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(Boing Boing)   A comprehensive summary of all the good things the TSA has been up to the last few weeks   (boingboing.net ) divider line
    More: Fail, San Diego TSA, Boing Boing, organized crimes  
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11625 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2012 at 1:45 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-03 01:47:39 PM  
Is there anyone not making money of of the existence of the TSA who thinks these fu*ktards are a good idea?

And before any asshole comes in here with that tired old canard about "b--b--but if an aero plane did get blowed up you'd blame the TSA for not searching everyone's anus!! Hurrr." I believe that reasonable security measures are necessary for airline safety, and I also believe that they were already in place before 9-11.

9-11 did not occur because I carried a 3" pocket knife with me before the event, it happened because passengers and crew were trained to react passively in a hostage situation. That bullsh*t absolutely does not play anymore, and there are plenty of examples of passengers and crew working together to subdue a threat that prove it.

This new attitude of vigilance, combined with locking the cockpit door and air marshals have solved the problem as well as it can be solved. The TSA is a bloated corpse around the neck of productive and affordable air travel.

Fu*k every single one of them.
 
2012-05-03 01:50:46 PM  
Done in one.
 
2012-05-03 01:50:55 PM  
Billions and billions harassed

/ Terroists caught: zero
 
2012-05-03 01:51:36 PM  
I doubt if it's comprehensive since there are only six instances listed. But Jesus, who do they think they are, the Gestapo??
 
2012-05-03 01:53:33 PM  

FuzedBox: Done in one.


Note to mods: pressing the Smart button doesn't work if that is the only post so far. Thank FSM that FuzedBox and ParaHandy came to the rescue!
 
2012-05-03 01:54:28 PM  

bikerbob59: I doubt if it's comprehensive since there are only six instances listed. But Jesus, who do they think they are, the Gestapo??


The TSA couldn't carry the Gestapo's jock.
 
2012-05-03 01:54:31 PM  
images.fanpop.com
images.politico.com
 
2012-05-03 01:55:15 PM  
Oh yeah? well, TSA came to my house, bought a bunch of Pay Per View boxing matches, exploded a burrito in my microwave, raped my cat, and called my mom collect & shouted obscenities at her!

This is an outrage!
 
2012-05-03 01:55:17 PM  
Boy, I can't wait until terrorists start blowing up those giant lines at the airport.
 
2012-05-03 01:56:19 PM  
Also don't forget that all of this is being paid for with your own money.
 
2012-05-03 01:57:01 PM  
Keeping America Safe!™
 
2012-05-03 01:57:45 PM  
Lies, all lies. the TSA are doing what they do for us. And this is the thanks they get!

Yes, I keed.

/nothing against the TSA people in general. most seem decent.
//they are an abomination of a organization led by a coont
///despite calling them "officers", they are the federal equivalent of mall cops
 
2012-05-03 01:58:08 PM  
I never would have believed this could happen in my lifetime,
 
2012-05-03 02:01:10 PM  
blah, blah, blah...

and how many planes were blown up?

I rest my case.

Don't ever forget the TSA is feeling up grandma for YOUR safety.
 
2012-05-03 02:02:01 PM  
"It's called Homeland Security because Fatherland was already under copyright"
 
2012-05-03 02:02:36 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: Boy, I can't wait until terrorists start blowing up those giant lines at the airport.


"From now on, we at the TSA are bringing you, the valued customer, a safer way to fly. In a follow-up to our wildly successful and popular 3-1-1 rule, we will be extending that easy to follow number to 3-1-1-1: 3 oz, 1 quart, 1 person, 1 personal TSA attendant to accompany you from the moment you step foot in the terminal to the moment you safely walk out of your destination terminal. All flights will now be required double-booking, one for you, one for your PTSA. We're calling Blue Skies: Coast to Coast! We can't wait to accompany you!"
 
2012-05-03 02:09:45 PM  

Calmamity: Is there anyone not making money of of the existence of the TSA who thinks these fu*ktards are a good idea?

And before any asshole comes in here with that tired old canard about "b--b--but if an aero plane did get blowed up you'd blame the TSA for not searching everyone's anus!! Hurrr." I believe that reasonable security measures are necessary for airline safety, and I also believe that they were already in place before 9-11.

9-11 did not occur because I carried a 3" pocket knife with me before the event, it happened because passengers and crew were trained to react passively in a hostage situation. That bullsh*t absolutely does not play anymore, and there are plenty of examples of passengers and crew working together to subdue a threat that prove it.

This new attitude of vigilance, combined with locking the cockpit door and air marshals have solved the problem as well as it can be solved. The TSA is a bloated corpse around the neck of productive and affordable air travel.

Fu*k every single one of them.


Don't hold back - how do you really feel? :-)
 
2012-05-03 02:11:13 PM  
I just spent a couple of weeks touring China and we went through security there, including going to and coming from Tibet, several times. It is just like here except more professional and less of a power trip. Scan bag, walk through magnetometer, wanding and a light pat down. When they found something, I had a water bottle in my carry on and my daughter had a battery in her check luggage they didn't make a big deal about it just visually double checked.
 
2012-05-03 02:11:45 PM  

DavidVincent: "It's called Homeland Security because Fatherland was already under copyright"


Heimat Sicherheit
 
2012-05-03 02:12:42 PM  
Copied from the comments below the article I think this says it best:

In 2001, one man - Richard Reed, tried to set blow up an airplane with a bomb hidden in his shoes. Since then, 800 million passengers a year have to take our shoes off before we board an airplane. In 2009 another man - Umar Farouk Abdoulmutallab - tried to blow up another airplane with a bomb hidden in his underware. Since them, 800 million passengers a year are (virtually) undressed by the TSA each time we fly. Neither terrorist was caught by the TSA. What is next??

Well don't tell the TSA about the guy who had a butt bomb shoved up his butt or else we will all be experiencing body cavity searches soon.
 
2012-05-03 02:12:51 PM  

Calmamity: Is there anyone not making money of of the existence of the TSA who thinks these fu*ktards are a good idea?

And before any asshole comes in here with that tired old canard about "b--b--but if an aero plane did get blowed up you'd blame the TSA for not searching everyone's anus!! Hurrr." I believe that reasonable security measures are necessary for airline safety, and I also believe that they were already in place before 9-11.

9-11 did not occur because I carried a 3" pocket knife with me before the event, it happened because passengers and crew were trained to react passively in a hostage situation. That bullsh*t absolutely does not play anymore, and there are plenty of examples of passengers and crew working together to subdue a threat that prove it.

This new attitude of vigilance, combined with locking the cockpit door and air marshals have solved the problem as well as it can be solved. The TSA is a bloated corpse around the neck of productive and affordable air travel.

Fu*k every single one of them.


so much this. I was detained at Logan yesterday for about 20 minutes because i had asked the TSA person to explain to me what she was doing when she insisted on wiping my hands with some sort of chemical pads. I continually refused to allow her to and kept asking nicely to explain what this was and what they were doing. She refused and was indignant. I finally said "the TSA is a bunch of farking aholes". TSA person flipped, called in the state police to deal with me. Had a nice time chatting with the MASS state patrol while we watched these clowns run around for 20 minutes trying to come up with something to charge me with, make threats to ruin my life etc. The state patrol agreed, they are all a bunch of farking aholes. We had a good laugh and a nice talk, eventually things calmed down and i was allowed to pass through the gate, but what a show. Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.
 
2012-05-03 02:17:51 PM  
You are not the issue. Disrupted commerce is the issue. You are trivia, aside from being consuming fodder for the commerce.
 
2012-05-03 02:17:55 PM  

adammpower: so much this. I was detained at Logan yesterday for about 20 minutes because i had asked the TSA person to explain to me what she was doing when she insisted on wiping my hands with some sort of chemical pads. I continually refused to allow her to and kept asking nicely to explain what this was and what they were doing. She refused and was indignant. I finally said "the TSA is a bunch of farking aholes". TSA person flipped, called in the state police to deal with me. Had a nice time chatting with the MASS state patrol while we watched these clowns run around for 20 minutes trying to come up with something to charge me with, make threats to ruin my life etc. The state patrol agreed, they are all a bunch of farking aholes. We had a good laugh and a nice talk, eventually things calmed down and i was allowed to pass through the gate, but what a show. Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.



You turned that down?!!!
Jesus, that stuff is awesome-like LSD/heroin level awesome ... are you crazy?
 
2012-05-03 02:19:46 PM  
www.getmikeyoffthelist.com
 
2012-05-03 02:21:39 PM  

PeterPipersPickledPecker: [www.getmikeyoffthelist.com image 328x248]


Going from Nassau to Newark? Not much of an improvement.
 
2012-05-03 02:23:00 PM  
what the near future will look like...
bananafeed.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-05-03 02:23:26 PM  
personally, i think that the 5th amendment and my rectal privacy is a small price to pay in exchange for satisfying the baby boomer's cowardice.
 
2012-05-03 02:24:14 PM  

DavidVincent: I never would have believed this could happen in my lifetime,


Really? When I was a dumb teen back in the 80s I thought we'd have military rule by the 90s.
In a cynical way I'm actually impressed with the more subtle, systemic approach.
 
2012-05-03 02:26:41 PM  
"anomaly in the crotchital area" of a 79-year-old woman.

See, when you use quotes, you're quoting somebody. You can't just change words to make them sound funny.

Was really hoping somebody in the TSA used the word "crotchital".
 
2012-05-03 02:32:31 PM  
I will vote for whatever presidential candidate promises to take all these farktards out behind the barn and put them down. Sadly I'll probably have to come up with other criteria for my vote.
 
2012-05-03 02:34:41 PM  

adammpower: I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands


Probably wiping them down to check for explosives residue. They should have told you when you asked.
 
2012-05-03 02:37:49 PM  

Joafu: The My Little Pony Killer: Boy, I can't wait until terrorists start blowing up those giant lines at the airport.

"From now on, we at the TSA are bringing you, the valued customer, a safer way to fly. In a follow-up to our wildly successful and popular 3-1-1 rule, we will be extending that easy to follow number to 3-1-1-1: 3 oz, 1 quart, 1 person, 1 personal TSA attendant to accompany you from the moment you step foot in the terminal to the moment you safely walk out of your destination terminal. All flights will now be required double-booking, one for you, one for your PTSA. We're calling Blue Skies: Coast to Coast! We can't wait to accompany you!"


And that's why Amtrak and Zipcar serve my travelling needs.
 
2012-05-03 02:45:32 PM  

LordOfThePings: "anomaly in the crotchital area" of a 79-year-old woman.

See, when you use quotes, you're quoting somebody. You can't just change words to make them sound funny.

Was really hoping somebody in the TSA used the word "crotchital".


And besides, everyone knows the proper medical terminology is "groinular district."
 
2012-05-03 02:46:08 PM  

Joafu: The My Little Pony Killer: Boy, I can't wait until terrorists start blowing up those giant lines at the airport.

"From now on, we at the TSA are bringing you, the valued customer, a safer way to fly. In a follow-up to our wildly successful and popular 3-1-1 rule, we will be extending that easy to follow number to 3-1-1-1: 3 oz, 1 quart, 1 person, 1 personal TSA attendant to accompany you from the moment you step foot in the terminal to the moment you safely walk out of your destination terminal. All flights will now be required double-booking, one for you, one for your PTSA. We're calling Blue Skies: Coast to Coast! We can't wait to accompany you!"


That will probably also make it easier for them to rob you.
 
2012-05-03 02:49:45 PM  

Robo Beat: LordOfThePings: "anomaly in the crotchital area" of a 79-year-old woman.

See, when you use quotes, you're quoting somebody. You can't just change words to make them sound funny.

Was really hoping somebody in the TSA used the word "crotchital".

And besides, everyone knows the proper medical terminology is "groinular district."


Ventral Fiscal Orifice or "Wizard's Sleeve"
 
2012-05-03 03:02:58 PM  
My favorite theing abotu the TSA and the brilliant no-fly list is the security triangle.

Anyone on the no-fly list with a printer can sidestep the no-fly list.
 
2012-05-03 03:09:57 PM  

buckler: adammpower: I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands

Probably wiping them down to check for explosives residue. They should have told you when you asked.


They wiped my hands last time I flew. This was on the way home from Dallas. I asked (out of curiosity, not protest, because dammit I just wanted to go home) and the agent just said it was due to the way I packed my bag. I was carrying the usual gadgets -- laptop, cell phone, MP3 player, digital camera -- and all of them have associated chords, so... I guess all those wires looked odd in the X-Ray machine?

The same carry-on didn't trigger any hand-wiping scrutiny before the to flight, though, which is interesting. Smaller, more relaxed airport, maybe. You'd think they'd at least be consistent, agency-wide. (Hah.)

I have nothing against the TSA agents individually. Most of them are just people doing their jobs as best they can under whatever stupid guidelines they have to follow. It probably helps that the first agent I met on that trip was a woman I'd known (and liked) since elementary school. She actually apologized for asking to see my ID. I had to laugh at that. Made the whole (surprisingly easy) process easier.
 
2012-05-03 03:10:18 PM  

adammpower: Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.


Nothing. They were likely swabbing your hands with a dry bit of cotton, which they would then run a test on to see if it detected NItrates. Common ingredient of bomb making materials. It will also catch you if you've been shooting guns in the last 48 hours or been doing some gardening.
 
2012-05-03 03:14:55 PM  
They Steal Anything
 
2012-05-03 03:15:10 PM  

ShawnDoc: adammpower: Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.

Nothing. They were likely swabbing your hands with a dry bit of cotton, which they would then run a test on to see if it detected NItrates. Common ingredient of bomb making materials. It will also catch you if you've been shooting guns in the last 48 hours or been doing some gardening.


So, no bacon for breakfast before flying - check!
 
2012-05-03 03:15:23 PM  
www.5squalityposters.com

I wonder what the feds will do next?
 
2012-05-03 03:19:45 PM  

Mr.Tangent: blah, blah, blah...

and how many planes were blown up?

I rest my case.

Don't ever forget the TSA is feeling up grandma for YOUR safety.


Wow...unless your post needs that non-existent sarcasm font, you really should lay off the Kool-Aid.
 
2012-05-03 03:23:37 PM  
Think of it this way. It's less freedom the terrorists can hate us for.
 
2012-05-03 03:28:29 PM  
Allow us to waive the governments/airlines responsibility and fly without a proctological exam.

<--- to Sheeple Gates | to Hero Gates --->
 
2012-05-03 03:33:18 PM  
If people would just STOP FLYING, the airlines would eventually force congress to disband the TSA. And don't give me that BS about that not being a practical suggestion. Business travel is the only legit reason to fly, otherwise, take a train, a bus, or drive. If everyone vacationing or visiting relatives or whatever - basically anything not business related - would stop caving in to the desire for convenience and stop giving the airlines their money (while letting the airlines know that it is the TSA that motivates them not to fly), things would change. That won't happen though because this is America, and while we talk a good game about freedom and liberty, everyone knows that for most people it is just too much trouble to actually fight for those things. It's easier to just "go along to get along."
 
2012-05-03 03:50:23 PM  

adammpower: so much this. I was detained at Logan yesterday for about 20 minutes because i had asked the TSA person to explain to me what she was doing when she insisted on wiping my hands with some sort of chemical pads. I continually refused to allow her to and kept asking nicely to explain what this was and what they were doing. She refused and was indignant. I finally said "the TSA is a bunch of farking aholes". TSA person flipped, called in the state police to deal with me. Had a nice time chatting with the MASS state patrol while we watched these clowns run around for 20 minutes trying to come up with something to charge me with, make threats to ruin my life etc. The state patrol agreed, they are all a bunch of farking aholes. We had a good laugh and a nice talk, eventually things calmed down and i was allowed to pass through the gate, but what a show. Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.


You harrassed (for lack of a better word) a TSA agent, refused to cooperate, waited for the police to show up, chatted up the cop, and were finaly cleared in 20 minutes? I need to farking roll with you. I can't even get through the farking line when everything is going right is less than 30.
 
2012-05-03 03:55:42 PM  

lisarenee3505: If people would just STOP FLYING, the airlines would eventually force congress to disband the TSA. And don't give me that BS about that not being a practical suggestion. Business travel is the only legit reason to fly, otherwise, take a train, a bus, or drive. If everyone vacationing or visiting relatives or whatever - basically anything not business related - would stop caving in to the desire for convenience and stop giving the airlines their money (while letting the airlines know that it is the TSA that motivates them not to fly), things would change.


My brother just got married in yosemite, Ilive in Md. A train bus or driving isn't practical, but thanks for playing.
 
2012-05-03 03:58:54 PM  

MythDragon: adammpower: so much this. I was detained at Logan yesterday for about 20 minutes because i had asked the TSA person to explain to me what she was doing when she insisted on wiping my hands with some sort of chemical pads. I continually refused to allow her to and kept asking nicely to explain what this was and what they were doing. She refused and was indignant. I finally said "the TSA is a bunch of farking aholes". TSA person flipped, called in the state police to deal with me. Had a nice time chatting with the MASS state patrol while we watched these clowns run around for 20 minutes trying to come up with something to charge me with, make threats to ruin my life etc. The state patrol agreed, they are all a bunch of farking aholes. We had a good laugh and a nice talk, eventually things calmed down and i was allowed to pass through the gate, but what a show. Farking aholes all of them. I still don't know what they were attempting to wipe on my hands.

You harrassed (for lack of a better word) a TSA agent, refused to cooperate, waited for the police to show up, chatted up the cop, and were finaly cleared in 20 minutes? I need to farking roll with you. I can't even get through the farking line when everything is going right is less than 30.


Hahaha. When you put it that way it does sound kind of triumphant. Let me be your tour guide!
 
2012-05-03 04:02:04 PM  

lisarenee3505: If people would just STOP FLYING, the airlines would eventually force congress to disband the TSA. And don't give me that BS about that not being a practical suggestion. Business travel is the only legit reason to fly, otherwise, take a train, a bus, or drive. If everyone vacationing or visiting relatives or whatever - basically anything not business related - would stop caving in to the desire for convenience and stop giving the airlines their money (while letting the airlines know that it is the TSA that motivates them not to fly), things would change. That won't happen though because this is America, and while we talk a good game about freedom and liberty, everyone knows that for most people it is just too much trouble to actually fight for those things. It's easier to just "go along to get along."


Who the f**k are you to determine that?
 
2012-05-03 04:17:45 PM  

lisarenee3505: If people would just STOP FLYING, the airlines would eventually force congress to disband the TSA. And don't give me that BS about that not being a practical suggestion. Business travel is the only legit reason to fly, otherwise, take a train, a bus, or drive. If everyone vacationing or visiting relatives or whatever - basically anything not business related - would stop caving in to the desire for convenience and stop giving the airlines their money (while letting the airlines know that it is the TSA that motivates them not to fly), things would change. That won't happen though because this is America, and while we talk a good game about freedom and liberty, everyone knows that for most people it is just too much trouble to actually fight for those things. It's easier to just "go along to get along."


Around 1990, around half of Americans then alive had never left their home STATE, far less the country. You may be one of them.

I live in Austin, TX but Mrs PH and I go back home and visit my father at least once a year. It's a biatch of a drive to Scotland.
 
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