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(Cracked)   Han Solo: the Game: You and Chewbacca, running around the Outer Rim in the Falcon, smuggling, dog-fighting, breaking hearts -- all happening before the events in Star Wars... And 5 other great video games you'll never get to play   (cracked.com) divider line 120
    More: Sad, Han Solo, Star Wars, Chewbacca, Dead Rising, love of God, indie games, Hot Pockets, Red Dead Redemption  
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9427 clicks; posted to Geek » on 05 May 2012 at 8:24 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-05 05:48:50 PM
WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.

mmorpg.ua

Luckily, the players decided to take the abandonware and remake the game themselves.

images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2012-05-05 05:57:35 PM
Oh stop whining, there's plenty of good Star Wars games, the one on Kinect had superb acting and music.
 
2012-05-05 05:59:35 PM
And just realized my link is already in the article. That'll teach me to RFTA.

/yeah right it will
 
2012-05-05 06:00:23 PM
i always just assumed Star Wars Kinect would suck, given that I don't like Star Wars that much. But it wasn't until now that I saw the videos from that dancing game.

Everybody involved in that deserves very bad things to happen to them.
 
2012-05-05 06:01:53 PM
They did a survival horror type game with dinosaurs called Trespass. It was pretty ambitious. A first person game with limited weapons and ammo. A physics engine so you could stack objects to get past areas or throw objects at things to knock them off high areas you couldn't reach. There were breakable objects. The dinosaurs were all 3d modeled and had their own personalities and needs (food, rest, etc). There was kind of an ecosystem so you'd be wandering around and find a t-rex attacking another dinosaurs.

And it got pretty intense because if you only had a 2x4 and a raptor was coming at you, you were screwed. You had to get creative. I remember walking across a monorail track while a raptor followed me from down below. Not sure how I'd get away. I was dropping bricks and crates on its head (no inventory system also, what was in your hand was in your hand) I hit a broken part of the track and a huge concrete platform started rocking back and forth with me on it. It fell and when I landed I started running like hell. Turned around and was surprised to see the platform had landed right on the dinosaurs head.

If a t-rex was around forget it. You were powerless.

Had some major faults though. Lots of glitches with the physics engine. You only had one arm. To check your health you had to look down at a boob tat of a heart on your character's cleavage.
 
2012-05-05 06:03:30 PM
oh and it was a Jurassic Park product so it took place on one of the islands. Similar to the setting for JP2.

www.cdaccess.com
image.com.com
 
2012-05-05 06:22:24 PM
I would actually start playing video games if that wizard game were a real thing.
 
2012-05-05 06:24:58 PM
I like the Kinect-Motion Capture idea. Of course, the first mod would be a fapping gesture spell.
 
2012-05-05 06:43:19 PM

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: I like the Kinect-Motion Capture idea. Of course, the first mod would be a fapping gesture spell.


imgs.xkcd.com
 
2012-05-05 08:07:09 PM

Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.


Agreed that SWG was an awesome game (SWGEmu is still live: Link), but in my opinion, the game most closely resembling what was described was 2003's Freelancer

 
2012-05-05 08:09:22 PM
wow. I effed up the html in that horribly. fitting it should be a fark post.
 
2012-05-05 09:06:31 PM

mactobain: Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.


Agreed that SWG was an awesome game (SWGEmu is still live: Link), but in my opinion, the game most closely resembling what was described was 2003's Freelancer


Actually did download a Freelancer mod with all sorts of famous sci-fi ships, and yes, the Falcon was one of the ships I bought. However, it was near impossible to do the race in the story because the Falcon was almost the exact width of the rings you have to fly through. Had to do a lot of corkscrew twists to get the right angle to squeeze through.

Freelancer deserves a sequel, especially since it didn't really delve into the interesting backstory or culture of the colonies (American, Japanese, German, British and Hispanic exiles from earth).
 
2012-05-05 09:07:26 PM
#2 has already been done on iOS. It is "Harry Potter Spells" though. You can either cast spells by gesturing with the phone or by making an inscription on the screen.

All it needs to be ported to Kinect. or maybe Wii.
 
2012-05-05 09:10:54 PM
I thought the first entry about the zombie game with open-ended options sounded pretty cool. I'd buy it. Don't care for the multiplayer aspect, but the original idea sounded fun. Fallout 3 has this popular mod (the name has escaped me) where you built your own 'fort' and populated it and such. The idea of merging, say, Skyrim with Sims 3, is kind'a cool. Build your house, build the town, kill the raiders that come to take it over. Meh. Sounded good to me, anyway.
 
2012-05-05 09:15:01 PM
I'm glad this guy finally got the appeal of zombies. He also seems to realize their time is over, too. Quite unfortunate. It was never the zombies that were scary but the collapse of current society they created! BAH!

the subtle thriller could/should be done. I don't want to spoil anything but in recent memory A Cabin in the Woods did a pretty decent job of it. Things are kinda weird, scary then a whole load more scary. Wouldn't be too tough to do.

Apparently all these ideas are from their forums, though so it would make sense that some of them are actually not crap like most of cracked articles.
 
2012-05-05 09:16:27 PM
I'd rather have more Kyle Katarn games than Han Solo games, because I'd rather be in Jan Ors' cockpit than have Chewbacca in mine.
 
2012-05-05 09:21:56 PM
Han Solo, the game:

upload.wikimedia.org

/Desperately needs a remake
 
2012-05-05 09:28:46 PM
Nice to see ETERNAL DARKNESS get a mention.
 
2012-05-05 09:38:37 PM

Practical_Draconian: mactobain: Beerguy: WRONG.


Freelancer deserves a sequel, especially since it didn't really delve into the interesting backstory or culture of the colonies (American, Japanese, German, British and Hispanic exiles from earth).



I completely agree with you. I know some 'flight sim' type gamers didn't think the flight controls were advanced enough, but I thought it was a great game..still do. The fact that Lancer's Reactor type mod sites are out there 9 years after the game was released is a good indication how awesome the vanilla game was.
 
2012-05-05 09:39:39 PM
Those are some of the worst ideas for games I've ever heard.
 
2012-05-05 09:49:30 PM
At work I had a 'Star Trek' vs 'Star Wars' debate with a coworker, and I was on the pro-Star Trek side. My argument was Jar Jar Binks and the Star Wars dancing videos from Star Wars: Kinect.
 
2012-05-05 09:54:55 PM
Loved Eternal Darkness. A game with an M rating because it has a mature story, creepy things with the tv, there wasn't much bad about that.
 
2012-05-05 10:05:15 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

Only SW game worth playing.

/well, and the other two
 
2012-05-05 10:15:21 PM
ZeroCorpse
Han Solo, the game:

upload.wikimedia.org

/Desperately needs a remake


Some of the projects based on Vega Strike might be relevant to your interests (Privateer Remake, Gemini Gold, Parallel Universe).
 
2012-05-05 10:24:31 PM
kxs401
I would actually start playing video games if that wizard game were a real thing.

That game would never last because all the 13 year-old pimply l33t boys trying to show off would get constantly pwned by nimble-figured DeviantArt girls until the game is nothing but contests who can make the prettiest sparks and fireworks.
 
2012-05-05 10:27:47 PM

ZeroCorpse: Han Solo, the game:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 252x357]

/Desperately needs a remake


see this

mactobain: Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.


Agreed that SWG was an awesome game (SWGEmu is still live: Link), but in my opinion, the game most closely resembling what was described was 2003's Freelancer


and then see this

The Voice of Doom: ZeroCorpse
Han Solo, the game:

upload.wikimedia.org

/Desperately needs a remake

Some of the projects based on Vega Strike might be relevant to your interests (Privateer Remake, Gemini Gold, Parallel Universe).


Vega strike is fun but both VS and Free Lancer are at least 7+ years old. Surprised Microsoft has not done something with the Freelancer/Starlancer IP. At least create an Xbox game or something. Freelancer had the better story line, Privateer had the better open game play
 
2012-05-05 10:30:46 PM

ArcadianRefugee: Only SW game worth playing.

/well, and the other two


Dark Forces, Shadows of the Empire and Knights of the Old Republic disagree.
 
2012-05-05 10:33:37 PM

Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.

[mmorpg.ua image 640x449]

Luckily, the players decided to take the abandonware and remake the game themselves.

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 330x175]


OK, something I don't understand... they have a client, but it's command-line only? WTF? I thought the client would be a 3-D view of your world and characters. I haven't used a text interface for an online game since Trade Wars 2000 back in the BBS days (late 80s)
 
2012-05-05 10:44:01 PM
There was a Who Framed Roger Rabbit game (more or less), it was called Toonstruck. Even starred Christopher Lloyd.
 
2012-05-05 10:44:40 PM

Mugato: Dark Forces


Game was the shiat when it came out. "Dark Forces" and "Rise of the Triad", at least for my group of friends, were really under the radar at the time.

/Still like Triad better than Doom.....
//Dark Forces too for that matter
 
2012-05-05 11:07:35 PM

ZeroCorpse: Han Solo, the game:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 252x357]

/Desperately needs a remake


That was your Han Solo in space game right there. Had so much fun shooting cargo ships apart and then stealing their cargo. Also using the tractor beam I upgraded my ship with to suck in the surviving passengers and then sell them into slavery.
 
2012-05-05 11:10:23 PM

IanMoone: #2 has already been done on iOS. It is "Harry Potter Spells" though. You can either cast spells by gesturing with the phone or by making an inscription on the screen.

All it needs to be ported to Kinect. or maybe Wii.


If it's Harry Potter, it's not what the author described in #2.
 
2012-05-05 11:11:13 PM

ZeroCorpse: Han Solo, the game:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 252x357]

/Desperately needs a remake


You can buy it on GOG.com and it'll run on your modern computer.

/I loved that game.
 
2012-05-05 11:22:36 PM

LesserEvil: Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.

[mmorpg.ua image 640x449]

Luckily, the players decided to take the abandonware and remake the game themselves.

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 330x175]

OK, something I don't understand... they have a client, but it's command-line only? WTF? I thought the client would be a 3-D view of your world and characters. I haven't used a text interface for an online game since Trade Wars 2000 back in the BBS days (late 80s)


Gemstone IV and other MUDs are actually still alive and kicking. Interestingly, the same company that does Gemstone (Simutronics) developed the engine that BioWare used for Star Wars: The Old Republic.
 
2012-05-05 11:25:04 PM

ArcadianRefugee: [upload.wikimedia.org image 256x329]

Only SW game worth playing.

/well, and the other two


Tie-Fighter, man. Great game,
 
2012-05-05 11:32:08 PM
The most interesting flight sim concept ever, and Sierra couldn't pull it off:

Aces: X-fighters
 
2012-05-05 11:37:42 PM
I'd like to see an MMO where you only get one life, and where the consequences of your actions are permanent to your storyline. Get killed and that's it, you're dead. Sure you can still play, but you're playing as an entirely new character. Fail a mission and you're going to have to live with the consequences of that failure because you can't just keep doing it over and over again until you finally succeed.
 
2012-05-05 11:44:01 PM

Tyrone Slothrop: There was a Who Framed Roger Rabbit game (more or less), it was called Toonstruck. Even starred Christopher Lloyd.


There was a Roger Rabbit game called, Who Framed Roger Rabbit and you played as Eddie. Granted it wasn't like L.A. Noir, but still.
 
2012-05-05 11:46:09 PM
Been playing a fair amount of Dead Island lately, and while it's fun, especially when played with two or three buddies (NOT randoms) it really makes me wish for the zombie game described in the first entry. It'll never happen, but done right it could be amazing. Hell, have the zombies follow Max Brooks rules. No running, attracted by sound, moan if they see you which attracts other zombies, etc. PERSISTENT FREAKING WORLD. No going through a door then back out only to see that the zombie you killed feeding on the corpse over there has been miraculously brought back.

Also it's pretty clear that most of the Dead Island survivors you encounter will not last very long. I like the idea of a game being set well after the zombies appeared, not in the first few days.
 
2012-05-05 11:49:11 PM

elchip: LesserEvil: Beerguy: WRONG.

We had that game, until Sony ruined it. It was called Star Wars Galaxies.

[mmorpg.ua image 640x449]

Luckily, the players decided to take the abandonware and remake the game themselves.

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 330x175]

OK, something I don't understand... they have a client, but it's command-line only? WTF? I thought the client would be a 3-D view of your world and characters. I haven't used a text interface for an online game since Trade Wars 2000 back in the BBS days (late 80s)

Gemstone IV and other MUDs are actually still alive and kicking. Interestingly, the same company that does Gemstone (Simutronics) developed the engine that BioWare used for Star Wars: The Old Republic.


TOR's engine is an awful MMO engine. Not sure what that says about the company.
 
2012-05-05 11:54:43 PM

UNC_Samurai: The most interesting flight sim concept ever, and Sierra couldn't pull it off:

Aces: X-fighters


I wish I could recall the specifics, but there was a WWII flight combat sim that was hyped as an MMO that would include the B-52 as its crown jewel. You could play in a fighter or other craft, but the B-52 would have you form a flight crew with your buddies. Every position in the aircraft would be covered: pilot, co-pilot, communications, navigator, bombardier, gun positions, all carried out by different people, and all voice-linked. The idea was that the better each crewman got at his position, the better the team would work as a whole to carry out their mission. Anyone could take over the position of anyone else who got hit and killed, but if you're a gunner who doesn't know dick about navigation, you're just SOL. It encouraged tight team gameplay, and included other players flying bomber escort on your bomb group's wing, and others on the offensive against you.

IIRC, funding was running out on the project, so they made it a single-player, offline game that sucked in comparison to the promises made. I'd still love to see that concept realized; it sounds like a lot of fun.
 
2012-05-05 11:54:48 PM

Ghastly: I'd like to see an MMO where you only get one life, and where the consequences of your actions are permanent to your storyline. Get killed and that's it, you're dead. Sure you can still play, but you're playing as an entirely new character. Fail a mission and you're going to have to live with the consequences of that failure because you can't just keep doing it over and over again until you finally succeed.


That would be too close to a simulator of my love life.
 
2012-05-06 12:04:21 AM
I get plenty of zombie killing kicks in Saints Row the third.
 
2012-05-06 12:06:20 AM
Damn...I just lost The Game.
 
2012-05-06 12:10:12 AM

ZeroCorpse: Han Solo, the game:

upload.wikimedia.org

/Desperately needs a remake


FTFY
 
2012-05-06 12:12:55 AM
You know, while there are some stinkers, there are a lot of great games in the Star Wars Universe. I think X-Wing vs. Tie-Fighter and KOTOR are my favorites.
 
2012-05-06 12:25:34 AM

Ghastly: I'd like to see an MMO where you only get one life, and where the consequences of your actions are permanent to your storyline. Get killed and that's it, you're dead.


Yes, because a game where you lose 80+ hours of work due to a sudden internet disconnection would go over so well with everyone.
 
2012-05-06 12:28:47 AM

IanMoone: #2 has already been done on iOS. It is "Harry Potter Spells" though. You can either cast spells by gesturing with the phone or by making an inscription on the screen.

All it needs to be ported to Kinect. or maybe Wii.



First thing that #2 made me think of was Naruto & its hand seals...
 
2012-05-06 12:38:37 AM
i291.photobucket.com

The Force will be with you.... Always.
 
2012-05-06 12:41:39 AM

PillsHere: Those are some of the worst ideas for games I've ever heard.


As a game developer, I've heard worse.
But some of those were pretty bad.

Survival-focused zombie game was probably the best suggestion of the bunch. And there's been efforts to make that kind of game... just not AAA efforts.
 
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