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(Click Orlando)   The funniest and worst "Glamour shots" you'll ever see   (clickorlando.com) divider line 401
    More: Fail, glamour  
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39223 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Apr 2012 at 10:06 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-24 03:46:52 PM
www.seinfeld-fan.net
 
2012-04-24 03:49:18 PM

StaceyNC: [www.seinfeld-fan.net image 410x274]


He transcends time... It's horrifying...and yet...I can't look away...
 
2012-04-24 03:51:54 PM

Krymson Tyde: snip


Keeper of the gems I am. With these shoulder pads I have the strength to destroy villages, homes, and crops.
 
2012-04-24 04:00:12 PM

kiwimoogle84:

Just...why...


HOLY HELL!! That website is full of lulz...

i881.photobucket.comi881.photobucket.comi881.photobucket.comi881.photobucket.com


Too large for Fark (sfw)
 
2012-04-24 04:03:25 PM

alwaysjaded: kiwimoogle84:

Just...why...

HOLY HELL!! That website is full of lulz...

[i881.photobucket.com image 403x604][i881.photobucket.com image 560x456][i881.photobucket.com image 438x604][i881.photobucket.com image 323x604]


Too large for Fark (sfw)


You've never played on awkward family photos??? Go deep. It's BAD.
 
2012-04-24 04:04:36 PM

digitalrain: Andrew Wiggin: Balchinian: [i.imgur.com image 388x520]

Yo Dawg, we heard you like afros...

i loved watching him paint.

LOL...I thought that too. Either it was the "happy accident" painter guy...or Leo Sayer.


Bob Ross RIP loved that dude, actually still watch him on PBS. there was an interesting documentary on about him not too long ago. He hated his afro, i was surprised by that LOL
 
2012-04-24 04:12:49 PM
Please don't take this as a knock. Her video for "Losing You" is amazing.
cataclips.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-04-24 04:17:44 PM

alwaysjaded: Andrew Wiggin:

you sound like a nickelback fan.

That reminds me. Last night I found the most offensive photo on the internet.

[i881.photobucket.com image 500x494]


I LIKE it! Bawahahahaha
 
2012-04-24 04:20:01 PM

Krymson Tyde: [i232.photobucket.com image 240x301]


That little girl looks EXACTLY like my sister did in 1980.. HOLY shiat!
 
2012-04-24 04:22:32 PM
"Last time these biatches laugh at me for being bald."

i881.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-24 04:28:10 PM

ZMugg: Krymson Tyde:

[i232.photobucket.com image 450x520]

Mrs. Doubtfire; The Early Years.


I was thinking more of this.. scroll down half a mouse wheel..
Link
 
2012-04-24 04:41:06 PM
i232.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-24 04:41:49 PM

kiwimoogle84: alwaysjaded: kiwimoogle84:

Just...why...

HOLY HELL!! That website is full of lulz...

You've never played on awkward family photos??? Go deep. It's BAD.


Here's another good site for bad photos:
Sexy People (SFW, despite the name)
 
2012-04-24 04:46:29 PM

AmberDempsey: kiwimoogle84: alwaysjaded: kiwimoogle84:

Just...why...

HOLY HELL!! That website is full of lulz...

You've never played on awkward family photos??? Go deep. It's BAD.

Here's another good site for bad photos:
Sexy People (SFW, despite the name)


That is EXCELLENT.

I need to find a picture of my dad circa 1978. He had a biatchin' porn 'stache.
 
2012-04-24 04:47:43 PM
"We have such sights to show you. "

rocketdock.com

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-04-24 04:56:36 PM

LordSunder: This one is "fake"

[www.maggiejeans.com image 400x595]

As in fake that she's (the subject) is a professional photographer who takes these self portrait pictures as art. I wish I could rememebr her name , but one of her pieces sold for over a million bucks.


That's Cindy Sherman. She has an incredible exhibit at MoMA right now.
 
2012-04-24 04:57:39 PM
"How's it goin'? I just clipped a car battery to my testicles!"

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-04-24 04:58:43 PM

kiwimoogle84: alwaysjaded: SearchN:

Aww. I ever tell you where I worked?

/Nice not having a job at the moment. Five and a half years without a vacation.

Think so. Something involving shoes, I believe. Or it was your fetish. Can't remember. Remind me.

And I hear ya on the not working. I was working 7 days a week, 12-14 hours a day for 6 months in different states and the only downtime I had was jetting to airports. I've been off for a week now and I'm taking the month off. We need a boobies thread. :)

My google-fu must be weak today. This is the only thing I could find that hasn't been posted already and I couldn't find that photo I was talking about.

[i881.photobucket.com image 450x562]

In a related vein...

[farm8.staticflickr.com image 413x500]

Just...why...


Oh shiat, I think that's my uncle and his girlfriend when he went through his Elvis phase in the mid-90's and i'm not joking.
 
2012-04-24 04:58:52 PM

Mugato: "We have such sights to show you. "


Yes, no, yes with booze, yes, yes
 
2012-04-24 05:03:24 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Mugato: "We have such sights to show you. "

Yes, no, yes with booze, yes, yes


Ahhh, I see we have similar tastes when it comes to our women.
 
2012-04-24 05:05:47 PM

walrusonion: kiwimoogle84: alwaysjaded: SearchN:

Aww. I ever tell you where I worked?

/Nice not having a job at the moment. Five and a half years without a vacation.

Think so. Something involving shoes, I believe. Or it was your fetish. Can't remember. Remind me.

And I hear ya on the not working. I was working 7 days a week, 12-14 hours a day for 6 months in different states and the only downtime I had was jetting to airports. I've been off for a week now and I'm taking the month off. We need a boobies thread. :)

My google-fu must be weak today. This is the only thing I could find that hasn't been posted already and I couldn't find that photo I was talking about.

[i881.photobucket.com image 450x562]

In a related vein...

[farm8.staticflickr.com image 413x500]

Just...why...

Oh shiat, I think that's my uncle and his girlfriend when he went through his Elvis phase in the mid-90's and i'm not joking.


You must be proud.
 
2012-04-24 05:06:02 PM

walrusonion: kiwimoogle84: alwaysjaded: SearchN:

Aww. I ever tell you where I worked?

/Nice not having a job at the moment. Five and a half years without a vacation.

Think so. Something involving shoes, I believe. Or it was your fetish. Can't remember. Remind me.

And I hear ya on the not working. I was working 7 days a week, 12-14 hours a day for 6 months in different states and the only downtime I had was jetting to airports. I've been off for a week now and I'm taking the month off. We need a boobies thread. :)

My google-fu must be weak today. This is the only thing I could find that hasn't been posted already and I couldn't find that photo I was talking about.

[i881.photobucket.com image 450x562]

In a related vein...

[farm8.staticflickr.com image 413x500]

Just...why...

Oh shiat, I think that's my uncle and his girlfriend when he went through his Elvis phase in the mid-90's and i'm not joking.


Are you serious?!? Yanked that off GIS for awkward family photos. Heh.
 
2012-04-24 05:48:00 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com

don, maybe
dawn, i don't think so
 
2012-04-24 05:49:12 PM
My sister died at an untimely age. So it fell to us, her siblings, to go through her apartment to see whether she had left any instructions on how to distribute her various worldly possessions. We spent a long time in her "office," where she didn't have so much a filing system as a stuffing system. We also pulled out all the drawers in the kitchen and the cabinetry in her living room. Spent several hours going through various folders and envelopes.

Then I decided to tackle the bedroom and the walk-in closet. Oh, Lord, the bedroom!

I reached around the doorframe and flipped the light switch, then walked through the door and headed straight for the closet. My sister (the one who was still alive, not the one who passed on) said something I didn't catch, and I turned around to ask her to repeat herself. That's when I saw it.

An oil painting. Golden-rectangle shaped, of course, and at least 4 feet high, maybe more. A very well-painted work of art, it was the very image of my dear departed sister...

...wearing only the very suit of clothes the good Lord done give her on her birthday.

She wasn't half bad. For a sister, I mean. Jus' sayin'.

The sibs and I looked at it for a while, then someone asked, "What are we going to do with that?" None of us were particularly eager to hang it in our living rooms. We briefly discussed giving it to Mom and Dad, that got some laughs. Finally decided to give it to the artist who actually painted it. Maybe she could use it as a portfolio piece, or maybe she could paint someone else's face on it. Or a dang swimsuit or something, yo.
 
2012-04-24 06:14:53 PM
sorry guys, I've worked at several copying shops, and while these are truly horrifying to behold, the ones that stay in my memory are the ones that we weren't allowed to scan/copy/reproduce due to copyright violation. And THANK GOD FOR THAT!! The woman who was losing most of her hair, and leaning forward suggestively. The woman with 3 teeth left. Smiling. In lingere. Most of you don't know the horrors that have been visited upon the copy-guy behind the counter.

/on the plus side, I've seen things from women on the other side of the scale you wouldn't believe. :)
 
2012-04-24 06:23:16 PM

Andrew Wiggin: MacWizard: Andrew Wiggin: swahnhennessy: I'd like to take this moment to assure our younger Farkers that their they're there were attractive women in the 80's, despite what the link may seem to prove.

ftfy

/sorry, pet peeve

ftfy, since it's your pet peeve and all.

[i1.kym-cdn.com image 413x384]


Oh really?

/pet peave
 
2012-04-24 06:26:47 PM

Andrew Wiggin: [26.media.tumblr.com image 419x700]

the one on the left looks like a certain attention whore farkette.


littlett's?
 
2012-04-24 06:28:18 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 335x442]

don, maybe
dawn, i don't think so


Gawd. My HS picture looks a lot like that, with the big 80's hair (and this was 1991) and the stupid little velvet top. I have not saved any copies. I think my mother has.
 
2012-04-24 06:32:24 PM
Back in the late 70s when I was still in college, the guy that I use to party with all the time worked for a garbage pick up company that picked up the garbage from Lincolnshire, Illinois. Frank use to root through the garbage and bring home some good things on occasion as Lincolnshire was full of rich Jews. Their garbage was other people's treasures. One time he ran across 4 or 5 boxes of color slides that were amateur shots of the guy's wife in all kinds of sexual poses and some shots of him doing her, her blowing him... She was hot as hell too! It was like striking the mother load.
There's something about seeing those kinds of pictures knowing it's someone who lives 5 minutes away and was sort of the "girl next door."
We got tired of holding the slides up to a light and borrowed a slide projector from someone.
 
2012-04-24 06:35:00 PM
#23 and #25 were bangable...
 
2012-04-24 06:36:30 PM

Sofa King Smart: Andrew Wiggin: [26.media.tumblr.com image 419x700]

the one on the left looks like a certain attention whore farkette.

littlett's?


Bingo
 
2012-04-24 07:00:13 PM

Sybarite:

Oh great, I'd just gotten done looking at terrible glamor shots, and now you've got me looking at awful family portraits. Fine, I guess I just won't get anything done today.

[www.teamjimmyjoe.com image 600x708]


LOL! Thank god I left to do some work, or else I'd be spending all day checking those out - I haven't been to Awkward Family Photos in awhile.

This is epic:

i42.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-24 07:01:21 PM
cdn.smosh.com

/ this one is a semi-celebrity.
 
2012-04-24 07:01:44 PM

thecpt: CrispFlows: [yeeeah.com image 530x368]

WTF.

/kindof looks like Jared Leto


That is Jared Leto. WTH?!
 
2012-04-24 07:02:15 PM
This thread will teach me to read Fark in a boring meeting. I swear it was all I could do to keep from laughing, and maintain my cool. I would hate to have to explain 'Glamore Shots' to my boss.
 
2012-04-24 07:34:33 PM
www.maggiejeans.com3.bp.blogspot.com
"Oranges shmoranges, who cares?"
 
2012-04-24 07:51:59 PM

Mugato: "How's it goin'? I just clipped a car battery to my testicles!"

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x689]


i.imgur.com
 
2012-04-24 07:56:49 PM

Lionel Mandrake: CrispFlows: Holy HELL?!

[cdn2.mamapop.com image 396x511]

No shiat. These kids don't even look real.

[files.myopera.com image 494x640]


2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-04-24 08:04:17 PM
i42.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-24 08:15:45 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 335x442]

don, maybe most likely
dawn, i don't think so

 
2012-04-24 09:17:35 PM
weknowmemes.com
 
2012-04-25 01:41:11 AM

CrispFlows: [cdn.smosh.com image 500x474]

/ this one is a semi-celebrity.


okay, I just can't place him-- who is this?
 
2012-04-25 01:43:02 AM

The Whore Of Mensa: CrispFlows: [cdn.smosh.com image 500x474]

/ this one is a semi-celebrity.

okay, I just can't place him-- who is this?


Adrien Grenner.
 
2012-04-25 02:00:10 AM
bleeech! hrrrrr... bgggghhhh plehhhh.

Gimme a second, I can feel a second round coming on.
 
2012-04-25 02:43:33 AM

The Whore Of Mensa: CrispFlows: [cdn.smosh.com image 500x474]

/ this one is a semi-celebrity.

okay, I just can't place him-- who is this?


www.autographdealer.com

Adrien Grenier
 
2012-04-25 12:12:38 PM

kiwimoogle84: Trixie212: I'm laughing because I've had a Glamour Shot in my Fark profile for years. I take notoriously bad pictures and I wanted one picture where I looked halfway decent for my kids.

/so there

That's one of the few good ones I've seen, FYI. You look good :)


Yeah, I'll second that.
That is such a good shot, the only thing that hints of glamour shots is the hand up by the face.
What is that hand doing anyway?
 
2012-04-25 12:21:45 PM

Lionel Mandrake: CrispFlows: Holy HELL?!

[cdn2.mamapop.com image 396x511]

No shiat. These kids don't even look real.

[files.myopera.com image 494x640]


They photoshop any imperfections out. You can see "before" and "afters" some places on the net.
 
2012-04-25 12:53:54 PM

kiwimoogle84: The Whore Of Mensa: CrispFlows: [cdn.smosh.com image 500x474]

/ this one is a semi-celebrity.

okay, I just can't place him-- who is this?

Adrien Grenner.


thank you-- to both people who posted it-- that was driving me crazy.
 
2012-04-25 01:27:36 PM

spentmiles: Oh wow, people hating on Glamour Shots... Back in the early 1980s, I bought a franchise and opened a store at a mall in Richland Hills, just outside of Dallas. I was in my early twenties, but I'd been taking photographs my entire life. For all the people that hate on it, you have to understand just how farking hideous these people are when they walk into the store. Typically, it's a middle aged woman whose trying to take a "sexy" shot for her boyfriend, but not so sexy that it will get confiscated by the prison guards who monitor the mall. So it's my job to make this humongous, flabby white woman look good enough for Paco to jack to while he's doing a five year minimum for the statutory rape of the woman's daughter. Hey, I consider myself an artist, up to any challenge, but you have to understand -- the Sistine Chapel was already pretty damn beautiful before Michelangelo started on it.

Forget the size of them, these woman were so ugly that I'd wake up at night, screaming, covered in sweat, and punching myself in my own cock. I had to basically build them a new head using clown make-up, hairspray, and Satanic prayer. I'll probably go to hell for it. The only way I could tell if I'd done a reasonable job is to have the woman look in the mirror to see if it'd shatter. I was unable to masturbate to orgasm my entire tenure there.

So please, do not hate Glamour Shots itself. It was a reasonable idea that preyed on people's vanity. I closed shop, though, when this particularly hideous walrus took off her robe and asked for some tasteful nudes. Her nipples... my God... her nipples...


/favorited
 
2012-04-25 06:40:59 PM

John_David_Stutts: wambu: cig-mkr: Before
[images.wildammo.com image 397x447]
After
[www.clickorlando.com image 285x360]

I don't even want to know how you have both photos . . .

I dare you to GIS the name Hotbox101...go ahead, we'll wait

/let me know how those dry heaves are treatin' ya


I've seen as bad in real life. I live near a beach, but it's the beach where the old, fat and ugly chicks go to avoid being ion the sand next to some hottie, so yeah.

I see she has a huge number of pictures on NewbieNudes. OMG is she fugly, but you have to believe she has no shame.
 
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