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(io9)   Ten bizarre alien Jedi from the Star Wars universe. Yes, the Ewok Jedi was as useless as you'd expect   (io9.com) divider line 89
    More: Silly, Star Wars, Jedi, alien species, Expanded Universe, Samuel L Jackson, dark horse, Mickey Mouse Club, Obi-Wan Kenobi  
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14442 clicks; posted to Geek » on 25 Apr 2012 at 11:51 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-25 11:56:18 PM  
"Yub, yub, Commander."
 
2012-04-25 11:56:40 PM  
Speaking as a lifelong fan of Star Wars, I have to say that was the stupidest article I've read about anything yet today, I've been reading the politics tab.
 
2012-04-25 11:59:14 PM  
thehomestarmy.com

/Just sayin'
 
2012-04-25 11:59:21 PM  
I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).
 
2012-04-26 12:01:37 AM  
What,no Gaunganese Jedi?

"Meesa feel the powah of the Force now!"
 
2012-04-26 12:02:50 AM  
Wasn't there a bunny rabbit or a squirrel or something that became a Jedi? He was a student of Yoda's and I'm ashamed to remember this.
 
2012-04-26 12:04:54 AM  
8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.


Wat?
 
2012-04-26 12:06:25 AM  
How could a Jedi Ewok possibly be considered weirder than the Jedi Hutt in the article? Jesus christ they can barely move, whereas ewoks actually had some pretty crafty war skills, demonstrated in the movies.

For that matter, how did Hutts exist as a political force in the Galaxy at all? It would be like if Rush Limbaugh wielded actually power waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit a minute.
 
2012-04-26 12:08:36 AM  

tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?


8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.
 
2012-04-26 12:13:18 AM  

Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).


Other than lift Luke's crashed X wing out of the mud Yoda never did anything conclusively badassed in the films.

Fight with Saruman Dooku : failure

Fight with Emperor : failure


He's an intergalactic AAA towtruck operator at best.
 
2012-04-26 12:14:43 AM  

timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.


Wat?
 
2012-04-26 12:18:42 AM  
img163.imageshack.us
 
2012-04-26 12:19:50 AM  

tryptik: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?


8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.


/christ, are you friggin death?
 
2012-04-26 12:21:43 AM  
I would have gone for Jedediah
 
2012-04-26 12:29:06 AM  
/christ, are you friggin death?

Mebbe...
 
2012-04-26 12:29:36 AM  
10 more reasons that the Sith are better.
 
2012-04-26 12:49:35 AM  

Oldiron_79: 10 more reasons that the Sith are better.


Evil will always triumph because good is dumb.
 
2012-04-26 12:50:37 AM  

Apos: What,no Gaunganese Jedi?

"Meesa feel the powah of the Force now!"


SHHHHH!! They might be reading this.
 
2012-04-26 12:53:01 AM  
othersideoftheplanet.com
 
2012-04-26 01:02:23 AM  

One Bad Apple: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

Other than lift Luke's crashed X wing out of the mud Yoda never did anything conclusively badassed in the films.

Fight with Saruman Dooku : failure

Fight with Emperor : failure


He's an intergalactic AAA towtruck operator at best.


Hand over the highest infested Forse-potential ever seen to a greenhorn Jedi who's never trained anyone: Utter and complete failure.

Yoda is an idiot.
 
2012-04-26 01:11:27 AM  

fearmongert: tryptik: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

/christ, are you friggin death?


Wat?
 
2012-04-26 01:18:57 AM  
When ones starts digging into the basement of Wookepedia, the whole thing really starts to fall apart.

This is one of many differences between Star Trek and Star Wars. And why JJ Abrams should be making Star Wars movies and not Star Trek movies.
 
2012-04-26 01:21:53 AM  

Ed Grubermann: One Bad Apple: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

Other than lift Luke's crashed X wing out of the mud Yoda never did anything conclusively badassed in the films.

Fight with Saruman Dooku : failure

Fight with Emperor : failure


He's an intergalactic AAA towtruck operator at best.

Hand over the highest infested Forse-potential ever seen to a greenhorn Jedi who's never trained anyone: Utter and complete failure.

Yoda is an idiot.


that wasn't his choice. The council refused training altogether (mainly on Mace's opinion)Qui-Gonn and then Anakin defied them and trained him anyway.

Yoda didn't lose to Dooku. He was kicking Dooku's ass before the count ran for it.

As for the Emperor, well he threw the senate at him. The whole senate!

The kind of crap in that article is why I couldn't read the EU books. I played the RPG and was a Felinoid Jedi I described as looking like Bill the Cat in Jedi robes. It's one thing to have that in a group of dorks having fun. Its quite another to put stuff like that in a book and expect it to be taken seriously.
 
2012-04-26 01:31:00 AM  
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of
 
2012-04-26 01:34:45 AM  
images.wikia.com

I think this is the character I was looking for... there was a Jedi that was just a brain in a jar.
 
2012-04-26 01:42:24 AM  
www.swagonline.net

Elata Tey?
 
2012-04-26 02:42:13 AM  

Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).


There was an Ewok in Rogue Squadron for a while, IIRC he had to use prosthetics to fly his X-wing.
 
2012-04-26 02:45:42 AM  

xant: How could a Jedi Ewok possibly be considered weirder than the Jedi Hutt in the article? Jesus christ they can barely move, whereas ewoks actually had some pretty crafty war skills, demonstrated in the movies.

For that matter, how did Hutts exist as a political force in the Galaxy at all? It would be like if Rush Limbaugh wielded actually power waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit a minute.


Hutts are intelligent, crafty, very long lived, and keep growing as they get older. They can crush most humanoids, fighting like an enraged bull sea lion. On the other hand, they tend to get lazy as they get older, using hoverbarges to get around when other Hutts aren't around to see them. Their business ethics are rather loose, moreso than Ferengi, and they form family based crime syndicates based on drug smuggling, slave trading, and so forth.
 
2012-04-26 02:51:22 AM  

Cyno01: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

There was an Ewok in Rogue Squadron for a while, IIRC he had to use prosthetics to fly his X-wing.


That was more of a running gag in Wraith Squadron, when they were impersonating a pirate band, and they used voice changers on the radio, and someone made Wedge Antillies' voice sound like an ewok. So for one big battle, he had to dress in all black, with an ewok puppet on his chest to maintain the illusion.. then later on someone found an actual ewok on Warlord Zinj's SSD who really could pilot ships, with a background that matched the fictional one they'd invented.
 
2012-04-26 02:52:32 AM  
Now, after geeking out those last two posts.. no, I have not heard of any of the Jedi in the article.
 
2012-04-26 02:54:02 AM  
Someday I'm gonna commission someone to draw a badass Jedi Master Splinter vs Darth Shredder comic.
 
2012-04-26 02:57:56 AM  

Alphax: Cyno01: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

There was an Ewok in Rogue Squadron for a while, IIRC he had to use prosthetics to fly his X-wing.

That was more of a running gag in Wraith Squadron, when they were impersonating a pirate band, and they used voice changers on the radio, and someone made Wedge Antillies' voice sound like an ewok. So for one big battle, he had to dress in all black, with an ewok puppet on his chest to maintain the illusion.. then later on someone found an actual ewok on Warlord Zinj's SSD who really could pilot ships, with a background that matched the fictional one they'd invented.


Wow. Way to outnerd someone whos watched all 6 series and 10 movies of star trek in chronological order by episode in only 8 months. Bravo sir, bravo.
 
2012-04-26 03:04:33 AM  

Fano: [images.wikia.com image 416x448]

I think this is the character I was looking for... there was a Jedi that was just a brain in a jar.



Despite my cool car, I'm still just a brain in a jar.

/I'm_sorry
 
2012-04-26 03:20:04 AM  
Ewok Jedi is still less of a pussy than Hayden Christensen
 
2012-04-26 03:23:06 AM  

xant: How could a Jedi Ewok possibly be considered weirder than the Jedi Hutt in the article? Jesus christ they can barely move, whereas ewoks actually had some pretty crafty war skills, demonstrated in the movies.

For that matter, how did Hutts exist as a political force in the Galaxy at all? It would be like if Rush Limbaugh wielded actually power waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit a minute.


They exist because Lucas decided to take a petty jab at Coppola's wildly successful Godfather films, and sadly that's all there is to it.
 
2012-04-26 03:38:38 AM  

Wayne 985: Wasn't there a bunny rabbit or a squirrel or something that became a Jedi? He was a student of Yoda's and I'm ashamed to remember this.


This guy?

images1.wikia.nocookie.net

Ikrit?
 
2012-04-26 04:19:22 AM  

One Bad Apple: Other than lift Luke's crashed X wing out of the mud Yoda never did anything conclusively badassed in the films.

Fight with Saruman Dooku : failure

Fight with Emperor : failure

He's an intergalactic AAA towtruck operator at best.


Be fair. I'm not sure what to say about that fight w/ Dooku, but you'd totally have to be a badass to even survive that fight with the Emperor and you know it.
 
2012-04-26 04:46:44 AM  
I am quite ok with a Jedi/Sith wampa. :D
 
2012-04-26 05:58:29 AM  
Yoda is portrayed a little bit better in The Clone Wars.... in one episode, he took out an entire droid battalion by himself.
 
2012-04-26 06:20:04 AM  

Cyno01: Alphax: Cyno01: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

There was an Ewok in Rogue Squadron for a while, IIRC he had to use prosthetics to fly his X-wing.

That was more of a running gag in Wraith Squadron, when they were impersonating a pirate band, and they used voice changers on the radio, and someone made Wedge Antillies' voice sound like an ewok. So for one big battle, he had to dress in all black, with an ewok puppet on his chest to maintain the illusion.. then later on someone found an actual ewok on Warlord Zinj's SSD who really could pilot ships, with a background that matched the fictional one they'd invented.

Wow. Way to outnerd someone whos watched all 6 series and 10 movies of star trek in chronological order by episode in only 8 months. Bravo sir, bravo.


I must direct you to the Boobies in the whole thread.

Count_0: "Yub, yub, Commander."


Say what you will, I still consider the Rogue Squadron series my favorite Star Wars: EU novels. And by novel, I mean a modern equivalent of the dime novels from ages ago. Yeah, Corran Horn might have been a bit of a mary sue, but he did grow into something more.

To be honest, the Starfighters of Adumar was my favorite Rogue Squadron book. Why? Because it was old Rogue Squadron being badasses on a random planet that equated fighter pilots to gods.

As far as the article went, it was meh. They cited more non-canon sources than canon.
 
2012-04-26 06:31:17 AM  

Kelvron: To be honest, the Starfighters of Adumar was my favorite Rogue Squadron book. Why? Because it was old Rogue Squadron being badasses on a random planet that equated fighter pilots to gods.


It also got Wedge back together with his Corellian girlfriend, whose name I can't spell from memory.
 
2012-04-26 07:05:05 AM  
I thought Tyvokka was cool. I didn't like it when Lucas said no more Wookiee Jedi. As if Wookiee Jedi are anymore ridiculous than Gungans, etc.

wippit: Yoda is portrayed a little bit better in The Clone Wars.... in one episode, he took out an entire droid battalion by himself.


The CGI one or the Tartakovsky series?
 
2012-04-26 07:23:48 AM  

Cyno01: Alphax: Cyno01: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

There was an Ewok in Rogue Squadron for a while, IIRC he had to use prosthetics to fly his X-wing.

That was more of a running gag in Wraith Squadron, when they were impersonating a pirate band, and they used voice changers on the radio, and someone made Wedge Antillies' voice sound like an ewok. So for one big battle, he had to dress in all black, with an ewok puppet on his chest to maintain the illusion.. then later on someone found an actual ewok on Warlord Zinj's SSD who really could pilot ships, with a background that matched the fictional one they'd invented.

Wow. Way to outnerd someone whos watched all 6 series and 10 movies of star trek in chronological order by episode in only 8 months. Bravo sir, bravo.


What took you so long?
 
2012-04-26 08:10:28 AM  
Yub yub
 
2012-04-26 08:28:45 AM  
www.javenackerman.com
t3.gstatic.com
blog.thaeger.com
api.ning.com
 
2012-04-26 08:30:48 AM  

Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of


In another time and place...
 
2012-04-26 08:34:54 AM  

Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of


That green rabbit man, whatever he was. I was given a Star Wars comic book with him in it, long ago. It didn't seem to have much of anything to do with Star Wars, save that the antagonist seemed to hate Luke Skywalker because Luke had droid friends. But Luke wasn't in the comic.
 
2012-04-26 08:49:00 AM  

Alphax: Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of

That green rabbit man, whatever he was.


Bucky O'Hare is what I thought it was from the look of it and as far as I'm aware had nothing to actually do with Star Wars. Although I'd have to question who ripped who off over that one if the green rabbit is, actually, a SW character.
 
2012-04-26 08:50:00 AM  
Any living thing can have the Force.

That does not automatically make them cool
or qualified
or trained
or talented

Of course, this guideline should be used for ANY skill or ability.

BTW...being a Force-user is not just about using Lightsabers or physical prowess.

/got to love the Jedi Kittens...
 
2012-04-26 08:50:22 AM  

Vaneshi: Alphax: Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of

That green rabbit man, whatever he was.

Bucky O'Hare is what I thought it was from the look of it and as far as I'm aware had nothing to actually do with Star Wars. Although I'd have to question who ripped who off over that one if the green rabbit is, actually, a SW character.


Must be something else.. I think I had that comic book before 1980..
 
2012-04-26 08:56:14 AM  

Vaneshi: Alphax: Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of

That green rabbit man, whatever he was.

Bucky O'Hare is what I thought it was from the look of it and as far as I'm aware had nothing to actually do with Star Wars. Although I'd have to question who ripped who off over that one if the green rabbit is, actually, a SW character.


His name was Jaxxon, and he was mentioned in the article. He was in the Marvel comics from around 1980
 
2012-04-26 08:59:25 AM  

Fano: His name was Jaxxon, and he was mentioned in the article. He was in the Marvel comics from around 1980


I think that sounds right. There was some hot human woman with him, IIRC. 32 years ago, hard to remember.
 
2012-04-26 09:03:57 AM  

Fano:
His name was Jaxxon, and he was mentioned in the article. He was in the Marvel comics from around 1980


TIL exactly when the Star Wars franchise started going down hill.

/It's an io9 link, I ain't clicking that farker for all the tea in china.
 
2012-04-26 09:09:28 AM  
Before the dark times. Before the Empire...

29.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-04-26 09:13:58 AM  

Enemabag Jones: When ones starts digging into the basement of Wookepedia, the whole thing really starts to fall apart.

This is one of many differences between Star Trek and Star Wars. And why JJ Abrams should be making Star Wars movies and not Star Trek movies.


Seriously, this. You can't just start claiming anything is a Jedi. Force abilites, sure. But a Wampa? Come on. You can't just take your favorite character and give it a light saber. Well, you can, but it's crappy writing.

/Saw Star Wars "Operation" in a toy store yesterday. You're pulling parts out of R-2. *Sigh*
 
2012-04-26 09:23:49 AM  
8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.


Some clarification: "Skippy" was a short comic feature that was not just expanded universe, but explicitly a humor piece from Dark Horse's "Infinities" line of "screw canon for the fun of it" stories.

As I recall, a panel showing the droid graveyard inside the sandcrawler (Episode 4) had lots of shout-outs to other pop culture robots like Bender and the MST3K robots. It was that kind of tone.

Yes, Star Wars went totally off the rails a long time ago, but for what it's worth they didn't seriously foist "Skippy the Jedi Droid" on us.
 
2012-04-26 09:25:11 AM  

Digitalstrange: I played the RPG and was a Felinoid Jedi I described as looking like Bill the Cat in Jedi robes.


Wait, really? I once ran an RPG session where the players met a 9 foot tall rancor runt that acted and sounded like Bill the Cat! Even coughed up hairballs for some strange reason.
 
2012-04-26 09:39:45 AM  

PanicMan: Enemabag Jones: When ones starts digging into the basement of Wookepedia, the whole thing really starts to fall apart.

This is one of many differences between Star Trek and Star Wars. And why JJ Abrams should be making Star Wars movies and not Star Trek movies.

Seriously, this. You can't just start claiming anything is a Jedi. Force abilites, sure. But a Wampa? Come on. You can't just take your favorite character and give it a light saber. Well, you can, but it's crappy writing.

/Saw Star Wars "Operation" in a toy store yesterday. You're pulling parts out of R-2. *Sigh*


And yet we can't get another line of starship miniatures. And no, Fantasy Flight's lineup is woefully inadequate and only does starfighters, no capital ships.
 
2012-04-26 09:50:00 AM  

timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.


Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?
 
2012-04-26 09:55:34 AM  
As a veteran of innumerable Sith Wars on RASSM (and if you know what that is, may G*nk have pity on your soul), leaving out G*nk (or Gonk to you blasphemous heathens) is unforgivable.

Any droid can be a Jedi. It takes a POWER droid to become a god.Link
 
2012-04-26 10:05:34 AM  

Magorn: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?


http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Midi-chloroxian
 
2012-04-26 10:22:47 AM  

timharrod: Magorn: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Midi-chloroxian


Oh Jesus farking Christ.
 
2012-04-26 10:41:09 AM  

born_yesterday: timharrod: Magorn: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Midi-chloroxian

Oh Jesus farking Christ.


You said it better than I could. Man I love SF, in nearly ever color and flavor under the rainbow, I've got hundreds of SF books in my Library from the earliest days of the golden age to some of the weirest of the post modernists. I even have special place in my heart for the pure pulp, and space opera genres, The Princess of Mars and Ming the Merciless kind of baroque SF fantasy. Yet it is stuff like this that explains why, even though I really enjoyed the first 2/1/2 movies and at least tolerated the remainder, I do not and will not own a single star wars novel. Honestly, the universe has become so convulted its simply too stupid to enjoy on any level.
 
2012-04-26 10:48:13 AM  
Kelvron:

To be honest, the Starfighters of Adumar was my favorite Rogue Squadron book. Why? Because it was old Rogue Squadron being badasses on a random planet that equated fighter pilots to gods.


As far as the article went, it was meh. They cited more non-canon sources than canon.

I love that book, my favorite quote from almost the whole series comes from that one.

Wedge: Sithspit! What's that?
Janson: That's the sun Wedge. It's after dawn
Wedge: Well, it offends me. Turn it off
Janson: It's a 130, 140 million klicks from here
Wedge: Go up in your X-Wing and shoot it down for me
 
2012-04-26 11:10:27 AM  

Magorn: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?


cuz the 'droids' are actually misshapenned Daleks with memories wiped?

hee.
 
2012-04-26 11:16:04 AM  
or a perhaps it even goes deeper . . .

www.wired.com


\*whirrr**beep*EXTERMINATE
 
2012-04-26 11:16:59 AM  

timharrod: Magorn: timharrod: tryptik: 8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Wat?

8.) Skippy the Droid
In Star Wars lore, there exists the legend of Skippy, a Force-sensitive R5-D4 unit who caused himself to malfunction so that the Jawas could sell R2-D2 to Luke Skywalker.

Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Midi-chloroxian


Ok... as POHR as that is... its not without precedent. In fact, robots exceeding their capacities because of some special oil... that sounds like a downright rip off of something else...

images.wikia.com
 
2012-04-26 11:36:31 AM  

Eddie T. Head: Wayne 985: Wasn't there a bunny rabbit or a squirrel or something that became a Jedi? He was a student of Yoda's and I'm ashamed to remember this.

This guy?

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x403]

Ikrit?


He got killed in one of the NJO books. Thank God.
 
2012-04-26 12:11:17 PM  

Alphax: Kelvron: To be honest, the Starfighters of Adumar was my favorite Rogue Squadron book. Why? Because it was old Rogue Squadron being badasses on a random planet that equated fighter pilots to gods.

It also got Wedge back together with his Corellian girlfriend, whose name I can't spell from memory.


You mean Iella Wessiri, Corran Horn's old Cor-Sec partner? (Admittedly, the only books I've read are the X-wing series and I, Jedi, so it's possible Wedge had a diff't girlfriend, and Starfighters is a bit blurry for me atm.)

/girl nerds ftw
//would totally have Coran Horn's babies
///And Mirax's too
/slashies!
 
2012-04-26 12:13:38 PM  

Magorn: Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?


that was the thing i never picked up on. Did they ever state that the midi-chlorians were the cause of force sensitivity? It seemed from the way they were introduced that they could very well be an effect of being force sensitive. like anti-bodies form when you're exposed to certain diseases, midi-chlorians form when a creature is exposed to lots of the force. i've never figured where the cause vs. effect argument was settled
 
2012-04-26 12:14:46 PM  

The English Major: Eddie T. Head: Wayne 985: Wasn't there a bunny rabbit or a squirrel or something that became a Jedi? He was a student of Yoda's and I'm ashamed to remember this.

This guy?

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x403]

Ikrit?

He got killed in one of the NJO books. Thank God.


They actually did something right in the NJO books? I'm skeptical.

/quit reading EU books after Salvatore vomited out that tripe with Chewie
//WILL be buying Scoundrels when it's released
 
2012-04-26 12:25:02 PM  

Peki: Alphax: Kelvron: To be honest, the Starfighters of Adumar was my favorite Rogue Squadron book. Why? Because it was old Rogue Squadron being badasses on a random planet that equated fighter pilots to gods.

It also got Wedge back together with his Corellian girlfriend, whose name I can't spell from memory.

You mean Iella Wessiri, Corran Horn's old Cor-Sec partner? (Admittedly, the only books I've read are the X-wing series and I, Jedi, so it's possible Wedge had a diff't girlfriend, and Starfighters is a bit blurry for me atm.)

/girl nerds ftw
//would totally have Coran Horn's babies
///And Mirax's too
/slashies!


Iella, yes. I could say it, but not spell it..

Yeah, one of the other authors hooked Wedge up with an blue feathered scientist girl who had helped the Empire design the Death Star and Sun Crusher super weapons, in her naivety. The Admiral Dalla books.
 
2012-04-26 12:31:26 PM  

One Bad Apple: Honest Bender: I don't see why a jedi ewok couldn't be awesome. Yoda was a small scrawny swamp rat and he was quite possible the most bad ass jedi portrayed in the movies (I haven't read any books).

Other than lift Luke's crashed X wing out of the mud Yoda never did anything conclusively badassed in the films.

Fight with Saruman Dooku : failure

Fight with Emperor : failure


He's an intergalactic AAA towtruck operator at best.


I thought in the Episode III novelization Yoda had a premonition of the future during the Force lightning battle with the Emperor, realized it was not the time to defeat Palpatine, and that for the first time he understood the Prophecy about Anakin. Or something. The movie didn't quite make it out like that, because once Yoda fell to the floor of the Senate he skulked away with his "Into exile must I go" speech and all that.

I quit trying to understand the Star Wars movies after the Red Letter Media reviews. There's no way I can go to the extremes that guy goes. He compared Episode III to Citizen Kane, for chrissakes, and it MADE SENSE.
 
2012-04-26 12:40:57 PM  
All I know is that I have my daughter convinced that most jedi's get their hands cut off at some point such that it is basically a prerequisite to becoming a full fledged jedi knight.

(For whatever reason, the yoda action figure she has includes interchangeable hands, which bolsters my case immensely)
 
2012-04-26 01:02:24 PM  

UNC_Samurai: They actually did something right in the NJO books? I'm skeptical.

/quit reading EU books after Salvatore vomited out that tripe with Chewie
//WILL be buying Scoundrels when it's released



I gave up on them after the second book in the Fate of the Jedi series, though the Darth Bane books were worth reading as were Zahn's two Mara Jade books.
 
2012-04-26 01:19:22 PM  

tlchwi02: Magorn: Since we "now know" that Force sensitivity is caused by parasitic micro-organisms in your bloodstream, explain to me how a droid, a machine, could possibly be force sensitive?

that was the thing i never picked up on. Did they ever state that the midi-chlorians were the cause of force sensitivity? It seemed from the way they were introduced that they could very well be an effect of being force sensitive. like anti-bodies form when you're exposed to certain diseases, midi-chlorians form when a creature is exposed to lots of the force. i've never figured where the cause vs. effect argument was settled


Even though there is evidence that midi-chlorians were planned from the very beginning, it appears to be merely a plot device to establish conclusively that Anakin's power levels are "over 9000" and somehow necessary to explain why his son also would be extremely Force sensitive.

The Force is in fact in "everything" as Yoda (if he hasn't been proven to be a liar on the level of Baron Munchausen or Don Quixote) said: "Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship." I guess technically it could be some field given off by living things that penetrates everything, but at any rate it limits imagination, answers questions no one was asking, and doesn't make for anything more interesting to the storytelling. In my opinion, "the Force works, biatches" and needs little more explanation than that.

Did J.K. Rowling ever explain the mechanism by which magic worked, or the genetic capabilities of muggles, squibs, and mudbloods? If she did it was a waste of paper.
 
2012-04-26 01:26:24 PM  

Fano: "Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship."


ok, so its an energy field that is created by life and covers everything, including things that are not alive....

Fano: I guess technically it could be some field given off by living things that penetrates everything, but at any rate it limits imagination, answers questions no one was asking, and doesn't make for anything more interesting to the storytelling.


so what the heck is your point? you said above that its an energy field that covers everything according to yoda and then you follow it up with "i guess it could be an energy field that covers everything but thats boring and should never be explained."


and on top of that, what in the name of all that is holy does that have to do with my original point? I was wondering why people assume that midi-cholrians cause force power and aren't caused BY force powers- was it addressed in the EU? Did lucas say something on the "behind the scenes" footage for one of the DVDs? Did nostradamus predict the coming of this? what in the name of all that is holy does any part of your contradictory screed have to do with my simple question?
 
2012-04-26 02:03:10 PM  

tlchwi02: Fano: "Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship."

ok, so its an energy field that is created by life and covers everything, including things that are not alive....

Fano: I guess technically it could be some field given off by living things that penetrates everything, but at any rate it limits imagination, answers questions no one was asking, and doesn't make for anything more interesting to the storytelling.

so what the heck is your point? you said above that its an energy field that covers everything according to yoda and then you follow it up with "i guess it could be an energy field that covers everything but thats boring and should never be explained."


and on top of that, what in the name of all that is holy does that have to do with my original point? I was wondering why people assume that midi-cholrians cause force power and aren't caused BY force powers- was it addressed in the EU? Did lucas say something on the "behind the scenes" footage for one of the DVDs? Did nostradamus predict the coming of this? what in the name of all that is holy does any part of your contradictory screed have to do with my simple question?


Midichlorians

They are the basis of all life in the Star Wars universe, but Force sensitivity depends on having a certain cell count of midichlorians. Apparently they are the conduit that allows the Force to be tapped. In canon, they are only indicators for Force sensitivity, not something that causes the Force or creates it. Some Jedi believed that the midichlorians were created by the Force in order to connect with biologicals. Based on EU and canon, it does not appear to be some sort of immune reaction or byproduct of your Force abilities.

Does that calm the rage within you?
 
2012-04-26 02:59:32 PM  

UNC_Samurai: PanicMan: Enemabag Jones: When ones starts digging into the basement of Wookepedia, the whole thing really starts to fall apart.

This is one of many differences between Star Trek and Star Wars. And why JJ Abrams should be making Star Wars movies and not Star Trek movies.

Seriously, this. You can't just start claiming anything is a Jedi. Force abilites, sure. But a Wampa? Come on. You can't just take your favorite character and give it a light saber. Well, you can, but it's crappy writing.

/Saw Star Wars "Operation" in a toy store yesterday. You're pulling parts out of R-2. *Sigh*

And yet we can't get another line of starship miniatures. And no, Fantasy Flight's lineup is woefully inadequate and only does starfighters, no capital ships.


And everyone begs for a remake of Xwing vs Tie fighter, and we get goddamn dancing kinect star wars.
 
2012-04-26 03:09:33 PM  

PanicMan: And everyone begs for a remake of Xwing vs Tie fighter, and we get goddamn dancing kinect star wars.


to be fair, would you really want x-wing vs. tie fighter as developed for the Xbox 360? i wouldn't.
 
2012-04-26 04:34:05 PM  

Fano: Even though there is evidence that midi-chlorians were planned from the very beginning, it appears to be merely a plot device to establish conclusively that Anakin's power levels are "over 9000" and somehow necessary to explain why his son also would be extremely Force sensitive.


The smartest thing the Jedi ever did was forbid marriage and child-rearing when the entire basis of their power was a hereditary sensitivity to the Force.

Lucas, you're no Herbert
 
2012-04-26 07:23:51 PM  

Fano: Vaneshi: Alphax: Fano: [images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 250x404]

Sadly, never had Force powers... that we know of

That green rabbit man, whatever he was.

Bucky O'Hare is what I thought it was from the look of it and as far as I'm aware had nothing to actually do with Star Wars. Although I'd have to question who ripped who off over that one if the green rabbit is, actually, a SW character.

His name was Jaxxon, and he was mentioned in the article. He was in the Marvel comics from around 1980


Yup, Jaxxon was part of a "Magnificent Seven" storyline in a SW comic which Marvel had around then. Han Solo was on a planet and had to recruit a bunch of mercs to help defend a village.

/Geek check - DING!
 
2012-04-26 11:56:30 PM  

PanicMan: /Saw Star Wars "Operation" in a toy store yesterday. You're pulling parts out of R-2. *Sigh*


Not as egregiously ridiculous as all those licensed-character Mr. Potato Heads. MPH is supposed to be a creativity toy where you decide what the finished product looks like! The Star Wars, etc. MPHs completely discard that whole concept for something that's already built, and then I guess you put it on a shelf and look at it.
 
2012-04-27 12:17:30 AM  

timharrod: PanicMan: /Saw Star Wars "Operation" in a toy store yesterday. You're pulling parts out of R-2. *Sigh*

Not as egregiously ridiculous as all those licensed-character Mr. Potato Heads. MPH is supposed to be a creativity toy where you decide what the finished product looks like! The Star Wars, etc. MPHs completely discard that whole concept for something that's already built, and then I guess you put it on a shelf and look at it.


I have 9 of the liscensed mr potato heads on a shelf to look at. :-/

/if you push the hat on Idaho Jones it plays the music
//but i still like darth tater and optimash prime better
 
2012-04-27 02:24:17 AM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Ewok Jedi is still less of a pussy than Hayden Christensen


While that may be true, Hayden Christensen has gotten me laid twice (we share a last name). All it takes is convincing some dumb broad we are related.
 
2012-04-27 02:30:06 AM  

zunkus: Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Ewok Jedi is still less of a pussy than Hayden Christensen

While that may be true, Hayden Christensen has gotten me laid twice (we share a last name). All it takes is convincing some dumb broad we are related.


Hmmm.. if I could say I was a cousin of the Thorpedo.. eh, probably not..
 
2012-04-27 02:49:48 AM  

Alphax: zunkus: Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Ewok Jedi is still less of a pussy than Hayden Christensen

While that may be true, Hayden Christensen has gotten me laid twice (we share a last name). All it takes is convincing some dumb broad we are related.

Hmmm.. if I could say I was a cousin of the Thorpedo.. eh, probably not..


Heh.
 
2012-04-27 04:25:35 PM  

born_yesterday: Fano:

Lucas, you're no Herbert


30.media.tumblr.com

Disagrees.
 
2012-04-27 11:11:53 PM  

Skwrl: born_yesterday: Fano:

Lucas, you're no Herbert

[30.media.tumblr.com image 386x415]

Disagrees.


You're gonna look pretty funny tryin' to eat corn on the cob with no farkin' teeth!
 
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