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(Click Orlando)   The funniest and worst "Glamour shots" you'll ever see   (clickorlando.com) divider line 391
    More: Fail, glamour  
•       •       •

39294 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Apr 2012 at 10:06 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



391 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-04-24 11:27:16 AM  
Needs golum and or squirrel photoshop stat.
 
2012-04-24 11:27:44 AM  
i238.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-24 11:28:01 AM  
There isn't much you can do with poses when the subject is hideous. Seriously, ugly people should not be photographed. Being a model is a privilege, not a right.
 
2012-04-24 11:28:15 AM  

Andrew Wiggin: this needs a caption


My name is Dar. Behind me is Podo. You should see her twin.
 
2012-04-24 11:28:45 AM  

Andrew Wiggin:


I may have that blown up and placed on my wall. That is art, friends.
 
2012-04-24 11:29:21 AM  
t2.gstatic.com
She'll have the peanut butter sandwich.



Also, bite down on this antenna lead. I need to watch the hockey game on channel 12.
 
2012-04-24 11:29:21 AM  

Queensowntalia: hillary: We're not making fun of them because they are over 40 and/or ugly, as many of them are clearly neither. We're making fun of them because they are idiots who thought looking goofy aznd paying for it was a good idea.

You could not have really been so stupid as yo not see that, so, again, stop being a coont.

Nah, it's a mix of people making fun of the shots and commenting on how fat and ugly the women are. It's not all one way or the other.

But you're probably right that I"m being a little butthurt.

/tired and cranky. Coffee not working.


My take on it is that for the most part what we are making fun of is our collective selves. Hindsight is 20/20, and looking back at the fad that was the glamour shot reveals just how short-sighted and myopic we can be as humans. That is really ultimately what is so funny about these shots. If you look at the subjects, they are all sorts of different people...old, young, fat, thin, male, female...and we are laughing at them all. Not because glamour is outside the realm of possibility for them, but because glamour is not something which can not be attained simply by dressing up and using a soft focus filter, yet we still fell for the trend hook, line, and sinker.

I don't think you are being butthurt. Overly-sensitive perhaps, but there may be good reasons for that to be the case. Anyway, that's my 2 cents.
 
2012-04-24 11:31:40 AM  

CrispFlows: [i238.photobucket.com image 610x458]


DAWWWWWWWW!
 
2012-04-24 11:33:30 AM  

bluehubcap: Balchinian: Krymson Tyde: [i232.photobucket.com image 300x450]

I am now thinking about the sound two pieces of styrofoam make when you rub them together.

I always wonder how two people like that have sex. Unless he has a super long manbit, I just can't wrap my head around the physics.

Or the reason.



I try not to think about it.

You aren't helping. :P
 
2012-04-24 11:34:06 AM  
www.maggiejeans.com

There are no words.
 
2012-04-24 11:35:08 AM  
The good news is that the majority of these flesh boulders are probably long dead from heart disease, or at least rendered unable to venture into public due to their 'beetus amputations.
 
2012-04-24 11:35:39 AM  

Rich Cream: [www.clickorlando.com image 294x360]

I need an explanation for this inclusion.


Boy George was everywhere during the 80s.
 
2012-04-24 11:37:02 AM  

Matthew Keene: There are no words.


Make-up and hair need to be taken out and beaten to death with a kabuki brush.
 
2012-04-24 11:38:32 AM  

Tsar_Bomba1: Everybody just back off! I'll do it... I swear!!!

[www.clickorlando.com image 264x360]


I'm sure that Fark's resident gun nuts are furiously jacking it to that pic right now.
 
2012-04-24 11:39:31 AM  

Matthew Keene: [www.maggiejeans.com image 400x595]

There are no words.


It's like Raggedy Ann come to life.
 
2012-04-24 11:41:01 AM  

bluehubcap: Matthew Keene: [www.maggiejeans.com image 400x595]

There are no words.

It's like Raggedy Ann come to life.


Back from the dead, you mean? After dying in a tire fire?
 
2012-04-24 11:41:47 AM  

Andrew Wiggin: nsfw


How did this seem like a good idea to this woman? Guys, guys will go along with anything if it means they get to cop a feel. But the woman? She must have been on a high dose of mood altering drugs.
 
2012-04-24 11:42:11 AM  
What's the prep time on some of these??!!
ts4.mm.bing.net

ts1.mm.bing.net

ts3.mm.bing.net

ts1.mm.bing.net
 
2012-04-24 11:44:04 AM  

CrispFlows: Holy HELL?!


You owe me a keyboard! Scalding coffee right out the nose.
 
2012-04-24 11:46:08 AM  
Had Glamour Shot taken for Richard Gere.

cuteoverload.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-04-24 11:48:38 AM  
i39.tinypic.com
 
2012-04-24 11:48:41 AM  

Matthew Keene: Had Glamour Shot taken for Richard Gere.

[cuteoverload.files.wordpress.com image 500x446]


why is it brown?
 
2012-04-24 11:48:54 AM  
This one is "fake"

www.maggiejeans.com

As in fake that she's (the subject) is a professional photographer who takes these self portrait pictures as art. I wish I could rememebr her name , but one of her pieces sold for over a million bucks.
 
2012-04-24 11:49:31 AM  

CrispFlows: Holy HELL?!

[cdn2.mamapop.com image 396x511]


No shiat. These kids don't even look real.

files.myopera.com
 
2012-04-24 11:50:16 AM  

Mugato: "When I watch porn, I cum when the guy delievers the pizza."

[i.imgur.com image 223x397]


I came into this thread knowing that coffee would exit my nose. I didn't know that it would exit my eye socket as well. Ever "smell" coffee with your eye? That is my current situation. Thank you. Would you be offended if I edited that photo with your caption and used it later for further laughs?
 
2012-04-24 11:51:34 AM  

Andrew Wiggin: [i39.tinypic.com image 500x599]


This shiat just keeps getting worse and worse!
 
2012-04-24 11:52:07 AM  

spentmiles: Oh wow, people hating on Glamour Shots... Back in the early 1980s, I bought a franchise and opened a store at a mall in Richland Hills, just outside of Dallas. I was in my early twenties, but I'd been taking photographs my entire life. For all the people that hate on it, you have to understand just how farking hideous these people are when they walk into the store. Typically, it's a middle aged woman whose trying to take a "sexy" shot for her boyfriend, but not so sexy that it will get confiscated by the prison guards who monitor the mall. So it's my job to make this humongous, flabby white woman look good enough for Paco to jack to while he's doing a five year minimum for the statutory rape of the woman's daughter. Hey, I consider myself an artist, up to any challenge, but you have to understand -- the Sistine Chapel was already pretty damn beautiful before Michelangelo started on it.

Forget the size of them, these woman were so ugly that I'd wake up at night, screaming, covered in sweat, and punching myself in my own cock. I had to basically build them a new head using clown make-up, hairspray, and Satanic prayer. I'll probably go to hell for it. The only way I could tell if I'd done a reasonable job is to have the woman look in the mirror to see if it'd shatter. I was unable to masturbate to orgasm my entire tenure there.

So please, do not hate Glamour Shots itself. It was a reasonable idea that preyed on people's vanity. I closed shop, though, when this particularly hideous walrus took off her robe and asked for some tasteful nudes. Her nipples... my God... her nipples...


You got added to my favorites list. That. . . was beautiful.
Awesome if you made it up, even better if it's true.
 
2012-04-24 11:53:24 AM  
www.justsaypictures.com
 
2012-04-24 11:53:48 AM  
ts4.mm.bing.net

My hair is a bird. Your argument is invalid.
 
2012-04-24 11:54:21 AM  
You know what, I think glamour shots should come back and do novelty type shots. They could do the exact same thing now that they did back then, but market it in a way that today's youth would use it in jest and laugh at how ridicules it is. Just like those vengeance dad type of set ups, I have a buddy who is a photographer and we are working on some ideas. I might do one with this creepy "peek a boo" doll I got at a thrift store, that will be pretty epic.
 
2012-04-24 11:54:33 AM  

Mad Scientist: [www.justsaypictures.com image 640x634]


Meat Loaf really let himself go.
 
2012-04-24 11:58:21 AM  
www.forkparty.com
 
2012-04-24 11:58:39 AM  
Those hollow-eyed little girls remind me of these dolls:

i644.photobucket.com

Had one when I was a little girl
 
2012-04-24 12:01:26 PM  
We laugh at Glamour Shots... but Instagram was just purchased for $1Billion.

I'd be ill about that thought, but there are many, MANY hearty LOLs in this thread taking the edge off.

Thanks to all LOL providers! Keep up the good work!

/ many new favorites, too
 
2012-04-24 12:01:40 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: I think this style is going to be the 'olde tymey wild west' photos of the future

'Let's all dress up like great great grammy would have back in the 1980's'


I have a picture of my mother from 1985 with the epic 80's fro hair, wearing a white dress with TEAL COW SPOTS. I laugh at it every time.

She loves to protest that she was hip back in the day. She was in a band and everything.

/you'll never catch me DEAD in a real cow spot dress
 
2012-04-24 12:03:11 PM  

kiwimoogle84: Dead for Tax Reasons: I think this style is going to be the 'olde tymey wild west' photos of the future

'Let's all dress up like great great grammy would have back in the 1980's'

I have a picture of my mother from 1985 with the epic 80's fro hair, wearing a white dress with TEAL COW SPOTS.


Please scan and post that in this thread.

Please.
 
2012-04-24 12:05:01 PM  
Make it quick, I need to charge my cell phone, and shave my chest and stomach.

www.holidaymatinee.com
 
2012-04-24 12:05:17 PM  

bim1154: Krymson Tyde: [i232.photobucket.com image 300x450]

Now that pretty much ruined my morning.


I think I'M the one who needs a sword against those two.
 
2012-04-24 12:05:48 PM  
encrypted-tbn1.google.com
 
2012-04-24 12:06:54 PM  

Grables'Daughter: kiwimoogle84: Dead for Tax Reasons: I think this style is going to be the 'olde tymey wild west' photos of the future

'Let's all dress up like great great grammy would have back in the 1980's'

I have a picture of my mother from 1985 with the epic 80's fro hair, wearing a white dress with TEAL COW SPOTS.

Please scan and post that in this thread.

Please.


It would be epicness to be sure, but sadly I am at work and don't have it handy. So sad. I could probably do it tonight though.

She still has that dress in her closet too.

/the 80's hurts
//bad
 
2012-04-24 12:06:58 PM  

Krymson Tyde: [i232.photobucket.com image 480x600]


That made me laugh more than it should have. Thank you!
 
2012-04-24 12:10:03 PM  
www.clickorlando.com

"How long will you be staying on Mars?"
"Two weeks"
 
2012-04-24 12:10:22 PM  

Matthew Keene: Make it quick, I need to charge my cell phone, and shave my chest and stomach.


This reminds me of an advertisement I once saw for the OG camcorders back in the day... "rests comfortably on the shoulder, weighing only six pounds!"

*facepalm* I know it was revolutionary back in the day but how many back injuries were caused by six pounds on one shoulder for an hour at a time?
 
2012-04-24 12:10:48 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: CrispFlows: Holy HELL?!

[cdn2.mamapop.com image 396x511]

No shiat. These kids don't even look real.


Is that Eden Woods? Mmmm
 
2012-04-24 12:12:09 PM  
#25 please.
 
2012-04-24 12:13:32 PM  

Krymson Tyde: [flesh with a sword]


That poor, poor bed.
 
2012-04-24 12:14:10 PM  

bluehubcap: Those hollow-eyed little girls remind me of these dolls:

[i644.photobucket.com image 375x500]

Had one when I was a little girl


the one on the right reminds me of sasha grey. minus the penis in her butt of course.
 
2012-04-24 12:16:15 PM  

Andrew Wiggin: bluehubcap: Those hollow-eyed little girls remind me of these dolls:

[i644.photobucket.com image 375x500]

Had one when I was a little girl

the one on the right reminds me of sasha grey. minus the penis in her butt of course.


Of course
 
2012-04-24 12:18:05 PM  

CrispFlows: I found a bigger one:


WE DIDN'T NEED A BIGGER ONE!!
 
2012-04-24 12:19:14 PM  
30.media.tumblr.com

not a glamour shot but...
 
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