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(SeattlePI)   Dolphins die of heroin overdose after zoo rave. So long and thanks for all the OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ   (blog.seattlepi.com) divider line 136
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10920 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 May 2012 at 10:13 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-07 11:05:11 PM  
They tried to rescue most of the other fish from the aquarium.

They almost succeeded, but someone dropped the bass.
 
2012-05-07 11:06:30 PM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.


i564.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-07 11:06:55 PM  

Snapper Carr: Heroin? At a rave?

You're doing it wrong.


Not heroin. Heroin substitute. I Can't Believe It's Not Heroin, or something like that
 
2012-05-07 11:10:06 PM  
TFA reported a dubstep-heavy event. WUB is not the same as OONTZ. It's much, much, worse.
 
2012-05-07 11:10:58 PM  

studebaker hoch: They need to have these raves at someplace like Disneyland where all the animals are animatronic inside an active volcano.


There. FTFY.
 
2012-05-07 11:16:43 PM  
malaktaus

I like your rendering; all others have more holes than the brain of a PMA-head.
 
2012-05-07 11:20:13 PM  

Avery614: Seriously: fark the zoo for keeping captive dolphins in the first place.
fark the zoo for allowing a rave on or near their premises, let alone near an aquatic exhibit. fark the ravers for being a**holes and acting well... like ravers. fark the local municipality for allowing it all to happen.

/poor dolphins


Not that I've ever actually been to a rave, but I was under the impression that the majority of them were sort of an underground club scene - as in they rarely get 'approval' before having the party in some abandoned warehouse or whatever. Am I misinformed?

Also I've always heard that one of the big reasons zoos are still a popular attraction many places and even don't get a lot of flack from activists is that one of their main functions these days is to introduce urban citizens to a taste of nature and diversity of life on the planet - in other words, to teach people who live in the concrete jungle that there is more out there and try to get them interested in seeing it and hopefully respecting/preserving it... I won't go so far as to say all zoos are awesome and all the animals are happy, but when done right they can be. The San Diego Wild Animal Park was possibly the coolest 'tamed' exhibit I've ever seen, since the critters get to run around some good open spaces.
 
2012-05-07 11:20:23 PM  

ZackDanger: I think it's pretty clear that Techno Viking is most likely out there hunting down these dolphin killers as we speak.


Verily. He is a keeper of justice in a world gone mad.
 
2012-05-07 11:24:26 PM  
Is it okay to drop the people who poisoned them into a deep fryer?
 
2012-05-07 11:24:50 PM  

Avery614: bakageta: Though on that note, who does heroin (or a heroin substitute, whatever) at a rave? It's not really a party drug...

Mixing heroin and coke (speedball, feels close to an extacy high) was pretty popular at the clubs in the 90's....


I'm calling speedball too. Its been popular since people have done drugs. I love the old tincture adds from the 1800s "got a cold? How about some cocaine and heroin? Your friends at Bayer."

I don't recommend it tho seeing as how 90% of all celebrity overdoses (estimated by me just now) can be attributed to this combination.
 
2012-05-07 11:28:26 PM  

Gyrfalcon: Tell that serial killer whale about this, then drop the kids into his tank for a few laps.

He'll know what to do with them.


It's a farking crime that they still have that orca in captivity. He was born in the wild, his dorsal fin has become severely deformed from years in a pool, and he's KILLED THREE PEOPLE. Ya think he doesn't like it there?
 
2012-05-07 11:32:12 PM  
i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-07 11:34:00 PM  
What, now it's the music's fault that they couldn't handle their dope?
 
2012-05-07 11:37:32 PM  

Need_MindBleach: Gyrfalcon: Tell that serial killer whale about this, then drop the kids into his tank for a few laps.

He'll know what to do with them.

It's a farking crime that they still have that orca in captivity. He was born in the wild, his dorsal fin has become severely deformed from years in a pool, and he's KILLED THREE PEOPLE. Ya think he doesn't like it there?


He's been in captivity since he was two. He's over twenty now, and I suspect it would be impossible to return him to the wild.

That said, he shouldn't be anywhere near people, and should be in the largest possible tank, perhaps even an outdoor pen. He's obviously not a happy whale.
 
2012-05-07 11:38:23 PM  

foxbrook78: Raving dolphins? How do they hold the glow sticks?


Like they hold everything else. With their penises.
 
2012-05-07 11:40:14 PM  

ladyfortuna: Not that I've ever actually been to a rave, but I was under the impression that the majority of them were sort of an underground club scene - as in they rarely get 'approval' before having the party in some abandoned warehouse or whatever. Am I misinformed?


Yes. Plenty of raves get held with official sanction. Underground/unofficial ones are the minority and tend to get shut down as soon as the cops get wind of them.

And I don't know anyone who actually calls them "raves" anymore.


sandbar67: Snapper Carr: Heroin? At a rave?

You're doing it wrong.

Not heroin. Heroin substitute. I Can't Believe It's Not Heroin, or something like that


Either way, downers are not your typical rave drugs. Sort of defeats the purpose of going to a dance party if you're too zonked to actually do any dancing.
 
2012-05-07 11:46:17 PM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.


img35.imageshack.us

/not quite a dophin, but still
 
2012-05-07 11:52:11 PM  
Animal person Joan Embery used to own this beautiful tiger a few decades ago until her daughter brought home some drug buddies who then gave the tiger some LSD because they wanted to see the tiger 'go on a trip'. The daughter ran for help after the tiger started to go into convulsions and Joan Embery held her tiger until it passed away.

I figure that some moron or morons wanted to see the dolphins go on a trip.
 
2012-05-07 11:56:35 PM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.


i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-08 12:00:17 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.


Just when you think you've read it all...

Wow
 
2012-05-08 12:02:15 AM  

Agent Paper: I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.

I've had a really shiaty couple of weeks and that made me giggle. Thank you.


Those hooligans and their snorting of those marijuana goofballs!
 
2012-05-08 12:13:55 AM  

malaktaus: Here's my theory: the zoo staff fed the dolphins sedatives and killed them because who the hell knows how to adjust dosages for dolphins? It may have been at the behest of the person in charge, or perhaps an employee was opposed to the rave and thought he was doing the dolphins a favor by sedating them. What I don't get is, why buprenorphine and not heroin? It doesn't make any sense, if you're trying to quit drugs you don't go to raves (and that is what buprenorphine is most frequently used for, aside from pain treatment). Someone wanted to sedate the dolphins and they used prescription medication because they thought it would be safer, and maybe they didn't have drug connections anyway. Now they're going to blame the ravers, and they'll probably get away with it. If it was ravers it would've been MDMA or ketamine or something like that. Maybe cocaine. Pretty much any drug other than the one responsible, basically.

It was a boneheaded move having a rave at a zoo anyway, though. It's one of those things that should have been obvious. This is pretty much the best case scenario.


Have you ever met a hardcore raver? They are morons who will ingest pretty much any drug handed to them including pharmaceuticals that really have nothing to do with getting high... because they are morons.
 
2012-05-08 12:14:12 AM  

ladyfortuna: Avery614: Seriously: fark the zoo for keeping captive dolphins in the first place.
fark the zoo for allowing a rave on or near their premises, let alone near an aquatic exhibit. fark the ravers for being a**holes and acting well... like ravers. fark the local municipality for allowing it all to happen.

/poor dolphins

Not that I've ever actually been to a rave, but I was under the impression that the majority of them were sort of an underground club scene - as in they rarely get 'approval' before having the party in some abandoned warehouse or whatever. Am I misinformed?

Also I've always heard that one of the big reasons zoos are still a popular attraction many places and even don't get a lot of flack from activists is that one of their main functions these days is to introduce urban citizens to a taste of nature and diversity of life on the planet - in other words, to teach people who live in the concrete jungle that there is more out there and try to get them interested in seeing it and hopefully respecting/preserving it... I won't go so far as to say all zoos are awesome and all the animals are happy, but when done right they can be. The San Diego Wild Animal Park was possibly the coolest 'tamed' exhibit I've ever seen, since the critters get to run around some good open spaces.


Raves can be as you describe but that sounds more like the after-party to me. Philly clubs in the late 90's early 2000's had raves that would start at like 7 or 8 and wouldn't end until 4 or 5 the following morning. Usually there would be 2-4 DJ's spinning at all times in different areas within the club usually 2 hour sets, tents outside in an emptied lot for jungle, break beats and lesser known DJs doing shorter sets.

As for the rest of your comment, my problem isn't so much with zoos, as long as they are run properly. My problem is keeping any porpoise in "closed" captivity. There is just too much evidence that the creatures don't like it. I see no need to make them do shows and entertain people for food. I'm having a hard time finding the link but there are aquariums and learning centers built in such a way to allow wild species of porpoise to enter and leave as they please, I have no issue with this either, in fact I'd love to go to one. Something has always just bothered me about places like sea world, even as a kid when I had no idea if it was right or wrong.
 
2012-05-08 12:16:22 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: In case they're only mostly dead, they should try the voodoo cure to bring the dolphins back to life:

Sedate a lion, but not into unconsciousness, and jump over him three times with three fledgeling seagulls in a basket. On the next full moon, put the baby seagulls in the dolphin's mouth. It should come back to life and henceforth be invulnerable to harm.

Of course, you'll be in violation of the Mann Act--transporting young gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.


narwhaler.com
 
2012-05-08 12:16:41 AM  
Better than clubbing seals i guess...

i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-08 12:18:15 AM  
www.hrwiki.org

The Cheat, we had that lightswitch installed for you so you could turn the lights on and off, not so you could throw dolphin-killing raves!
 
2012-05-08 12:23:44 AM  
And just as a CSB...

There was a young fellow who was hired to deal with the gear truck where I worked years ago. He probably made more than I did... but he was an IDIOT. He was a total rave ecstasy hound and couldn't rub two brain cells together to save his life. The only thing he had going for him was he was young and strong. Well this dum dum started moaning to me about how bad his back was starting to hurt. I explained to him how ecstacy can deteriorate a healthy spine very rapidly with heavy use and maybe he should cut back a bit and talk to a doctor.

He didn't listen to me and sure enough a few weeks later he was too crippled to even walk. He lost his job and likely wouldn't be able to ever get another one because of how stupid he was and now he couldn't even lift a bag of chips.

He was 22 at that point if I remember correctly. Maybe younger.
 
2012-05-08 12:26:34 AM  

here to help: And just as a CSB...

There was a young fellow who was hired to deal with the gear truck where I worked years ago. He probably made more than I did... but he was an IDIOT. He was a total rave ecstasy hound and couldn't rub two brain cells together to save his life. The only thing he had going for him was he was young and strong. Well this dum dum started moaning to me about how bad his back was starting to hurt. I explained to him how ecstacy can deteriorate a healthy spine very rapidly with heavy use and maybe he should cut back a bit and talk to a doctor.

He didn't listen to me and sure enough a few weeks later he was too crippled to even walk. He lost his job and likely wouldn't be able to ever get another one because of how stupid he was and now he couldn't even lift a bag of chips.

He was 22 at that point if I remember correctly. Maybe younger.


Yeah, we get it. You're against X. But

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-05-08 12:28:02 AM  
So like the opposite of Benji Hayward?

/really obscure
 
2012-05-08 12:31:00 AM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: Yeah, we get it. You're against X. But


I'm not against any drugs. That was a story about moderation and not being a moron.

And as far as I know science has proven the correlation/causation factor of Ecstasy when it comes to spinal cord damage.

That's why you aren't supposed to do it every fookin' night... I mean aside from the million other obvious reasons.
 
2012-05-08 12:45:27 AM  

mamoru: I have no objection to taking the idiot ravers responsible, dropping them in the middle of a dolphin pod in the middle of the ocean, and letting the dolphins decide their fate.

And WTF is wrong with the zoo that it would have a rave there?? I'm not a hard core animal rights freak, but I do value and respect living things (even when I'm eating them). These animals have been taken out of the wild and confined to a swimming pool. The LEAST you could do is show some respect for them instead of treating them like toys. Grrrr...

This story just makes me angry all around. >:(


modern zoos get shiat for funding. they probably needed the money to keep the animals fed.
 
2012-05-08 12:50:46 AM  
For animals with sonar hearing, a possibly dubstep-heavy event was already considered a strain.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-08 12:58:18 AM  

here to help: thisisyourbrainonFark: Yeah, we get it. You're against X. But

I'm not against any drugs. That was a story about moderation and not being a moron.

And as far as I know science has proven the correlation/causation factor of Ecstasy when it comes to spinal cord damage.

That's why you aren't supposed to do it every fookin' night... I mean aside from the million other obvious reasons.



Right, except you're just repeating an urban legend that's even listed on wikipedia's list of misconceptions about illegal drugs page.

No, you shouldn't do it all the time. No, it doesn't do anything to your spine.
 
2012-05-08 01:03:38 AM  
I don't buy it.

Apart from the overtly sensationalist writing, every source links to other sources, none of which have done their own legwork and eventually cite angry animal rights organizations. An AOL Travel piece as a news source? It's not exactly video footage from a press conference.

And aquariums play really loud music right there at the tanks when trained dolphins perform every day. Why would a rave "nearby" be considered a strain?
 
2012-05-08 01:11:33 AM  

Gothnet: Right, except you're just repeating an urban legend that's even listed on wikipedia's list of misconceptions about illegal drugs page.

No, you shouldn't do it all the time. No, it doesn't do anything to your spine.


Oooh... wiki pages about drugs. I'm sure it's more than accurate.

I love the wiki but yeah... no.

I'll stick to actual street knowledge in this rare instance.
 
2012-05-08 01:17:29 AM  

here to help: Oooh... wiki pages about drugs. I'm sure it's more than accurate.

I love the wiki but yeah... no.

I'll stick to actual street knowledge in this rare instance.



Seriously, first you claim science is on your side, so I showed you that it's a misconception and now you're claiming street knowledge is superior.

You're either a troll or an idiot.
 
2012-05-08 01:18:35 AM  

J. Frank Parnell: mamoru: And WTF is wrong with the zoo that it would have a rave there?? I'm not a hard core animal rights freak, but I do value and respect living things

If Zoos truly cared for the well being of the animals, they'd have just left them in the wild instead of imprisoning them as curiosities for slackjawed humans.

Their only real concern is that the animals look good and don't die, to bring in more customers. I'm sure this zoo isn't upset about them dying so much as annoyed they have to buy more dolphins.


Yeah, it's not like when people have an emotional connection to something they can see in real life that will help alter harmful behaviors or cause them to contribute money to various animal causes.

It's not like zoo's do research and breeding programs for endangered animals.

/darn zoos
It's not like public education ever changed
 
2012-05-08 01:20:11 AM  
Great, piss them off... like there isn't gonna be much blood during their take over...

media.screened.com

/Seriously, what kind of imbecile gives drugs to animals?
 
2012-05-08 01:20:22 AM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: here to help: And just as a CSB...

There was a young fellow who was hired to deal with the gear truck where I worked years ago. He probably made more than I did... but he was an IDIOT. He was a total rave ecstasy hound and couldn't rub two brain cells together to save his life. The only thing he had going for him was he was young and strong. Well this dum dum started moaning to me about how bad his back was starting to hurt. I explained to him how ecstacy can deteriorate a healthy spine very rapidly with heavy use and maybe he should cut back a bit and talk to a doctor.

He didn't listen to me and sure enough a few weeks later he was too crippled to even walk. He lost his job and likely wouldn't be able to ever get another one because of how stupid he was and now he couldn't even lift a bag of chips.

He was 22 at that point if I remember correctly. Maybe younger.

Yeah, we get it. You're against X. But

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 424x282]


No, you're right.

Probably all the meth in his diet didn't help with the bone loss.
 
2012-05-08 01:24:42 AM  

DarkPascual: Great, piss them off... like there isn't gonna be much blood during their take over...



/Seriously, what kind of imbecile gives drugs to animals?


Ravers and Eurotrash.
 
2012-05-08 01:27:01 AM  
Probably a Jets fan.
 
2012-05-08 01:30:25 AM  

Gothnet: here to help: Oooh... wiki pages about drugs. I'm sure it's more than accurate.

I love the wiki but yeah... no.

I'll stick to actual street knowledge in this rare instance.


Seriously, first you claim science is on your side, so I showed you that it's a misconception and now you're claiming street knowledge is superior.

You're either a troll or an idiot.


To be fair. Unless properly documented, Wiki is little more than internet published street knowledge.

/drtfl
 
433 [TotalFark]
2012-05-08 01:30:41 AM  
i192.photobucket.com

Step 1: cook your dope
Step 2: inject into mackerel with an oral syringe
Step 3: feed dolphin
Step 4: watch Flipper die in front of you
Step 5: feed the monkey
 
2012-05-08 01:32:23 AM  

Gothnet: Seriously, first you claim science is on your side, so I showed you that it's a misconception and now you're claiming street knowledge is superior.

You're either a troll or an idiot.


NEWSFLASH:

Sometimes Wiki articles are author biased.

DOUBLE NEWSFLASH:

Most writings and studies about drugs are biased towards either legalization or prohibition and the science is rarely sound due to the illicit nature of said drugs causing a serious lack of a proper analysis groups as opposed to legal drugs.

FARK NEWSFLASH:

Lots of people on the internet (such as Wiki editors) are pro drug and will write whatever serves their purposes or skew the flow of information to support their bias.

ULTRAFARK NEWSFLASH:

Bite me.
 
2012-05-08 01:37:59 AM  

cuzsis: To be fair. Unless properly documented, Wiki is little more than internet published street knowledge.

/drtfl


That section of the wiki page gave three references, one to a page on erowid (the largest/best repository of both street and scientific knowledge of drugs in the world, as far as I know) that talks about it as a myth, one to an unsubstantiated post on a site called "askalice" that I'm not familiar with, also calling it a myth, and one to an Eminem song that perpetuates the myth.

So far on the "myth" side there is shaky evidence with one good reference.
On the "spine damage" side of the argument we have "here to help" asserting things.

If ecstasy really caused spine damage, governments all over the world would be jumping on it to use in their scare ads. Ecstasy would also be much higher up the scientifically-produced relative harm scales than it is. It's a myth.
 
2012-05-08 01:41:05 AM  

here to help: NEWSFLASH:

Sometimes Wiki articles are author biased.

DOUBLE NEWSFLASH:

Most writings and studies about drugs are biased towards either legalization or prohibition and the science is rarely sound due to the illicit nature of said drugs causing a serious lack of a proper analysis groups as opposed to legal drugs.

FARK NEWSFLASH:

Lots of people on the internet (such as Wiki editors) are pro drug and will write whatever serves their purposes or skew the flow of information to support their bias.

ULTRAFARK NEWSFLASH:

Bite me.



Yeah, so what you have there is bluster and shouting, not evidence.
 
2012-05-08 01:43:44 AM  

Gothnet: That section of the wiki page gave three references, one to a page on erowid (the largest/best repository of both street and scientific knowledge of drugs in the world, as far as I know) that talks about it as a myth, one to an unsubstantiated post on a site called "askalice" that I'm not familiar with, also calling it a myth, and one to an Eminem song that perpetuates the myth.

So far on the "myth" side there is shaky evidence with one good reference.
On the "spine damage" side of the argument we have "here to help" asserting things.

If ecstasy really caused spine damage, governments all over the world would be jumping on it to use in their scare ads. Ecstasy would also be much higher up the scientifically-produced relative harm scales than it is. It's a myth.



Gee willickers. You got a whole mountain of evidence there.

Lemme guess. You REALLY like ecstasy.
 
2012-05-08 01:45:27 AM  

fusillade762: ladyfortuna: Not that I've ever actually been to a rave, but I was under the impression that the majority of them were sort of an underground club scene - as in they rarely get 'approval' before having the party in some abandoned warehouse or whatever. Am I misinformed?

Yes. Plenty of raves get held with official sanction. Underground/unofficial ones are the minority and tend to get shut down as soon as the cops get wind of them.

And I don't know anyone who actually calls them "raves" anymore.


Now it's bullshiat like "dubstep raves" which defeats the entire purpose. Skipping between 160bpm and 110bpm at the whim of an incompetent DJ just pisses you off as soon as you're getting into a zone.
 
2012-05-08 01:47:25 AM  
Ha! Bluster and shouting indeed.

Go drop some more. It's obviously not making you irrational and one sighted.
 
2012-05-08 01:55:34 AM  

here to help: Gee willickers. You got a whole mountain of evidence there.

Lemme guess. You REALLY like ecstasy.


Don't do drugs, haven't for a long time. I do take an interest in drug-related myths though, they're interesting and mostly seem to be rooted in moral panic (vis LSD tattoos), misinterpreted science (Olneys lesions in rodents that have been exposed to PCP or K being taken as evidence that MDMA causes holes in the brain) or simply bizarre suppositions by users themselves (if you take more than three trips the government can declare you legally insane).



here to help: Ha! Bluster and shouting indeed.

Go drop some more. It's obviously not making you irrational and one sighted.



So you think it's irrational and 'one-sighted', whatever that means, to ask for evidence before you accept something as fact? In an area where myths are numerous and prominent?
 
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