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(CNN)   Coming to your Merriam Webster 2013 edition. Brogrammer: "Someone who wants to bro down and crush some code"   (cnn.com) divider line 59
    More: Asinine, Merriam-Webster, Quora, celebrities, personality types, south by southwest, Southwest Airlines, popped collars  
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1763 clicks; posted to Geek » on 07 May 2012 at 5:37 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-07 04:53:57 PM  
See also: no hire
 
2012-05-07 05:20:50 PM  
Gym tan code
 
2012-05-07 05:28:38 PM  
I think the Mayans predicted this, too
 
2012-05-07 05:40:59 PM  
Do people still pair program?
 
2012-05-07 05:41:52 PM  
I know what all those words mean, but that sentence is gibberish.
 
2012-05-07 05:46:56 PM  
Oxford dictionary ftw
 
2012-05-07 05:50:58 PM  
I got to my cube after lax practice and there was a slampiece underneath my desk waiting to give me dome. The company sent her to keep me chill. She got me a sandwich while I was optimizing a web app. I didn't even have to tell her to ice the Natty. MLIB.
 
2012-05-07 05:51:13 PM  
If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.

Also, try to quote women programmers, not just other journalist/authors/English majors. WTF is with journalists trying to act interested in programming all of a sudden?
 
2012-05-07 05:55:40 PM  

theorellior: I got to my cube after lax practice and there was a slampiece underneath my desk waiting to give me dome. The company sent her to keep me chill. She got me a sandwich while I was optimizing a web app. I didn't even have to tell her to ice the Natty. MLIB.


Good Lord he's having a stroke! Someone call 911!
 
2012-05-07 05:55:45 PM  
"Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.
 
2012-05-07 05:56:39 PM  
"Bro". Singular.

Sorry; the red mist was descending.
 
2012-05-07 05:58:06 PM  

theorellior: I got to my cube after lax practice and there was a slampiece underneath my desk waiting to give me dome. The company sent her to keep me chill. She got me a sandwich while I was optimizing a web app. I didn't even have to tell her to ice the Natty. MLIB.


Amazingly full of win.
 
2012-05-07 06:06:43 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: "Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.


Cool rant bro.
 
2012-05-07 06:07:04 PM  

azIndependent: If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.

Also, try to quote women programmers, not just other journalist/authors/English majors. WTF is with journalists trying to act interested in programming all of a sudden?


It's too late
 
2012-05-07 06:08:09 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: "Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.


Stabby makes me want to stab people
 
2012-05-07 06:15:46 PM  
What the hell is "crushing code"? When I google it, most of the results point back to that article. Do they mean "crunch some code"?
 
2012-05-07 06:19:02 PM  
and yet we're supposed to think that the wimps on TV portraying "Nerd Programmers" are not the least bit offensive? My colleagues are about as normal and diverse as most other professions. I think more of the non-techie types are XBox obsessed. My co-worker is a European Martial Arts competitor, I know several other sailors, and personally I've got to get to the gym in and hour and twenty something minutes. I'd rather see more Bro-grammers if it broke the stereotype.
 
2012-05-07 06:23:02 PM  

azIndependent: If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.


THIS

The whole thing was a gag about people with popped collars doing push-ups during a build. Ridiculous.
 
2012-05-07 06:25:14 PM  

jayhawk88: theorellior: I got to my cube... MLIB.

Good Lord he's having a stroke! Someone call 911!


Well played.
/Good thing I wasn't eating or drinking anything
 
2012-05-07 06:37:25 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: "Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.



Can't decide on the joke:

"Fist-pumping through the Mushroom Kingdom." (would make serious sense! watch 'em jump sometime!)

"Well, they are a couple orange-skinned Italians..."

/there's more, but I'm distracted by the first one...
 
2012-05-07 06:37:40 PM  
Almost all programmers are bro-ish in some respects.

For example, most of them are insufferable to be around.
 
2012-05-07 06:40:23 PM  
I am so pumped right now
 
2012-05-07 06:43:39 PM  
Cool story bro.
 
2012-05-07 06:45:44 PM  

azIndependent: If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.

Also, try to quote women programmers, not just other journalist/authors/English majors. WTF is with journalists trying to act interested in programming all of a sudden?


Don't be silly, there aren't any women programmers.

/One is interviewing today.
 
2012-05-07 06:46:10 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: "Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.


Don't taze me bro.

/I had to add both taze and bro to my Android dictionary. I'm going to remove them now.
 
2012-05-07 06:46:29 PM  
Subby, 2011 dialed up with their AOL account and posted on your MySpace. They want you to ChatRoulette and see if you can find someone for whom this is news.
 
2012-05-07 06:57:06 PM  

change1211: azIndependent: If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.

Also, try to quote women programmers, not just other journalist/authors/English majors. WTF is with journalists trying to act interested in programming all of a sudden?

Don't be silly, there aren't any women programmers.



You mean flowgrammers?
 
2012-05-07 07:01:41 PM  
Of course.. there's like a million apps that involve alcohol, partying, drinking games, or fart noises -- who the hell do you think designs them all?
 
2012-05-07 07:07:56 PM  

DeltaPunch: Of course.. there's like a million apps that involve alcohol, partying, drinking games, or fart noises -- who the hell do you think designs them all?


This is also an explanation as to why all those apps suck.
 
2012-05-07 07:10:02 PM  

Shazam999: Do people still pair program?


I find it a great way to get a project off the ground, but we usually work in really small teams of 1-4 people.

change1211: Don't be silly, there aren't any women programmers.

/One is interviewing today.


Fun fact: the company I work for tends to hire more female programmers than male ones. At senior levels, females outnumber males by a small-but-noticeable margin. Most of the females end up in management positions, in our office, but we've just recruited a new crop of female programmers and I'm trying to keep them far off the management track. Friends don't let friends get into management.
 
2012-05-07 07:15:50 PM  

Kuroshin: ArcadianRefugee: "Bro" as a noun is a word that makes me stabby.

Especially when kids say "Super Mario Bros".

Wanna punch 'em.

Don't even get me started on "bros" as a verb.


Can't decide on the joke:

"Fist-pumping through the Mushroom Kingdom." (would make serious sense! watch 'em jump sometime!)

"Well, they are a couple orange-skinned Italians..."

/there's more, but I'm distracted by the first one...


I like the bonus level where Luigi ices Mario.

/actually saw some 'tards doing this once
//thought it was a made-up internet thing until then
///wept for humanity
///and then i ate at Olive Garden, so I guess i am no better
 
2012-05-07 07:21:09 PM  

t3knomanser: Shazam999: Do people still pair program?

I find it a great way to get a project off the ground, but we usually work in really small teams of 1-4 people.

change1211: Don't be silly, there aren't any women programmers.

/One is interviewing today.

Fun fact: the company I work for tends to hire more female programmers than male ones. At senior levels, females outnumber males by a small-but-noticeable margin. Most of the females end up in management positions, in our office, but we've just recruited a new crop of female programmers and I'm trying to keep them far off the management track. Friends don't let friends get into management.


That is pretty unique then.

I've worked at 4 different small companies (Under 100 total employees). And the number of female programmers at any one time at each company never went over 1.
 
2012-05-07 07:23:04 PM  

theorellior: I got to my cube after lax practice and there was a slampiece underneath my desk waiting to give me dome. The company sent her to keep me chill. She got me a sandwich while I was optimizing a web app. I didn't even have to tell her to ice the Natty. MLIB.


If you have to tell the slampiece to ice the Natty, you're clearly working at the wrong company.

/it should be in the beer fridge before you get to work
 
2012-05-07 07:28:35 PM  

dletter:
I've worked at 4 different small companies (Under 100 total employees). And the number of female programmers at any one time at each company never went over 1.


Let me guess. There were all kind of ego clashes at those companies, and probably some casual sexism too.

Like I said, a lot of programmers are insufferable.

/Seen women in network ops, programming, engineering.
//All of them were good at their jobs too, and didn't cause a stink about it.
 
2012-05-07 07:31:05 PM  

karmaceutical: change1211: azIndependent: If you don't know that "brogramming" is satire, please don't write an article about it and try to pass it off as real journalism.

Also, try to quote women programmers, not just other journalist/authors/English majors. WTF is with journalists trying to act interested in programming all of a sudden?

Don't be silly, there aren't any women programmers.



You mean flowgrammers?


+1
 
2012-05-07 08:21:39 PM  

farkeruk: doing [anything] during a build. Ridiculous.


The JIT compiler is the the most heinous invention of in the history of the software industry. It's left many a cheeto uneaten and many a bonghit unripped.
 
2012-05-07 08:40:21 PM  

fluffy2097: Let me guess. There were all kind of ego clashes at those companies, and probably some casual sexism too.


"casual sexism"...

You sound female..

Have you seen how guys treat each other? If there's some "casual sexism" going on along with all the nerd-themed mama jokes, nerd-themed gay jokes, and nerd-themed nerd jokes, then that means they like you. If you're being quietly ignored, then there's real sexism, and you should be worried. Or, you're a shiatty programmer with personality issues and that has nothing to do with your vagina.
 
2012-05-07 08:43:30 PM  

IoSaturnalia: farkeruk: doing [anything] during a build. Ridiculous.

The JIT compiler is the the most heinous invention of in the history of the software industry. It's left many a cheeto uneaten and many a bonghit unripped.


JIT-compiling, with a decent language that can be debugged well, is ok. In theory, you get all the performance with ease of deployment. Languages that are parsed at runtime are the devil.
 
2012-05-07 08:45:43 PM  

jonny_q: IoSaturnalia: farkeruk: doing [anything] during a build. Ridiculous.

The JIT compiler is the the most heinous invention of in the history of the software industry. It's left many a cheeto uneaten and many a bonghit unripped.

JIT-compiling, with a decent language that can be debugged well, is ok. In theory, you get all the performance with ease of deployment. Languages that are parsed at runtime are the devil.


What has two thumbs and missed the point? b^.^d This bro.
 
2012-05-07 09:05:04 PM  

fluffy2097: Let me guess. There were all kind of ego clashes at those companies, and probably some casual sexism too.


A startup once took me to a strip club to convince me to join them. The whole "btw - I'm gay" thing came as kind of a shock. I at least waited until the first drink.

/didn't join them
//they didn't get past the second round of funding
 
2012-05-07 09:06:16 PM  

jonny_q:
"casual sexism"...

You sound female..



Thanks for proving my point that many programmers are both insufferable and sexist.

I've got a penis, thanks.
 
2012-05-07 09:16:43 PM  
My gods.

I'd love to see their comments.

/* PARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTY IN THIS CODE BLOCK UP HERE */

10 REM 857-5309 JENNY

For jocks who manage a semester in CS:

#include

int main()
{
int start;

do
{
printf("Need minutes to start the countdown (1 - 26): ");
scanf("%d",&start);
}
while(start
do
{
printf("Have to go to the gym in: %d\n",start);
start--;
sleep(1);
}
while(start>0);

printf("Have to go to the gym!");
return(0);
}

Oh it could be so much excitement.
 
2012-05-07 09:30:31 PM  

fluffy2097: jonny_q:
"casual sexism"...

You sound female..



Thanks for proving my point that many programmers are both insufferable and sexist.

I've got a penis, thanks.


Where do you keep it?
 
2012-05-07 09:39:15 PM  
What a duketastrophe?
 
2012-05-07 09:39:33 PM  

Guuberre: fluffy2097:

I've got a penis, thanks.

Where do you keep it?


My girlfriend keeps it in her pocketbook. Ever since the nonsense about her finding it in strange cracks....
 
2012-05-07 09:52:27 PM  
If you're working with Fortran, you want to drink AFTER you sift through thousands of lines of code.

/If you're dealing with FORTRAN77, godspeed because ALL CAPS and fixed formatting = death
 
2012-05-07 09:55:01 PM  

fluffy2097: Thanks for proving my point that many programmers are both insufferable and sexist.

I've got a penis, thanks.


Ahh. You're that guy. Good to know.
 
2012-05-07 10:10:54 PM  
Anybody who attended a large school with both a CompSci program and a Greek system can affirm that "brogrammers" do exist.

Most of them don't make it past Data Structures sophomore year, and it shows.
 
2012-05-07 10:11:34 PM  
I'm sorry everyone, could we go back to the beginning? What does "Bro Down" mean? I'm pretty sure thats a gay sex position, right?

/I'm old
 
2012-05-08 12:00:52 AM  
Yo, piecies, I just broke my cheesy box slammer and bash-rammed it into my food rape hole. Soon I'll be turbo-charging it down my meat highway and busting some porcelain chopadors. And now I'm going high-yappers on the plastic hork-a-dork and I be throwing my wizzap all up in this wooter scooter. You drakking what I'm frakking, what?
 
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