel Zombies?
 
2012-05-19 12:36:38 PM

ck1938: Haven't read the article yet. Does it mention the reality where Stan Lee enriches and aggrandizes himself while leaving the artists who did the real work destitute and unacknowledged? Oh wait, that isn't an alternate reality, it is the real reality.


You just had to be that guy, didn't you?
 
2012-05-19 12:41:14 PM
The whole Captain Marvel series (Marvel Comics) from Mar-Vell's death to EVERYTHING that followed.
/sad
//pathetic
///tragic story writing
 
2012-05-19 12:44:03 PM

Znuh: How about the one where the President who loses in Florida wins through corruption, leads the country into a lake of shiat for 8 years, destroys the economy and forces billions to be spent to protect the same people who drove us off the cliff. The housing market crumbles; major cities such as Detroit become demilitarized war zones.

There's a change in power but the derp virus has spread too far. Watch before your very eyes as idiots question established birth control and women's rights, see companies champion environmental disaster through fracking and oil spills. Bees oddly are targeted, but an independent lab finds data linking GMO crops to the issue. That lab is then bought by the company who's crops were in question.

Protections once put in place to prevent catastrophe are slowly eroded, including the use of propaganda on the citizens who were supposed to embody the zenith of what it means to be free.

How about that reality.


Jesus farking christ someone get the shiathandlers in here, a politics farkwit got out again and wants to spray his 'knowledge' all over everything in view.

If we wanted to hear you crap on yourself we would shank ourselve in the kidneys.
 
2012-05-19 12:46:32 PM

kroonermanblack: Jesus farking christ someone get the shiathandlers in here, a politics farkwit got out again and wants to spray his 'knowledge' all over everything in view.If we wanted to hear you crap on yourself we would shank ourselve in the kidneys.


the shock collars must need new batteries
 
2012-05-19 12:48:45 PM

FirstNationalBastard: Subdue their bellies: Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...

[media.comicvine.com image 454x610]


Rob Liefeld provides a valuable service to artists everywhere.

Whenever I draw an absolute piece of abortion excrement all I have to do is look at a typical Liefeld drawing and then I can say "Well, it could have been worse".
 
2012-05-19 12:50:59 PM

Ghastly: Rob Liefeld provides a valuable service to artists everywhere.Whenever I draw an absolute piece of abortion excrement all I have to do is look at a typical Liefeld drawing and then I can say "Well, it could have been worse".


I think most people would have to try to be as bad as liefeld
 
2012-05-19 12:51:07 PM

Subdue their bellies: Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...


No! I said MOAR pouches!!! MOAR!!!!

/And sharpen those feet!
 
2012-05-19 12:55:21 PM

Znuh: How about the one where the President who loses in Florida wins through corruption, leads the country into a lake of shiat for 8 years, destroys the economy and forces billions to be spent to protect the same people who drove us off the cliff. The housing market crumbles; major cities such as Detroit become demilitarized war zones.

There's a change in power but the derp virus has spread too far. Watch before your very eyes as idiots question established birth control and women's rights, see companies champion environmental disaster through fracking and oil spills. Bees oddly are targeted, but an independent lab finds data linking GMO crops to the issue. That lab is then bought by the company who's crops were in question.

Protections once put in place to prevent catastrophe are slowly eroded, including the use of propaganda on the citizens who were supposed to embody the zenith of what it means to be free.

How about that reality.


Was that one of Howard Mackie's realities? It smells like one of his works.
 
2012-05-19 01:01:32 PM
A story arc of Hulk in the early 90s where they discover that his blood can cure HIV; but it would also turn everyone into Hulks. One of Hulk's little kid buddies dies of AIDS an issue or two later.

/not even a What If? story
//could write for Cracked with no problems
 
2012-05-19 01:01:37 PM

born_yesterday: Subdue their bellies: Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...

No! I said MOAR pouches!!! MOAR!!!!

/And sharpen those feet!


25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-05-19 01:04:56 PM

FirstNationalBastard: Subdue their bellies: Heroes Reborn.

What could be more depressing than Rob Liefeld's "art," all clenched teeth and beady eyes and the lack of wrists and misshapen feet, and the pouches? So many pouches...

[media.comicvine.com image 454x610]


Someone paid him to do that. An editor looked at that and said, "Looks good, Rob! A plus!" And that turd signed his name because he was proud of that.

But the worst part is the idea that actual artists were ignored while this turd was getting published.
 
2012-05-19 01:08:37 PM

Malacon: It ends on a high note, but the Super Boy Annual Elseworlds was very depressing imo.


Excellent two parter. Starts in Adventures of Superman Annual #6 and finishes in Superboy Annual #1
 
Displayed 50 of 94 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report