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(Guardian)   This might shock you, but all those documents seized in the Osama bin Laden assassination show that OBL had close ties to al Qaeda and the Taliban. I know. Almost fell off my chair, too   (guardian.co.uk) divider line 27
    More: Obvious, al-Qaeda, Taliban, Osama bin Laden, assassinations  
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7743 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Apr 2012 at 12:58 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-30 01:08:31 PM  
8 votes:
I met Osama while attending King Abdulaziz University. We were on the water polo team together. The pool maintenance team hated him because he was hairy as a bear and shed like a sheepdog in heat. He was always clogging up the filters. It was gross playing with him because I was always picking his pubic hairs out of my mouth. He wore his speedos two sizes too small, and it looked like he was smuggling Bob Ross in the crotch.

Osama came from a very wealthy family too, so he'd often break the rules without consequences. Whenever he got the ball, he would get out of the pool with it, run over to the opposing side's goal and throw it in from behind the net. Typical spoiled brat behavior. When one team's coach complained, they found his head floating in the pool the next day. It wasn't fun to play with him, but there was no alternative.

He also liked to fart in the hot tub after practice. He would catch the bubbles in his mouth as they floated up. With a heavy diet of bean curd, hummus, and goat hoof, he had some serious gastrointestinal power. I'm glad he's dead so I don't have to smell his farts in the hot team van anymore. Fitting that he was buried at sea.
2012-04-30 11:02:08 AM  
4 votes:
Whar Deth Certificat? Whar?
2012-04-30 01:08:49 PM  
3 votes:
I remember my last 20 month erection. Seems like August 2010 was just yesterday.
2012-04-30 01:01:45 PM  
2 votes:

colinspooky: Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of


youthvoices.net

Yeah. We know.
2012-04-30 10:36:32 AM  
2 votes:

Diogenes: colinspooky: Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of

Oh, that would be a beautiful thing.

In the teabaggers' fervor to deny Obama's accomplishments they go so far as to claim it was all a setup. bin Laden was an innocent businessman set up as a patsy.


Baggers becoming Truthers would be the single most significant advancement in Derpistry since the protest of the government takeover of Medicare.
2012-04-30 09:56:25 AM  
2 votes:

colinspooky: Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of


Oh, that would be a beautiful thing.

In the teabaggers' fervor to deny Obama's accomplishments they go so far as to claim it was all a setup. bin Laden was an innocent businessman set up as a patsy.
2012-05-02 12:21:07 AM  
1 votes:
Wait, so fabricated group name made up by Mossad creates made up documents too? so, does this prove that OBL is like, not real either? and how did they get DNA on him hours later? Doesn't DNA take like, weeks or something? Oh- forgot most of you guys believe everything you read/hear.
2012-04-30 04:36:09 PM  
1 votes:

mc6809e: treesloth: I heard that Hitler was a Nazi.

That's just a rumor started by conservatives to discredit national socialism.


Say what you will about the tenets of national socialism, but at least it's an ethos.
2012-04-30 03:39:50 PM  
1 votes:
Didn't they find the Al Qaeda work order with his signature under "authorized by" in the debris of the twin towers?
2012-04-30 02:47:51 PM  
1 votes:
Oh, yeah, Bin Laden (Tim Osman). We didn't want to look suspicious so we burned him up and dumped him in the ocean. No need to piss off the Muslims by parading his corpse. They're still getting over the whole dog attacks, corpse abuse, torture and rape at Abu Ghraib.

I think they should have questioned him about his role in the OKC bombing.
2012-04-30 02:42:32 PM  
1 votes:

treesloth: I heard that Hitler was a Nazi.


come on dude, don't call people nazis, it just dilutes your point.
2012-04-30 02:22:54 PM  
1 votes:
img.photobucket.com
2012-04-30 02:02:03 PM  
1 votes:

illegal.tender: Express skepticism towards the official explanation?

"LOL herr durp you're such a tard."

The government lies all the time. It would surprise me exactly zero were it to come out that, for example, Osama bin Laden was a complete fabrication, start to finish.

I know, I know. "Herr durp, streetlights, troofer", and etc.

fark it. Governments lie to gain and maintain power. The most common way they do so is by propping up/creating various Emmanuel Goldsteins for the population to fear and hate. OBL fit both perfectly.

It baffles me why so many on Fark seem to think that expressing skepticism is ok when it comes to religion, but utterly and completely ridiculous when applied to government.


LOL herr durp you're such a tard.

No really you are. The biggest failing of conspiracy theories is that they assume that the US government is capable of enacting detailed plans involving many many people without us finding out when in fact a US ambassador cannot even make rude comments about Canada without wikileaks finding out. If the US brought down the WTC and OBL was a fabrication I think they might have found a way to smuggle some WMDs into Iraq so they could 'find' them.

The government doesn't know how the internet works, cannot balance a budget, and is running your country into the ground faster than an asteroid, and yet some people choose to believe that somehow they have the ability to outsmart all of us except for the conspiracy theorists. Which brings me to my second point. Have you ever meet a 'real' conspiracy theorist? They really aren't smarter than the 'sheeple' most of them are outright stupid. All these theories are is how the guy who bags your groceries or pumps your gas comes to terms with his station in life, he constructs a mental image of himself as smarter than everyone else which helps him cope with the inadequacies of his life.
2012-04-30 01:50:56 PM  
1 votes:
Where are all of the documents linking Bin Laden and 9/11 to Iraq and Saddam Hussein? I was assured, by multiple emails forwarded to me by relatives, that Iraq had something to do with 9/11, Al Qdoba and Bin Laden.
2012-04-30 01:37:30 PM  
1 votes:
stkarnick.com

I'm shocked! Shocked!
2012-04-30 01:31:47 PM  
1 votes:

illegal.tender: It baffles me why so many on Fark seem to think that expressing skepticism is ok when it comes to religion, but utterly and completely ridiculous when applied to government.


You are correct. Government, just like religion, inherently, invariably, and directly invokes supernatural events and a complete suspension of the known physical properties of the universe. The two subjects are thus directly comparable.
2012-04-30 01:30:04 PM  
1 votes:
static.guim.co.uk
"You don't say!?"
2012-04-30 01:28:17 PM  
1 votes:
I don't believe it. Everyone knows that such a good friend of the Bush family would not associate with al Qaeda, the Taliban or Methodists!
2012-04-30 01:17:45 PM  
1 votes:

dittybopper: TheShavingofOccam123: I remember my last 20 month erection. Seems like August 2010 was just yesterday.

Oddly enough, this fits.


That's what...ah, forget it.

Jeez did I ever post in the wrong thread.
2012-04-30 01:10:17 PM  
1 votes:

TheShavingofOccam123: I remember my last 20 month erection. Seems like August 2010 was just yesterday.


Oddly enough, this fits.
2012-04-30 01:08:04 PM  
1 votes:
I was more surprised about his close ties to Publishers Clearing House and his controlling interests in TV Guide and CatFancy.
2012-04-30 01:07:35 PM  
1 votes:

GAT_00: Diogenes: colinspooky: Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of

Oh, that would be a beautiful thing.

In the teabaggers' fervor to deny Obama's accomplishments they go so far as to claim it was all a setup. bin Laden was an innocent businessman set up as a patsy.

They might try that if things start looking grim for Romney.


GIS for grim romneydalje.com
grim romney is a great band name
2012-04-30 12:18:45 PM  
1 votes:

cretinbob: colinspooky: Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of

Dude, I think that tin foil is stuck to your head.


Dude, I think your satire detection needle is jammed on serious
2012-04-30 11:50:44 AM  
1 votes:
FTFA: Documents found in the house where Osama bin Laden was killed a year ago show a close working relationship between top al-Qaida leaders and Mullah Omar, the overall commander of the Taliban, including frequent discussions of joint operations against Nato forces in Afghanistan, the Afghan government and targets in Pakistan.

i3.photobucket.comi3.photobucket.comi3.photobucket.comi3.photobucket.comi3.photobucket.com

Some clever reporting by Mr. Romero with help from military analyst N.S. Sherlock
2012-04-30 11:23:49 AM  
1 votes:

SnarfVader: Whar Deth Certificat? Whar?


And we want to see the long-form Death Certificate, not some chincy Certification of Dead Death.
2012-04-30 10:38:37 AM  
1 votes:
And Iraq. Don't forget how he gave all those WMDs to Iraq.
2012-04-30 09:54:00 AM  
1 votes:
Amazing what fake docs can convince some people of
 
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