If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   Really, who doesn't enjoy farewell intercourse?   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 305
    More: Sick, farewell intercourse, Egypt, conscriptions, minimum age, National Council on Disability, status of women, sick comedy, Moroccan  
•       •       •

29539 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Apr 2012 at 3:04 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



305 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-04-26 05:56:11 PM  
They clearly felt that they needed to give it a time frame. If they had made the law so that men couldn't have sex with their dead wives once their temperature dropped below, say, 97 degrees all the men would have gone out and bought wife sized microwaves for reheating purposes.
 
2012-04-26 05:56:15 PM  

Slaxl:
"It will also see the minimum age of marriage lowered to 14 and the ridding of women's rights of getting education and employment."

As always the headline focuses on completely the wrong thing. That is far worse than letting a guy screw a corpse.


this. Since women are allowed to do the same to men under the same law, it's not really a "women as objects" issue - it's just a sick-as-fark issue. The abolition of women's rights to education and employment is far, far more important.
 
2012-04-26 05:58:21 PM  
I get that promise the funeral home makes about "no sex with dead bodies" is totally out the window now.
 
2012-04-26 05:58:23 PM  

Janky_McGank: At first, they were all: "Right wingers hate and bom all the mooslimbs LOL"

Then, they were all like: "This is paradise for teh right wingers rebulicans gop loL"

Just a friendly reminder for the team red/team blue cheerleaders to keep their demagoguery consistent for maximum effect. It's confusing for us regular jackoffs, when y'all can't keep your tropes and cliches straight.


It's simple. Liberals and Conservatives agree on less and less every day. However, both sides of the spectrum agree on this one--you don't fark dead people. They also agree that 14 year olds have no business getting married, and that women have the right (most all would say inalienable right) to get an education and be employed. They might argue about whether moms and kids are better off if mom is at home to be the primary care giver to the children, but that is a minor point in comparison to forcing women to live in the 11th century.
 
2012-04-26 06:00:49 PM  
So maybe they were putting this in place to LIMIT it to 6 hours. That's progress.
 
2012-04-26 06:02:05 PM  

Oznog: Egypt has been plagued with election erection troubles, keep that in mind.


FTFY, MacArthur
 
2012-04-26 06:10:10 PM  
sexylosers.com

Seen buying a one way ticket to Egypt...
 
2012-04-26 06:11:44 PM  

Trucker: "White ones with black ones"
"Yellow ones with red ones"
"Necrophillacs looking for dead ones"

/Obscure?


Shel Silverstein is never obscure.
 
2012-04-26 06:13:48 PM  
To be fair, the article says the law would also allow wives to have sex with their dead husbands. See ladies? Quit complaining about losing the right to get an education an employment, sheesh!!
 
2012-04-26 06:21:01 PM  

Politicandy: To be fair, the article says the law would also allow wives to have sex with their dead husbands. See ladies? Quit complaining about losing the right to get an education an employment, sheesh!!


"You said you wanted your husband's body for one last fling--"

"And fling I did!"

"But this poor guy looks like hamburger! And what's with that baseball bat?"

"Um...he liked it rough."
 
2012-04-26 06:21:11 PM  
I realize that the "till death do we do nothing different" part is what is getting the press, and it's probably because the media will then gloss over everything else........but am I the only one wondering "Was corpse farking happening on such a large scale that someone needed to take a bold stand and say "we're expressly making this legal! On purpose! For real! Have at!""
 
2012-04-26 06:21:53 PM  
The deceased often remain hovering about in their subtle body after they die. I pity the poor Egyptian wife who gets to watch her husband getting it on with her corpse.
 
2012-04-26 06:24:33 PM  
Err, the deceased don't die. I know that.
 
2012-04-26 06:30:36 PM  
Congealed and cooling is not sexy. Plus don't you void your bowls on death?
 
2012-04-26 06:32:16 PM  
Does rigor mortis affect the labia minora? Seems like you'd want to know this before diving in.
 
2012-04-26 06:34:44 PM  

Contrabulous Flabtraption: LOL, Islam is stupid.

/cue the "every religion sucks" comments because you're too much a PC pussy to say one thing sucks worse than another


Don't worry. By 2016, Rick Santorum will have adopted this as part of his platform, claiming it's a basic Christian principle.
 
2012-04-26 06:35:45 PM  
MythDragon: There once was a man named Dave,
Who dug up a whore from the grave.
She was moldy as shiat,
and missing a tit,
but think of the money he saved!




So, necrophilia also means never having to pay her to leave???
 
2012-04-26 06:37:45 PM  
i.imgur.com

"Fark it, I'm gettin' one more before I call the police!
Just one more! Who is it hurting? I'm not hurtin' nobody.
I'll call 9-1-1! She's not gettin' any deader."
 
2012-04-26 06:53:35 PM  
so the wife can give the dead husband oral sex for 6 hrs.

i guess that's fair.
 
2012-04-26 06:54:58 PM  

Contrabulous Flabtraption: LOL, Islam is stupid.

/cue the "every religion sucks" comments because you're too much a PC pussy to say one thing sucks worse than another



/cue the "every religion sucks" comments because you're too much a PC pussy to say one thing sucks worse than another


Currently Islam sucks harder than all the other major religions, that hasn't always been true, sometimes Islam has been nicer to minorities than Christianity in the past. But right now Islam is the big sucky one when it comes to individual rights and Christianity is the big sucky one when it comes to support for pseudoscience.
 
2012-04-26 06:55:30 PM  
i can't believe we are even discussing this.
 
2012-04-26 06:55:59 PM  
He "sees" dead people?

;)
 
2012-04-26 07:06:06 PM  

tommydee: Brings new meaning to getting' a stiffie.

It's GOT to be a huge turn-on when they quit talking so much, though.


Ungh, leave it to Fark to come up with this stuff! Hahahah

Is this the culture that you can get married by saying three times "we're married, we're married, we're married"?
 
2012-04-26 07:06:17 PM  
*FAP*

/what?! Don't judge me!
 
2012-04-26 07:07:03 PM  
Those Egyptian men have always had a mummy complex.
 
2012-04-26 07:14:10 PM  

Latinwolf: All_Farked_Up: Treating women like property. Is this Islam or the GOP?

There's a difference?


Wow, you guys are seriously brainwashed. You must have some double-strong koolaid.
 
2012-04-26 07:14:12 PM  
Because it's more fun to think that it's true, rather than doing a simple Google search?

/fake story is fake
 
2012-04-26 07:15:35 PM  

xiola: nopokerface: Thank goodness we helped get rid of the idiots who used to be in charge. Things seem great now.

THIS.


THAT
 
2012-04-26 07:19:33 PM  

improvius: What's the big deal? Mormons get to fark people who've been dead for years.


MSNBCNYTCNNABCCBS?
 
2012-04-26 07:23:01 PM  
I'm sure the ladies would get in on the act if they could, but a dead husband just won't stiffen in the right place. Mustache rides maybe, but certainly coitus is out.
 
2012-04-26 07:23:12 PM  

xiola: nopokerface: Thank goodness we helped get rid of the idiots who used to be in charge. Things seem great now.

THIS.


At least they are choosing their path instead of a tiny elite choosing it for them.

I would argue that Egyptians are more free that Americans at this point in history.
 
2012-04-26 07:29:07 PM  
Wow, 232 comments, and yet I'm the first to write:
Consent,
too drunk, unconscious, too young to decide, all these mean no consent.
 
2012-04-26 07:32:08 PM  

johnny queso: You can have my wife when you pry me from her cold dead hands.


WIN.
 
2012-04-26 07:35:40 PM  

DogBlack: Wow, 232 comments, and yet I'm the first to write:
Consent,
too drunk, unconscious, too young to decide, all these mean no consent.


But dead?
 
2012-04-26 07:38:56 PM  

DamnYankees: Here's what strikes me about this law - not that it's sick (which it is), but WHO THE FARK WAS LOBBYING FOR THIS? Who thought this was a serious societal problem? What. the. hell.


Well then you don't want to hear about the things they're trying to do in America.
 
2012-04-26 07:38:59 PM  
Female Suicide Bombers! Messy sex is the best sex.
 
2012-04-26 07:42:22 PM  
wow, just wow. purple monkey dishwasher. i want off this ride now please sir.
 
2012-04-26 07:45:46 PM  
In the U.S. only the IRS can legally fark you after you're dead.
 
2012-04-26 07:46:52 PM  
I'm a sick f*ck and this is still a little much for me.
 
2012-04-26 08:17:43 PM  

DogBlack: Wow, 232 comments, and yet I'm the first to write:
Consent,
too drunk, unconscious, too young to decide, all these mean no consent.


But you won't hear "No Stop" either.
 
2012-04-26 08:20:01 PM  

bim1154: DogBlack: Wow, 232 comments, and yet I'm the first to write:
Consent,
too drunk, unconscious, too young to decide, all these mean no consent.

But you won't hear "No Stop" either.


Given that (at that point) it's an inanimate object, not a living person, not really sure what the laws are...
 
2012-04-26 08:27:16 PM  

Latinwolf: FTA:
The subject of a husband having sex with his dead wife arose in May 2011 when Moroccan cleric Zamzami Abdul Bari said marriage remains valid even after death.

He also said that women have the right to have sex with her dead husband, alarabiya.net reported.

Unless that husband died with an erection and rigor mortis quickly set in, I don't see that happening.


Marry a man with a big nose.
 
2012-04-26 08:32:04 PM  

Mildot: Female Suicide Bombers! Messy sex is the best sex.


What the hell would you stick it in? A foot? A scrap of femur? Pile her up and aim for the middle?
 
2012-04-26 08:36:56 PM  
So she's still semi warm after less than 6 hrs, right?
 
2012-04-26 08:37:48 PM  
maybe they haven't figured out how to tell time yet.
 
2012-04-26 08:38:53 PM  
Who says Islam isn't for progress?
 
2012-04-26 08:54:29 PM  
Egyptian husbands will soon be legally allowed to have sex with their dead wives - for up to six hours after their death.

The controversial new law is part of a raft of measures being introduced by the Islamist-dominated parliament.

It will also see the minimum age of marriage lowered to 14 and the ridding of women's rights of getting education and employment.


/seriously, i knew you guys over there were still living in the 3rd century, but really? sex with dead women? Why not make it legal to fark donkey's too? It happens over there, might as well make it legal. And why not rape? You already stone to death women who have been raped, or at the least throw them out of the house as "tainted". Might as well lose the law that prevents the buggery of small boys too. Why not? Just throw anything resembling decency and human / women's rights right out the window and go full retard.
 
2012-04-26 09:05:49 PM  
So is this the first time in history a new democracy is intentionally making things worse than the autocrat they overthrew?

They are aware that if they make it so no one wants to come visit their newly medieval country they lose just about the last local industry they have (tourism)?
 
2012-04-26 09:07:43 PM  
I say team up with Russia to use our nuclear arsenal to nuke every Muslim to Allah. And you can't tell me the world wouldn't be a better place with them gone.
 
2012-04-26 09:11:25 PM  

AllUpInYa: Who has to clean her out, afterwards?


Same as a RealDoll - pressure washer.
 
Displayed 50 of 305 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report