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(Fark)   My wife asks me last night: "Would you be freaked out if someone you were dating told you they were a post-op transsexual?" So now, I pose this question to you   (fark.com) divider line 296
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6135 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2012 at 1:21 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-03 01:35:11 PM
Mrs.Kritter has not slept in my bed in 10 years. Not even a hug or a kiss or holding hands since then. She spends almost all her free time with co-worker 'friends' going on day trips, or staying at a house she rents upstate where i'm neither invited or welcome.

I'd be thrilled to have some 'chicks with dicks' action going on the side.

/i'm so lonely
 
2012-05-03 01:35:26 PM
One of these is a post-op transgender, one is not. Take your pic.

www.a1social.com

s1.static.gotsmile.net


/extreme example, but 'should' answer it...
 
2012-05-03 01:35:31 PM

generalDisdain: Would it matter if they were born intersexed or were a Chimera?


how does sex work with that whole snake tail, lion body and goat head on the back work?
 
2012-05-03 01:36:09 PM
Is your wife dating someone?
 
2012-05-03 01:36:15 PM
As far as I know, MTF transsexuals don't get PMS, so that's a bonus.
 
2012-05-03 01:36:23 PM
How can this thread not have a Family Guy "Quagmire's Dad" reference?

/Off to find relevant links.
 
2012-05-03 01:36:56 PM
As a straight woman, I'd probably break up with them, but only because the woman to man surgery hasn't been perfected. We'd probably remain friends though.
 
2012-05-03 01:37:12 PM

LineNoise: So? Wouldn't someone like that want to date someone who wouldn't have a knee jerk reaction to something like that?


during the casually-thinking-about-dating phase? No, most people just don't want drama. If you tell them your parents lost their house and just moved in with you, or you're a vegan, or you're a republican, or you're a democrat, or any other number of things...that's just drama. The cutesy phase isn't the place for drama.

When should the person out themselves? Right as it is starting to get serious. Or, if the have sex long before serious...right the instant before sex. Because if they are jumping in to sex with you and then stop...that will take a lot for them to do, and if they go far enough to stop themselves then...it wouldn't have worked out.

Now, would I be shocked as hell? Considering my wife and I started dating when we were kids, I suppose I might be. I sortof watched her finish off puberty - as a girl - so it would be a neat trick if she started out as a guy.
 
2012-05-03 01:37:38 PM
It's not "freak out", but there's a strong chance I'd no longer be attracted to them.

This isn't a bigotry issue, it's just that for people who are solely attracted to one sex, there is definitely some sort of "switch" that flicks in how you look at someone when you discover they're not the gender you thought they were.

Yes, I totally support transsexuals being able to use their post-surgery gender as their "true" gender. But that doesn't change the the innate circuits in my brain that assign what I'm attracted to.

Obviously such a thing could easily be devastating to the other party as it undermines such a large part of who they are, so it would be a delicate let down.
 
2012-05-03 01:38:14 PM

rostit: from now on, TFD threads should not be greenlighted without a vote. this is stupid.


I'm a liter and this is the first time I've seen this question posed.

But anyway, why would you, as a TFer who is apparenlty forced to deal with 4 of these threads a week, care if it goes green and is thus exposed to the unwashed masses? Are you trying to spare us your pain?

/yes, I would be freaked out bigtime and end the relationship immediately.
 
2012-05-03 01:39:20 PM

Rain-Monkey: Subby, I have news for you.

You might want to sit down for this.


Fark is a post-op transsexual.

//couldn't let a setup like that go to waste
 
2012-05-03 01:40:13 PM
For a real answer: It wouldn't matter to me. I'm bisexual and have dated MTF pre-op transsexual before. We might still be together if she hadn't been far more of a party/club kid than I was (I prefer staying home with a book or a good movie).

But I would prefer they tell me up front. If I love you, I love you. And nothing would change that unless you cheated on me or were abusive. But I value honesty highly in a relationship since I can't read a lot of secondary social cues.
 
2012-05-03 01:42:27 PM
If you've had that operation, and you don't tell somebody about it before your first first kiss, you are a biatch/asshole.
 
2012-05-03 01:42:43 PM
I'd probably feel bad about it, but say no.

I mean, look, it would have to come up eventually if you talked about kids or having a family. I'm sure there's plenty of people who wouldn't care.

MTF tranny's have always had it rough. Think about it, you go into the hospital one day, and you walk out, and suddenly no one cares what you think and you make 80 cents on the dollar. It's horrifying.
 
2012-05-03 01:43:16 PM
Let me do the math...a woman, whom I am apprently attracted to, has a male sex drive and I can't get her pregnant on a bet. What's to get freaked out about?
 
2012-05-03 01:43:17 PM
I'd get a flashlight and some calipers, give it a full inspection, and be on my way...I mean, boobs are simple to fake, but a vagina?
 
2012-05-03 01:43:44 PM

RexNexus: Let me do the math...a woman, whom I am apprently attracted to, has a male sex drive and I can't get her pregnant on a bet. What's to get freaked out about?


your penis may be smaller then what she had oem
 
2012-05-03 01:43:59 PM
I suppose it would depend on whether if it's Tim Curry or not.
 
2012-05-03 01:44:36 PM
not in the least.
 
2012-05-03 01:44:47 PM
One important factor is children. If you are looking to settle down and really want biological children with your spouse, you should probably avoid dating a transsexual.
 
2012-05-03 01:45:06 PM
"Yo, Ricki, that's my girl, dawg. She ain't supposed to be havin' no penis."
 
2012-05-03 01:45:14 PM

Mrs.Sharpier: This too, why do we have this question all the time?


Because we don't yet know all there is to know about... the crying game?
 
2012-05-03 01:45:51 PM
I would be surprised that I didn't notice. especially if there was sex... there likely would have been, since, before I got married, I would stop seeing someone if there was no sex within the first couple dates. It's not a rule of mine, and it's not said to be cool... I just noticed that it is an historically accurate tendency. I don't think about it, but if there is no sex, I guess that means someone is not interested -- I don't like to pursue things were someone is not interested.

So, unless I was told on the first couple of dates, which are all 'getting to know you, do I like this person' anyways... in which case, there is nothing to freak out about. or, we had sex, and I didn't notice, which would probably lead me to the conclusion that, since naturally I don't care, I don't think I care intellectually either -- but damn, I am not very aware of other people.
 
2012-05-03 01:46:36 PM

pudgyv: He/she has the right to be what she wants. I, on the other hand, have the right to know about it if we're dating.


This.
 
2012-05-03 01:47:14 PM
I'd probably say "Well, you haven't seemed to mind so far, so I guess not."
 
2012-05-03 01:47:35 PM
Would you be freaked out? I have no idea. I don't know you.
 
2012-05-03 01:48:48 PM

loonatic112358: RexNexus: Let me do the math...a woman, whom I am apprently attracted to, has a male sex drive and I can't get her pregnant on a bet. What's to get freaked out about?

your penis may be smaller then what she had oem


How would I know and why would I care? Huge junk would probably be detrimental in that instance anyway.
 
2012-05-03 01:48:53 PM
Well, since I'm a 98% striaght chick (always leave room), they would be F to M and I think I we would have that disucssion before things went very far. But no, it would not freak me out. If I'm with someone I'm with them becuase I like them. I would be more concerned with the practicalities than what physical gender the person used to be.
 
2012-05-03 01:49:23 PM

Cybernetic: How can this thread not have a Family Guy "Quagmire's Dad" reference?

/Off to find relevant links.


0.tqn.com

It's gotta be a trainwreck down there. Just an absolute casserole of nonsense.
 
2012-05-03 01:49:39 PM
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How about this: my wife used to be a child -- a CHILD for heaven's sake! And I do her anyway. All the time.
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2012-05-03 01:49:58 PM

bigpete53: Not the submitter, but I know who the submitter is. This is a very real question by a very concerned TFer.

Just know, kwame, that I will support you no matter what you choose to do.


That might be one of the greatest Fark threads. I can't believe I lost the link. Anyone still have it?
 
2012-05-03 01:50:22 PM
200+ comments and no Ackbar?

What the heck is wrong with Fark today?!?!

images.wikia.com
 
2012-05-03 01:50:24 PM
Perhaps a little weirded out, but I'd make it all better by letting it know that I'm living with AIDS. Then I'd disappear from its life and never make contact with it again.
 
2012-05-03 01:52:57 PM

bigpete53: SandmanEsq: Quasar: I think lying to someone from the start of your relationship about a pretty big deal is a great way to build trust.

I don't know if witholding that piece of information can be called "lying". When you meet them, they are physiologically the gender they "appear" to be. Not telling you that they were physiologically the opposite gender previously before the first date is keeping something that may not become relevant to yourself. Now, should they disclose this before the relationship turns intimate? Probably, if for no other reason than if you cannot share information like that, you really should not be bumping ugly in the first place.

Dude, I wouldn't tell that random girl I hooked up with lots of things, let alone let her know about my inflatable penis.


What's that noise?
Air compressor.
In a hotel room?
Never mind.
 
2012-05-03 01:54:08 PM
I hate fake tits. I sure as shiat would hate a fake vagina.
 
2012-05-03 01:54:28 PM

ihatedumbpeople: One of these is a post-op transgender, one is not. Take your pic.



/extreme example, but 'should' answer it...



Which one of them is a liar? If it's the fat one, I'll take the blonde. If it's the blonde, I'll take neither.
 
2012-05-03 01:55:44 PM

LineNoise: We have this question every week.

Freak out? No. I don't think I would run around thinking I had cooties or caught the gay or something.

End things right there with them. Yes.


pudgyv: He/she has the right to be what she wants. I, on the other hand, have the right to know about it if we're dating.


^These.

You go with your bad self. If being 'transgendered' makes you happy, good for you. Seriously. Anything one can do to find their own slice of happiness I am all for.

However, I don't agree that repeated hormone injections and cosmetic surgery changes anything, so 'how about no'.
 
2012-05-03 01:57:00 PM
Well they feel different in the inside ...
 
2012-05-03 01:59:37 PM
I'd obviously be hungover, since any other state of consciousness would provide me with the ability to know what a post-op tranny feels like on the inside.

That, and lots and lots of experience.
 
2012-05-03 02:00:03 PM

generalDisdain: Green? LAME


this.
~~~~~~~
Can't y'all super-terffic TF'ers get some better shait 'greened'? While many crumbs can make a meal, we'd like a taste of steak sometimes, dammit. Show some love!

I imagine being a TF'er is like drinking from a fire hose of sewage. Sure, you can get a chunk of good stuff occasionally, but at what cost?
 
2012-05-03 02:04:12 PM

thejoyofpi: If I already like them in that way, I don't see how finding out about a surgery would make any difference


Depends how far along you are.

If you planned on having kids that would be a big deal.

If they talked a lot about growing up past boyfriends, etc and that all turned out to be a lie, big deal.

SandmanEsq: When you meet them, they are physiologically the gender they "appear" to be.


No they have the appeareance of the gender they "feel" they are.
 
2012-05-03 02:04:49 PM
How soon we forget

www.newsgab.com

for your eyes only
 
2012-05-03 02:08:46 PM
1: Is your wife setting you up for a surprise?
2: Yes, Yes, a million times Yes!
 
2012-05-03 02:11:52 PM

abfalter: 200+ comments and no Ackbar?

What the heck is wrong with Fark today?!?!

[images.wikia.com image 299x245]


Thanks, now I'm hungry.
 
2012-05-03 02:13:31 PM

the_rev: I wouldn't "freak out" like throw my hands up and run around in circles screaming like a girl scout, but I would become single, right on the spot.


I'll take one "running around with my hands in the air like a girl scout" option, please.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-03 02:13:55 PM
Wife:
"Would you be freaked out if someone you were dating told you they were a post-op transsexual?"

Husband:
"Well honey, that depends. Would you be freaked out if someone you were married to told you they were a post-op transsexual?"
 
2012-05-03 02:15:33 PM
If I like the person enough and I'm genuinely attracted to them then I see no issue.

I'm gay and don't want kids, so I'm probably a bit more open minded. If you wanted kids though, it would probably be a bigger concern.
 
2012-05-03 02:17:51 PM
to those wanting kids and using it as an excuse:

adopt.


A secondary thought:

if your partner was the gender they were born and they were infertile for whatever reason, would you just dump then when you found out despite the love you have for them? No?

then adopt and STFU. Your argument holds no water.
 
2012-05-03 02:20:57 PM

HailRobonia: One important factor is children. If you are looking to settle down and really want biological children with your spouse, you should probably avoid dating a transsexual.


with the rampant overpopulation problems we have, I really don't see this as a factor in the least bit. Want to have kids, but think your tranny GF is hot? Adopt.
 
2012-05-03 02:21:28 PM
No, quite the opposite, actually. I quite like the idea of dating a guy who turns out to have a vagina.

Modified wooden toilet roller? Wow. Just wow.
 
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