John Cena interview....

He can keep his eyes on everywhere. No wonder he wins all the time. His left eyeball can see into tomorrow....

FirstNationalBastard: styckx: And Vince made CM Punk apologize on Twitter...

fark.This.Company

You didn't clarify things...

He apologized for the "Kill Yourself" comment, not for ruining the Paul Heyman thing (which is what I thought you were talking about).

/Is next week the week I attempt the My Little Pony headline? Well, Raw has been horrible lately... and the Best Young Flyer competition would probably get us to Gredunza quicker!

//And speaking of Gredunza... since the so-called Botch was a simulpost, and I feel like being a dick because of intentional botches, lurch_E_bean is awarded the title.

I was robbed

FirstNationalBastard: //And speaking of Gredunza... since the so-called Botch was a simulpost, and I feel like being a dick because of intentional botches, lurch_E_bean is awarded the title.

Sneaking in to win the title after everyone thought it was over!

LOLOLOL... Read this. Now think back to what they did with Cena on RAW.. The fans must have been wondering what drugs Vince is on trying to pull asshatery like this.

RAW Dark Match

John Cena defeated Kane. Cena had his arm heavily taped, and fought basically with one arm, which he sold very well. The crowd was very pro-Cena. Short, basic dark match main event with each wrestlers signature spots. Kane introduced a chair into the match, only to eat an AA immediately after for the 1-2-3.

styckx: LOLOLOL... Read this. Now think back to what they did with Cena on RAW.. The fans must have been wondering what drugs Vince is on trying to pull asshatery like this.

RAW Dark Match

John Cena defeated Kane. Cena had his arm heavily taped, and fought basically with one arm, which he sold very well. The crowd was very pro-Cena. Short, basic dark match main event with each wrestlers signature spots. Kane introduced a chair into the match, only to eat an AA immediately after for the 1-2-3.

I AM A WIZARD.

The FWC must have had their period. So much whining.
I've invested in tissue ads on fark for you crying biatches...

Not only am I a flag bearing member of the FWC, I spend much time here when I could be spending it on porn or a real life.
I went so far as to track down the "overly excited Lesnar fan" and get an interview, I did it for you.
This is why I'm not a card carryin' member of a blowski pack rats.
I did it for you.
For us.
Raw was a solid show. So what, they didn't chant YES!
So what they didnt smark out.
WWE gave us a solid show.
I am DISSAPOINT.

eddievercetti: Again with hockey in the way, what did I miss so I can catch up manana?

We had a solid show with good matches, but everyone here had a bad time cos they had the cramps.
Party poopers tonight.

This is why I don't follow the blow pop bubblegummers or the whiskey and fries....

I stand alone.

It was all Golddusts fault as he was fired... I don't know what else to blame it on other than Senile Vince ??

Thank you FWC for making RAW entertaining. Or for being more entertaining than raw. I missed the show up to the random tag match thanks to running late from Ortoning all day and the computer at work in the studio I use was BSOD'ing on me until the IT guy let me fix it since I don't like going into business for myself with company stuff.

Seemed like a rather pedestrian RAW. That was a horrible crowd to trout out Paul E in front of. Those assholes "what-ed" Heyman? Fark them where they breathe. I'm not the biggest Paul E guy out there, but it was good to see him on TV. I thought they'd use him for something since he's been at Titan Towers to do stuff for Punk's DVD, but that area wasn't exactly an ECW hotbed. Hell, it would've worked better in Milwaukee, since he had TV here and ran shows, including several TV tapings at the Eagles' Club.

Miz/Brodus was okay. They've gotta be protecting Clay since I see him blowing up easy if they put him with someone who can go and decent time was given for the match.

I kinda understood the main... Get heat on Johnny Ace, build A-Train, and get heat on DBD post match with his putting the boots to Punk post-match. I would expect Punk to not have a great night next week to lead into the PPV. I would also expect a Brodus/Albert feud down the road. Seems obvious to me.

BTW, Dutch Mantel said that when he had the book in Memphis, he'd often call TV on the day of. He also had the benefit of having talent that could improvise. And not having Vince breathing down his neck.

Morrius: Also, judging by the comments section of WWE and RAW's facebook pages, everyone who likes those things is a 12 year old mark. No wonder they keep pushing Cena.

Nope. They delete a lot of negative stuff and anything that doesn't fit the preconceived order of things.

lurch_E_bean: FirstNationalBastard: //And speaking of Gredunza... since the so-called Botch was a simulpost, and I feel like being a dick because of intentional botches, lurch_E_bean is awarded the title.

Sneaking in to win the title after everyone thought it was over!

[i10.photobucket.com image 291x165][i10.photobucket.com image 291x165][i10.photobucket.com image 291x165]

No way in hell does anyone recognize that title win.

Fisty Bum: They COULD have had a Bryan/Punk match to build some excitement for the PPV, but noooooooooooooooo. They just HAD to keep pushing Lord Albert Tensai for some unknown reason.

FARK.
THIS.
COMPANY.

wait until Lord Tensai runs in during the PPV match to set up CM Punk vs Tensai for the following PPV.

styckx: I wouldn't unless you want all your friends to know you watch WWE.. Soon as you vote on any Facebook poll it's plastered on your timeline what poll you just voted on.

and i'm pretty sure the site who posted the poll can get your info and friend's info if only just their names so then they can attempt to send mail to them based on the username.

Facebook and Like buttons are evil; you don't even have to use them to be targeted by them.

Companies finally figured it out. we no longer need the individual to enroll... you're as private on the internet as your friends are. They figured out how to make it so the weakest link can expose the whole chain.

Fisty Bum: Smiths: Fisty Bum: They COULD have had a Bryan/Punk match to build some excitement for the PPV, but noooooooooooooooo. They just HAD to keep pushing Lord Albert Tensai for some unknown reason.

FARK.
THIS.
COMPANY.

wait until Lord Tensai runs in during the PPV match to set up CM Punk vs Tensai for the following PPV.

I will literally explode in a fireball of impotent rage.

you know it's coming. Tensai hasn't had a PPV match yet. They didn't bring him back just to be on RAW for 5 minutes. He has PPVs coming.

I called at least 2 before he ends up in a "Big Man" feud with Big Show (ignoring them being partners against Undertaker at a Wrestlemania), then he'll be in a program with Kane. Eventually he'll have to squash Khali to attempt some more legitimacy (though the sight of Khali having to "sell" the claw would be hilarious).

Then he'll disappear again.

I miss MVP.

Seriously... how did they screw this up:

Entrance was great, and he actually looked like he enjoyed doing it.

I miss MVP too. I don't know why, maybe b/c the gimmick was pretty spot on with many of the divas in pro sports these days.

And went back and watched the rest of Raw. I love KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK's boobie upgrade. I wonder which superstar got to test drive them first. My money is on CM Punk because he has mad lady skills.

But the rest of the show just seemed to putter out, like there wasn't emotion in it. Hmmm, I wonder if that has something to do with the fact that the show was written on the fly, and finalized just before showtime.

Good to see Paul E....he's always great on the mic. But my God, the crowd was God awful. For NC, that's embarrassing.

[start nickelback]

fWc Did You Know?

As of this moment, Fark's Monday Night RAW thread had 150% more comments than the NHL Playoff thread, and 1600% more comments than the NBA Playoff thread

source: fark.com

[end nickelback]

Twitch Boy: Dougie AXP: Little Ceasars still exists?!

Yup.

And you know that $5 Hot and Ready you just bought? You just helped finance the Detroit Red Wings. (Or Tigers.)

/Ilitch doesn't have much longer I fear
//that's why he went all in on Prince Fielder

Little Ceasar's helps me feed my four grandkids on a Friday night. 2 or 3 $5 pizzas and they shut their greedy little pie holes.

nyrkah1: Gunny Highway: Does Vickie's stable have a name?

I would imagine she just rents an apartment somewhere.

You owe me one keyboard and anything else on my desk!

More nostalgia:

Jericho's last "redebut"

He Ortoned on Orton's parade

i miss those cool titantrons

FinFangFark: And went back and watched the rest of Raw. I love KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK's boobie upgrade. I wonder which superstar got to test drive them first. My money is on CM Punk because he has mad lady skills.

yeah i missed that. just looked up on YouTube.

Another "Diva" goes under the knife to extend her time.
and who the hell is Maxine?

I really detest Kelly Kelly. I know she tries and is learning a lot. But I mean for god's sake.. the woman's name is Barbie Blank. She tries all she can but there is no emotion there. Just blonde hair Malibu Stacy.

And Layla? Who cares. That was another "Fark you Smarks" vince thing and of course Kharma has to be punished for it.

Last wrestler who said they were going to do something on TV was Brodus Clay. And he ended up repackaged.

Kharma is gonna be repackaged as a Funckadactyl. or whatever the hell it is.

This wasn't even a show that was fun to mock. It was just dull. They have less wrestling than they should, and much of what they do have doesn't have any purpose. Maybe 2 matches last night meant something, and one of the 2 (Punk vs. Abert & D-Bry) mangled story lines and buried the main event for the next PPV.

And they are so out of Diva's they had to take a volunteer from the crowd to pair with Nat?

Smiths: I know she tries and is learning a lot.

You do? How do you know this?

I mean, I see lots of wrestlers saying this... and then I watch her matches and see she still hasn't figured out how to run the farking ropes. She's been wrestling how long now, and hasn't gotten that?

HeartBurnKid: Smiths: I know she tries and is learning a lot.

You do? How do you know this?

I mean, I see lots of wrestlers saying this... and then I watch her matches and see she still hasn't figured out how to run the farking ropes. She's been wrestling how long now, and hasn't gotten that?

Bah Gawd King, Kelly Kelly hit the ropes, and is broken in half!

Fisty Bum: HeartBurnKid: Smiths: I know she tries and is learning a lot.

You do? How do you know this?

I mean, I see lots of wrestlers saying this... and then I watch her matches and see she still hasn't figured out how to run the farking ropes. She's been wrestling how long now, and hasn't gotten that?

This. She hasn't made any improvements since I started watching WWE again last year. The Divas division is a trainwreck as it is with the only exception being Kharma. And we don't get to see her because Vince is all "lolololol, i troll u!"

That' why Gail Kim came back, then ultimately left again. She made probably 20 times the money she was paid at TNA. But, it's not worth it when you're on for barely 60 seconds, are required to be in ring shape, yet never wrestle, and expected to make all the non-US tours so the foreigners can play grab ass.

I would love Velvet Sky to be a Diva, b/c she's such a great little tight piece of ass and can wrestle, but we all know what will happen to her 3 months after she debuts. NOTHING.

I'm sure Kharma enjoys the paychecks, but hates doing nothing.

HeartBurnKid: Smiths: I know she tries and is learning a lot.

You do? How do you know this?

I mean, I see lots of wrestlers saying this... and then I watch her matches and see she still hasn't figured out how to run the farking ropes. She's been wrestling how long now, and hasn't gotten that?

ya know. you're damn right.
She had a period of trying new moves. I guess I took that for granted and assumed she kept doing it.

Now she's back to ass waggling. Hell, watching that video for more than 20 seconds (I only saw the implants and commented)... she just stared around in the ring waiting for Layla so they could do their "double ass wiggle ooh we bumped tushies!" move.

Yeah. screw you Barbie you stopped trying. Fake tits so now you REALLY won't try because i guarantee one of them will pop soon.

Smiths: Yeah. screw you Barbie you stopped trying. Fake tits so now you REALLY won't try because i guarantee one of them will pop soon.

An implant buster by Kharma on a ppv?

So, Vince stooped to new lows (for himself) of putting Heyman back on TV for cheap interest in the show.

Who is left in the little black book of former stars Vince can roll out? Vince is doing the Dixie Carter "Big Surprise/Announcement" gimmick just without announcing it before hand. Like TNA though, it's good for the initial mark out, then they fark it up beyond all belief a week later and no one cares again.

Smiths: FinFangFark: And went back and watched the rest of Raw. I love KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK's boobie upgrade. I wonder which superstar got to test drive them first. My money is on CM Punk because he has mad lady skills.

yeah i missed that. just looked up on YouTube.

Another "Diva" goes under the knife to extend her time.
and who the hell is Maxine?

I really detest Kelly Kelly. I know she tries and is learning a lot. But I mean for god's sake.. the woman's name is Barbie Blank. She tries all she can but there is no emotion there. Just blonde hair Malibu Stacy.

And Layla? Who cares. That was another "Fark you Smarks" vince thing and of course Kharma has to be punished for it.

Last wrestler who said they were going to do something on TV was Brodus Clay. And he ended up repackaged.

Kharma is gonna be repackaged as a Funckadactyl. or whatever the hell it is.

Actually, Layla is pretty awesome. Her reign with McCool as Laycool was often the best part of many shows last year. Certainly the best thing about the Diva division. They had a great feud before she got hurt as well. She's not bad on the mic during promos (she's a much better heel than face, though). She also isn't afraid to take a bump.
/she also has a spectacular ass.

LayCool was a poor man's Beautiful People or even worse an updated PMS.

Then the Bella retards got tapped as the new ones since McCool had to go be Taker's bone.

MagSeven: Actually, Layla is pretty awesome. Her reign with McCool as Laycool was often the best part of many shows last year. Certainly the best thing about the Diva division. They had a great feud before she got hurt as well. She's not bad on the mic during promos (she's a much better heel than face, though). She also isn't afraid to take a bump.
/she also has a spectacular ass.

All of this. ALL of this. Especially the heel part.

My favorite Layla moment was when LayCool was in the ring with Nattie, and Layla does the anvil beard-stroke. Cracked up when I realized what she was doing. I'll see if I can find that gif.

Man Smiths is working up a frothy rage today.

Dougie AXP: Man Smiths is working up a frothy rage today.

Philly's going to be eliminated tonight and the Caps couldn't hold a lead.
Today's bitter hockey day.

/still a better round two last year with dual-sweeps.
//8 straight days of watching the teams you like lose hits hard
///at least the final rounds were exciting

Smiths: Dougie AXP: Man Smiths is working up a frothy rage today.

Philly's going to be eliminated tonight and the Caps couldn't hold a lead.
Today's bitter hockey day.

/still a better round two last year with dual-sweeps.
//8 straight days of watching the teams you like lose hits hard
///at least the final rounds were exciting

Yea I feel you. If NY and NJ advance I'm going for the Kings. However if the 'yotes pull it out, I'll gladly root for them in the finals.

MagSeven: Actually, Layla is pretty awesome. Her reign with McCool as Laycool was often the best part of many shows last year. Certainly the best thing about the Diva division. They had a great feud before she got hurt as well. She's not bad on the mic during promos (she's a much better heel than face, though). She also isn't afraid to take a bump.
/she also has a spectacular ass.

I have to disagree with you a bit. Layla's a decent enough wrestler, and yes, has a fantastic ass, but I hated Laycool. And not in that good "hate the heel" way, either; more in the "fast-forward" way. They were just so very annoying.

Dougie AXP: Smiths: Dougie AXP: Man Smiths is working up a frothy rage today.

Philly's going to be eliminated tonight and the Caps couldn't hold a lead.
Today's bitter hockey day.

/still a better round two last year with dual-sweeps.
//8 straight days of watching the teams you like lose hits hard
///at least the final rounds were exciting

Yea I feel you. If NY and NJ advance I'm going for the Kings. However if the 'yotes pull it out, I'll gladly root for them in the finals.

Never, ever underestimate the Rangers ability to fark up.

Though with 6.6 seconds left last night, I came and Ortoned simultaneously.

/it was a mess
//BAH GAWD, I LOVE PLAYOFF HOCKEY

HeartBurnKid: MagSeven: Actually, Layla is pretty awesome. Her reign with McCool as Laycool was often the best part of many shows last year. Certainly the best thing about the Diva division. They had a great feud before she got hurt as well. She's not bad on the mic during promos (she's a much better heel than face, though). She also isn't afraid to take a bump.
/she also has a spectacular ass.

I have to disagree with you a bit. Layla's a decent enough wrestler, and yes, has a fantastic ass, but I hated Laycool. And not in that good "hate the heel" way, either; more in the "fast-forward" way. They were just so very annoying.

I didn't really get into them until they started mentoring Kaval on NXT. They had a good blend of heel and humor for me. Then it looked like they were going to form a super stable with Vickie, Dolph and Swagger (I think it was Swagger), but that didn't go anywhere.

The scheduled dark match main event between WWE Champion CM Punk and Chris Jericho never took place. Instead, after RAW went off the air, John Cena faced Kane.

So much for the arm injury, banned from the building, let him rest for the PPV and Live via Satellite.

SharkTrager: The scheduled dark match main event between WWE Champion CM Punk and Chris Jericho never took place. Instead, after RAW went off the air, John Cena faced Kane.

So much for the arm injury, banned from the building, let him rest for the PPV and Live via Satellite.

Yeah, wtf? I'm all for suspension of disbelief, but that's a bit much.

SharkTrager: The scheduled dark match main event between WWE Champion CM Punk and Chris Jericho never took place. Instead, after RAW went off the air, John Cena faced Kane.

So much for the arm injury, banned from the building, let him rest for the PPV and Live via Satellite.

Also: Let's have a one-armed man beat our "unstoppable monster".
/has Kane even won at a PPV since he came back?

MagSeven: SharkTrager: The scheduled dark match main event between WWE Champion CM Punk and Chris Jericho never took place. Instead, after RAW went off the air, John Cena faced Kane.

So much for the arm injury, banned from the building, let him rest for the PPV and Live via Satellite.

Also: Let's have a one-armed man beat our "unstoppable monster".
/has Kane even won at a PPV since he came back?

He beat Orton at WM.

TBH Kane has pretty much been used this way his entire career. Every once in a blue moon he'll get a big win to save credibility but he pretty much has always been used as jtts.