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(Daily Mail)   Ever wanted to get into bed with identical twins? Well this guy married them (and their cousin). Polygamy rocks   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Interesting, stay-at-home mother  
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40468 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 May 2012 at 1:15 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-02 01:28:11 PM  

theotherwhitemeat: I have a husband and a wife (obviously not legally) and it has nothing to to with religion.

FYI: three to a bed = lousy nights sleep! We rotate as well.


www.web-nine.com
 
2012-05-02 01:28:43 PM  
I was gonna say if you're worried about the welfare of the cousin, you could probably float her some loans or stuff, you don't need to marry her.

But then again, if you're going to give her money and she's down for it, you might as well be banging her.
 
2012-05-02 01:28:55 PM  
/married to an identical twin
//still 1 for 2 on tapping them :(
 
2012-05-02 01:28:57 PM  

"Day-yam. I reckon I'd need more than a million bucks to do two twins at the same time."

livingwithballs.com

 
2012-05-02 01:29:00 PM  
This is what the world would look like if left to natural law. A few rich guys at the top would have everything. Monogamy laws actually protect the interests of the majority of men. Without them, there would be incredible levels of violence, as the majority of men would have no access to women and therefore nothing better to do than spend all day eating and lifting weights and murdering the competition.
 
2012-05-02 01:29:29 PM  
How can mormons ruin pologamy? I swear if I can ever have a harem one day it will be fun and the woman all mute so I would have to listen to them cluck. Dare I dream.
 
2012-05-02 01:29:32 PM  

sfpfc: Timing is everything, menstruation is the key word, avoid it and he is onto a winner.


They will have all likely synched up due to the McClintock Effect. So while he's home free for most of the month, for a few days he gets a Voltron of irrational weeping and Bibles thrown at his head.
 
2012-05-02 01:29:38 PM  
Wow that rare case of the guy not aging as well as the women. MILFS for sure, even after all those kids.

/you bet your ass he's had f'd up sister 3 ways.
 
2012-05-02 01:29:45 PM  
Jebus...poor kid to the right has a major 5-head.

i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2012-05-02 01:29:48 PM  

H31N0US: 24/3 = 6. Each wife pushed out 6 kids on average.

I have no problem with polygamy per se but trying to populate the planet with your DNA is so last millennium.


electrictheatre.tv
 
2012-05-02 01:29:56 PM  

i.dailymail.co.uk

i.dailymail.co.uk

LIKE A BOSS.

 
2012-05-02 01:30:03 PM  

fawlty: H31N0US: 24/3 = 6. Each wife pushed out 6 kids on average.

I have no problem with polygamy per se but trying to populate the planet with your DNA is so last millennium.

Nicely done. 10/10.


Nope...I really just spaced on that. Was more focused on the Genghis Khan reference.
 
2012-05-02 01:30:11 PM  

Joafu: [images.fandango.com image 197x295]

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x780]


I was thinking the same thing
 
2012-05-02 01:30:22 PM  

The sound of one hand clapping: TFA says that he rotates which one of the 3 wives he sleeps with each night. What's the point of having the twin fantasy if you don't sleep with them together. I've never really been much into the twin fantasy myself but I always thought that the whole idea was having both twins at the same time.

/Realize that the guy probably didn't just do it for the twin fantasy
//Still thinks he oughta be coaching them into sharing a bed


Hey, if he's going to do that, might as well throw the cousin in for a foursome.
 
2012-05-02 01:30:30 PM  
Polygamyamory rocks

Fixed that for you, subby. Why the fark would anyone want multiple spouses?
 
2012-05-02 01:30:50 PM  
img.photobucket.com

Approves...
 
2012-05-02 01:31:02 PM  
DAAAAYUMMM!.
 
2012-05-02 01:31:11 PM  
 
2012-05-02 01:31:20 PM  

Sun Worshiping Dog Launcher: dkrel: Why in the hell would you want more than one wife? I only need one to tell me I need to take out the garbage or that I don't do enough around the house.

It is all I can do to handle one round of PMS. But two? Three? No thanks. You're left with two problems there. Either their cycles fail to sync up and you could actually be looking at several weeks of PMSing every month, or they do sync and you have triple the hell all in one week. Either way, no thank you.


Look fundamentalists figured this one out centuries ago. When the women folk become unclean you send them to stay in the sanctuary until they stop being unclean.
 
2012-05-02 01:31:26 PM  

Tommy Moo: This is what the world would look like if left to natural law. A few rich guys at the top would have everything. Monogamy laws actually protect the interests of the majority of men. Without them, there would be incredible levels of violence, as the majority of men would have no access to women and therefore nothing better to do than spend all day eating and lifting weights and murdering the competition.


That's why we need to legalize prostitution.

/how often the simple solution is ignored
 
2012-05-02 01:31:28 PM  

the_end_is_rear: Strategeryz0r: the_end_is_rear: Strategeryz0r: *grabs popcorn*

This thread could go to glorious places .Please don't disappoint me fark. Or make me waste my baconpop on this thread.

hahahahahahaha

Just about spit up my coffee.
"baconpop".......that is funny

[www.thinkgeek.com image 400x363]

Can't tell if sarcastic or serious. But it's real, and it's delicious.

I was serious. I did not know that stuff existed.
I learn something every day on Fark.


In that case, glad to be of service my good man! I suggest trying Baconpop, it's farking delicious.
 
2012-05-02 01:32:09 PM  
Why do all these women who are into polygamy also have a lot of kids? You'd almost start to think that they have no personal autonomy or freedom to use birth control.

But that can't be. This is the 21st century.
 
2012-05-02 01:32:33 PM  

joyride75: Oh, so I can hear three times the nagging? No thanks.


THIS!

Anyone who has more than one spouse is not only a polygamist but a masochist as well.
 
2012-05-02 01:32:53 PM  
I don't have a problem with whatever legal/sexual/cohabitational arrangements willing adults want to construct.
It's just the way mormons tend to do it that squicks me out. (the religious justifications, arranged marriages, young brides, tribes of children, etc)
 
2012-05-02 01:32:57 PM  
homeboy ain't nothing to look at, so we can only assume ....
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-05-02 01:33:04 PM  
Not surprised he's running a construction company. A lot of the FLDS in southern Utah work construction for the same company. It's pretty much church held, and they always underbid everyone on contracts.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:19 PM  
They are at least decently not sharp kneed and age appropiate for me.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:19 PM  

Strategeryz0r: John Napkintosh: Why is polygamy illegal again?

Because dashing, good looking, well off men would inevitably have 30+ insanely hot wives.

Leaving the rest of us with the fatties.


also, it complicates legal relationships. marriage already makes stuff complicated between two people... but, how should polygamy work? with community property, is half the husband's and half split between the wives (I think this is not fair, but if you're talking about polygamy, you're probably not talking to a group of people who have women's rights on the forefront of their mind). is it split equally? who inherits whose shares? etc. furthermore, co-ownership is generally frowned upon since it locks property away from commerce...

but, the biggest reason, those in power think it's gross. personally, i think polygamy will be the next big civil rights issue after gay marriage is allowed. (give it 20-40 years).

/ I think polygamy is dumb and borderline immoral... but I don't care if it were legal. as long as you could make sure that those involved are consenting to the relationship.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:45 PM  

John Napkintosh: Why is polygamy illegal again?


It upsets the christians.
 
2012-05-02 01:33:50 PM  
and not a single attractive adult, or cute kid in the bunch....

/they're doing it wrong.
 
2012-05-02 01:34:09 PM  

content7.flixster.com
"So, the half-siblings are their own cousins, and... somehow they will end up being their own Grandpa, amiright?"

 
2012-05-02 01:34:12 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk

It looks like Big Love here is doing bigamy right.

Odd that SLC doesn't go after him since their church supposedly doesn't allow it anymore.
 
2012-05-02 01:35:20 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk

There are at least two serial killers in this picture, can you spot them?
 
2012-05-02 01:35:22 PM  

maverickzy: Trackball: H31N0US: 24/3 = 6. Each wife pushed out 6 kids on average.

I have no problem with polygamy per se but trying to populate the planet with your DNA is so last millennium.

Sorry, the answer we were looking for is 8. 8 kids on average. Not 6.

Stop oppressing us! Our Lord the Mathemal has taught us that 24/3 = 6. The holy scripture is infallible and our beliefs are strong.


Our Prophet Imbecilius, may his name be blessed forever, taught us that division of any number is a sin punishable by death.
 
2012-05-02 01:36:01 PM  

joyride75: Oh, so I can hear three times the nagging? No thanks.


I think a clever polygamist can have the wives nag at each other instead of at him. A monogamist, even a clever one, doesn't have anybody to deflect the nagging to.
 
2012-05-02 01:36:38 PM  
A large number of births in those little FLDS towns are born with defects that cause the children to basically be put in basket for the rest of their lives and cared for 24/7. Lots of health insurance fraud as they get the state to pay for all of their inbred offspring. I think only three or four founding families started the gene pool back in the 1800s and it hasn't changed.
 
2012-05-02 01:37:03 PM  

Jubeebee: That guy has the same smug smile in every picture in TFA.


You would too if you could fark three different rather attractive women while having them know about it and not give a shiat. It would be an awkward four-some though..
 
2012-05-02 01:37:08 PM  
This arrangement seems prohibitively expensive. Three mortgages and 24 kids? Yikes.
 
2012-05-02 01:37:18 PM  

Mock26: John Napkintosh: Why is polygamy illegal again?

It upsets the christians.


That and it's basically a public health hazard. If it were more common our gene pool would get pretty bad...
 
2012-05-02 01:37:23 PM  
Not "Romney's" world. Different church. If you married more than one person in the LDS church, you get excommunicated. "mormon" wedding in your home? Sorry. "mormon" wedding is in the temple. Not allowed in if you aren't a member of the LDS church. The bishop can do a civil union, but if the guy was married in Utah, or any of the other 50 states, marrying more than one wife is also illegal. If the guy is a member of some off shoot, whatever, but it isn't the same church. Polygamy hasn't been allowed in the LDS church for over 100 years. This is as officially "mormon" as marrying a goat.

//welcome to the stereotype and ignorance
//do you feel the bliss?
 
2012-05-02 01:38:37 PM  

H31N0US: 24/3 = 6. Each wife pushed out 6 kids on average.

I have no problem with polygamy per se but trying to populate the planet with your DNA is so last millennium.


I have no problem with polygamy either but I have a problem with people failing at kindergarten math.
 
2012-05-02 01:38:42 PM  

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x776]

It looks like Big Love here is doing bigamy right.

Odd that SLC doesn't go after him since their church supposedly doesn't allow it anymore.


More than likely one of those splinter sects that are not directly tied to the church.
 
2012-05-02 01:38:56 PM  

qorkfiend: This arrangement seems prohibitively expensive. Three mortgages and 24 kids? Yikes.


This. How do they possibly live?

I would like to occasionally get with identical twins. But they'd have to be around 22-24 years old and I would not want to end up saddled with dozens of farking children afterwards.
 
2012-05-02 01:39:00 PM  

wraithmare: A large number of births in those little FLDS towns are born with defects that cause the children to basically be put in basket for the rest of their lives and cared for 24/7. Lots of health insurance fraud as they get the state to pay for all of their inbred offspring. I think only three or four founding families started the gene pool back in the 1800s and it hasn't changed.


don't forget, only one of the ladies is his legal wife, so all the others are single women with children (and probably no job), cashing in on that welfare check.
 
2012-05-02 01:39:03 PM  

John Napkintosh: ...the majority of men would have no access to women and therefore nothing better to do than spend all day eating and lifting weights and murdering the competition.

Or bettering themselves in order to better compete with the men who are getting all the women.


Hahahahahaha you are so naive. Just look at fark how many comments tear him down instead of building themselves up? Plus the rich have made the rules so the poor can't succeed anymore.
 
2012-05-02 01:39:35 PM  
i282.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-02 01:40:02 PM  

mitchcumstein1: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x403]

There are at least two serial killers in this picture, can you spot them?


Everyone in that back row has potential.
 
2012-05-02 01:40:25 PM  

Rann Xerox: joyride75: Oh, so I can hear three times the nagging? No thanks.

THIS!

Anyone who has more than one spouse is not only a polygamist but a masochist as well.


Nah, you just delegate that to the first wife.

Hm. Who the fark is the first wife if you marry twins at the same time?
 
2012-05-02 01:40:52 PM  
The October Surprise is going to be the unveiling of Romney's additional wives.
 
2012-05-02 01:40:54 PM  
"All around the world I find that only stupid people are breeding"
 
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