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(WLWT)   Man was a helmet at the time of the accident   (wlwt.com) divider line 97
    More: Sad, Tropical Cyclone Report, accidents  
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11531 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 May 2012 at 12:56 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-02 12:57:50 PM
unavailable for comment
www.themarysue.com
 
2012-05-02 12:58:21 PM
That explains the accident. Helmets can't drive.
 
2012-05-02 12:59:06 PM
"Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump out of that plane and that chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection. Later on the helmet's talking with the other helmets going "It's a good thing that he was there or I would have hit the ground directly."

-- Jerry Seinfeld
 
2012-05-02 12:59:40 PM

MBooda: unavailable for comment


I'd be more impressed if this happened in the Lone Star State.
 
2012-05-02 12:59:51 PM
Apparently he wasn't a good enough helmet.
 
2012-05-02 12:59:53 PM
t3.gstatic.com

t0.gstatic.com

???
 
2012-05-02 01:01:13 PM
They accidentally the whole article.
 
2012-05-02 01:01:56 PM
Did he go to plaid?
 
2012-05-02 01:02:18 PM
Helmets
Camden Chapter
Road Boss
 
2012-05-02 01:02:46 PM

The water was cold: "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump out of that plane and that chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection. Later on the helmet's talking with the other helmets going "It's a good thing that he was there or I would have hit the ground directly."

-- Jerry Seinfeld


i.imgur.com

Disagrees with your evaluation.
 
2012-05-02 01:03:08 PM
Moments before...

graphics8.nytimes.com
 
2012-05-02 01:03:46 PM

MBooda: unavailable for comment
[www.themarysue.com image 640x346]


More like:

gogreenmachine.org
 
2012-05-02 01:03:47 PM
So the guy on the bike was all farked up while the guy in the truck was uninjured? That's just weird. It's almost like all that steel somehow protected him.
 
2012-05-02 01:03:55 PM
images.uulyrics.com

What instrument did he play?

If someone was a member of the Steelers, they'd call him a Steeler, so what else would you call a guy in Helmet?
 
2012-05-02 01:05:17 PM

The water was cold: "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump out of that plane and that chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection. Later on the helmet's talking with the other helmets going "It's a good thing that he was there or I would have hit the ground directly."

-- Jerry Seinfeld


My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.

That's why you have a helmet. And that's why Jerry Seinfeld is one of the worst stand up comedians of all time(though his tv show was great.). Observational humor only works when you actually grasp all the concepts of what you're observing, yet still are able to find absurdities.
 
2012-05-02 01:05:46 PM
Epstein's Mother:

I never saw that show. It looks disturbing.
 
2012-05-02 01:06:15 PM
So this guy has the power to morph into inanimate objects?
 
2012-05-02 01:06:21 PM
In other news, 17-year-old drivers suck.
 
2012-05-02 01:07:13 PM
hizbut-tahrir.or.id

R.I.P. HELMUT SCHMIDT
 
2012-05-02 01:07:19 PM
Artists Rendering of the Article:

i.imgur.com

/using "artist" loosely
 
2012-05-02 01:07:20 PM

Uzzah: so what else would you call a guy in Helmet?


A clitoris.
 
2012-05-02 01:08:02 PM
Epstein's Mother

+50 intratoobs for the Lidsville pic
 
2012-05-02 01:08:29 PM
Purple helmet?
 
2012-05-02 01:08:59 PM

Uzzah: [images.uulyrics.com image 300x300]

What instrument did he play?

If someone was a member of the Steelers, they'd call him a Steeler, so what else would you call a guy in Helmet?


A Helmeteer?
 
2012-05-02 01:09:39 PM
I used to work for a guy like this... only he was of the 'throbbing, purple' variety...
 
2012-05-02 01:09:51 PM
If you get on a motorcycle, you are accepting the inevitable fact that you will be fatally injured. That's why I don't understand widows and children crying at biker's funerals. They didn't care about you people, so stop your blubbering!
 
2012-05-02 01:10:00 PM
Gee, we're being so hard on him.
 
2012-05-02 01:11:30 PM

The water was cold: "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it?


Yes.

Jerry Seinfeld

Is not now, nor has ever been, funny.

/and what's with airline peanuts?
 
2012-05-02 01:14:56 PM

Strategeryz0r:
My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.

That's why you have a helmet. And that's why Jerry Seinfeld is one of the worst stand up comedians of all time(though his tv show was great.). Observational humor only works when you actually grasp all the concepts of what you're observing, yet still are able to find absurdities.


1)So the helmet allowed you to sustain a concussion for a defined amount of time? I guess that's good.

2) You know how I know you've never seen Kathy Griffin's stand up?
 
2012-05-02 01:16:02 PM

Ambitwistor: Epstein's Mother:

I never saw that show. It looks disturbing.


It was. Sid and Marty Krofft did a number on my childhood.
 
2012-05-02 01:16:54 PM
"Herbst, who was a helmet at the time of the crash,"
See if he was a Christian this wouldn't of happened.
 
2012-05-02 01:19:33 PM

bpsmyth: Strategeryz0r:
My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.

That's why you have a helmet. And that's why Jerry Seinfeld is one of the worst stand up comedians of all time(though his tv show was great.). Observational humor only works when you actually grasp all the concepts of what you're observing, yet still are able to find absurdities.

1)So the helmet allowed you to sustain a concussion for a defined amount of time? I guess that's good.

2) You know how I know you've never seen Kathy Griffin's stand up?


ok indefinitely was the wrong word choice. Late night, I'm tired, sue me. But yes without the helmet my head would have been cracked open like a melon. With ease. Those things are no joke.

I have seen Kathy Griffin. Hence using the phrase ONE OF the worst ;)
 
2012-05-02 01:20:49 PM

Strategeryz0r: The water was cold: "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump out of that plane and that chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection. Later on the helmet's talking with the other helmets going "It's a good thing that he was there or I would have hit the ground directly."

-- Jerry Seinfeld

My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.

That's why you have a helmet. And that's why Jerry Seinfeld is one of the worst stand up comedians of all time(though his tv show was great.). Observational humor only works when you actually grasp all the concepts of what you're observing, yet still are able to find absurdities.


I dunno, I was lukewarm on Carlin for almost the opposite reason; everything he said was pretty much literally true, so I didn't really find him funny so much as stating the obvious, albeit in a humorous way. I suspect a lot of his fans were people who were not that overly critical to begin with, and so his audience enjoyed somebody pulling back the curtain for them. Somebody like Seinfeld is aware his jokes don't stand up to logistical scrutiny if taken literally; his stand up for me is enjoyable because it was just a play on situations, words. He was funny because of farking-course his jokes were massively reductive. In fact, I think it's rather hilarious that some people think somebody as intelligent as Seinfeld isn't aware that not being an expert in skydiving somehow makes that joke less funny. Lighten up Francis?
 
2012-05-02 01:21:11 PM
I'll bet he gave really good helmet.
 
2012-05-02 01:24:55 PM

Epstein's Mother: Moments before...

[graphics8.nytimes.com image 480x321]


*crawls under desk*
*rocks back and forth*
 
2012-05-02 01:25:18 PM
location of the accident

biker had the right of way, pickup entered from the road just ahead. another classic case of "inexperienced driver didn't look closely enough for oncoming traffic. Interesting that they gave the 17 year old's full name even though no charges have been filed.

/my new helmet is showing up tomorrow... now if it would only stop raining, i could start commuting on my 50mpg vehicle instead of in my 23mpg vehicle.
 
2012-05-02 01:28:47 PM

spentmiles: If you get on a motorcycle, you are accepting the inevitable fact that you will be fatally injured. That's why I don't understand widows and children crying at biker's funerals. They didn't care about you people, so stop your blubbering!


Whereas a persistent troll can expect a party at their funeral that will only be rivaled by the sendoff to Hell for Fred Phelps.
 
2012-05-02 01:30:29 PM
THEN WHO WAS PHONE?
 
2012-05-02 01:30:53 PM

Strategeryz0r: My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.


You might want to try 2 helmets next time.
 
2012-05-02 01:30:55 PM
Next time he might want to get even more obnoxiously louder pipes. The AW ones he had obviously didn't work.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:37 PM

Epstein's Mother: Moments before...

[graphics8.nytimes.com image 480x321]


Oh, thank you so freaking much. Now my childhood facial tic has returned.

Sid & Marty were responsible for so many of my night terrors.

However, they did have a kick-ass indoor amusement park.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:43 PM

bpsmyth: 2) You know how I know you've never seen Kathy Griffin's stand up?


It's hard to come up with a more appropriate debunking of Seinfield's status as the worst stand up comedians. But hell, I'm going to try anyway. Carrot Top? Gallagher? Andrew Dice Clay? I mean there are certainly more deserving candidates for that thankless title.
 
2012-05-02 01:37:48 PM

lockers: bpsmyth: 2) You know how I know you've never seen Kathy Griffin's stand up?

It's hard to come up with a more appropriate debunking of Seinfield's status as the worst stand up comedians. But hell, I'm going to try anyway. Carrot Top? Gallagher? Andrew Dice Clay? I mean there are certainly more deserving candidates for that thankless title.


I dare you to say that to Carrot Top's face. :P
 
2012-05-02 01:42:47 PM

lockers: bpsmyth: 2) You know how I know you've never seen Kathy Griffin's stand up?

It's hard to come up with a more appropriate debunking of Seinfield's status as the worst stand up comedians. But hell, I'm going to try anyway. Carrot Top? Gallagher? Andrew Dice Clay? I mean there are certainly more deserving candidates for that thankless title.


Lisa Lampanelli.
we get it, you're a fat whore who prefers black men. come up with another joke already.
 
2012-05-02 01:43:18 PM
Lidsville was definitely a terrifying show aimed at farking kids up.

Sid and Marty = Acid + Marijuana, I'm damned sure.
 
2012-05-02 01:46:56 PM
Meat helmet?
i46.tinypic.com
 
2012-05-02 01:52:57 PM

spentmiles: If you get on a motorcycle, you are accepting the inevitable fact that you will be fatally injured.


That's why I fly airplanes instead.
 
2012-05-02 01:54:48 PM

Crazy Talk Al: Epstein's Mother: Moments before...

[graphics8.nytimes.com image 480x321]

Oh, thank you so freaking much. Now my childhood facial tic has returned.

Sid & Marty were responsible for so many of my night terrors.

However, they did have a kick-ass indoor amusement park.


Which appropriately enough, became CNN headquarters.
 
2012-05-02 01:56:48 PM

Strategeryz0r: The water was cold: "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving: what is the point of the helmet in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump out of that plane and that chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection. Later on the helmet's talking with the other helmets going "It's a good thing that he was there or I would have hit the ground directly."

-- Jerry Seinfeld

My parachute deployed, I hit my head on a rock once I landed on the ground. Without the helmet it would have indefinitely caused a concussion.

That's why you have a helmet. And that's why Jerry Seinfeld is one of the worst stand up comedians of all time(though his tv show was great.). Observational humor only works when you actually grasp all the concepts of what you're observing, yet still are able to find absurdities.


See also: Whacking your melon on the horizontal stabilizer of the aircraft you just exited. (rare - but happens occasionally)
 
2012-05-02 01:56:54 PM
images.starpulse.com

Guess it was "Put on the damn helmet" day
 
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