If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Slate)   My 19 year old niece made a porno, should I tell her mother? No. You should send me the link   (slate.com) divider line 286
    More: Obvious, Emily Yoffe, pornographic actor, maiden voyages, nieces, security experts, porn  
•       •       •

31868 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2012 at 2:04 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



286 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-05-03 04:48:27 PM  
Guessing she used her real name if her aunt/uncle could find her so quickly. Either that or the relative was familiar enough with the site already to do a search by actress.
 
2012-05-03 04:55:03 PM  

CapnPlaty: Guessing she used her real name if her aunt/uncle could find her so quickly. Either that or the relative was familiar enough with the site already to do a search by actress.


My guess is a quick trip to /r/.
 
2012-05-03 04:56:51 PM  
bie?

eip
 
2012-05-03 05:03:10 PM  

Cosmoboy: Once you find her, I bet she looks like Brienne of Tarth.


Challenge accepted.jpg

img.poptower.com

/http://www.ugo.com/girls/hot-girls-in-chainmail
//http://www.chainmailgirl.com/
//http://utopia-armoury.deviantart.com/art/Hot-Girls-in-Chainmail-Bik i nis-127975222
//http://www.fark.com/comments/92057/Hot-babes-in-chainmail
///sorry about all the links.
 
2012-05-03 05:10:35 PM  
"Usually I have to go to website to see this type of thing, like naked wrestling giantesses dot com."
theronneel.com
 
2012-05-03 05:12:45 PM  

bill4935: Cosmoboy: Once you find her, I bet she looks like Brienne of Tarth.


Challenge accepted.jpg

[img.poptower.com image 300x202]

/http://www.ugo.com/girls/hot-girls-in-chainmail
//http://www.chainmailgirl.com/
//http://utopia-armoury.deviantart.com/art/Hot-Girls-in-Chainmail-Bik i nis-127975222
//http://www.fark.com/comments/92057/Hot-babes-in-chainmail
///sorry about all the links.


Wait, is that the chick? Like the chick from the article?
 
2012-05-03 05:13:46 PM  
i fear for humanity! the rest of the photos? i fear for kittens...
mimg.ugo.com
 
2012-05-03 05:15:19 PM  
barelylegal.com

Emma Mae? Can't find her stats, but she's got long legs(dunno about 6'2, but bound to be taller than the average girl), some tattoos, and looks young enough to fit the bill
 
2012-05-03 05:15:34 PM  
No, really, where are the links?
 
2012-05-03 05:17:00 PM  

bhcompy: [barelylegal.com image 458x344]

Emma Mae? Can't find her stats, but she's got long legs(dunno about 6'2, but bound to be taller than the average girl), some tattoos, and looks young enough to fit the bill


She's got a nice ski-ramp goin on. Slopes down the back, then up the ass! Combine that with the sleeve, and her teeny tiny head.

2/10 would not bang.

Sans tattoo though? Maybe a 6/10.
 
2012-05-03 05:19:53 PM  

CapnPlaty: Guessing she used her real name if her aunt/uncle could find her so quickly. Either that or the relative was familiar enough with the site already to do a search by actress.


Fake uncle
Fake girl
Fake situation
Fake controversy
Web site for morans
Real page hits
 
2012-05-03 05:21:32 PM  
I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.
 
2012-05-03 05:26:24 PM  
Huh, you would think it would be easy finding a tall hot blonde tattood porn girl. Especially since most of them are tiny enough to stick in your pocket...
 
2012-05-03 05:27:02 PM  
What is the fascination with boinking crazy?

Believe me, it's not what it's cracked up to be, pro or con. I sublet part of my house some 25 years ago to a woman who turned out to have escaped from a nuthouse. Really. She was also a pretty damn sharp con artist, although she never bilked me out of anything but a couple of month's rent. In exchange I got a little nookie. It was like punching a tree. All the activity of a fresh corpse. She scarpered one day and left behind a few boxes of quack medicine she'd been hawking on the side. I sold 'em and made back most of the rent money.
 
2012-05-03 05:27:10 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


Your answer is more than obvious...

Blackmail!!! If she's willing to do stuff on camera, imagine what she'd be willing to do OFF camera. yeaaaaaa
 
2012-05-03 05:27:44 PM  
I love how Prudence immediately assumes that the girl in question regrets her career choice, wants to get out, and is ashamed of it.

There's nothing indicating that any of these things are true in the original letter. The only negative mentioned is that people are bullying her on a social media site.

But old Prude there just decides that porn is teh evil and went off on a tangent. Her name is perfect. Prudence, indeed.
 
2012-05-03 05:29:28 PM  

Strategeryz0r: bhcompy: [barelylegal.com image 458x344]

Emma Mae? Can't find her stats, but she's got long legs(dunno about 6'2, but bound to be taller than the average girl), some tattoos, and looks young enough to fit the bill

She's got a nice ski-ramp goin on. Slopes down the back, then up the ass! Combine that with the sleeve, and her teeny tiny head.

2/10 would not bang.

Sans tattoo though? Maybe a 6/10.


Well, if I had a choice of tall porn stars, it would be Faith Leon.
 
2012-05-03 05:29:44 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


www.gearseds.com

That must be some weird porn.
 
2012-05-03 05:30:21 PM  

MBooda: What is the fascination with boinking crazy?

Believe me, it's not what it's cracked up to be, pro or con. I sublet part of my house some 25 years ago to a woman who turned out to have escaped from a nuthouse. Really. She was also a pretty damn sharp con artist, although she never bilked me out of anything but a couple of month's rent. In exchange I got a little nookie. It was like punching a tree. All the activity of a fresh corpse. She scarpered one day and left behind a few boxes of quack medicine she'd been hawking on the side. I sold 'em and made back most of the rent money.


Wrong kind of crazy. There's a difference between escaped from the nuthouse/con artist-y crazy. And writing YOU WILL LOVE ME!! in shaving cream on the hood of your car crazy.

The former does just enough to get what they want. The latter does EVERYTHING they feel they need to do to keep you around.

That's why crazy sex is best sex. You just have to take your crazy in moderation.
 
2012-05-03 05:31:29 PM  
But dude, you looked at your niece doing porn. Ok, I probably would have looked at my 19 year old niece doing porn (but it was the wife's sister's girl) so that makes it OK, right? Right? RIGHT?!?
 
2012-05-03 05:31:36 PM  

ZeroCorpse: That must be some weird porn.


maybe he gets a charge out of watching them spin

shocking I know, I can't figure out the positives to it, mho power to him though
 
2012-05-03 05:32:53 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


I love that site. This is one of my favorite performers.

NSFW
 
2012-05-03 05:34:00 PM  

loonatic112358: ZeroCorpse: That must be some weird porn.

maybe he gets a charge out of watching them spin

shocking I know, I can't figure out the positives to it, mho power to him though


Well, spinner is a valid sexual term for a type of girl. Guess she's one of them
 
2012-05-03 05:39:30 PM  

ZeroCorpse: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.

www.gearseds.com

That must be some weird porn.


The prototype for the world's first IUD?

Man, no wonder the pill was so revolutionary.
 
2012-05-03 05:53:59 PM  
What's the point of searching this person out? Every woman you've ever watched taking man meat is a daughter. Isn't that hot enough?
 
2012-05-03 05:55:19 PM  

Spartapuss: What's the point of searching this person out? Every woman you've ever watched taking man meat is a daughter. Isn't that hot enough?


No. Maybe some of us have reached a level of perversion that requires their father to be sitting there watching them get banged.

So an uncle/aunt biatching about it on a, probably fake, advice column is close enough.
 
2012-05-03 05:58:44 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


Why exactly do you have your next door neighbor bar friends' phone numbers?
 
2012-05-03 06:02:40 PM  

trappedspirit: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.

Why exactly do you have your next door neighbor bar friends' phone numbers?


In the olden days, neighbors actually used to know each other and be friends. I know it's weird. This is why people didn't like King of the Hill, because it depicted false truth that neighbors hang out and drink beer and actually talk to each other rather than nodding their heads at each other while driving into the garages and locking all the doors.
 
2012-05-03 06:16:55 PM  
Am I missing something? Where is the idea that this is a guy writing about his niece coming from?

I guess it is possible but "I checked the site and my heart sank" doesn't really sound like something a man would say. I also doubt a girl would confide that kind of info to her uncle, or want to sleep in the same room as him.
 
2012-05-03 06:17:18 PM  
I like the way the uncle didn't just take her word for it, and instead looked it up and WATCHED it.
 
2012-05-03 06:19:02 PM  

MycroftHolmes: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.

I love that site. This is one of my favorite performers.

NSFW


Pfaugh. Those are professionals. THIS (NSFW) is a TRUE armature.
 
2012-05-03 06:20:13 PM  

buckeyebrain: WienerButt: I know so many girls I grew up with who did/do porn. Backseat bangers, college rules, making their own sites...you name it. One girl charged 30 a month!!! She's a flight attendant now.

The best was the backseat banger girl. She did it while we were still in HS in 2003. At the time it didn't hit us, but the thought of a senior in HS right now getting 3P'd just kinda weirds me out.

I call Shenaningans unless you have some sort of visual evidence of this.


Link NSFW

Can't find the college rules video, only saw it once. There was another one on PornMD. And then two girls started their own site with some chick named Rachel Sexton but they're easy to google...

/Off the top of my head, or that I know of, 8 girls I went to high school with did porn
//5 did hardcore stuff
///the other 3 have their own little websites
 
2012-05-03 06:21:58 PM  
Dont tell her mom, but tell her we said "Thanks"
 
2012-05-03 06:23:14 PM  

jeffdo1: Am I missing something? Where is the idea that this is a guy writing about his niece coming from?

I guess it is possible but "I checked the site and my heart sank" doesn't really sound like something a man would say. I also doubt a girl would confide that kind of info to her uncle, or want to sleep in the same room as him.


I assumed that it was a woman because she was angry at her niece for the burden of knowing her secret.

only a woman gets mad about this kind of crap. I would never have even thought that such a burden existed. you either hear something and say to yourself, hmm, I need to do something to rectify this... or, you hear something and say to yourself, hmm, interesting... unfortunately, it doesn't appear that there is anything to be done, so I might as well forget about it.
 
2012-05-03 06:33:52 PM  

Strategeryz0r: 6ft 2in(AMAZON!!! 2/10 would not bang!!!)


Coward.
 
2012-05-03 06:35:48 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


Link or it didn't happen.
 
2012-05-03 06:52:39 PM  

yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.



I realize you're probably just trolling, but if you aren't: You're a repulsive creep.
 
2012-05-03 06:56:57 PM  
My ex getting the business. I dealt with he crazy. I get to post this video for all of ever. Only fair. http://www.xvideos.com/video1250701/seducing_charley_summers
 
2012-05-03 07:01:41 PM  

ZeroCorpse: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.

[www.gearseds.com image 500x355]

That must be some weird porn.


Violet wand? TENS unit?
 
2012-05-03 07:04:10 PM  

Fixxor: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.

Link or it didn't happen.


Isildur: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


I realize you're probably just trolling, but if you aren't: You're a repulsive creep.


wait it gets better

NSFW NSFW NSFW look at alexis folders other fun stuff there too I am not going to blackmail anyone. Knowing her father he has probably seen them. I went over to his house once to borrow some milk or something. His wife and kids were gone. As I walked by the front window I glanced in. Let me just say that no animals were hurt in the production of his pron. But they were present.
 
2012-05-03 07:06:27 PM  

Isildur: yert: I am getting a kick be cause my next door neighbor's daughter turned up on true armatures. you know the series with the fat, pale, blue eyed guy that shoots all the girls on the same old brown couch.

I can't decide if I should tell him or use it as blackmail to get some. she is pretty hot. either way it's been fun texting it to his friends at the bar.


I realize you're probably just trolling, but if you aren't: You're a repulsive creep.


oh and welcome to FARK
 
2012-05-03 07:12:33 PM  

I_Am_Weasel: That's never happened to me. No one has ever sent me pics of said items. Not one single female. I feel left out


Me either, even though my email address is my Fark user name plus [nospam-﹫-backwards]li­amg*co­m". It's very sad.
 
2012-05-03 07:25:45 PM  

haydenarrrrgh: I_Am_Weasel: That's never happened to me. No one has ever sent me pics of said items. Not one single female. I feel left out

Me either, even though my email address is my Fark user name plus "[[nospam-﹫-backwards] image 7x13]liamg[* image 7x13]com". It's very sad.


almost worse is the recent lack of any boobie threads to post in while I spend my night at work. it's almost as though a million kittens cried out at once and were suddenly silenced.

what happened, fark? what happened?
 
2012-05-03 07:36:41 PM  

lennavan: ABQGOD: And it's not like being in a porno makes you a whore or anything. They're called "actresses" for a reason: it's not even real sex. Real sex (for most of us) does not include multiple camera angles, multiple takes, lighting, directing , and clever edits.

Uh, by definition being in a porno makes you a whore. Unless I suppose you were volunteering?


By that definition, women who are supported by their husbands are also whores.

Right?
 
2012-05-03 07:42:09 PM  

Randomly: She was preyed upon and convinced that filming an internet porn film was a good idea?


Since when is answering a casting call being preyed upon?

I've worked around the edges of the adult content business and from what I have seen, there is no shortage of willing (if not eager) applicants for porn jobs. As long as you're paying cash money, you're going to get 5-10x as many applicants as you have roles to cast. There is such a glut of willing adult talent that pay rates are insanely low.
 
2012-05-03 07:43:03 PM  

clyph: Randomly: She was preyed upon and convinced that filming an internet porn film was a good idea?

Since when is answering a casting call being preyed upon?

I've worked around the edges of the adult content business and from what I have seen, there is no shortage of willing (if not eager) applicants for porn jobs. As long as you're paying cash money, you're going to get 5-10x as many applicants as you have roles to cast. There is such a glut of willing adult talent that pay rates are insanely low.


i have $10 and I'm looking for a party?
 
2012-05-03 07:44:25 PM  

knobmaker: By that definition, women who are supported by their husbands are also whores.

Right?


A whore takes your money, farks you, and leaves.

A wife takes your money, doesn't fark you, and stays.
 
2012-05-03 07:49:49 PM  

twiztedjustin: Who in the fark wants to see a 6 foot 2 tall girl having sex?


gallery.drfaulken.com
 
2012-05-03 07:55:54 PM  

Omahawg: i have $10 and I'm looking for a party?


Maybe not that low...

Used to be that the big players were paying $2000+ a scene; now they pay half that or less. Independent studios are even worse... 10 years ago they'd put up a casting call for $1000 per scene and get 1 or 2 applicants... now they can put up one for $500 per *DAY* (multiple scenes) and their phone will ring off the hook.
 
2012-05-03 08:00:09 PM  

clyph: Since when is answering a casting call being preyed upon?

I've worked around the edges of the adult content business and from what I have seen, there is no shortage of willing (if not eager) applicants for porn jobs. As long as you're paying cash money, you're going to get 5-10x as many applicants as you have roles to cast. There is such a glut of willing adult talent that pay rates are insanely low.



It is easy for women to find work in porn (good pay, too), but for straight males, you gotta do gay porn, fat chick porn, or granny porn first to "work up to" the hotties... And the straight male pornstar pay, in general, sucks (so a lot do gay for pay).
 
Displayed 50 of 286 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report