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(Colbert Nation)   If you ever wanted to see Stephen Colbert completely eviscerate a man and feast on his still-steaming entrails, all while wearing a smile, here it is   (colbertnation.com) divider line 182
    More: Amusing, Don McLeroy, Texas State Board of Education  
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10548 clicks; posted to Politics » on 24 Apr 2012 at 12:35 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-24 01:41:19 PM

theorellior: ps69: Because the constitution and tricorner hats.

And tea and taxes and furthermore.


Also maps and like such as.
 
2012-04-24 01:41:28 PM

Trivia Jockey: Urbn: Randomly assigning people to elected positions, like school boards, would be better than the self-selected set of morons that we end up with in our current system.

Instead of the Board determining what goes into textbooks, the textbook companies should just sell whatever danm textbook they want, and if the Board wants to restrict the cirriculum, they just require the teachers to teach only certain parts of the book. Changing the book (which will be sold nationally) because of the whims of a particular state's education board, is astronimically stupid.


It's also astronomically profitable, which is why it's done.
 
2012-04-24 01:41:56 PM

keylock71: Do these morons not realize that Colbert is an comedy act ridiculing their backwards beliefs? I can understand when the show first came on, but it's not like it's a big secret.


Colbert once said that if you come on his show just go with the flow and realize he is playing a character. Some people just don't get that. Barney Frank is a classic example and apparently was pretty ticked off at Colbert.
 
2012-04-24 01:42:48 PM
The Catholic Church doesn't belief that the book of Genesis should be interpreted literally. So people that think that are heretics. Maybe we could let the Catholic Church go after and get medieval on this particular kind of heretic... they'd never expect it.
 
2012-04-24 01:46:01 PM

sprawl15: "After a searching review of the record and applicable caselaw, we find that while ID arguments may be true, a proposition on which the Court takes no position, ID is not science. We find that ID fails on three different levels, any one of which is sufficient to preclude a determination that ID is science. They are: (1) ID violates the centuries-old ground rules of science by invoking and permitting supernatural causation; (2) the argument of irreducible complexity, central to ID, employs the same flawed and illogical contrived dualism that doomed creation science in the 1980s; and (3) ID's negative attacks on evolution have been refuted by the scientific community. ...It is additionally important to note that ID has failed to gain acceptance in the scientific community, it has not generated peer-reviewed publications, nor has it been the subject of testing and research. Expert testimony reveals that since the scientific revolution of the 16th and 17th centuries, science has been limited to the search for natural causes to explain natural phenomena. "
-Kitzmiller v. Dover

Easily one of the more sound asskickings ever issued forth from a judge.


Excellent quote.

Creationists demand that their unprovable speculation and biblical interpretations be given the same status as hard science, but when you take the rigor and experimentation out of science and perform unprovable thought experiments, you've very clearly gone into the realm of metaphysics, and biblical interpretations unquestionably fall under theology.

It's not that anyone is expressly trying to persecute or silence creationists; the problem is that they're trying to teach philosophy in math class. If you want your kids creationism and ID, teach them yourself or take them to church, where such discussions are appropriate.
 
2012-04-24 01:48:26 PM

sprawl15: "After a searching review of the record and applicable caselaw, we find that while ID arguments may be true, a proposition on which the Court takes no position, ID is not science. We find that ID fails on three different levels, any one of which is sufficient to preclude a determination that ID is science. They are: (1) ID violates the centuries-old ground rules of science by invoking and permitting supernatural causation; (2) the argument of irreducible complexity, central to ID, employs the same flawed and illogical contrived dualism that doomed creation science in the 1980s; and (3) ID's negative attacks on evolution have been refuted by the scientific community. ...It is additionally important to note that ID has failed to gain acceptance in the scientific community, it has not generated peer-reviewed publications, nor has it been the subject of testing and research. Expert testimony reveals that since the scientific revolution of the 16th and 17th centuries, science has been limited to the search for natural causes to explain natural phenomena. "
-Kitzmiller v. Dover

Easily one of the more sound asskickings ever issued forth from a judge.


Best part? He was a Bush appointee who was good friends with Tom Ridge.

Pre-trial, the Discovery Institute thought that no matter what BS they pulled, this guy would rule in their favor.

Post-trial, the Discovery Institute reviled him as an activist judge, even though he ruled against them because of the BS they pulled.
 
2012-04-24 01:49:24 PM

Corvus: Because other people will start to believe them. Look at Birtherism and Global Warming Deniers, they both gained a big foothold because they keep repeating their BS unchallenged.


Actually, they are continually challenged, they just keep repeating it louder and more often, usually thanks to Faux News. I cannot recommend The Fox Effect enough to demonstrate this, they talk about Palin's 'Death Panel' lie and how Fox continued to spread it months and months after it had been completely discredited and Palin had won the 'Pants on Fire' Lie of the Year from PolitiFact. Fox didn't care, and they continued to push it and push it, louder and more stridently than their detractors, not letting a silly thing like 'baseless claims' stand in their way.
 
2012-04-24 01:49:36 PM
I'm sure most people won't know what I'm talking about, but I can't help but think about the episode Distant Origin on Voyager where they encounter those lizard people who were ancestors of humans who left Earth millions of years prior and ended up in the Delta Quadrant. There was a scientist who worked with the Voyager crew to prove that their species had almost identical DNA, but the lizard people council wouldn't hear of it as they were perfectly content with their belief that they were created by their God - I think they named him Darwin lol. Anyway, it's a painfully stupid episode, but it runs through my mind every time I see these people spouting their anti-evolution nonsense.

www.startrek.com
 
2012-04-24 01:49:36 PM
http://www.mnn.com/green-tech/research-innovations/stories/why-youre-n ot-as-great-as-you-think-you-are

The guy is either too dumb to know how dumb he is, or mentally ill. I'll go with the latter, since he's a dentist.
 
2012-04-24 01:50:31 PM

saintstryfe: Corvus: Trivia Jockey: Also, after Orly Taitz and this guy, I am getting seriously worried for the dental profession.

For some reason I have noticed many dentist are crazy right wing nut balls. I got one recently who was telling my Obamacare was going to take over the dental industry. It was a real crazy rant and he didn't know I knew all of his stupid talking points.

After calling him out on his points he did the "Well no one knows what's in Obamacare, no one has read it" - He was strill trying this BS after a year it was passed. It's like "Umm it's been about a year I think someone has read it by now".

One funny bit was he said "When the government gets involved a little bit they take over 100%". So I asked him if he needed a license to be a dentists. At first he tried to pretend he didn't need or have a license to be a dentist and I totally called BS and then he just said that was somehow different and changed the topic.

Dentists are more likely to be small business people then most doctors, I guess, so they tend to get a lot more of the bullshat from the small business people who think they're Donald Trump.


Anti-Dentite!
 
2012-04-24 01:52:11 PM

the_ut_tick: Texas fought for its own independence and is the only state to be its own nation.


Hawaii would like a word with you.
 
2012-04-24 01:54:48 PM

3 G's: he had admitted himself into rehab for alcohol and 'scrips. The really screwy thing is that, for whatever reason, as soon as he got out of "treatment", he was allowed to go right back to work.


Well, if he admitted himself into rehab, I don't see why this is an issue. If he had been court ordered after a lawsuit or a criminal complaint, I could understand a delay, but if he admitted himself, the issue hadn't apparently gotten out of hand enough to bring the law into it. How long was he supposed to wait after being 'clean' in rehab? A year? 10? Never works as a dentist again? We have to accept that people can fix their issues at some point, IMHO...

He could have just messed up your teeth because he's a sucky dentist, I'd go somewhere else anyway... :)
 
2012-04-24 01:55:27 PM

turbidum: Mrs. Krabappel: And who can tell me where thunder and lightning come from? Yes, Bart?
Bart: The Leader, ma'am.

Krabappel: Very good, Bart! And who invented Morse Code?
Bart: Oh, I should know this one. . . the. . . the Leader?
Krabappel: Ah, correct again!


Well, technically yes.
 
2012-04-24 01:57:41 PM
That someone like this idiot could be in charge of deciding what goes in textbooks is just a sad commentary on our country.
 
2012-04-24 01:58:24 PM

3 G's: Trivia Jockey: Also, after Orly Taitz and this guy, I am getting seriously worried for the dental profession.

Well, duh, they're always working with Mercury (amalgam) fillings and sodium fluoride products, so of course they're a bit loony.*


I find fault in your hypothesis, as it fails to explain how one can become batshiat nutballs through virtual, internet dentistry.
 
2012-04-24 01:58:52 PM

falkone32: kingoomieiii
Shout it on down from the mountaintops, ARGUMENT FROM PERSON INCREDULITY

Resulting, in part, from some apparent misconceptions he has. Calling evolution "unguided" doesn't make sense in context, when it is "guided" by selection processes.


It's funny that evolution is conceptually offensive - because it's an "unguided process" - to people who predominantly support the "invisible hand" of the free market.
 
2012-04-24 02:00:28 PM

3 G's: Trivia Jockey: Also, after Orly Taitz and this guy, I am getting seriously worried for the dental profession.

Well, duh, they're always working with Mercury (amalgam) fillings and sodium fluoride products, so of course they're a bit loony.*


* Partly kidding.


I think you may be on to something here. Maybe we need to update the old phrase: "Mad as a hatter'....
 
2012-04-24 02:01:16 PM
holy shiat, this guy is an utter buffoon.
 
2012-04-24 02:08:27 PM

AbbeySomeone: Marcus Aurelius: If America knew back in 1848 how the Southwest would turn out, I'd hope they'd have let Mexico keep it.

California too; oh wait, they still run that state.


Yeah, just look at all those Hispanics in positions of power and authori...ty...

/careful with all that herp
//ya just might derp!
 
2012-04-24 02:12:35 PM

sweetmelissa31: I'm glad that text book standards get changed based on the fact that some guy doesn't understand cells.


but they are like complicated and stuff therefore god did it, QED
 
2012-04-24 02:13:53 PM

theknuckler_33: The "behemoth" and the "leviathan" are dinosaurs.



Also my left and right testicles, respectively
 
2012-04-24 02:15:41 PM

Jackson Herring: but they are like complicated and stuff therefore god did it, QED


IF YOU FIND A WATCH THERE'S GOTTA BE A WATCHMAKER.
 
2012-04-24 02:17:41 PM

quatchi: So half of Americas textbooks come from California and the other half come from Texas and are double checked for truthiness by that dipshiat?

Charming.

That noted, funny interview. Particularly liked the way Colbert's "evolving Devil lying about evolution" thing flew right over the guys head while the audience totally got it on the DL.


Actually, it's mostly all Texas. California is a large state, yes, but it does not have a statewide school system like Texas. There are municipal school systems across the state. The reason Texas gets to decide what's included in textbooks nationwide is that their statewide standards give them the leverage of bulk pricing. They order so damn many books that it's not feasible for a textbook publisher to put out a gazillion books to the TX standard an also another gazillion with a gazillion different standards.
 
2012-04-24 02:24:29 PM

theorellior: Jackson Herring: but they are like complicated and stuff therefore god did it, QED

IF YOU FIND A WATCH THERE'S GOTTA BE A WATCHMAKER.


How many VEB units is a pocket watch?
 
2012-04-24 02:25:02 PM

Jackson Herring: Also my left and right testicles, respectively


I thought they were called Torg and Ron Paul, respectively.
 
2012-04-24 02:26:00 PM

sweetmelissa31: Jackson Herring: Also my left and right testicles, respectively

I thought they were called Torg and Ron Paul, respectively.


wait does that mean.... matching set???
 
2012-04-24 02:27:45 PM

keylock71: Do these morons not realize that Colbert is an comedy act ridiculing their backwards beliefs? I can understand when the show first came on, but it's not like it's a big secret.

That this man was once in charge of deciding what goes into text books in this country is pathetic.


For two reasons:
1) Many Conservatives are deluded enough to think that Colbert is supporting them
2) They follow the idea that "any publicity is good publicity" which is patently untrue in many fields especially when they are competitive (including politics) but true in others that just relies on attention (such as the movie business). He is smart if he is there for the latter, or stupid if for the former.
 
2012-04-24 02:28:24 PM

Jackson Herring: wait does that mean.... matching set???


I don't want to talk about my testicles on the internet.
 
2012-04-24 02:32:16 PM

Jackson Herring: theknuckler_33: The "behemoth" and the "leviathan" are dinosaurs.


Also my left and right testicles, respectively


I named mine Statler and Waldorf.
 
2012-04-24 02:35:07 PM

Bloody William: Jackson Herring: theknuckler_33: The "behemoth" and the "leviathan" are dinosaurs.


Also my left and right testicles, respectively

I named mine Statler and Waldorf.


Imagine them heckling you while you are "doing" "it"

"Hey, that's not half bad!"
"It's not half good either!"
 
2012-04-24 02:35:43 PM

abb3w: While McLeroy was chased out in the last election cycle, the Silly Party grade conservatives still held 6 of 13 seats, and the Very Silly Party people haven't given up hope. Due to redistricting, all 15 seats are up for re-election this year.

Incidentally, one of the Sensible Party faction candidates is Judy Jennings, the mom of farker Nobodyn0se. Not sure if he's active on Fark these days, or doing more productive things with his time.

TFN tends to have decent coverage of the TX SBOE antics.


I lurk. The trolling has gotten so out of hand, I can't invest in threads anymore.

But yes, my mother is running again, as is Rebecca Bell-Metereau. If you live in either of their districts (5 or 10), I highly recommend supporting them with your money and your vote to keep psychos like Don Mcelroy far away from the education system of this nation's children.
 
2012-04-24 02:46:46 PM

dramboxf: So, if men and dinosaurs shared the Earth, howcum there is no mention of them at all in the bible? Seriously?


Many a Christian will point you to Job 40:15-24 as a mention of dinosaurs.

15 Behold now behemoth, which I made with thee; he eateth grass as an ox.
16 Lo now, his strength [is] in his loins, and his force [is] in the navel of his belly.
17 He moveth his tail like a cedar: the sinews of his stones are wrapped together.
18 His bones [are as] strong pieces of brass; his bones [are] like bars of iron.
19 He [is] the chief of the ways of God: he that made him can make his
sword to approach [unto him].
20 Surely the mountains bring him forth food, where all the beasts of the field play.
21 He lieth under the shady trees, in the covert of the reed, and fens.
22 The shady trees cover him [with] their shadow; the willows of the brook
compass him about.
23 Behold, he drinketh up a river, [and] hasteth not: he trusteth that he
can draw up Jordan into his mouth.
24 He taketh it with his eyes: [his] nose pierceth through snares.
 
2012-04-24 02:47:04 PM

Jackson Herring: Bloody William: Jackson Herring: theknuckler_33: The "behemoth" and the "leviathan" are dinosaurs.


Also my left and right testicles, respectively

I named mine Statler and Waldorf.

Imagine them heckling you while you are "doing" "it"

"Hey, that's not half bad!"
"It's not half good either!"


My o-face involves me going "Ohohohohoho!"
 
2012-04-24 02:47:47 PM

unyon: clip 3 of 4, for Canadian farkers


Thanks. Bookmarked for later.
 
2012-04-24 02:50:14 PM

stevetherobot: Many a Christian will point you to Job 40:15-24 as a mention of dinosaurs.


The Bible has more interpretations than a remedial English Lit class.
 
2012-04-24 02:53:51 PM

Bloody William: Jackson Herring: theknuckler_33: The "behemoth" and the "leviathan" are dinosaurs.


Also my left and right testicles, respectively

I named mine Statler and Waldorf.


"That was a medium blowjob."
"A medium blowjob?"
"Yep, it wasn't rare, and it certainly wasn't well done!"

*D'OH, HOHOHOHO*
 
2012-04-24 02:55:47 PM

quatchi: So half of Americas textbooks come from California and the other half come from Texas and are double checked for truthiness by that dipshiat?

Charming.

That noted, funny interview. Particularly liked the way Colbert's "evolving Devil lying about evolution" thing flew right over the guys head while the audience totally got it on the DL.


Probably already been explained, but it's not quite that simple. Every state can set guidelines for what materials for classrooms may contain, but the only two states that really actively police their textbooks are Texas and California. They don't rewrite/demand rewrites usually, they just look through the whole catalog of textbooks and approve only those that they feel teach their students what they need to be taught, with (relatively) minor editorial requests if there are only a few points of contention. To oversimplify, Texas can be counted on to push for more American exceptionalism and focus on Christianity's role in the colonies and early American history, whereas California is usually pushing for diversity of people represented and morality stories to be inserted into the narrative.

In other words, if you want to actually make a usable pre-college level text book you have to write in very black and white moral terms, push the "American creation myth" that sweeps the flaws of every politician from before the Baby Boomers under the rug, and contains constant inserts about Dolly Madison, Sacagawea, and George Washington Carver that end up having no effect on the overall story the books tell. They have to make these terrible lifeless and downright deceptive history textbooks, or else you've got about a fifth of the country who won't even consider letting their children use the book.
 
2012-04-24 02:58:41 PM

stevetherobot: and his force [is] in the navel of his belly


Clearly this is not refering to a dinosaur, reptiles don't have belly buttons.
 
2012-04-24 03:06:14 PM

theorellior: Jackson Herring: but they are like complicated and stuff therefore god did it, QED

IF YOU FIND A WATCH THERE'S GOTTA BE A WATCHMAKER.


*cough*
 
2012-04-24 03:15:55 PM

Urbn: Randomly assigning people to elected positions, like school boards, would be better than the self-selected set of morons that we end up with in our current system.

/Seriously
//Science Friday podcasts FTW!


This. We should invert our legislative/judicial framework. No more jury duty -- you do have to spend two years as a city councilman/school board member. Juries are replaced by judicial panels -- two judges, one non-lawyer who asks to be appointed and two random schmoes. Oh, and summary execution for full-time govt employees caught in any kind of graft or corruption.
 
2012-04-24 03:21:19 PM

propasaurus: Actually, it's mostly all Texas. California is a large state, yes, but it does not have a statewide school system like Texas. There are municipal school systems across the state. The reason Texas gets to decide what's included in textbooks nationwide is that their statewide standards give them the leverage of bulk pricing. They order so damn many books that it's not feasible for a textbook publisher to put out a gazillion books to the TX standard an also another gazillion with a gazillion different standards.



Um, we have state standards in California. It fact, the students in my district are being tested on their retention of said standards RIGHT NOW. STAR tests are this week and very few teachers seem to be prepared for it, even though they absolutely knew it was coming (just like every year). Slowest substitute days of the year were last week and this week as teachers cram like high school students to force the more difficult academic patterns to last just a few more days as if they were temporary tattoos for your brain.
 
2012-04-24 03:24:41 PM

Trivia Jockey: Also, after Orly Taitz and this guy, I am getting seriously worried for the dental profession.


Just thinking about having to sit in a dentist chair listening to these people talk about uneven type on a birth certificate or how god is the answer to every farking thing without the ability to form a cogent response makes me want to do my own dentistry with a hammer and chisel
 
2012-04-24 03:46:21 PM

Nobodyn0se: abb3w: While McLeroy was chased out in the last election cycle, the Silly Party grade conservatives still held 6 of 13 seats, and the Very Silly Party people haven't given up hope. Due to redistricting, all 15 seats are up for re-election this year.

Incidentally, one of the Sensible Party faction candidates is Judy Jennings, the mom of farker Nobodyn0se. Not sure if he's active on Fark these days, or doing more productive things with his time.

TFN tends to have decent coverage of the TX SBOE antics.

I lurk. The trolling has gotten so out of hand, I can't invest in threads anymore.

But yes, my mother is running again, as is Rebecca Bell-Metereau. If you live in either of their districts (5 or 10), I highly recommend supporting them with your money and your vote to keep psychos like Don Mcelroy far away from the education system of this nation's children.


If I'm reading the new map right, we're in 10. Consider it done, and thanks for the heads up!
 
2012-04-24 03:51:59 PM

Fat Old Broad: Nobodyn0se: abb3w: While McLeroy was chased out in the last election cycle, the Silly Party grade conservatives still held 6 of 13 seats, and the Very Silly Party people haven't given up hope. Due to redistricting, all 15 seats are up for re-election this year.

Incidentally, one of the Sensible Party faction candidates is Judy Jennings, the mom of farker Nobodyn0se. Not sure if he's active on Fark these days, or doing more productive things with his time.

TFN tends to have decent coverage of the TX SBOE antics.

I lurk. The trolling has gotten so out of hand, I can't invest in threads anymore.

But yes, my mother is running again, as is Rebecca Bell-Metereau. If you live in either of their districts (5 or 10), I highly recommend supporting them with your money and your vote to keep psychos like Don Mcelroy far away from the education system of this nation's children.

If I'm reading the new map right, we're in 10. Consider it done, and thanks for the heads up!


Awesome, thanks for your support!

Can you post the map? Some other people might not know what district they live in.
 
2012-04-24 04:02:24 PM
I have friends that believe jesus rode on dinosaurs. Its quite scary
 
2012-04-24 04:04:53 PM

eagles95: I have friends that believe jesus rode on dinosaurs. Its quite scary


No you don't.
 
2012-04-24 04:09:19 PM
http://www.tea.state.tx.us/index3.aspx?id=1156

Link goes to Texas Education Agency page. Links to maps are there.

On my phone, so apologies if this doesn't post properly.
 
2012-04-24 04:18:30 PM

the_freelance: Urbn: Randomly assigning people to elected positions, like school boards, would be better than the self-selected set of morons that we end up with in our current system.

/Seriously
//Science Friday podcasts FTW!

This. We should invert our legislative/judicial framework. No more jury duty -- you do have to spend two years as a city councilman/school board member. Juries are replaced by judicial panels -- two judges, one non-lawyer who asks to be appointed and two random schmoes. Oh, and summary execution for full-time govt employees caught in any kind of graft or corruption.


I really kinda like this idea in general. Especially, for local communities, this seems like it could foster people being more active and informed about issues affecting their local community.
 
2012-04-24 04:21:02 PM

BojanglesPaladin: eagles95: I have friends that believe jesus rode on dinosaurs. Its quite scary

No you don't.


They believe that man (while jesus was on earth) interacted with dinosaurs. They have books for their sons explaining how this is possible and books to explain it to adults.
 
2012-04-24 04:27:54 PM

eagles95: They believe that man (while jesus was on earth) interacted with dinosaurs. They have books for their sons explaining how this is possible and books to explain it to adults.


I still don't believe you. Cites please.

I know that some creationists believe that man and dinasurs co-habotated, but not during Jesus' lifetime.
 
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