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(Gizmodo)   It is possible to turn shiatty beer into great beer? Here's a better idea: Drink five and why are we even having this conversation?   (gizmodo.com) divider line 44
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2113 clicks; posted to Geek » on 18 May 2012 at 10:08 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-18 09:21:28 PM
If I had a child this is the one piece of advice I would make sure to pass on before I die. "Child, if you have to put something your beer to make it taste good, you're drinking a shiat beer. This life is too short to shiat beer." Then I would put a Guinness in their tiny fist and expire.
 
2012-05-18 10:13:47 PM
While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.
 
2012-05-18 10:22:19 PM
Meh, that's too much work to put into making a crap beer okay. With all of that work, just go buy some decent beer. If you're just a poor college kid and all you can afford is crap beer, then just get it really damn cold, problem solved.
 
2012-05-18 10:28:16 PM
well... I see the link I just submitted isn't going to get greenlit.

should've used the asinine tag...

bsharitt: While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.


New Belgium recently came to town and I tried the Fat Tire for the first time in about 6 years and I had to remark to myself " wow! this tastes just like yuengling at twice the price!!"

but back to the article?

once you have purchased a french press at about $30, and the whole leaf hops depending you have a homebrew shop near by that has whole leaf at whatever the cost and quality may be? remember... that stuff needs to be kept frozen or at the very least REALLY cold to maintain freshness...

you might as well just buy good beer.. you'll save your self the trouble and expense

and just because its loaded with a shiat ton of aromatic hop oils, doesn't make it good beer.
 
2012-05-18 10:29:34 PM
No. Next question.
 
2012-05-18 10:39:53 PM
unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

/been all over the world, tried all kinds of beer. It all fights for second place to German beer.
//still, beer is awesome, its jut levels of awesomeness
 
2012-05-18 10:47:07 PM

Forgot_my_password_again: unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

/been all over the world, tried all kinds of beer. It all fights for second place to German beer.
//still, beer is awesome, its jut levels of awesomeness


I miss quality hefe and cristal weizens.
 
2012-05-18 10:52:45 PM

rickycal78: I miss quality hefe and cristal weizens.


schneider weisse is the greatest beer ever in the history of beer.

www.austrianbeer.co.uk
 
2012-05-18 10:59:13 PM
Simcoe hops in a basically flavorless beer? Guy must like drinking cat pee.
 
2012-05-18 11:05:45 PM
It doesn't really matter what kind of beer it is, drop a shot of vodka in and I'll drink just about anything. Or forget the beer and just give me the bottle of vodka.

/likes beer
//But vodka is king
///Cheap, nasty, burn all the way down vodka please
 
2012-05-18 11:14:01 PM
I can turn shaitty beer into piss in about an hour
 
2012-05-18 11:30:41 PM

Cerebral Knievel: well... I see the link I just submitted isn't going to get greenlit.

should've used the asinine tag...

bsharitt: While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.

New Belgium recently came to town and I tried the Fat Tire for the first time in about 6 years and I had to remark to myself " wow! this tastes just like yuengling at twice the price!!"

but back to the article?

once you have purchased a french press at about $30, and the whole leaf hops depending you have a homebrew shop near by that has whole leaf at whatever the cost and quality may be? remember... that stuff needs to be kept frozen or at the very least REALLY cold to maintain freshness...

you might as well just buy good beer.. you'll save your self the trouble and expense

and just because its loaded with a shiat ton of aromatic hop oils, doesn't make it good beer.


Are you guys excited about July First? I am. I read an article that said soemone from your brewery, Mike something(?) was integral to the lobbying effort on SB604?

Im a NOVA guy, so Im really looking forward to being able to buy pints at my local brewery (Lost Rhino).

Also, FWIW my boss is a big fan of your Brown. He travels to Richmond a lotnand we were talking about my homebrewing when he said "theres this beer I get in Richmond called Legend Brown, its the beat beer Ive ever had, I dont think you can get it up here..."

He was almost disappointed when I told him you can get that in a bunch of places here, even Walmart :)...
 
2012-05-18 11:41:18 PM
I admire the guy's ability to buy Coors light and not feel like a total tool. However, why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it is oxymoronic,
 
2012-05-18 11:45:26 PM

pjbreeze: why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it


SCIENCE!
 
2012-05-18 11:47:58 PM

INeedAName: It doesn't really matter what kind of beer it is, drop a shot of vodka in and I'll drink just about anything. Or forget the beer and just give me the bottle of vodka.

/likes beer
//But vodka is king
///Cheap, nasty, burn all the way down vodka please


With you 100%. Getting my drink on with a big bottle of this as we speak:

www.totalwine.com

$13.80 a handle. The price is right, that's for sure.

Though I do enjoy beer. Mirror Pond, Alaskan Amber and Bridgeport IPA, among others.
 
2012-05-19 12:00:22 AM
Cold. Serve bad beer cold.

Closer to absolute zero, the better.
 
2012-05-19 12:03:28 AM

The Homer Tax: Cerebral Knievel: well... I see the link I just submitted isn't going to get greenlit.

should've used the asinine tag...

bsharitt: While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.

New Belgium recently came to town and I tried the Fat Tire for the first time in about 6 years and I had to remark to myself " wow! this tastes just like yuengling at twice the price!!"

but back to the article?

once you have purchased a french press at about $30, and the whole leaf hops depending you have a homebrew shop near by that has whole leaf at whatever the cost and quality may be? remember... that stuff needs to be kept frozen or at the very least REALLY cold to maintain freshness...

you might as well just buy good beer.. you'll save your self the trouble and expense

and just because its loaded with a shiat ton of aromatic hop oils, doesn't make it good beer.

Are you guys excited about July First? I am. I read an article that said soemone from your brewery, Mike something(?) was integral to the lobbying effort on SB604?

Im a NOVA guy, so Im really looking forward to being able to buy pints at my local brewery (Lost Rhino).

Also, FWIW my boss is a big fan of your Brown. He travels to Richmond a lotnand we were talking about my homebrewing when he said "theres this beer I get in Richmond called Legend Brown, its the beat beer Ive ever had, I dont think you can get it up here..."

He was almost disappointed when I told him you can get that in a bunch of places here, even Walmart :)...


SB604? Can't say it actually effects us, we have a brewpub and have always been able to dock sale. the new bill that was drafted by our assistant head brewer Mike allows production only breweries to sell directly to the consumer with out having to go through a distributor first and without the worry of the overhead of running a restaurant either.

It is a VERY good thing in that it puts the breweries on the same keel as the wineries. but Like I said, it really doesn't effect us as we started out as production only, then opened a pub/tasting room, and grown from there.

here is the guy talking about it, and i'm in the video. look for the big guy with the huge beard in the orange shirt.
 
2012-05-19 12:17:16 AM

pjbreeze: I admire the guy's ability to buy Coors light and not feel like a total tool. However, why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it is oxymoronic,


Im amazed you judge someone on the beer a person drives, who cares?

Subby is right, just drink it and shut the fark up, if you are having a good time then it wont matter.
 
2012-05-19 12:18:05 AM

steamingpile: Im amazed you judge someone on the beer a person drives


I think you've had enough.
 
2012-05-19 01:38:17 AM

steamingpile: pjbreeze: I admire the guy's ability to buy Coors light and not feel like a total tool. However, why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it is oxymoronic,

Im amazed you judge someone on the beer a person drives, who cares?

Subby is right, just drink it and shut the fark up, if you are having a good time then it wont matter.


Don't you understand? He can't have a good time unless other people are drinking beer that meets his standards.
 
2012-05-19 03:28:59 AM
Lately I've just been sticking with Alaskan Amber. It's not cloying or overly bitter. It's just a mild, sweetish, tasty beer that doesn't cost a whole lot more than a typical domestic lager.

But I also live within stumbling distance of the Issaquah brewery, so I can get my fill of some really great beer if I had the gumption.
 
2012-05-19 05:54:04 AM

pjbreeze: I admire the guy's ability to buy Coors light and not feel like a total tool. However, why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it is oxymoronic,


I put some Type R stickers and a giant wing on my Civic, and it added at least 75hp.
 
2012-05-19 06:25:47 AM

Forgot_my_password_again: unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

/been all over the world, tried all kinds of beer. It all fights for second place to German beer.
//still, beer is awesome, its jut levels of awesomeness


Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany. But as you said, beer is awesome. I don't care if it's a sixer of Budweiser tallboys while I'm laying around the pool, there is still a level of awesomeness to it.
 
2012-05-19 08:58:54 AM

Forgot_my_password_again: rickycal78: I miss quality hefe and cristal weizens.

schneider weisse is the greatest beer ever in the history of beer.

[www.austrianbeer.co.uk image 400x400]


Holy carp. It's been years, but Schneider Weisse is one of the first beers I bought in Germany. I was going to be there for about a month and on my first grocery store run, I put a variety of unfamiliar brands and styles of beir in my cart. Got all that back to the hotel and began to sample. On the *next* beer run, I piled in a whole lot more of the Schneider Weisse and a lot less of the other stuff.
 
2012-05-19 09:53:08 AM

Ennuipoet: If I had a child this is the one piece of advice I would make sure to pass on before I die. "Child, if you have to put something your beer to make it taste good, you're drinking a shiat beer. This life is too short to shiat beer." Then I would put a Guinness in their tiny fist and expire.


Your choice was Guinness, not a Dead Guy or Leviathan?
 
2012-05-19 09:54:34 AM

Maverick Couch: steamingpile: pjbreeze: I admire the guy's ability to buy Coors light and not feel like a total tool. However, why waste your time trying to improve something terrible and buying a lot of stuff to do it is oxymoronic,

Im amazed you judge someone on the beer a person drives, who cares?

Subby is right, just drink it and shut the fark up, if you are having a good time then it wont matter.

Don't you understand? He can't have a good time unless other people are drinking beer that meets his standards.


Well it is his clubhouse.

And no girls allowed.
 
2012-05-19 10:05:48 AM

bsharitt: While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.


Are you sure you're not my uncle Ron?
 
2012-05-19 10:31:32 AM

Vangor: Your choice was Guinness, not a Dead Guy or Leviathan?


I'm a traditionalist by nature. I appreciate the finer beers, but for day to day drinking and passing along heritage, the Guinness.
 
2012-05-19 11:37:34 AM

bsharitt: While it's not the best beer in the world, I am glad that Yuengling has finally come to Ohio so I have a cheap beer that's drinkable without flavoring it.


Yuengling is shiat. It's only hyped because we used to have to drive a couple hours away to buy it. A friend of mine would travel to PA a lot and always bring back a few cases. I never saw the appeal at all.

Now, Karlovacko, there's a cheap beer that's good. I can find it for as low as $7 for a 6-pack.
 
2012-05-19 11:44:15 AM

zunkus: Forgot_my_password_again: unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

---

Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany.


*readies the TotalFark Subscription Donation Gun*

But as you said, beer is awesome. I don't care if it's a sixer of Budweiser tallboys while I'm laying around the pool, there is still a level of awesomeness to it.

Huh... gun's jammed.

/not a beer snob
//just won't drink anything from a can. or corn-based.
 
2012-05-19 12:28:38 PM
img593.imageshack.us

$14 for a case of 30 near me.
 
rka
2012-05-19 12:29:38 PM

zunkus: Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany


Not for lack of trying.
 
2012-05-19 01:13:38 PM
White people problems
 
2012-05-19 03:30:57 PM

Mister Peejay: zunkus: Forgot_my_password_again: unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

---

Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany.

*readies the TotalFark Subscription Donation Gun*

But as you said, beer is awesome. I don't care if it's a sixer of Budweiser tallboys while I'm laying around the pool, there is still a level of awesomeness to it.

Huh... gun's jammed.

/not a beer snob
//just won't drink anything from a can. or corn-based.


Fair enough, in some cases (pool at my apt, many of the lakes and rivers around here) bottles are banned because scum bags tend to break them or leave them laying around so I don't mind the occassional can.
 
2012-05-19 03:44:35 PM

rka: zunkus: Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany

Not for lack of trying.


789chan.org
 
2012-05-19 04:09:57 PM
Living in Seattle, you can't swing a cat without hitting a good beer store, micro or nanobrewery, or one of your neighbors homebrews. Schneider Weisse is at Saleh's Delicatessen, as well as a bunch of other tasty brews. Ballard Market also has one of the best beer and wine selections in the city, as well as Bottlewerks, Big Star Beer Market. Brouwer's cafe, Old Town Ale House, Latona Pub, Hopvine Pub, Fiddler's Inn.

A person can get spoiled living here.
 
2012-05-19 04:14:09 PM
and a lot of craft breweries are going to the canning option. just had some guys from Michigan stop by for a visit and a courtesy beer swap. They're a small operation, "artisional" meaning they do Belgium farmhouse styles. And they're only packaging is 16 ounce cans, and of course kegged draft.

as been said many times before.. cans are lighter, light proof, have very little to O2 uptake, they go where bottles don't, are up and cross recyclable.

Hell, I would love to replace the old 22ounce bottling line with a canning line, as long as it's not one of those slow as Fark hand caning machines.

as always, if you don't want to drink out of a can, pour it into a glass.

I did have to give them a bit of shiat for their cans being of an irregular size " how am I supposed to put these into my vintage soda can vending machine!?"

gave them the grand insiders tour of the facilities, and the head brewer guy was in love with all the technology we have in use, and coming on line. like the 100bbl an hour centrifuge that arrives next week! yay! happy dance!


as for corn based beer? no..I make it a point on my civilian tour on Saturdays to crack jokes about PBR and the like, "let it warm up a little, all ow the flavors to blossom and come to the for front. mmmmmmm, mealy! you can really TASTE the corn! I think ( panto-mine taking a sip out of imaginary pint glass, swish mouth, make a slurpy sound like you are drawing in air to enhance the aromatics) yes, amylose-extender sugary-2 from southern Iowa, it was a good growing season too!"

but Ive also said in beer threads past, the best beer in the world is the one in my hand, and they only one better is free beer.

cheap beer has it's time and place and considering that it hits all it's bench marks, tastes like how it should, is consistent, no off flavors, clean and clear, it IS quality beer, weather or not its GOOD beer is a subjective term when you get down to that. but the quality is there.

keep in mind that PBR regularly wins first place at the Great American beer fest for American style lager and most professional brewers that I know usually drink it when they are "slumming" that or Schlitz.

I used to keep the PeeBer around, now I keep Schlitz

would I run Schlitz through a frech press loaded up with whole leaf hops to some how improve it?

no...If I'm drinking Schlitz, its because I WANT to, not because I have to, and if I have to choose to drink a beer like that.. then, well, there are other priority issues at play.

cheers kids
 
2012-05-19 04:48:48 PM

snarketyfarker: Living in Seattle, you can't swing a cat without hitting a good beer store, micro or nanobrewery, or one of your neighbors homebrews. Schneider Weisse is at Saleh's Delicatessen, as well as a bunch of other tasty brews. Ballard Market also has one of the best beer and wine selections in the city, as well as Bottlewerks, Big Star Beer Market. Brouwer's cafe, Old Town Ale House, Latona Pub, Hopvine Pub, Fiddler's Inn.

A person can get spoiled living here.


But it rains and sucks all the time. Don't come here ever unless you're suicidal.
 
2012-05-19 08:12:41 PM

rka: zunkus: Last I checked Belgium wasn't in Germany

Not for lack of trying.


ROFL.
 
rka
2012-05-20 12:18:42 PM

Cerebral Knievel: keep in mind that PBR regularly wins first place at the Great American beer fest for American style lager and most professional brewers that I know usually drink it when they are "slumming" that or Schlitz.


I have to believe that the Brewers Association keeps categories like that and the "American Light Lager" around simply to appease the big dogs and get their sponsorship money.
 
2012-05-20 04:24:08 PM

rka: Cerebral Knievel: keep in mind that PBR regularly wins first place at the Great American beer fest for American style lager and most professional brewers that I know usually drink it when they are "slumming" that or Schlitz.

I have to believe that the Brewers Association keeps categories like that and the "American Light Lager" around simply to appease the big dogs and get their sponsorship money.


Perhaps, but they are fairly difficult stlyes to pull off on a technical level, So there is a challenge there..

My neighbor, the very excited for his new hobby of homebrewing beer shared some of his imperial IPA with me. I commended him a very good job and challenged him to use his Kegarator to make an American style lager next. "If you can do that, and do it well, you can do anything".
 
2012-05-20 04:28:17 PM

Cerebral Knievel: rka: Cerebral Knievel: keep in mind that PBR regularly wins first place at the Great American beer fest for American style lager and most professional brewers that I know usually drink it when they are "slumming" that or Schlitz.

I have to believe that the Brewers Association keeps categories like that and the "American Light Lager" around simply to appease the big dogs and get their sponsorship money.

Perhaps, but they are fairly difficult stlyes to pull off on a technical level, So there is a challenge there..

My neighbor, the very excited for his new hobby of homebrewing beer shared some of his imperial IPA with me. I commended him a very good job and challenged him to use his Kegarator to make an American style lager next. "If you can do that, and do it well, you can do anything".


Brews American style lager.

Still can't catch flies with chopsticks.
 
2012-05-21 11:59:52 AM
Two words: Why bother?

If you want good beer, either buy some, or brew it yourself. I wonder if the author of this article adds some arugala and gouda to a McDonalds burger and calls it gourmet?
 
2012-05-21 06:09:20 PM

Forgot_my_password_again: unless it comes from Germany, you're drinking shiatty beer and should just accept it.

/been all over the world, tried all kinds of beer. It all fights for second place to German beer.
//still, beer is awesome, its jut levels of awesomeness


Blasphemy.

Have you been to San Diego/California breweries?
 
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