MFL: I know the media and democrats need to emphasize social issues because they got nothing else to work with, but it's starting to get so predictable it's stupid.

Obama will lose because the economy sucks. The rest of this crap is just noise.

That budget the House passed isn't going to survive the Senate. Does that make you sad?
/fark compromise,these farkers don't want it.

Lenny_da_Hog: (I'm pretty sure it went something like this yesterday afternoon:)

(Ke$sha ringtone....)
"Hello, this is Bristol!"

"Hiii, Bristol, this is Suzanne, your publicity manager's assistant?"

"Hi, Suzanne!"

"How are you dear -- look, we just wanted you to issue a statement on the gay marriage issue on your Facebook or Twitter today. We'll e-mail you some copy. It's important to your Reality Show demographic for you to stay trendy."

"What gay marriage issue?"

"Well, the President today said... Look don't worry. We'll explain it all in the e-mail. Just make sure you send it out before Thursday."

"Okay, Suzanne! Thanks, Suzanne!"

"Bye, dear."

I'm surprised she remembered to remove all the "FW:"s from the original.

It's amazing that she can take the dick out of her mouth long enough to say anything.

MFL: I know the media and democrats need to emphasize social issues because they got nothing else to work with, but it's starting to get so predictable it's stupid.

Obama will lose because the economy sucks. The rest of this crap is just noise.

Yeah how dare those Democrats putting a referendum banning gay marriage and civil unions on the North Carolina ballot!

jst3p: lockers: rynthetyn: Wait, why is anybody even reporting on Bristol Palin's opinion to begin with?

who? I thought this thread was about not objectifying strippers and not using certain naughty words that Theaetetus finds icky. There was an article were supposed to be discussing?

Yeah there is. Apparently some coont said something hypocritical.

What the hell does that have to do with objectifying strippers? Some farker decided to up and air their sandy vag? Man, we farkers sure have an axe to grind.

Theaetetus: What we shouldn't do is call her a coont or a biatch who needs to shut her whore mouth. Because you know what that would make us when we criticize the GOP? Hypocrites.

How about "farking goddamn moronic piece of shiat"? Is that okay? I don't hate her because she's a woman, I hate her because SHE'S A GODDAMN MORONIC PIECE OF shiat.

Earpj: lockers:

That put's your 13 year old in the 99 percentile. Yeah, it's odd.

Ok. If you say so. Grandpa was 6'4". My 18 yr old son is 5'7". Grandma was 5'3".
Genetics can go either way.

Yes. I am living proof of that. I'm short, and the shortest one in my family. The next shortest person is my brother, at 5'10", and my cousin Zach is "only" 5'11". Everyone else is literally over 6', and many are in the 6'4" range. Those farking recessive Portuguese genes killed those tall Celtic genes everyone else in my family enjoys.

/perhaps "enjoys" is the wrong word

James F. Campbell: Theaetetus: What we shouldn't do is call her a coont or a biatch who needs to shut her whore mouth. Because you know what that would make us when we criticize the GOP? Hypocrites.

How about "farking goddamn moronic piece of shiat"? Is that okay? I don't hate her because she's a woman, I hate her because SHE'S A GODDAMN MORONIC PIECE OF shiat.

Yes! That's the whole point of what Theaetetus is saying! Don't use words that mock her for being a "dumb woman," use words that mock her for being just plain "dumb."

Yes, it is true Bristol represents all Republicans. In fact, she is co-authoring, along with Ted Nugent, the official GOP platform this year.

Her views are important and significant in the lives of all Americans.

Don't you dare unfriend her.

oldfarthenry: alywa: This is going to be a long summer, libs. Be warned. We won't be silenced.

Thus began "The Summer of Derp"TM

Does anyone know how to make popcorn on a gas grill?

Remove the grate and heat shield. Turn one burner up to high. put one cup of popcorn into a deep metal bowl with 3 tablespoons of a high-smoke-point, neutral oil (vegetable, canola) or popcorn popping medium (it's sometimes a solid like shortening or sometimes a butter-flavored oil, and is available from most Mega-Marts) and two heavy pinches of fine-grain pickling or popcorn salt, or just table salt in a pinch.

Cover bowl with tin foil, poke one or two holes with a skewer or paring knife to vent steam. Hold it over the flame, shuffling it constantly to prevent hot-spots. When you hear popping start keep it moving for 2-3 minutes - the constant motion will keep the oil and unpopped kernels down at the bottom near the heat, while shuffling the popped kernels toward the top and sides of the bowl to prevent burning. Continue until pops become infrequent. Be conservative: better some old maids in the bottom then burn popcorn. Be careful when removing the foil, steam will be there even with the vents. Eat right out of the bowl once it cools. Popping with real oil means you won't want butter - it'll taste good enough on its own.

Serving options: While it cools for a moment, in a second bowl, melt some butter and toss on some fresh herbs (thyme, parsley would be nice) and then cover in butter. Return the foil and shake again to coat. Alternatively, mix in a box of your favorite movie-time candy - Reeses Pieces, Junior Mints, something like that for a real movie-night feel.

jvl: James F. Campbell: Theaetetus: What we shouldn't do is call her a coont or a biatch who needs to shut her whore mouth. Because you know what that would make us when we criticize the GOP? Hypocrites.

How about "farking goddamn moronic piece of shiat"? Is that okay? I don't hate her because she's a woman, I hate her because SHE'S A GODDAMN MORONIC PIECE OF shiat.

Yes! That's the whole point of what Theaetetus is saying! Don't use words that mock her for being a "dumb woman," use words that mock her for being just plain "dumb."

If when I say "She's a dumb coont" you think that I imply all women are dumb or coonts, then you are probably a dumb coont.

rynthetyn: Wait, why is anybody even reporting on Bristol Palin's opinion to begin with?

This. Right here. This is the real issue.

oh, I didn't say it, so i'll have to be clear: hold it with a pair of tongs or you'll burn yourself.

Here's God of Cookery Alton Brown with a visual how-to on the above method:

http://youtu.be/SPBIeF4dbmk

Phone posting now, so quoting is impossible.

ph0rk - Tallow Golem is only new in that "tallow" has been added. A golem is a clay creature that does its masters bidding with no agency of its own. Tallow golem is well...a meat golem. Those that spew talking points with no modicum of critical thought.

To me, these sorts of insults are MORE powerful than the gendered equivalent of "doodiehead." Our opinions may differ and that's cool. I don't get offended, its just bewildering to see gendered pejoratives. Men suffer just as much, albeit in different ways.

Theatatus - I hope you weren't being sarcastic about "mooncalf" because I think its great.

illegal.tender:
[southerngospelyankee.files.wordpress.com image 480x480]

Wouldn't that be a wonderful world to live in?



What are you waiting for then? Get crackin'!

Richelieu: rynthetyn: Wait, why is anybody even reporting on Bristol Palin's opinion to begin with?

This. Right here. This is the real issue.

The thread got 364 comments and 2445 clicks, that is why. People want to talk about her and her family. I don't get it, but then again I am here.

Mike Chewbacca: Earpj: lockers:

That put's your 13 year old in the 99 percentile. Yeah, it's odd.

Ok. If you say so. Grandpa was 6'4". My 18 yr old son is 5'7". Grandma was 5'3".
Genetics can go either way.

Yes. I am living proof of that. I'm short, and the shortest one in my family. The next shortest person is my brother, at 5'10", and my cousin Zach is "only" 5'11". Everyone else is literally over 6', and many are in the 6'4" range. Those farking recessive Portuguese genes killed those tall Celtic genes everyone else in my family enjoys.

/perhaps "enjoys" is the wrong word

Pfft. Of course it is. Tall people are naturally superior people, cultural indoctrination has taught me that.

Oh, GOP. Jesus must be so proud of you.

jst3p: If when I say "She's a dumb coont" you think that I imply all women are dumb or coonts, then you are probably a dumb coont.

I know, right? It's like the other day, this gay guy I know said something stupid, and told him he was a dumb f*ggot. He thought that meant I had a problem with gay people, proving what a dumb f*ggot he was!

someonelse: No. There are more than enough actual adulterous Republicans who have lectured us about the sanctity of marriage. Bristol is merely the sprinkles on the hypocrisy frosting that tops the giant GOP sh*t cake.

GAY adulterous republicans. You forgot gay. If hypocrisy was an airplane the GOP has examples that are airports.

Pants full of macaroni!!: illegal.tender:
[southerngospelyankee.files.wordpress.com image 480x480]

Wouldn't that be a wonderful world to live in?

[img.photobucket.com image 480x320]

What are you waiting for then? Get crackin'!

That guy was awesome because he shot up a liberal church 'cause he hated liberals and was mad that the liberals were ending his food stamps. If there's one thing I hate liberals for, it's for ending food stamp programs.

someonelse: Cletus C.: Yes, it is true Bristol represents all Republicans.

No. There are more than enough actual adulterous Republicans who have lectured us about the sanctity of marriage. Bristol is merely the sprinkles on the hypocrisy frosting that tops the giant GOP sh*t cake.

Uh, didn't you just repeat what I said, only with some high falutin' liberal speak?

Mike Chewbacca: Earpj: lockers:

That put's your 13 year old in the 99 percentile. Yeah, it's odd.

Ok. If you say so. Grandpa was 6'4". My 18 yr old son is 5'7". Grandma was 5'3".
Genetics can go either way.

Yes. I am living proof of that. I'm short, and the shortest one in my family. The next shortest person is my brother, at 5'10", and my cousin Zach is "only" 5'11". Everyone else is literally over 6', and many are in the 6'4" range. Those farking recessive Portuguese genes killed those tall Celtic genes everyone else in my family enjoys.

/perhaps "enjoys" is the wrong word

Ahahahah my mom is 5'0" and I'm 5'3" but my sister is 5'10". Ain't it funny how genes work?

Pants full of macaroni!!: illegal.tender:
[southerngospelyankee.files.wordpress.com image 480x480]

Wouldn't that be a wonderful world to live in?

[img.photobucket.com image 480x320]

What are you waiting for then? Get crackin'!

Adkisson was stupid. First you get the cops, courts, and military on your side. Then? Freedom.

quatchi: /Next Farker that tries to esplain how she's "off limits" after all this gets a slap.

She's off limits because it's not fair to insult the developmentally disabled.

rcantley: jst3p: If when I say "She's a dumb coont" you think that I imply all women are dumb or coonts, then you are probably a dumb coont.

I know, right? It's like the other day, this gay guy I know said something stupid, and told him he was a dumb f*ggot. He thought that meant I had a problem with gay people, proving what a dumb f*ggot he was!

That is a completely invalid comparison and you should feel bad.

jst3p: rcantley: jst3p: If when I say "She's a dumb coont" you think that I imply all women are dumb or coonts, then you are probably a dumb coont.

I know, right? It's like the other day, this gay guy I know said something stupid, and told him he was a dumb f*ggot. He thought that meant I had a problem with gay people, proving what a dumb f*ggot he was!

That is a completely invalid comparison and you should feel bad.

Only a coont would throw out that sort of biatchy comparison. rcantley needs to shut his whore mouth.

I skipped a bunch of pages.

Did anyone figure out what's wrong with the eagle yet?

Philip Francis Queeg: While he was at it, should he have mentioned that by same same thinking of thousands of years about marriage, Bristol Palin, while no doubt a lovely person, is a shameless hussy raising a bastard child both of whom who should be shunned at best by all of decent society?

I have to say, I do appreciate Game of Thrones for putting the word bastard back into the lexicon as something other than a mild profanity.

Bristol Palin is the mother of a bastard.

Only in American can a happily married father of two well adjusted children be lectured on the "sanctity of marriage" by:

1. A thrice divorced right-wing radio host
2. A presidential candidate who is the grandson of a polygamist
3. An unwed single teenage mother

Seriously GOP, this is why people laugh at you.

jst3p: If when I say "She's a dumb coont" you think that I imply all women are dumb or coonts, then you are probably a dumb coont.

No, I think it implies that you are simply ignorant of how broadly offensive that is to broads. File under "you're not helping."

jjmartin: I skipped a bunch of pages.

Did anyone figure out what's wrong with the eagle yet?

You mean why it's crying urine?

jst3p: Apparently some coont said something hypocritical.

Not coont -- twunt.

propasaurus: FirstNationalBastard: Jake Havechek: Now she's going to complain and whine when people lambaste her every time she spouts stupid crap like this.

YOU can't even handle the "thousands of years of tradition" when you decided to birth your bastard, Bristol, any advice you have for anybody isn't worth a pint of cold piss.

She's only the daughter of someone famous! She didn't ask for media attention! Now,watch as she whores herself out to the media for attention!

She's not the only daughter, just the only one who got knocked up as a teenager.
So far.

Do you lack reading comprehension, or do you have some odd form of dyslexia that affects word order rather than letter order?

JPINFV: quatchi: /Next Farker that tries to esplain how she's "off limits" after all this gets a slap.

She's off limits because it's not fair to insult the developmentally disabled.

Hmmm, Bristol's too fat for FAS so I'll assume the disability of which you speak had something to do with her mom snorting huge rails of cocaine offa oil drums back in her wild-oat-sowing, NBA bball player banging wombshifter years. But yeah, yer right, I never knew that before. Insult taken back.

*blink*

jules_siegel: jst3p: Apparently some coont said something hypocritical.

Not coont -- twunt.

CSB:

The spouse and I do the "combine the first names of a couple we know" thing for unmarried friends. For example, Gary Jones and Amy Smith would become "Gamy" because they're not married and we can't call them the Joneses. Anyway, my sister in law is a twunt. My brother's name is Shawn. So their name is "Shunt." (Obviously, we came up with this before they got married. But it's weird to refer to them as the [Ourlastnames] so we still call them Shunt, just not to their faces.)

In this situation, it was the other way around. I guess we can be glad that Malia and Sasha aren't younger, or perhaps today's press conference might have been about appointing Dora the Explorer as Attorney General because of her success in stopping Swiper the Fox.

Isn't she a little old to be able to namedrop Dora characters so easily?

So someone who gets knocked up behind a muffler shop in Wasilla can critisize the president's parenting skills and have the media take her seriously? I weep for this nation.

Blathering Idjut: In this situation, it was the other way around. I guess we can be glad that Malia and Sasha aren't younger, or perhaps today's press conference might have been about appointing Dora the Explorer as Attorney General because of her success in stopping Swiper the Fox.

Isn't she a little old to be able to namedrop Dora characters so easily?

She probably knows the show because she watches it with her bastard.

spiderpaz: If I need tips on how to get knocked up by a teenage hillbilly in a Chevy Blazer, I'll seek Bristol's opinion. Other than that she shouldn't bother to spit the dick out of her mouth to speak to the other adults.

She should have held out for a guy that would've knocked her up in a Toyota Highlander: the heated seats are standard.

quatchi: JPINFV: quatchi: /Next Farker that tries to esplain how she's "off limits" after all this gets a slap.

She's off limits because it's not fair to insult the developmentally disabled.

Hmmm, Bristol's too fat for FAS so I'll assume the disability of which you speak had something to do with her mom snorting huge rails of cocaine offa oil drums back in her wild-oat-sowing, NBA bball player banging wombshifter years. But yeah, yer right, I never knew that before. Insult taken back.

*blink*

I probably should have put intellectually disabled instead of developmentally, to be honest. However I do agree that the normal prohibition of going after children for no better reason than their parents doesn't apply when, as in this case, the child chooses to insert themselves into the discussion.

Of course I also use Bristol Palin to remind myself of the name of the Bristol Stool Scale.

Mr.Tangent: illegal.tender:
Wouldn't that be a wonderful world to live in?

In a world without liberals the center leaning conservatives would be the new liberals and the frothing at the mouth herpadurp conservatives would be the new conservatives.

same thing just adjust for the new spectrum of crazy, it's an infinite cycle.

I've had enough of everyone putting bristol and her fam on their enemies list. All she did was state some facts and everyone acted like she was committing war crimes. Just when you think the left has finally gone quiet they pick on her again, unleash the dogs of war and have themselves a good day trashing the one family who's ladies are brave enough to stand out in the cold and say the things all the undecideds are thinking. I don't know what the beef is between the crackpots and these women. It's time that the palin's loyal soldiers take on these college kids with their own talking points to make sure they get shutdown. game on. I challenge all libs to spend 20 hours in LA and not come to a new understanding of how gross same sex marriage truly is. when you're crooning the supremes with isaac and ihsmael looking like something out of bowie's life on mars, you'll realize there's no exit from this lifestyle, and you'll be begging to join team bristol.

RedEyedWings: I've had enough of everyone putting bristol and her fam on their enemies list. All she did was state some facts and everyone acted like she was committing war crimes. Just when you think the left has finally gone quiet they pick on her again, unleash the dogs of war and have themselves a good day trashing the one family who's ladies are brave enough to stand out in the cold and say the things all the undecideds are thinking. I don't know what the beef is between the crackpots and these women. It's time that the palin's loyal soldiers take on these college kids with their own talking points to make sure they get shutdown. game on. I challenge all libs to spend 20 hours in LA and not come to a new understanding of how gross same sex marriage truly is. when you're crooning the supremes with isaac and ihsmael looking like something out of bowie's life on mars, you'll realize there's no exit from this lifestyle, and you'll be begging to join team bristol.

You, sir, are no StopArrestingMe.