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(Fark)   If The Avengers were real, how would you react if they came to your town?   (fark.com ) divider line
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3489 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 May 2012 at 3:37 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-08 04:34:41 PM  
Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.
 
2012-05-08 04:35:02 PM  
I'd get Captain America to sign my vintage trading cards.
I have the whole set, near mint condition!

/Really Farkers, 100 comments in and I'm the first one to do this?
//Coulson is alive and Fury is hiding him; this I will believe until proven otherwise.
 
2012-05-08 04:36:15 PM  
I'd call my insurance agent to make sure my policies are up to date, then leave town.

Run around the house with a camera taking pictures of EVERYTHING to have proof of ownership to show the insurance company first.
 
2012-05-08 04:36:33 PM  
I would immediately start trying to get laid by Tony Stark, Steve Rogers and Thor. I'd do them separately. I'd do them all at once--you know, whatever they are into (though I don't think Captain America would be down for a threesome).
 
2012-05-08 04:38:09 PM  
i.imgur.com

God-fearing Americans wouldn't stand for them.

Because AMERICA!
 
2012-05-08 04:38:37 PM  
Oops, I meant foursome.

/what I'm trying to say is that I would fark all of them
 
2012-05-08 04:39:23 PM  
Start looking for real estate in a more peaceful state
 
2012-05-08 04:39:31 PM  
Dude, GET THE fark OUT!

The Avengers showing up is like Jim Cantore times eleventy brazillian, and my home owner's insurance doesn't cover the unbridled fury of eleventy brazillion Jim Cantores.
 
2012-05-08 04:43:43 PM  
i.imgur.com

NO THOR IN MY CITY UNLESS HE ADMITS GOD IS GOD!"
 
2012-05-08 04:45:56 PM  
As I actually work and live in an area that regularly gets pulverized in the movies I'd poop my pants. However, the President lives here so it just might be a cute little photo-op in front of the Pentagon too or at the Rose Garden.
 
2012-05-08 04:48:23 PM  
Take Thor to the local Church.
 
2012-05-08 04:59:31 PM  
I'd take them all out for drinks and be the designated driver.


/Hulk smashed!
 
2012-05-08 05:05:28 PM  
Grab my M-4 and take cover. If I survive, ask Black Widow if she plays backgammon.
 
2012-05-08 05:05:39 PM  

thejoyofpi: I would be extremely scared. They only seem to go to places where there's trouble.


I'd have the same reaction as though Jim Cantore showed up in my town.

I'd find a new town.
 
2012-05-08 05:21:49 PM  

Gunny Highway: Call these guys:

[whatculture.com image 570x378]


Is it just me, or does Wee Hughie look like Simon Pegg?
 
2012-05-08 05:22:26 PM  

Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.


I got The Dark Knight Rises and Prometheus, but no Hobbit. Would much rather have seen the trailer for the Hobbit than Frankenweenie.

/off to Google!
 
2012-05-08 05:23:55 PM  
Are we under alien invasion?
No?
www.colourbox.com
GET THE fark OUT OF MY TOWN YOU WALKING TIME BOMBS!

Shoot cap or tony with his mask down in the face, dont even bother resisting arrest and just hope somebody else gets them running out of town before they destroy the place.
 
2012-05-08 05:25:16 PM  
I would be worried about this ...


208.116.9.205
 
2012-05-08 05:33:25 PM  

Ceiling Moran: Simon Pegg


They designed his character with Pegg in mind and I am pretty sure Pegg wrote the intro to The Boys Vol. 1
 
2012-05-08 05:37:36 PM  

Lone Stranger: I would be worried about this ...


[208.116.9.205 image 467x700]


Dayum. Hulk need more fiber.
 
2012-05-08 05:39:45 PM  
Most of these plans involve sex with black widow and running for your life.

I have always felt at home here.
 
2012-05-08 05:51:03 PM  
Demand tits or GTFO.
 
2012-05-08 05:53:59 PM  
Plenty of gyro shops (for the shawarma) but they'd be bored out of their skulls here. Might be amusing to have the Hulk dot the i at the Ohio State football game.
 
2012-05-08 05:55:28 PM  
So I wouldn't really have a reaction; because they wouldn't stick around long enough to matter.
 
2012-05-08 06:26:03 PM  

Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.


I saw it in both 2D and IMAX 3D. Trailer differences:

2D: Spider-Man (current trailer), no Dark Knight Rises, no Hobbit

IMAX 3D: Spider-Man (older trailer), Dark Knight Rises, Hobbit
 
2012-05-08 06:31:12 PM  

The English Major: Work with the local Shwarma establishment to jack up prices.


THIS
 
2012-05-08 06:31:24 PM  
i don't live in a major metropolitan area so if they ever came my way it would only be for some parade or public relations thing.

then i'd yell at them for not making the other world problems better, like stopping all the small time totalitarian dictators and feeding starving people, etc. they could do that if they wanted. but they don't.
 
2012-05-08 06:38:28 PM  
I'd move my car to an underground parking garage, before the Hulk decides to use it as a weapon.
 
2012-05-08 06:39:52 PM  

Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.


non-Imax 3D, viewed on Sunday: SpiderMan, Dark Knight, no Hobbit.
 
2012-05-08 06:44:57 PM  

CognaciousThunk: Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.

non-Imax 3D, viewed on Sunday: SpiderMan, Dark Knight, no Hobbit.


no hobbit for me. didnt even think that was close to being a trailer yet. spiderman (awful), expendables (meh) and dark knight rises (totally) and a bunch of kids movies/commercials, even some teen girl love story movie were the ones i got to see.

seeing it again tonight with some freinds who missed it this weekend. midweek trailers are always weak.
 
2012-05-08 06:45:29 PM  

CognaciousThunk: Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.

non-Imax 3D, viewed on Sunday: SpiderMan, Dark Knight, no Hobbit.


Spiderman again?
 
2012-05-08 06:48:50 PM  
I would pull a gun on Black Widow just to get her to kick my ass. If I was real lucky she'd use her legs to break my neck.
 
2012-05-08 06:54:22 PM  
Call up the guild and make sure my lair insurance is up to date?
 
2012-05-08 06:55:23 PM  

Gunny Highway: CognaciousThunk: Wayne 985: Side note, but out of curiosity, how many people got to see the new trailer for The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit at this film?

I was looking forward to both, but was only shown The Expendables 2, Frankenweenie, and Brave. I think that was my biggest letdown of the night.

non-Imax 3D, viewed on Sunday: SpiderMan, Dark Knight, no Hobbit.

Spiderman again?


that's what I said. Really the movie that my friends and I are waiting for is Prometheus.
 
2012-05-08 07:04:38 PM  
Grab some lube....

\ not the Hulk, though...unless he was Ed Norton again
 
2012-05-08 07:13:50 PM  

tiamet4: Grab some lube....

\ not the Hulk, though...unless he was Ed Norton again


I don't think lube is going to save you if Hulk wants sex.
 
2012-05-08 07:29:38 PM  
Wayne 985: tiamet4: Grab some lube....

\ not the Hulk, though...unless he was Ed Norton again

I don't think lube is going to save you if Hulk wants sex.


I dunno, as roided out as hulk looks he's probably got a tiny micro penis.
 
2012-05-08 07:33:05 PM  

Holfax: I'd move my car to an underground parking garage, before the Hulk decides to use it as a weapon.


He can use my car for a club if he wants to - I need a new one.

Be fun explaining it to the insurance company though.

"No, REALLY, this big green guy picked it up, lobbed it at the aliens and... are you laughing at me, lady? Look, here's a photo after it happened. There's the back bumper, over there is the engine... you think I would've lived through wrecking a Civic like that!?"
 
2012-05-08 07:35:29 PM  
Send my family away then watch the fight from a nearby hillside farm. If the moment presents itself, I'll hold up my "Willing to be a bondsmaiden to benevolent Viking gods" placard sign.
 
2012-05-08 07:40:47 PM  
I would definitely hit on Black Widow. Best Case Scenario, I get a super hot, super cool spy girlfriend. Worst Case Scenario, she kicks my ass, which is still a huge turn on. It's a win-win!
 
2012-05-08 07:45:13 PM  
I would leave town. When they all show up together, flying monsters will appear that will take out sides of buildings because they cannot properly negotiate a turn.
 
2012-05-08 07:52:05 PM  
I'd move. If they're here, it's just a matter of time before their arch nemisis shows up and most of the city is a burning, smouldering corpse filled wreck.
 
2012-05-08 07:52:43 PM  

Disgruntled Goat: What is "Stupid questions posed by 6th graders during recess," Alex?

This is what the main page has been reduced to? Seriously?


Yeah! Quit sullying Fark.com's long and respected history of thought-provoking, insightful headlines and comments.
 
2012-05-08 08:01:16 PM  
We already have Alpha Flight.
 
2012-05-08 08:14:42 PM  
1. GTFO away from town.
2. Start funding a contractor business to fix stuff.
3. Profit.

Of course, if anyone can calm down The Hulk with sexytime, it's Umar. She doesn't like Banner at all, but she calmed Hulk down so much, that Banner couldn't change back.
 
2012-05-08 08:29:33 PM  
I'd probably put on my armour, grab my sword, and try to team up with Thor. After defeating the bad guys, I'd wipe off the dirt and blood and tap the Widow like she was going out of style.

/what? I'd clearly be in the middle of an awesome lucid dream...
 
2012-05-08 08:37:05 PM  
I ask them how a guy with a bow and arrow and a cute chick in a leather outfit managed to sneak into the Avengers with no superpower/enhancements whatsoever.
 
2012-05-08 08:57:37 PM  

Disgruntled Goat: This is what the main page has been reduced to? Seriously?


I know, right? This used to be so high-brow and classy. Like, back when half the posts were links to pictures of girls in various stages of undress. We've really devolved as a society since then, I tell you. Where's my intelligent social/political banter?
 
2012-05-08 09:16:38 PM  
Buy a buttload of insurance?

Super heroing can be so messy pants.
 
2012-05-08 10:09:42 PM  

Oldiron_79: Wayne 985: tiamet4: Grab some lube....

\ not the Hulk, though...unless he was Ed Norton again

I don't think lube is going to save you if Hulk wants sex.

I dunno, as roided out as hulk looks he's probably got a tiny micro penis.


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
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