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(Townhall)   Obama needs one more justice. If elected, he will get it, and same-sex marriage will be forced on all of America   (townhall.com) divider line 286
    More: Scary, obama, human beings, cultural conservative, culture war, Antietam, Battle of Antietam, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Justice Stephen Breyer  
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2472 clicks; posted to Politics » on 11 May 2012 at 10:36 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-11 11:29:25 AM
So who is ptedicted to reire?
 
2012-05-11 11:30:26 AM
retire*

Stoopid fone
 
2012-05-11 11:31:07 AM
If I have to get gay married, I call the actor that plays Lancel Lannister in GoT, that is one pretty mother farker.
 
2012-05-11 11:31:24 AM
Ok so this means we will have Zac Efron being forced to marry Taylor Lautner to create beautiful alpaca muscle children. Similarly Chris Hemsworth and Chris Evans will be forced to marry and through gay sex produce a superpatriotic demigod who wields a hammer.

I'm not sure who Tom Hiddleston is going to be forced to marry. The guy who played magneto most recently?
 
2012-05-11 11:31:24 AM
I hope we get a random lottery of who we have to same-sex marry. That would be kinda exciting and interesting.
 
2012-05-11 11:33:00 AM
Also, I feel bad for whomever I must gay marry, I have a really sensitive gag reflex. Though I guess some guys are into that.
 
2012-05-11 11:33:48 AM
Forced gay marriage? Why couldn't I have been born a woman dammit!!!!
 
2012-05-11 11:35:14 AM

Lando Lincoln: I hope we get a random lottery of who we have to same-sex marry. That would be kinda exciting and interesting.


You could wind up with an internet dentist. Still excited?
 
2012-05-11 11:36:13 AM

GhostFish: Lando Lincoln: I hope we get a random lottery of who we have to same-sex marry. That would be kinda exciting and interesting.

You could wind up with an internet dentist. Still excited?


or worse yet, Pat Buchanan.
 
2012-05-11 11:36:16 AM

SilentStrider: I hope the guy I'm gay married to is a good cook,


I hope the guy I'm mandated to gay marry has the same clothing sizes as me so I can double my wardrobe.
 
2012-05-11 11:39:59 AM
"All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws."
 
2012-05-11 11:40:09 AM

Need Help Soonish: YaY!

Im gonna gay marry Joan Jett!!!

///leave me my dreams ok?


Hey, back off. I was here first.
 
2012-05-11 11:42:17 AM

FreakyBunny: Some churches got uppity, but the Supreme Court explicitly stated that they may refuse to perform gay marriages on religious grounds.


Which would be the ruling here 9-0 if that somehow ever made it to our Supreme Court too. Churches are under no threat from gay marriage.

As for getting "one more justice" the most likely one to go is a liberal justice (Ginsburg, who has had some health problems). Maybe Kennedy, but I doubt that. Scalia's staying for life (he loves the job and the power), and none of Thomas, Alito or Roberts are older than 65, so they'll be there a long while.
 
2012-05-11 11:43:20 AM

GhostFish: Lando Lincoln: I hope we get a random lottery of who we have to same-sex marry. That would be kinda exciting and interesting.

You could wind up with an internet dentist. Still excited?


It would make for an interesting sitcom.
 
2012-05-11 11:43:54 AM
Imma get gay married at planned parenthood
 
2012-05-11 11:44:15 AM
I for one welcome our new same-sex marriage overlords.
 
2012-05-11 11:45:59 AM
cinemagia.files.wordpress.com

images.starpulse.com

allieiswired.com
 
2012-05-11 11:48:11 AM
How dare he impose what the majority of Americans agree with. What is he trying to do, turn the US into a democracy?
 
2012-05-11 11:49:15 AM

dervish16108: SilentStrider: I hope the guy I'm gay married to is a good cook,

I hope the guy I'm mandated to gay marry has the same clothing sizes as me so I can double my wardrobe.


You will be mandated to marry a man, not necessarily a gay man. Your fashion options may not be that impressive.
 
2012-05-11 11:50:17 AM

whosits_112: unyon: SilentStrider: unyon: SilentStrider: I hope the guy I'm gay married to is a good cook,

They're all good cooks. In fact, once you're gay married, you'll become a good cook too. But be prepared to have to update your wardrobe.

Well, if I must. I hope I can still wear jeans at least.


You can, but they'll be more ball-crunchingly tight than you might prefer. You'll get used to them, though.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 287x400]
SilentStrider's New Pants


Lol.
 
2012-05-11 11:50:55 AM

FreakyBunny: Subby, I hope you are some kind of meta troll. If so, 4/10. If not, I hear the Westboro "Baptist Church" is looking for new members.

Why is America seen as this bastion of liberty for all the world to gaze upon with hope and aspiration when so many in your country are actively involved in trying suppress an out-group's pursuit of marriage equality? That's right, it's not. Your country looks like a sad joke to the majority of Canadians when it comes to this. How can Canada and the US be so alike in so many ways when you are so backward when it comes to this issue?

Explain to me how that would threaten the institution of marriage any more than drive in wedding chapels and celebrity serial marriages?

What is it to you if two women or two men get married to each other? How are you harmed? I guess you are afraid to find out, so you and the other bigots like you enjoy making your preemptive strikes against an oppressed group that is hated for no more than whom they love.

/Christian.
//Canadian.
///Proud we sorted this out years ago up here.


I agree with this, although I will note that Canadians buy milk in bags, which is farked up.
 
2012-05-11 11:51:16 AM

mrshowrules: dervish16108: SilentStrider: I hope the guy I'm gay married to is a good cook,

I hope the guy I'm mandated to gay marry has the same clothing sizes as me so I can double my wardrobe.

You will be mandated to marry a man, not necessarily a gay man. Your fashion options may not be that impressive.


Oh tough break.
 
2012-05-11 11:51:52 AM

Shaggy_C: Splinshints: I mean, c'mon. You write a book whining about the state of the American media and how it's just a stupid dog and pony show feeding people crap because it's what makes money, then you turn your website into exactly what your book lambasted. I know Fark isn't supposed to be the media, but, like the Daily Show, whether it likes it or not it is positioned in a way that makes it possible to be both a source of humor AND substantive discussion at the same time.

Elections are not about who has the better ideas. Understand that and realize why we never talk about policy positions here. All there is to talk about is "my team versus your team". You're attacking this site for something endemic in the entire democratic system. If I were you I would apologize, we should be so lucky to have such a wonderful forum upon which to express our opinions. I am very thankful to Drew and the entire Fark staff and never take it for granted.


Notsureifserious.jpg

/He is a sellout whore when it comes to fark but he still won't have sex with you.
//unless you're a paying customer...but no kissing on the mouth
 
2012-05-11 11:52:25 AM

Aarontology: Vodka Zombie: What exactly IS being forced on America?

That sickening UnAmerican notion of "equal rights for all"

It's a shame really, to see freedom be imposed upon America.


You have to admit that the U.S. hasn't been the same since the abolition of slavery was forced on all of us.
 
2012-05-11 11:53:02 AM

YoungSwedishBlonde: Forced gay marriage? I got dibs on Anthony Bourdain.


Dammit! He was my first choice.

Fine, I have dibs on Will Wheaton.... and if someone has already called him... I guess dibs on Drew.

/Grumble grumble... stupid forced gay marriage.
 
2012-05-11 11:53:07 AM
It was about time. The gays should be as miserable as the rest of us.

/I call dibs on Mila Kunis
 
2012-05-11 11:54:53 AM

namegoeshere: Does it have to be an American forced upon me, or can I pick a furriner?

'Cause I kind of have a girl crush on Emma Watson.


If she doesn't want to marry you, we could give her a seat on the court - Hell, the average teenage girl makes better decisions than most of those idiots.
 
2012-05-11 11:55:58 AM

someonelse: Need Help Soonish: YaY!

Im gonna gay marry Joan Jett!!!

///leave me my dreams ok?

Hey, back off. I was here first.


Look, I tell you what... I'll mud wrestle you for her.

That's fair, yes?
 
2012-05-11 11:57:27 AM
I came into this thread expecting Magic Johnson to be taken. Looks like im still in luck!
 
2012-05-11 11:57:37 AM

Aarontology: Vodka Zombie: What exactly IS being forced on America?

That sickening UnAmerican notion of "equal rights for all"

It's a shame really, to see freedom be imposed upon America.


Well, you know, this will be a huge national security issue. Imposing these freedoms will only make the terrorists hate us more and attack us again. This will completely undo all of the goodwill we've gained with the terrorists by restricting freedoms thus far. It's going to be hell; it'll be 9-11 happening every day!

I guess Fartbongo really does want the terrorists to win. :(
 
2012-05-11 12:01:24 PM
I'll marry Grace Jones or David Bowie. I figure I'll be safe either way the court rules.
 
2012-05-11 12:03:29 PM

INeedAName: FloydA: namegoeshere: FloydA: namegoeshere: Does it have to be an American forced upon me, or can I pick a furriner?

'Cause I kind of have a girl crush on Emma Watson.

I would gladly gay marry you.

Awww.. thanks! Can we still bring Emma along as our love slave?

Teh Bible is full of slaves so it's all good.

Oh yeah, most definitely, as long as I get to bring Johnny Depp- plus he has to wear the Captain Jack Sparrow costume.

That's acceptable. But you must also take Michael Bolton, so he can sing this the whole time.


I hadn't seen that before, and now I can't stop laughing.
 
2012-05-11 12:04:00 PM
good. you know.. pursuit of happiness and all that.
// there is nothing more unamerican than being against gay marriage.
 
2012-05-11 12:07:16 PM

Ayn Rand's Cervix: I came into this thread expecting Magic Johnson to be taken.


Oh it will be. It will be...
 
2012-05-11 12:08:19 PM
Same sex marriage only affects the two people getting married, modmitter.

But somehow weak, spineless liberals are destroying the country.
 
2012-05-11 12:11:20 PM
I'm going to lay claim to Nick Saban. I'll be at all the games!

Roll Tide!
 
2012-05-11 12:11:32 PM
Y'know what would be funny?

If Obama nominated Judge John Jones to the Supreme Court.

John Jones, appointed to the Middle District of Pennsylvania by George W. Bush. Good friends with Tom Ridge et al.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute counted on to rule in their favor (i.e. IE) in the Kitzmiller v Dover trial, no matter what their conduct.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute railed as an "activist" judge after he ruled to their detriment in Kitzmiller, because of their conduct.

Sure, he's a conservative, but he's also someone who can put his own politics behind him to make an honest judgment on a case. Exactly someone who deserves to be a Supreme Court Justice.
 
2012-05-11 12:13:28 PM
Woot! Go, Obama, go!
 
2012-05-11 12:14:15 PM
Not that this is exactly relevant to the thread, but I heard a story on NPR yesterday about a radio talk show host in Liverpool who realized he was gay when he was 12 years old, in the mid-1960s. After a few years of denial, his mother finally took him to a psychiatrist who claimed to be able to cure homosexuality through "aversion therapy." For 72 hours, the guy was tortured in the most disgusting imaginable ways. Eventually, the young man realized that he was there voluntarily (he was doing it for his mom's benefit) and was free to leave despite considerable pressure to stay, so he got out. Some time later, he ran into that psychiatrist at an underground gay bar in London.

The whole story was one of the most horrifying things I've ever heard in my life.
 
2012-05-11 12:14:45 PM

IlGreven: Y'know what would be funny?

If Obama nominated Judge John Jones to the Supreme Court.

John Jones, appointed to the Middle District of Pennsylvania by George W. Bush. Good friends with Tom Ridge et al.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute counted on to rule in their favor (i.e. IE) in the Kitzmiller v Dover trial, no matter what their conduct.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute railed as an "activist" judge after he ruled to their detriment in Kitzmiller, because of their conduct.

Sure, he's a conservative, but he's also someone who can put his own politics behind him to make an honest judgment on a case. Exactly someone who deserves to be a Supreme Court Justice.



NO. No self-proclaimed conservative deserves to be a SCJ until the GOP takes their party back from the tards.
 
2012-05-11 12:15:29 PM

Splinshints: Are there not legitimate, intelligent conservative sources of opinion anymore? Has George Will been abducted by aliens? Or do Fark modmins just really like making conservatives look insanely stupid, as if they needed the help?

Because I really don't understand why this kind of crap keeps getting submitted and greenlit. It's always crap. Townhall. WingNutDaily. Breitbart. Limbaugh. Hot Air. Aside from the occasional LGF link (LFG's sanity being a relatively recent thing), it just seems like pretty much everything that's a conservative opinion piece on Fark is completely nuts.


I've wondered about this myself. The right has gone so far off the edge that even Ronald Regan couldn't pass their litmus test any more. Whatever happened to conservatives like William Buckley Jr? His son posted that he would have to vote for Obama last election, given that McCain put Palin on the ticket as VP.

I used to consider myself a moderate Republican. I haven't changed any of my positions, but given the current political climate, I am now a liberal Democrat. I'm pretty sure the same thing happened to LGF.
 
2012-05-11 12:17:31 PM

GhostFish: DeaH: I wonder if there really are people out there who think they will be forced to gay marry? I know one of my co-workers is gay, and no one is forcing me to gay-tech-write.

No. But some of them do think that this will all lead to more people "choosing" to be gay. And that is an important, underlying fact in all of this nonsense.

Many of these people still firmly believe that being gay is a choice. They believe that homosexuals choose a harder life, because they have been lead astray by Satan.

And they think that government recognition and protection of same-sex marriage will lead to more people being tempted into a life of sin.

They are morons, and they are dragging us all down to their level because they have been allowed to live in ignorance.


To a certain extent, they are correct. If being gay were culturally accepted, if gay people could marry and have families, and be just other members of the community, would Marcus Bachmann have married Michelle? I don't think so. And imagine how much better the world would be if they had never married. Marcus could have focused on really helping teens rather than warping them with conversion therapy. Imagine if Michelle actually had a husband who was able to fully love and desire her. Would she have so much suppressed rage?

I am certain that more than a few evangelicals know someone who "would be gay" if it were not for the social and legal stigma. Of course, the real irony is that those people are gay. They would just be less miserable - and make those around them less miserable - if it were not for the social and legal stigma.
 
2012-05-11 12:17:49 PM

DamnYankees: Pat Buchanan comparing this to Antietam? I'm confused, he thinks being compared to the Confederacy is a good thing?


For those who don't get the Antietam reference - that battle was the single bloodiest day in American history. 23,000 casualties in one day.
 
2012-05-11 12:18:27 PM
About friggin' time.

Claiming this is being "forced on America" is like claiming desegregation was "forced on America" - yes, you will have to drag bigots and morons, kicking and screaming, out of their own ignorance. That's just how it works.
 
2012-05-11 12:18:35 PM

IlGreven: Y'know what would be funny?

If Obama nominated Judge John Jones to the Supreme Court.

John Jones, appointed to the Middle District of Pennsylvania by George W. Bush. Good friends with Tom Ridge et al.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute counted on to rule in their favor (i.e. IE) in the Kitzmiller v Dover trial, no matter what their conduct.

Jones, who the Discovery Institute railed as an "activist" judge after he ruled to their detriment in Kitzmiller, because of their conduct.

Sure, he's a conservative, but he's also someone who can put his own politics behind him to make an honest judgment on a case. Exactly someone who deserves to be a Supreme Court Justice.


Plus his whole career as a Martian Manhunter can't hurt.
 
2012-05-11 12:18:55 PM

GhostFish: Don't be so sure. A lot of gay guys are as disgusting and filthy as any bachelor, but with the added bonus of owning more clothes that stay on the ground and more products that clutter the bathroom.


We don't even get to choose our mate? This is a bit of an overcorrection.
 
2012-05-11 12:19:29 PM
Dibs on Lady Gaga.
 
2012-05-11 12:20:07 PM

EnviroDude: DamnYankees: Pat Buchanan comparing this to Antietam? I'm confused, he thinks being compared to the Confederacy is a good thing?

For those who don't get the Antietam reference - that battle was the single bloodiest day in American history. 23,000 casualties in one day.


A day in which the side that was fighting to deny freedom to others was defeated.
 
2012-05-11 12:20:26 PM

kronicfeld: I'ma polygamarry Paul Rudd and Ryan Gosling.


I keep forgetting how teh ghey works. I wanted to challenge you for the right to polygamarry Paul Rudd and Ryan Gosling . . . but I'm a woman. . . sooooo . . . . I call dibs on

encrypted-tbn1.google.com
 
2012-05-11 12:28:46 PM
Well if this is going to happen, I call dibs on Chris Hemsworth before anyone else in the thread. I've always wanted a hottie Aussie, and if I'm not allowed to have a chick and Hugh Jackman is already gay-married, goddamnit Chris, you're mine!
 
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