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(Comics Alliance)   DC Comics and Dynamic Forces unveil the Watchmen toaster. Alan Moore inconsolable   (comicsalliance.com) divider line 33
    More: Spiffy, Dynamite Entertainment, security guards, Alan Moore, Silk Spectre, plush toys, Rorschach  
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2921 clicks; posted to Geek » on 17 May 2012 at 12:14 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-17 09:32:26 AM
All the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Is there any strawberry jam left?"... and I'll whisper "No."
 
2012-05-17 10:22:58 AM
I'm still waiting on my Dr. Manhattan cerulean blue vibrating dildo.
 
2012-05-17 10:24:17 AM
If Alan Moore was involved it would be a incestuous pedophile rape toaster.
I think I can live without that.
 
2012-05-17 12:18:50 PM
Still not as cool as the Hello Kitty Waffle Iron:

images.businessweek.com

My brother has one; its OK.
 
2012-05-17 12:28:58 PM
Who watches the toast?
 
2012-05-17 12:29:20 PM
Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach. This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll look down and whisper "Your toast is ready."
 
2012-05-17 12:30:13 PM
But who toasts the toaster?
 
2012-05-17 12:32:35 PM
caribbeanbookblog.files.wordpress.com

"doo doo dum de dum, minding my own business..."

DC Comics and Dynamic Forces unveil the Watchmen toaster.

i1.cdnds.net

They did what!?.
 
2012-05-17 12:37:31 PM
Alan Moore has been too busy conspiring against Dethklok to give a damn about some toaster.

www.dethklok.org
 
2012-05-17 12:42:54 PM
It'd be cool if it came with a can of beans.
 
2012-05-17 01:00:52 PM
So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?
 
2012-05-17 01:27:35 PM

Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?


And the funny part... DC couldn't retaliate if they wanted to. They have no franchise licensed for movie rights that could make even a half decent movie.

They'd need to get like 6 companies to agree to coproduce or sign away their rights to do the only good group they have... Justice League.
 
2012-05-17 01:27:54 PM
...and yet, the franchises that would be well served by a toaster tie-in go without.

/Howdy doodly do
 
2012-05-17 01:31:04 PM
It's a complex post-structural metaphor deconstructing how DC treats its properties, and hence a commentary on its future as a business.
 
2012-05-17 01:38:06 PM
DC Comics and Dynamic Forces unveil the Watchmen toaster. Alan Moore inconsolable unleashes the wrath of his Snake God upon them.

Fixed that.
 
2012-05-17 01:38:06 PM
www.blogcdn.com

"What happened to the American Dream?" It came true! You're lookin' at it...
 
2012-05-17 01:59:00 PM
The BSG toaster was awesome... This, not so much.
 
2012-05-17 02:13:50 PM

Quantumbunny: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

And the funny part... DC couldn't retaliate if they wanted to. They have no franchise licensed for movie rights that could make even a half decent movie.

They'd need to get like 6 companies to agree to coproduce or sign away their rights to do the only good group they have... Justice League.


I don't think so. From what I understand, Warner Bros, with ownership of DC, owns all the DC Universe. The problem is that they never want to throw a good director, writer, anything at a project that is no Batman because...well Batman is the only thing that has been successful to them in recent years. I mean, why not get a heavy duty comic writer to do Green Lantern? Why doesn't DC just borrow heavily from the comics like they do in the vastly superior animated movies? Why not just allow the animated movies to be 2 to 2.5 hours and get full theatrical releases?

Bah.
 
2012-05-17 02:23:33 PM

Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?


Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.
 
2012-05-17 02:24:42 PM
Oh also, YAY ANOTHER GREENLIGHT!
 
2012-05-17 05:09:04 PM

rocky_howard: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.


That's the problem: The whole DC movie universe is...Batman. Worse: it's a Batman that had to be rebooted by Nolan after the craptacular direction of Joel Schumacher.

I love DC, really; but it's genuinely disheartening to me as a fan when you have some of the most iconic comic book characters ever in your roster and (other than Nolan's Batman) you can't make a farking decent movie to save your damn life. Meanwhile, your direct competition sticks it's collective neck out and kills it.

It says it all when WB started putting out trailers for Green Lantern and my first thought was "DC/WB FARKS IT UP AGAIN!"
 
2012-05-17 05:18:28 PM
Here's the thing, DC could certainly do something with their universe and even start small and in their wheelhouse for it. If you want to make Batman without making Batman, make some gritty detective movies taking from The Question: The Crime Bible or some of the more supernatural stuff with The Shade or Deadman. All these have strong books Warner can just outright copy onto the screen and it would do well while allowing them to do the whole "movie continuity" dance.
 
2012-05-17 05:20:47 PM

rocky_howard: Oh also, YAY ANOTHER GREENLIGHT!


Nobody cares.
 
HBK
2012-05-17 05:29:54 PM
www.toplessrobot.com

Seems pertinent.
 
2012-05-17 06:36:46 PM

Rwa2play: rocky_howard: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.

That's the problem: The whole DC movie universe is...Batman. Worse: it's a Batman that had to be rebooted by Nolan after the craptacular direction of Joel Schumacher.

I love DC, really; but it's genuinely disheartening to me as a fan when you have some of the most iconic comic book characters ever in your roster and (other than Nolan's Batman) you can't make a farking decent movie to save your damn life. Meanwhile, your direct competition sticks it's collective neck out and kills it.

It says it all when WB started putting out trailers for Green Lantern and my first thought was "DC/WB FARKS IT UP AGAIN!"


The problem is the Hollywood executives.

Marvel stablished their own studio after the terrible work FOX/SONY had done with their licensed franchises.
DC can't do it since they're owned by WB.

Now, Disney did buy Marvel, but it's still an independently managed operation.
 
2012-05-17 06:58:44 PM

rocky_howard: Rwa2play: rocky_howard: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.

That's the problem: The whole DC movie universe is...Batman. Worse: it's a Batman that had to be rebooted by Nolan after the craptacular direction of Joel Schumacher.

I love DC, really; but it's genuinely disheartening to me as a fan when you have some of the most iconic comic book characters ever in your roster and (other than Nolan's Batman) you can't make a farking decent movie to save your damn life. Meanwhile, your direct competition sticks it's collective neck out and kills it.

It says it all when WB started putting out trailers for Green Lantern and my first thought was "DC/WB FARKS IT UP AGAIN!"

The problem is the Hollywood executives.

Marvel stablished their own studio after the terrible work FOX/SONY had done with their licensed franchises.
DC can't do it since they're owned by WB.

Now, Disney did buy Marvel, but it's still an independently managed operation.


I don't buy that, b/c WB has made a billion dollars by letting Chris Nolan off the leash. The only meddling they even attempted was 3D conversion, and they eventually backed down. The reason DC can't get a good JLA movie is b/c they don't have Avi Arad and Kevin Feige. I know most people (myself included) don't have a lot of respect for producers or management, but those two guys made it happen. They knew when to let the director do what he wanted, when to tweak, when to cut bait (Edward Norton,) and how to make sure each movie/character "felt" like they were all apart of the same universe, even w/ different directors. Right now, WB doesn't seem to have any producers, either from film or the comics business, who seem talented enough or interested enough to pull it off. The animation guys have all the talent, but I don't know if they could put up w/ live action directors. Maybe they have "the guy," but I've seen no evidence that they know where he is. And Disney has more money than WB, so they're going to have a hard time hiring Feige, that's for damn sure.
 
2012-05-17 07:23:59 PM
a.yfrog.com
 
2012-05-17 09:09:04 PM

rocky_howard: Rwa2play: rocky_howard: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.

That's the problem: The whole DC movie universe is...Batman. Worse: it's a Batman that had to be rebooted by Nolan after the craptacular direction of Joel Schumacher.

I love DC, really; but it's genuinely disheartening to me as a fan when you have some of the most iconic comic book characters ever in your roster and (other than Nolan's Batman) you can't make a farking decent movie to save your damn life. Meanwhile, your direct competition sticks it's collective neck out and kills it.

It says it all when WB started putting out trailers for Green Lantern and my first thought was "DC/WB FARKS IT UP AGAIN!"

The problem is the Hollywood executives.

Marvel stablished their own studio after the terrible work FOX/SONY had done with their licensed franchises.
DC can't do it since they're owned by WB.

Now, Disney did buy Marvel, but it's still an independently managed operation.


Pretty much. I guess the only way would be for DC to completely make its studio a separate entity within WB with no interference from the WB execs. Like Warner Independent, DC would have complete control over the direction of whatever project it wants to do. WB's only responsibility/duty is to release it under it's banner.

Of course, fat chance of that happening so long as DC and WB are joined at the hip.
 
2012-05-17 09:13:08 PM

Trocadero: rocky_howard: Rwa2play: rocky_howard: Rwa2play: So while DC dicks around with toasters, Marvel's killing it at the BO with "The Avengers."

Anybody see how bad this looks?

Yeah, it's not as if TDK did a billion dollars four years ago and has a highly expected sequel coming up later this year.

That's the problem: The whole DC movie universe is...Batman. Worse: it's a Batman that had to be rebooted by Nolan after the craptacular direction of Joel Schumacher.

I love DC, really; but it's genuinely disheartening to me as a fan when you have some of the most iconic comic book characters ever in your roster and (other than Nolan's Batman) you can't make a farking decent movie to save your damn life. Meanwhile, your direct competition sticks it's collective neck out and kills it.

It says it all when WB started putting out trailers for Green Lantern and my first thought was "DC/WB FARKS IT UP AGAIN!"

The problem is the Hollywood executives.

Marvel stablished their own studio after the terrible work FOX/SONY had done with their licensed franchises.
DC can't do it since they're owned by WB.

Now, Disney did buy Marvel, but it's still an independently managed operation.

I don't buy that, b/c WB has made a billion dollars by letting Chris Nolan off the leash. The only meddling they even attempted was 3D conversion, and they eventually backed down. The reason DC can't get a good JLA movie is b/c they don't have Avi Arad and Kevin Feige. I know most people (myself included) don't have a lot of respect for producers or management, but those two guys made it happen. They knew when to let the director do what he wanted, when to tweak, when to cut bait (Edward Norton,) and how to make sure each movie/character "felt" like they were all apart of the same universe, even w/ different directors. Right now, WB doesn't seem to have any producers, either from film or the comics business, who seem talented enough or interested enough to pull it off. The animation guys have all the ta ...


How's this for irony (if that's the appropriate expression): WB pulls Bryan Singer away from "X-Men 3" to do "Superman Returns" and it bombs. Marvel gets Josh Whedon to direct "The Avengers" after DC puts the kibosh on Whedon's idea for the Wonder Woman movie, and much money continues to be made.

Don't be suprised if you see another big push during the Memorial Day weekend for "The Avengers."
 
2012-05-17 09:38:55 PM
Alan Moore is

i1.cdnds.net

Sitting on a park bench and eyeing little girls with bad intent
 
2012-05-17 09:39:59 PM

Trocadero: I don't buy that, b/c WB has made a billion dollars by letting Chris Nolan off the leash. The only meddling they even attempted was 3D conversion, and they eventually backed down. The reason DC can't get a good JLA movie is b/c they don't have Avi Arad and Kevin Feige. I know most people (myself included) don't have a lot of respect for producers or management, but those two guys made it happen. They knew when to let the director do what he wanted, when to tweak, when to cut bait (Edward Norton,) and how to make sure each movie/character "felt" like they were all apart of the same universe, even w/ different directors. Right now, WB doesn't seem to have any producers, either from film or the comics business, who seem talented enough or interested enough to pull it off. The animation guys have all the talent, but I don't know if they could put up w/ live action directors. Maybe they have "the guy," but I've seen no evidence that they know where he is. And Disney has more money than WB, so they're going to have a hard time hiring Feige, that's for damn sure.


I know. In a review for a local paper, I praised and thanked Kevin Feige for everything he has done and because without him we wouldn't have anything.

Avi Arad is bleh, he's just a bean counter jew. He's been involved with everything Marvel from the 90s cartoons to the current movies. He's been involved with a lot of crap. He's just there to sign the money.

But it still testament that Marvel's independence is the big factor here. Also, Disney having "more" money than WB is kind of irrelevant. It's not as if they're going to pay Feige billions of dollars or as if WB couldn't muster up and cover any offer Disney makes to him.
 
2012-05-17 09:41:27 PM
Trocadero:

Oh, and WB let Nolan off just because he has marbles of steel and told them off.
 
2012-05-17 10:21:03 PM
They seem to be glossing over the fact that it puts a rorschach image on your toast too. Like this one.

cdn.blisstree.com
 
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