Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Bleacher Report)   Which old, retired guy will beat up John Cena this week? Will it be The Rock? Brock Lesnar? Johnny Ace? Baron Von Raschke? Lou Thesz? Georg Hackenschmidt? Find out when Senile Vince presents WWE Monday Night Raw, 9 PM on USA   (bleacherreport.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Brock Lesnar, John Cena, John Laurinaitis, Raw SuperShow, Alberto Del Rio, Greensboro, Daniel Bryan, WWE Championship  
•       •       •

390 clicks; posted to Sports » on 07 May 2012 at 6:45 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



1522 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | » | Last
 
2012-05-09 03:13:52 PM  
A revolution is coming...

Link
 
2012-05-09 03:31:03 PM  

SharkTrager: nyrkah1:

/it's 10 times BTW
//not that I'm counting

Like you can count.


I'll have you know I passed 3rd grade math.

/toughest 4 years of my life
//next year there's a field trip to the state capital
/// I've got it made because I already know the state capital.
//// it's "I"
 
2012-05-09 04:29:23 PM  
So I guess I am the only one that wishes Daniels was here. He was a good wrestling writer. I would be interested in his thoughts, from shiatty RAWs and us having fun mocking it.
 
2012-05-09 04:33:00 PM  

SharkTrager: TheManofPA: Remember when Zack Ryder could have been a thing that made Vince money?

Now they can't even get his name right when he makes them money:
Link

When I saw that I was annoyed.

Then I realized you have to be kinda lame to buy a replica belt and not put your own name on it.


Wrong!

It's lame to buy a replica belt and put your name on it. The only permissible custom engraved nameplate for a replica belt is

i6.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-09 07:50:05 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: SharkTrager: TheManofPA: Remember when Zack Ryder could have been a thing that made Vince money?

Now they can't even get his name right when he makes them money:
Link

When I saw that I was annoyed.

Then I realized you have to be kinda lame to buy a replica belt and not put your own name on it.

Wrong!

It's lame to buy a replica belt and put your name on it. The only permissible custom engraved nameplate for a replica belt is

[i6.photobucket.com image 512x384]


You really were dropped on your head as a child, weren't you?

BTW, it looks like Punk got grounded by Vince.
 
2012-05-09 09:09:51 PM  
Last mark standing.
 
2012-05-09 09:10:03 PM  
 
2012-05-09 09:14:08 PM  

FinFangFark: Fisty Bum: So, I just found out that TNA is doing a show here in June. Should I go and enjoy what will probably be a huge trainwreck?

If you can get a sign in somehow...should just keep it simple, yet on point:

#HeelTurn
#FaceTurn
#HeelTurn
#FaceTurn


How about "My, Dixie wrecked TNA"? Though that would be funnier if you could get it on a TV taping.
 
2012-05-09 09:19:11 PM  

SharkTrager: FirstNationalBastard: SharkTrager: TheManofPA: Remember when Zack Ryder could have been a thing that made Vince money?

Now they can't even get his name right when he makes them money:
Link

When I saw that I was annoyed.

Then I realized you have to be kinda lame to buy a replica belt and not put your own name on it.

Wrong!

It's lame to buy a replica belt and put your name on it. The only permissible custom engraved nameplate for a replica belt is

[i6.photobucket.com image 512x384]

You really were dropped on your head as a child, weren't you?

BTW, it looks like Punk got grounded by Vince.


What do you mean? I'm not coming across anything.
 
2012-05-09 09:22:23 PM  

TheManofPA: SharkTrager: FirstNationalBastard: SharkTrager: TheManofPA: Remember when Zack Ryder could have been a thing that made Vince money?

Now they can't even get his name right when he makes them money:
Link

When I saw that I was annoyed.

Then I realized you have to be kinda lame to buy a replica belt and not put your own name on it.

Wrong!

It's lame to buy a replica belt and put your name on it. The only permissible custom engraved nameplate for a replica belt is

[i6.photobucket.com image 512x384]

You really were dropped on your head as a child, weren't you?

BTW, it looks like Punk got grounded by Vince.

What do you mean? I'm not coming across anything.


After his apology he's been virtually silent. He has had 7 tweets, with almost no content, in 2 days, and almost all of those were because of the Cubs thing he did.
 
2012-05-09 09:27:01 PM  

SharkTrager: TheManofPA: SharkTrager: FirstNationalBastard: SharkTrager: TheManofPA: Remember when Zack Ryder could have been a thing that made Vince money?

Now they can't even get his name right when he makes them money:
Link

When I saw that I was annoyed.

Then I realized you have to be kinda lame to buy a replica belt and not put your own name on it.

Wrong!

It's lame to buy a replica belt and put your name on it. The only permissible custom engraved nameplate for a replica belt is

[i6.photobucket.com image 512x384]

You really were dropped on your head as a child, weren't you?

BTW, it looks like Punk got grounded by Vince.

What do you mean? I'm not coming across anything.

After his apology he's been virtually silent. He has had 7 tweets, with almost no content, in 2 days, and almost all of those were because of the Cubs thing he did.


Hadn't Punk been pretty silent on Twitter since Vince made Twitter the "OFFICIAL TWEETING PLATFORM OF WWE!!!1"?
 
2012-05-09 09:30:00 PM  

lurch_E_bean: FinFangFark: Fisty Bum: So, I just found out that TNA is doing a show here in June. Should I go and enjoy what will probably be a huge trainwreck?

If you can get a sign in somehow...should just keep it simple, yet on point:

#HeelTurn
#FaceTurn
#HeelTurn
#FaceTurn

How about "My, Dixie wrecked TNA"? Though that would be funnier if you could get it on a TV taping.


Just bring a sign of Madame De Stael
 
2012-05-09 09:41:38 PM  
God damn marks. Shutup.
 
2012-05-09 09:45:29 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Hadn't Punk been pretty silent on Twitter since Vince made Twitter the "OFFICIAL TWEETING PLATFORM OF WWE!!!1"?


He'd started picking up the pace again, although not at previous levels. But it's definitely changed. Even the content of the apology didn't seem like Punk.
 
2012-05-09 10:41:49 PM  
Break it down!

The May 7th WWE RAW Supershow from Greensboro, North Carolina scored a 3.01 cable rating with 4.30 million viewers. The first quarter-rating was a 3.50 but things fell apart from there.

In the segment breakdown, Big Show vs. Cody Rhodes lost 378,000 viewers and Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler lost 465,000 more viewers. Kelly Kelly and Layla vs. Maxine and Natalya lost another 207,000 viewers. Sheamus and Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho and Alberto Del Rio at the top of the hour gained 191,000 viewers, which is weak for that timeslot - doing a 2.89 quarter-rating.

The Miz vs. Brodus Clay gained 55,000 viewers in what is usually a losing segment. Paul Heyman's return gained 123,000 viewers. CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan and Lord Tensai in the overrun actually lost viewers - 105,000 for a 2.94 rating. It's almost impossible to lose viewers in the overrun because you've got people tuning into the USA Network for their next show.


So, Punk and Bryan get blamed for the overrun, not no one caring about Lord Albertsai and turning out in disgust after a pretty shiatty show?
 
2012-05-10 12:57:41 AM  
I'm disappointed they let golddust go before having him challenge cody for the belt
 
2012-05-10 05:45:26 AM  
Why Dustin Runnels was let go.

To save the pain of a Bleacher Report link, I'll cut & paste:
While this hasn't been confirmed, the belief from piecing together various stories is that he was responsible for coming up with the spot two weeks ago on Smackdown where Yoshi Tatsu took a double-team powerbomb from Titus O'Neil and Darren Young and landed dangerously. The bump was said to look even worse live than it did on TV.

TFA has a link to the bump that was taken down.

I was under the impression that powerbomb/piledriver type moves were verboten with a few exceptions, like if your name is "Undertaker." If that's the case, why was the spot called to begin with?
 
2012-05-10 08:34:57 AM  

ferro_man: I'm disappointed they let golddust go before having him challenge cody for the belt


I have heard he had pestered them about that so much leading up to WM that he had really pissed some people off.

I have to wonder, how lame do you have to be for Vince to look at a reasonably big name veteran wrestler who only wants to work big events under his own terms and says no?
 
2012-05-10 11:19:10 AM  
Today is the 89th time that a full day has been ALL ABOUT THE GAGNE!
 
2012-05-10 11:46:08 AM  
So, what are the odds we ever see 2008 on a RAW thread again?
 
2012-05-10 12:41:34 PM  

SharkTrager: So, what are the odds we ever see 2008 on a RAW thread again?


The day Vince actually passes away. If it happens before a raw or immediately after a raw before the thread closes.
 
2012-05-10 01:07:57 PM  

SharkTrager: So, what are the odds we ever see 2008 on a RAW thread again?


As soon as hockey playoffs end? The Fark fan bases for WWE and NHL have a surprising amount of overlap.
 
2012-05-10 03:17:10 PM  
John Cena tells his wife "FU"

Of course this means her attorney will fling all the mud out to the media, that he hates kids and the military, cheated on her with every Diva and groupie he was around, and of course that he's a closeted homo.

Liz...the world already knew 3 out of those 4.

And now a brief mark comment:
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. I bet it was Eve. This was part of her plan all along!
 
2012-05-10 03:23:36 PM  
"Although it is indeed unfortunate that John Cena decided to divorce his high school sweetheart Liz Cena; particularly, after they have come so far in their lives and in his career together, Liz will and really has no choice but to pursue all of her rights and entitlements. Although Mr. Cena pushes a prenuptial agreement and that the parties have only been married for approximately 3 years, Liz Cena has always supported John Cena, even when no one else did, and stood behind him and pushed him forward to achieve their goals for the last 14 years. Sadly, divorce is not the way Liz thought her perfect love story would end."

Oh, fark you, you scumbag divorce attorney. She signed the goddamn pre-nup, now doesn't want to abide by it?

Women: all for equality until legally binding contracts aren't in their favor.

/if this works out badly, Cena will be on the road until he's 60, like all the other boys who thought with their dicks.
 
2012-05-10 03:27:48 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: "Although it is indeed unfortunate that John Cena decided to divorce his high school sweetheart Liz Cena; particularly, after they have come so far in their lives and in his career together, Liz will and really has no choice but to pursue all of her rights and entitlements. Although Mr. Cena pushes a prenuptial agreement and that the parties have only been married for approximately 3 years, Liz Cena has always supported John Cena, even when no one else did, and stood behind him and pushed him forward to achieve their goals for the last 14 years. Sadly, divorce is not the way Liz thought her perfect love story would end."

Oh, fark you, you scumbag divorce attorney. She signed the goddamn pre-nup, now doesn't want to abide by it?

Women: all for equality until legally binding contracts aren't in their favor.

/if this works out badly, Cena will be on the road until he's 60, like all the other boys who thought with their dicks.


Cena will "No Sell" this to the moon.
Funny......
After the rock, Brock, Tensai , and Big Johnny, no one could take Cena down until now.....
 
2012-05-10 03:30:27 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: "Although it is indeed unfortunate that John Cena decided to divorce his high school sweetheart Liz Cena; particularly, after they have come so far in their lives and in his career together, Liz will and really has no choice but to pursue all of her rights and entitlements. Although Mr. Cena pushes a prenuptial agreement and that the parties have only been married for approximately 3 years, Liz Cena has always supported John Cena, even when no one else did, and stood behind him and pushed him forward to achieve their goals for the last 14 years. Sadly, divorce is not the way Liz thought her perfect love story would end."

Oh, fark you, you scumbag divorce attorney. She signed the goddamn pre-nup, now doesn't want to abide by it?

Women: all for equality until legally binding contracts aren't in their favor.

/if this works out badly, Cena will be on the road until he's 60, like all the other boys who thought with their dicks.


I get into arguments with vagin over this issue all the time. Look, if there is no prenup, I have no problem with the wife feeling she is entitled to half, as long as his wealth was accumulated during (not BEFORE or AFTER) or factors during the marriage attributed to the wealth, meaning law school, med school, etc.

But, when they sign that prenup, and then go to court over it, to me that's a violation of a contract agreement. She put her word down to agree to it. Meaning agreeing to provisions. So if a provision is if a party files for divorce a week before a 3 year deadline, or the husband would have to pay millions, well, she knew that was part of the deal.

What's funny is her attorney will throw out all Cena's dirty "secrets", and all that will do is get him over more with wrestling fans. We've all been dying for him to turn heel anyway.
 
2012-05-10 03:45:14 PM  
From TMZ:

Update 12:12 PM -- Liz' attorney tells us, Cena blindsided her with the divorce filing. They had been having issues -- and Cena even approached her recently with a pre-divorce financial settlement agreement -- but Liz refused to sign it, convinced the relationship would still work out.

FYI -- It's not uncommon in celeb divorces to bring up pre-divorce settlement agreements because they help simplify otherwise messy splits.
 
2012-05-10 03:48:35 PM  

Smiths: silgryphon: Smiths: EVE HAS GLASSES NOW BAH GAWD KING THAT MEANS SHE'S EVEN MORE EVIL

How's your ten year old alter ego?

i have a what?

if i had a ten year old alter ego i sure she'd be hot.


Wow.
 
2012-05-10 03:54:56 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: slamjack: He should WMD her just to become a bigger face.

Eh, I wouldn't mind seeing Eve get fisted.


Snort
 
2012-05-10 04:04:45 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: I haven't seen services peddled around the locker room like that since Kelly Kelly was lobbying to get the Divas title!


Will you stop?

(Bobby and guerrilla)
 
2012-05-10 04:13:03 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: nyrkah1: Gunny Highway: Does Vickie's stable have a name?

I would imagine she just rents an apartment somewhere.

Spittake.jpg


/rimshot
 
2012-05-10 04:17:30 PM  

Shady_Short_Busser: Woah...Kelly Kelly?!?

Where did THOSE come from?!?


She definitely got new balloons.
 
2012-05-10 04:23:43 PM  

hobblekitty: All chain store pizza sucks and blows. ALL.

Pizza Hut: nasty
Dominoes: blech
Little Ceasar's: crappy crappy
Papa Johns: poop

Gimme NY style, gimme Chicago Style or gimme Sicilian, but give it to me from a local joint with a good sauce.

When it comes to pizza, I keeps it real up in the feel.


The best pizza I've ever had comes from Don's Pizza Palace in Germantown,OH. They use a real old brick oven with a salted thin crust that is just mouth watering.
 
2012-05-10 05:08:04 PM  

FinFangFark: FirstNationalBastard: "Although it is indeed unfortunate that John Cena decided to divorce his high school sweetheart Liz Cena; particularly, after they have come so far in their lives and in his career together, Liz will and really has no choice but to pursue all of her rights and entitlements. Although Mr. Cena pushes a prenuptial agreement and that the parties have only been married for approximately 3 years, Liz Cena has always supported John Cena, even when no one else did, and stood behind him and pushed him forward to achieve their goals for the last 14 years. Sadly, divorce is not the way Liz thought her perfect love story would end."

Oh, fark you, you scumbag divorce attorney. She signed the goddamn pre-nup, now doesn't want to abide by it?

Women: all for equality until legally binding contracts aren't in their favor.

/if this works out badly, Cena will be on the road until he's 60, like all the other boys who thought with their dicks.

I get into arguments with vagin over this issue all the time. Look, if there is no prenup, I have no problem with the wife feeling she is entitled to half, as long as his wealth was accumulated during (not BEFORE or AFTER) or factors during the marriage attributed to the wealth, meaning law school, med school, etc.

But, when they sign that prenup, and then go to court over it, to me that's a violation of a contract agreement. She put her word down to agree to it. Meaning agreeing to provisions. So if a provision is if a party files for divorce a week before a 3 year deadline, or the husband would have to pay millions, well, she knew that was part of the deal.

What's funny is her attorney will throw out all Cena's dirty "secrets", and all that will do is get him over more with wrestling fans. We've all been dying for him to turn heel anyway.


hobblekitty: From TMZ:

Update 12:12 PM -- Liz' attorney tells us, Cena blindsided her with the divorce filing. They had been having issues -- and Cena even approached her recently with a pre-divorce financial settlement agreement -- but Liz refused to sign it, convinced the relationship would still work out.

FYI -- It's not uncommon in celeb divorces to bring up pre-divorce settlement agreements because they help simplify otherwise messy splits.


Someone needs to photoshop Liz cena opposite John in a contract signing segment.
 
2012-05-10 05:18:00 PM  

in case the other headline doesnt make it...

SORRY PLAYA, BUT YOUR WIFE WANTS IT ALL1.bp.blogspot.com

 
2012-05-10 05:21:47 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-10 05:32:24 PM  

P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]


His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!
 
2012-05-10 05:36:17 PM  

MagSeven: P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]

His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!


If WWE is going to use this in an angle, I want them to use that kiss with Eve as the cause of it. and I want JR back to call her a HOMEWRECKER! JEZEBEL! BAH GAWD!
 
2012-05-10 06:13:43 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: MagSeven: P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]

His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!

If WWE is going to use this in an angle, I want them to use that kiss with Eve as the cause of it. and I want JR back to call her a HOMEWRECKER! JEZEBEL! BAH GAWD!


BAH GAWD KING!
 
2012-05-10 06:20:41 PM  
On a personal note, I hope Cena nails her ass to the wall with the pre-nup. Listen lady, you signed the god damn contract. Live up to the agreement.

FNB (i think ) saw my opinion on this in that one fark thread about it where I pissed off several farkettes
 
2012-05-10 06:52:26 PM  

silgryphon: Arm Bar sign!


I was wondering if any other Farker noticed that........
 
2012-05-10 07:00:43 PM  
HEEL TURN! HEEL TURN! HEEL TURN!
 
2012-05-10 07:03:28 PM  

verbaltoxin: Dougie AXP: verbaltoxin: Even CM Punk is bored. He's tweeting right now.

What did he say?

@CMPunk
I tweet happy today. Hell, I'm just happy. Nice spending time with an old friend.


I bet he had a real good time with paul heyman monday night.
 
2012-05-10 07:13:56 PM  
A former Strikeforce champion just signed with TNA and Bellator. At the same time.

Link
 
2012-05-10 07:14:13 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: MagSeven: P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]

His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!

If WWE is going to use this in an angle, I want them to use that kiss with Eve as the cause of it. and I want JR back to call her a HOMEWRECKER! JEZEBEL! BAH GAWD!


FARK THAT.

I thought it was a lost cause, but now I have hope... LET THE BROMANCE COMMENCE!
 
2012-05-10 07:16:33 PM  

KellyKellyKelly: FirstNationalBastard: MagSeven: P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]

His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!

If WWE is going to use this in an angle, I want them to use that kiss with Eve as the cause of it. and I want JR back to call her a HOMEWRECKER! JEZEBEL! BAH GAWD!

FARK THAT.

I thought it was a lost cause, but now I have hope... LET THE BROMANCE COMMENCE!


If Zack Ryder weren't being punished for being successful without Senile Vince's approval, I'd want to see Ryder giving Cena advice about how to handle a messy break-up, maybe take him out on the town to cheer him up... then set Cena up with a hooker who ties him up and leaves him tied to a bed, while Ryder comes in, laughs, and pummels him.
 
2012-05-10 07:19:18 PM  
Cena won't miss a day of TV and will continue on as usual. I'm calling it right now. You can't confuse kids with stuff like divorce angles, because you know, kids don't see parents get divorced every damn day or something.
 
2012-05-10 07:47:10 PM  

KellyKellyKelly: FirstNationalBastard: MagSeven: P-Money All $tar: [i.imgur.com image 330x330]

His time is up! The time is now!
To get some strange! THE TIME IS NOW!
Got a divorce ladies, I'm shinin' now!
Eve and Rosa Mendes, The time is NOW!

If WWE is going to use this in an angle, I want them to use that kiss with Eve as the cause of it. and I want JR back to call her a HOMEWRECKER! JEZEBEL! BAH GAWD!

FARK THAT.

I thought it was a lost cause, but now I have hope... LET THE BROMANCE COMMENCE!


*President Obama nods approvingly*
 
2012-05-10 07:53:30 PM  
Anyone up for TNA
 
2012-05-10 08:26:30 PM  

silgryphon: Anyone up for TNA


You serious bro?
 
Displayed 50 of 1522 comments

First | « | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | » | Last

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report