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(Hartford Courant)   Prison officials propose law to label masturbating inmates as sex offenders, opponents say either way it would be tossed   (courant.com) divider line 182
    More: Stupid, prison officials, sex offenders, AFSCME  
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7183 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Apr 2012 at 8:18 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-27 05:42:28 PM  
I guess prison officials and state leaders are tired of paying for eyeglasses, laser treatments to remove green hair on hands.
 
2012-04-27 05:52:31 PM  
This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.
 
2012-04-27 05:56:33 PM  
I wonder how this will be enforced.



Now I'm wondering if they need new staff and are taking applications. "Here, let me take care of that for you."
 
2012-04-27 05:57:39 PM  

slayer199: This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.


Not to mention, it will add more time onto their sentences, meaning the corporations running the prisons can earn more profit. Plus, if they're on the sex offender registry now, they'll never make it outside of prison in the real world, and they'll soon be back in prison, where the corporations that run the prisons can make a profit off of them!

It's a win for all the corporations involved!
 
2012-04-27 06:26:56 PM  
Have we so completely demonized people in prison that they are essentially slaves without any rights, yet?
 
2012-04-27 06:30:31 PM  
That should beat the problem
 
2012-04-27 06:55:44 PM  
www.movieprop.com

This is an unauthorized thought process.
 
2012-04-27 06:58:45 PM  
There is a difference between jerking it in a sock underneath a blanket when no one is watching and jerking it out in the open when female guards are around
 
2012-04-27 06:59:04 PM  
Guess now they'll want to spend more time working on their hands-free orgasm technique...

/ Tantra FTW!
 
2012-04-27 07:03:45 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: That should beat the problem


It's certainly stiff punishment.
 
2012-04-27 07:03:48 PM  
What the holy f*ck? Seriously? "I jerked it while locked up in a place where the only possible sex was rape, and now I wear an ankle bracelet, have to live in the worst part of town and have no hope whatsoever of obtaining gainful employment again." Great plan, guys.
 
2012-04-27 07:17:59 PM  
Why don't they make like Lizzie Borden and give them 40 whacks?

www.horsetrackhooligans.com
Just wait til Miggs hears about this.
 
2012-04-27 07:22:29 PM  

Cagey B: What the holy f*ck? Seriously? "I jerked it while locked up in a place where the only possible sex was rape, and now I wear an ankle bracelet, have to live in the worst part of town and have no hope whatsoever of obtaining gainful employment again." Great plan, guys.


I didn't see your quotation marks at first and went WTF?
 
2012-04-27 07:30:28 PM  

slayer199: This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.


alternatively, if we label them sex offenders then we virtually ensure that their lives are forever ruined. they'll be stuck in the system forever, and will help keep prison population levels up high.
 
2012-04-27 08:22:06 PM  

Weaver95: slayer199: This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.

alternatively, if we label them sex offenders then we virtually ensure that their lives are forever ruined. they'll be stuck in the system forever, and will help keep prison population levels up high.


Remember, Corrections Corporation execs have to eat too.
 
2012-04-27 08:22:45 PM  
I'm sure that the private prison industry is 100% behind this law as it would further the keeping of people in the prison system.
 
2012-04-27 08:24:03 PM  
Prisoners should have the inalienable right to masturbate. They should probably be provided special rooms they can go to take care of business in privacy.

They are still human.
 
2012-04-27 08:25:10 PM  

Weaver95: slayer199: This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.

alternatively, if we label them sex offenders then we virtually ensure that their lives are forever ruined. they'll be stuck in the system forever, and will help keep prison population levels up high.


This is why the concept of for-profit prisons is absolutely immoral. Prison should be a bad thing for all involved, so it is an incentive to improve society. If anyone in power benefits from filling prisons it's an incentive to make society worse.
 
2012-04-27 08:25:21 PM  

cman: There is a difference between jerking it in a sock underneath a blanket when no one is watching and jerking it out in the open when female guards are around


You're right there is a difference, I wonder if that subtlety would actually be recognized within this new law...
It was lost on subby...
 
2012-04-27 08:25:46 PM  
meanwhile the Sisters are still free to get rapey, as well as the guards who decide to teach an inmate a lesson with their baton.
 
2012-04-27 08:25:54 PM  
What if they're jerking each other off? These inmates will find loop holes.
 
2012-04-27 08:26:30 PM  
I see nobody read the article.

Department officials say it's an ongoing problem at prisons such as the high security Northern Correctional Institution in Somers, where some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers.

This isn't for the guy that is just minding his own business and beating off in his cell. This is for the guys that intentionally beat off in front of guards and other employees to intimidate them.
 
2012-04-27 08:28:08 PM  
From the article:

"... some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers."

"The bill would only apply to inmates who are deemed to be targeting staff with their activity, and would not be used when someone inadvertently walks in on an inmate in a private moment, Garnett said."

Sometimes it helps to read the article before freaking out.
 
2012-04-27 08:28:14 PM  
If you don't get shocked by what they do they'll stop doing it. The power they get from doing this is only the power the guards give them.
 
2012-04-27 08:28:50 PM  
Masturbating in jail illegal; raping fellow inmates still ok
 
2012-04-27 08:29:04 PM  
In reality, they probably should be handing out porn and lube. Now that I think about it, they should let them smoke all the pot in the world. Could you image how relaxed the prisoner would be? The only reason they would riot would be from a raging case of the munchies.
 
2012-04-27 08:29:11 PM  

ongbok: I see nobody read the article.

Department officials say it's an ongoing problem at prisons such as the high security Northern Correctional Institution in Somers, where some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers.

This isn't for the guy that is just minding his own business and beating off in his cell. This is for the guys that intentionally beat off in front of guards and other employees to intimidate them.


sno man: cman: There is a difference between jerking it in a sock underneath a blanket when no one is watching and jerking it out in the open when female guards are around

You're right there is a difference, I wonder if that subtlety would actually be recognized within this new law...
It was lost on subby...

 
2012-04-27 08:29:42 PM  

Ed Grubermann: If you don't get shocked by what they do they'll stop doing it. The power they get from doing this is only the power the guards give them.


This, btw, is the way to handle trolls. Giving them an audience is perpetuating the problem.
 
2012-04-27 08:30:14 PM  
Lock up men for years or maybe even the rest of their lives, and the pinheads of authority demand that the convicts not even spank it?

I sure hope they like having prison riots every Tuesday.
 
2012-04-27 08:32:10 PM  

Ed Grubermann: If you don't get shocked by what they do they'll stop doing it. The power they get from doing this is only the power the guards give them.


Alternately, the guards and/or staff could punch them in the exposed cawk.

Problem solved.
 
2012-04-27 08:32:13 PM  
I'm sure this is to help keep the prison levels at 90%, so they can keep saving states money.
 
2012-04-27 08:32:55 PM  
I'd have gotten 10 years tacked on.

just today
 
2012-04-27 08:33:07 PM  

krafty420: Masturbating in jail illegal; raping fellow inmates still ok


Look, Ma, an idiot.
 
2012-04-27 08:33:36 PM  
Let em 'bate. Hell, issue every new inmate with a fleshlight. They won't have to open the cell again until their release date.

/release
 
2012-04-27 08:33:59 PM  

KiplingKat872: Ed Grubermann: If you don't get shocked by what they do they'll stop doing it. The power they get from doing this is only the power the guards give them.

Alternately, the guards and/or staff could punch them in the exposed cawk.

Problem solved.


A hose connected to a cold water spigot would also do the trick.
 
2012-04-27 08:34:10 PM  
Isn't masturbating in front of anyone (female prison guards included) already a sex offense? Why is a new law needed?
 
2012-04-27 08:34:49 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Prisoners should have the inalienable right to masturbate. They should probably be provided special rooms they can go to take care of business in privacy.


Like a Wackenhut?
 
2012-04-27 08:35:10 PM  
FTFA.....

....."the department is removing all pornography, material that contains "pictorial depictions of sexual activity or nudity," from the prisons. Inmates were given a year to get rid of all their porn and the total ban takes effect in July.

The ban is intended to improve the work environment for prison staffers who might be inadvertently exposed to the material."

Right. Because working around convicted drug dealers, rapists, killers, thieves, and all other manner of criminals is a HAPPY work environment, and PORN makes it a bad place to work.

If you choose to work in that environment, don't be surprised when some jackass whips out his weener and has a stroke or two.
 
2012-04-27 08:35:41 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: slayer199: This is a great idea. Let's make the inmates as frustrated as possible. I'm sure that will work out well.

Not to mention, it will add more time onto their sentences, meaning the corporations running the prisons can earn more profit. Plus, if they're on the sex offender registry now, they'll never make it outside of prison in the real world, and they'll soon be back in prison, where the corporations that run the prisons can make a profit off of them!

It's a win for all the corporations involved!


Why do you hate corporate America?

So, they're locked up with other frustrated people, can't smoke, have coffee or a civilized cocktail and they can't beat off?
Yes warden ma'am, this IS about power; as in your need to completely demoralize and destroy another human.
 
2012-04-27 08:35:42 PM  

Ed Grubermann: krafty420: Masturbating in jail illegal; raping fellow inmates still ok

Look, Ma, an idiot.


There are a lot of idiots in here who are commenting without even reading the article, or don't have the comprehension to understand the article.
 
2012-04-27 08:35:47 PM  

ongbok: I see nobody read the article.

Department officials say it's an ongoing problem at prisons such as the high security Northern Correctional Institution in Somers, where some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers.

This isn't for the guy that is just minding his own business and beating off in his cell. This is for the guys that intentionally beat off in front of guards and other employees to intimidate them.


Intimidated by masturbation? Perhaps a career in a correctional facility is not for you.
 
2012-04-27 08:37:04 PM  
Isn't masturbating in public already a crime? It seems rubbing one out in front of a guard, etc. who isn't interested in watching should already be illegal. If not then I think I may change my evening plans.
 
HBK
2012-04-27 08:37:43 PM  

mhuckins: From the article:

"... some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers."

"The bill would only apply to inmates who are deemed to be targeting staff with their activity, and would not be used when someone inadvertently walks in on an inmate in a private moment, Garnett said."

Sometimes it helps to read the article before freaking out.


If those female guards and counselors have thin skin, maybe they shouldn't be working at a prison. I don't know why we have to keep changing the rules to let women work in certain professions.
 
2012-04-27 08:38:00 PM  

JNowe: ongbok: I see nobody read the article.

Department officials say it's an ongoing problem at prisons such as the high security Northern Correctional Institution in Somers, where some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers.

This isn't for the guy that is just minding his own business and beating off in his cell. This is for the guys that intentionally beat off in front of guards and other employees to intimidate them.

Intimidated by masturbation? Perhaps a career in a correctional facility is not for you.


So you wouldn't mind if somebody pulled out their cock in front of you and started beating off?
 
2012-04-27 08:38:33 PM  

JNowe: ongbok: I see nobody read the article.

Department officials say it's an ongoing problem at prisons such as the high security Northern Correctional Institution in Somers, where some inmates purposefully masturbate in front of staff, often female guards, counselors or other prison workers.

This isn't for the guy that is just minding his own business and beating off in his cell. This is for the guys that intentionally beat off in front of guards and other employees to intimidate them.

Intimidated by masturbation? Perhaps a career in a correctional facility is not for you.


The best way to handle it is if you see an inmate masturbating to intimidate you, whip your dick out and start beating it in front if him.

If nothing else, you've turned an awkward moment into a fun one.

/and if female inmates masturbate in front of the guards, get a video camera and call Cinemax.
 
2012-04-27 08:40:54 PM  
i706.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-27 08:41:12 PM  
I think ignoring is the way to go. And if you can't ignore them, turn your back and snicker with another prison employee, making sure the inmate sees you gesturing with your thumb and forefinger about two inches apart.
 
2012-04-27 08:42:08 PM  
"She said the problem involves a relatively small group of inmates".
Now they're judging too ?
 
2012-04-27 08:42:16 PM  
RTFA, nothing to see here, move along now
 
2012-04-27 08:42:28 PM  
Sigh. I guess I have to weigh in here.

In Florida it's called "gunning," where an inmate intentionally masturbates in front of an officer or other staff member. Nobody cares if you do it in your cell under a blanket, where it can't be seen; that's pretty much expected.

Gunning, OTOH, is a pretty sick and common practice, and it's understandable that they'd want to increase the penalty for it. I won't weigh in on whether placement on the sex offender registry is proper, because those registries are so flawed to begin with.

Here, as of now at least, they can put an inmate who's a gunner on the loaf for doing it: 33-602.223, Florida Administrative Code:

"(3) Inmates in any confinement status may be placed on the special management meal for creating a security problem by any of the following acts:
(a) The throwing or misuse of food, beverage, food utensils, food tray, or human waste products;
(b) Spitting at staff;
(c) The destruction of food trays or utensils;
(d) Any other acts that would place staff in jeopardy if a serving tray or utensils were provided.
(4) Inmates on close or maximum management status may be placed on the special management meal as a result of intentional, unauthorized exposure of genitalia to staff.
 
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