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(WFTV Orlando)   Welcome to Walmart. May I help you steal some televisions?   (wftv.com) divider line 73
    More: Amusing, Wal-Mart, videos, Zephyrhills, Walmart greeter, google, Google Adsense, greetings, pay per clicks  
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11830 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Apr 2012 at 3:27 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-26 11:47:56 AM
34-year-old Frederick Leon Gallimore

There are Wal-Mart greeters under the age of 70?
 
2012-04-26 12:05:16 PM
Back when I shopped at Wal-Mart, if the alarm would go off as I was leaving, the greeter would simply ask "Do you have a DVD?"

"Yes", I would answer.

"Oh, then go ahead." The greeter always said.

I figured that if I wanted to shoplift from Wal-Mart, I would only need to buy a DVD with the items that I am stealing.
 
2012-04-26 01:48:42 PM

Sybarite: 34-year-old Frederick Leon Gallimore

There are Wal-Mart greeters under the age of 70?


And we're done here.
 
2012-04-26 03:24:55 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
Yes. Yes you can.
 
2012-04-26 03:32:13 PM
FTA: he took two LCD screen TVs, valued at $476.

If you're gonna steal the small ones, may as well grab two.
 
2012-04-26 03:34:17 PM
I got zephyrhills from a hooker, but a shot of penicillin cleared it right up.
 
2012-04-26 03:34:29 PM
Oh come on. At least they could have tried Kmart instead. The one around here has a record of 8 canoes being nonchalantly carried over the heads of 3 people from the back to the front, out the door, onto the car, and driven away. The record spans 15 years. 3 of those took place after the door scanners were put in
 
2012-04-26 03:35:18 PM

Sybarite: 34-year-old Frederick Leon Gallimore

There are Wal-Mart greeters under the age of 70?


Only the retarded ones.

/welkum to wa-ma! Can I hel-Chocolate Milk!
 
2012-04-26 03:37:07 PM
Maybe I'm old, but $472 isn't worth getting my name in the paper, and a rap sheet.
 
2012-04-26 03:38:02 PM

chaosweaver: Sybarite: 34-year-old Frederick Leon Gallimore
There are Wal-Mart greeters under the age of 70?
Only the retarded ones.
/welkum to wa-ma! Can I hel-Chocolate Milk!


Welcome to WalMart, my name is Wee Todd Didd.
 
2012-04-26 03:38:40 PM
"two LCD screen TVs, valued at $476"

was gonna say they must be 19-inchers, but it IS WalMart, who knows...
 
2012-04-26 03:39:29 PM
I mean.... I absolutely just cannot understand this farking level of stupidity. I mean, seriously, you show up at your job WITH the guy, and then help him load the shiat into the car? This motherfarker has got to be farking retarded.
 
2012-04-26 03:41:08 PM

HotLonelyTeenageGirl: I mean.... I absolutely just cannot understand this farking level of stupidity. I mean, seriously, you show up at your job WITH the guy, and then help him load the shiat into the car? This motherfarker has got to be farking retarded.


Yup, I think we covered that.
 
2012-04-26 03:41:34 PM
Best thing to do is just walk out the door like ya bought the thing. Most of those greeters don't check receipts anyway.
 
2012-04-26 03:43:16 PM

HotLonelyTeenageGirl: I mean.... I absolutely just cannot understand this farking level of stupidity. I mean, seriously, you show up at your job WITH the guy, and then help him load the shiat into the car? This motherfarker has got to be farking retarded.


Welcome to WalMart, my name is Wee Todd Didd.
 
Nib
2012-04-26 03:45:07 PM

cwolf20: Oh come on. At least they could have tried Kmart instead. The one around here has a record of 8 canoes being nonchalantly carried over the heads of 3 people from the back to the front, out the door, onto the car, and driven away. The record spans 15 years. 3 of those took place after the door scanners were put in


I'm confused, How do you know this? Do you work at that K-Mart? Do you keep track of canoes stolen in your area for the last 20 years? Was this on the news? HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS INFORMATION?!?
 
2012-04-26 03:47:50 PM

Nib: cwolf20: Oh come on. At least they could have tried Kmart instead. The one around here has a record of 8 canoes being nonchalantly carried over the heads of 3 people from the back to the front, out the door, onto the car, and driven away. The record spans 15 years. 3 of those took place after the door scanners were put in

I'm confused, How do you know this? Do you work at that K-Mart? Do you keep track of canoes stolen in your area for the last 20 years? Was this on the news? HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS INFORMATION?!?


He's still quite proud of his accomplishments in the field of retail theft.
 
2012-04-26 03:51:27 PM
Greeter owed the dude $100, couldn't pay it, and this is what happened. Helping dude load it was just him going the extra mile.
 
2012-04-26 03:52:12 PM

cig-mkr: Maybe I'm old, but $472 isn't worth getting my name in the paper, and a rap sheet.


Nothing from Wal-Mart is worth that. Stealing the whole freaking store wouldn't be worth that.
 
2012-04-26 03:54:43 PM
Now that's love!

img28.imageshack.us
 
2012-04-26 04:04:24 PM
Like 12 years ago when I use to work on Albertsons, there was this big black man who, every Saturday, would come in and grab two of those suitcases of beer in each hand and simply walk out the door with them.

He did it once a week for over a year I worked there.

The problem was the liquor department was literally right next to the door. Albertsons had or has a policy for employees to not chase after any shoplifter once they leave the building and they were too cheap to pay for an officer.
 
2012-04-26 04:08:19 PM
It's a sad fact of retail that a good chunk of the people taking the five fingered discount are employees.

When I served on the grand jury for my county, I was somewhat surprised to discover that our local Walmart was the nexus for theft crime in the county, so much so that there's a reserved parking spot just for the police. I never could decide if it's just that so many people go there or instead is it just that the people who try to steal from there are so dumb and that they are caught more.
 
2012-04-26 04:08:56 PM
Working at a WalMart to getting a kick...excuse me, be right back, have to go help a customer load something....
 
2012-04-26 04:12:47 PM

Bunnyhat: Like 12 years ago when I use to work on Albertsons, there was this big black man who, every Saturday, would come in and grab two of those suitcases of beer in each hand and simply walk out the door with them.

He did it once a week for over a year I worked there.

The problem was the liquor department was literally right next to the door. Albertsons had or has a policy for employees to not chase after any shoplifter once they leave the building and they were too cheap to pay for an officer.


totally germane!
 
2012-04-26 04:14:20 PM
I have read that we had slightly more clever thieves in New Zealand's version of Walmart (The Warehouse)

They would scour the parking lot for reciepts, take them in to the store, pick the associated item from the shelves, and "return" it for a refund.
 
2012-04-26 04:15:02 PM

Bunnyhat: big black man would grab two of those suitcases of beer and simply walk out the door

.

diaryofahollywoodstreetking.com
 
2012-04-26 04:16:19 PM
Musta been cheap ass TV's? No great loss.
 
2012-04-26 04:19:55 PM

SpikeStrip: totally germane!


Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.
 
2012-04-26 04:28:12 PM

Persnickety: I never could decide if it's just that so many people go there or instead is it just that the people who try to steal from there are so dumb and that they are caught more.


Little bit from column A, little bit from column B.
 
2012-04-26 04:29:15 PM

HotLonelyTeenageGirl: I mean.... I absolutely just cannot understand this farking level of stupidity. I mean, seriously, you show up at your job WITH the guy, and then help him load the shiat into the car? This motherfarker has got to be farking retarded.


he's only 34 and a Wal-Mart greeter. My guess if he doesn't have a degree in theoretical physics from Cal-Tech but I could be wrong.
 
2012-04-26 04:36:20 PM

Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.


if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?
 
2012-04-26 04:38:03 PM

SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?


You go around looking for ways to get offended, don't you?
 
2012-04-26 04:44:03 PM

chaosweaver: Sybarite: 34-year-old Frederick Leon Gallimore

There are Wal-Mart greeters under the age of 70?

Only the retarded ones.

/welkum to wa-ma! Can I hel-Chocolate Milk!


Not cool.
 
2012-04-26 04:44:21 PM

SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?


If he was white he probably would not have called him black,

So I guess No.
 
2012-04-26 04:47:33 PM

fat boy: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

If he was white he probably would not have called him black,

So I guess No.


Also, if he were white, he probably would have paid for his beer.
 
2012-04-26 04:48:15 PM

Persnickety: It's a sad fact of retail that a good chunk of the people taking the five fingered discount are employees.

When I served on the grand jury for my county, I was somewhat surprised to discover that our local Walmart was the nexus for theft crime in the county, so much so that there's a reserved parking spot just for the police. I never could decide if it's just that so many people go there or instead is it just that the people who try to steal from there are so dumb and that they are caught more.


There is a police substation located inside the WalMart where I live.
 
2012-04-26 04:48:36 PM

Gyrfalcon: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

You go around looking for ways to get offended, don't you?


your notion offends me.
 
2012-04-26 04:51:30 PM

SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?


If he was white, I probably wouldn't have said he was black, no.
 
2012-04-26 04:53:27 PM

Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.


So what you're saying is his BAL was never over the legal limit?
 
2012-04-26 04:54:17 PM

Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.


96 cans a week is only a bit more than 13 beers a night, and since it's Miller Lite we're talking about, that's about six or seven actual beers. I'm pretty sure I could have done that back when I was in prime drinking shape, but back then I couldn't afford it. Although this dude seems to have solved that problem.
 
2012-04-26 04:56:38 PM

Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

If he was white, I probably wouldn't have said he was black, no.


so you would have written "big white man"?
 
2012-04-26 05:04:08 PM
$476? how is that felony theft?
 
2012-04-26 05:11:26 PM

Persnickety: It's a sad fact of retail that a good chunk of the people taking the five fingered discount are employees.

When I served on the grand jury for my county, I was somewhat surprised to discover that our local Walmart was the nexus for theft crime in the county, so much so that there's a reserved parking spot just for the police. I never could decide if it's just that so many people go there or instead is it just that the people who try to steal from there are so dumb and that they are caught more.


and that's why you can save a bundle by buying razor blades and similar goodies on eBay.
 
2012-04-26 05:18:42 PM

SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

If he was white, I probably wouldn't have said he was black, no.

so you would have written "big white man"?


Yes. It's simply a description. Untwist your panties. There is nothing racist to realize that there are in fact different races.
 
2012-04-26 05:18:50 PM
Receipt checker? Once I pay for and item(s) I own it and don't need to show anybody a receipt.
 
2012-04-26 05:19:50 PM

toraque: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

96 cans a week is only a bit more than 13 beers a night, and since it's Miller Lite we're talking about, that's about six or seven actual beers. I'm pretty sure I could have done that back when I was in prime drinking shape, but back then I couldn't afford it. Although this dude seems to have solved that problem.


To be fair, the guy had to have weighed closer to 260 pounds and it looked like pure muscle. I doubt 13 Miler Lites even got the dude buzzed.
 
2012-04-26 05:20:43 PM
Back in the day while going to school I worked for Skaggs.
I caught a high schooler a male stealing condoms
I cold busted him sticking them down his pants so I had him follow me to the back of the store. He gave me the package and i started the usual bs rant about the trouble he could be in. I told him he was lucky I caught him instead of the loss prevention asshat. I opened the package and handed him the contents and told him to stick them in his pocket and GTF out of here. I couldn't bust a teenager who was stealing condoms just not right.
 
2012-04-26 05:25:05 PM

Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

If he was white, I probably wouldn't have said he was black, no.

so you would have written "big white man"?

Yes.


heh. bullshiat.
 
2012-04-26 05:36:13 PM
i want more crazy shoplifting stories.
 
2012-04-26 05:37:10 PM

SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: Bunnyhat: SpikeStrip: totally germane!

Not trying to be racist, but it was the only two things I knew about the man. He was big. He was black. And he went through 96 cans of Miller Lite a week.

if he were white, would you have used that descriptive?

If he was white, I probably wouldn't have said he was black, no.

so you would have written "big white man"?

Yes.

heh. bullshiat.


OK, so you DO go around looking for ways to get offended.
 
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