I have now been introduced to the words tiggy and stoush

When I was in high school, I caught a soccer ball in the stomach that knocked the wind out of me for nearly 2 minutes. I still get out of breath sometimes; in fact, it happens more frequently than ever.

I wonder if the statute of limitations has expired?

bullseye: Sophomore year of HS, playing softball in gym class. I hit a line drive right off the right knee of the shortstop who was daydreaming and she fell flat on the ground screaming. Half of the class thought I did it on purpose. They called an ambulance since she was pregnant. Amazingly only then did my HS institute a rule about pregnancy and gym class (it was a long time ago).

Anyhow, lawsuits were threatened against the school and against me (my family). Fortunately being destitute has certain advantages.


I know kids are dumb, but holy shiat. Tell you what, children: if your classmate can pick his spots (and I don't care how slow the pitch is, or how soft the ball is), you're already at a baseball academy.

/Might explain why they tried to sue you: "But he's gonna be in the big leagues w/ bat control like that!"

Was she told she wasn't allowed to participate in a sport where balls flew at her nose? Cause there goes her social life.....


/paraphrasing

spentmiles: Sometimes a lawsuit is the only way to afford medical care. When I was a little kid, I had a friend over playing Frisbee with me in the yard. He threw it up onto the roof of our two story house, so I told him he had to go up and get it. We got the ladder and he climbed up. While up there, he lost his footing and tumbled down the steep angle, over the side and onto the trampoline, which bounced him into the rose bushes where a rabid fox had holed up to die. The fox viciously attacked him, tearing off both his ears and his nose. So on top of the rabies treatment, he needed massive reconstructive surgery, which in addition to his other injuries, would've cost the family a few million dollars in the end. They didn't have health insurance, so suing our homeowner's provider was the only way he'd get the care he needed. He still got screwed though, because the insurance company wrote them a check for $50,000 and said that was the legal maximum they had to pay. I think they ended up just scrapping the kid and starting over.

This does not sound far-fetched at all.

FTA: "The claim, filed on behalf of Finley by her architect father Paul Burns."

Honest to God...if this farktwit was my architect, I'd fire him on the spot.

What an asshole of epic proportions.

This is a lot of CSBs.

CSB.

At my grade school in Japan we had recess on the roof of a four-story building, where we played dodge ball and duck-duck-goose. The railings were really low. One of the teachers had the wrong idea of 'goose' and got sued for sexual harassment.

I like juice.

bullseye: Sophomore year of HS, playing softball in gym class. I hit a line drive right off the right knee of the shortstop who was daydreaming and she fell flat on the ground screaming. Half of the class thought I did it on purpose. They called an ambulance since she was pregnant. Amazingly only then did my HS institute a rule about pregnancy and gym class (it was a long time ago).

Anyhow, lawsuits were threatened against the school and against me (my family). Fortunately being destitute has certain advantages.

I'd like to think that lawsuit wouldn't have gone anywhere anyway. And even if it did, lets face it; if a HS kid could hit a line drive and aim it so perfectly as to purposely hit the knee of the shortstop. said kid would be buried in a mountain of multi-million dollar MLB contracts...

In 7th grade I got a tennis ball line drived right into my nut sack and boy! let me tell you that put me down on the ground like a ton a bricks. Still get the shivers just thinking about it :-(

Good thing she didn't take a tennis ball too the knee. That really would have been serious.

Gleeman: vudukungfu: She wasn't wearing a helmet and elbow pads?
What is this?
1950?

[i.imgur.com image 485x362]

She forgot to cover his face and hands. Irresponsible who re.

Hi! I am what a New Zealand tennis player might look like.

School doesn't have parents sign appropriate waivers for physical education classes. Does not profit.

Also keep in mind this isn't a judgment, it's a lawsuit. Any moran can file a lawsuit - winning it is quite another thing.

Salt Lick Steady
2012-04-23 10:07:56 AM
This is a lot of CSBs.

CSB.

At my grade school in Japan we had recess on the roof of a four-story building, where we played dodge ball and duck-duck-goose. The railings were really low. One of the teachers had the wrong idea of 'goose' and got sued for sexual harassment.

I like juice.

LOL this isn't where I thought this was heading.....nicely done

PsyLord: FTA: The claim alleges Julia had hit classmate Finley Enright-Burns in the eye with a tennis ball during a tennis lesson at the Mudgeeraba school last October. It alleges Julia was "smashing'' balls back to Finley on the baseline when the incident happened.

I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline. Injuries when both players are at the net, yes, but when one is as far away as the baseline.

If they win I wouldn't be surprised if we start seeing school tennis programs requiring safety goggles on the court.

& when the tennis un-prodigy grows up, she can write about her father, the douche that ruined her chances of ever becoming popular.

spentmiles: Sometimes a lawsuit is the only way to afford medical care. When I was a little kid, I had a friend over playing Frisbee with me in the yard. He threw it up onto the roof of our two story house, so I told him he had to go up and get it. We got the ladder and he climbed up. While up there, he lost his footing and tumbled down the steep angle, over the side and onto the trampoline, which bounced him into the rose bushes where a rabid fox had holed up to die. The fox viciously attacked him, tearing off both his ears and his nose. So on top of the rabies treatment, he needed massive reconstructive surgery, which in addition to his other injuries, would've cost the family a few million dollars in the end. They didn't have health insurance, so suing our homeowner's provider was the only way he'd get the care he needed. He still got screwed though, because the insurance company wrote them a check for $50,000 and said that was the legal maximum they had to pay. I think they ended up just scrapping the kid and starting over.

Hee hee hee! This is why you're a lovely chartreuse.

And my, but you're getting a lot of bites today!

PsyLord: TyrantII: Act of God.

Unless you are professing that the little girl is God, I think you meant act of randomness.

Either everything is an act of god, or nothing is. There's no middle ground.

Father is apparently an insufferable douche and this case will in all probability be thrown out. Tennis is a relatively safe sport and it is unreasonable to require kids to don helmets and visors before taking the court. Perhaps this particular girl has no athletic ability and should avoid venturing into any athletic arena. Wowen's lacrosse is definitely not for her.

Aulus: FTFA: The claim, filed on behalf of Finley by her architect father Paul Burns, also names Somerset College and its Jay Deacon's Tennis School as defendants.

OK, I can see filing a liability claim against the school for failure to provide safety equipment, but filing suit against the girl? fark you, Paul Burns. Had I gotten that suit filed against my daughter, I would have been on the phone in a minute, calling him up and asking just when he became such a massive pussy.

Its tennis.... what safety equipment? The safety equipment is to not SUCK at tennis.

Man, I feel like I got gipped out of all these crazy lawsuits growing up. Twice while I was playing softball I got injured. Once I dislocated my finger and it had to splinted for a month and once the ball ricocheted off the bat and broke my nose. Neither of which we sued the school or anyone for and my dad is a lawyer.

Actually the one thing my dad taught me was use a lawsuit as a very, very last resort since they are expensive and waste a bunch of time. After I had to sue my tenant/roommate for damages and back owed rent I know what he means. Sure I won my judgement, but it cost me a couple hundred in filing and I haven't seen a penny of the money after five years.

This world is turning our children into pansies. Maybe we should beat them daily so they know what it feels like. I predict breakdown mass murders on an unprecedented level.

(whatever your faith or non-faith is) help us.

Carlos_Spicey_Weiner: PsyLord: FTA: The claim alleges Julia had hit classmate Finley Enright-Burns in the eye with a tennis ball during a tennis lesson at the Mudgeeraba school last October. It alleges Julia was "smashing'' balls back to Finley on the baseline when the incident happened.

I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline. Injuries when both players are at the net, yes, but when one is as far away as the baseline.

If they win I wouldn't be surprised if we start seeing school tennis programs requiring safety goggles on the court.

Are safety goggles really such a horrible idea?

I'm glad I grew up before all this lawsuit-happy crap started happening. I bet kids these days don't even know what a lawn dart is.

Nogale: bearcats1983: Wish I had known about this in high school. I took a rocket shot into my ball bag during a soccer game my senior year. Doubled over in pain, almost vommed on the field. Didn't realize I couldve sued for emotional damage. Of course, that never came to mind because I'm not a massive pu**y and my parents aren't litigious.

Didn't you have to wear jock straps?

No, not in soccer. I think it would get in the way most of the time. For the most part, you'd be surprised how quickly you can turn your body when you sense a ball honing into your crotch area.

scumsuckingmaggotlawyers-all one word-all inclusive.

Carlos_Spicey_Weiner: I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline.

Yeah, I guess what they mean by "smashing" is "ground stroke that went re-damn-diculously long". Which, ya know, anyone even vaguely familiar with the game is just going to move out of the way and let it hit the back fence.

Took tennis lessons when I was a kid for the hell of it... two handed backhand return volly right into a girls mid section... it was like the falcon punch of return vollys. Left a nice balls sized mark on her abdomen.... lol. We moved on coach told her to either hit it back or get out of the way.

meanmutton: Carlos_Spicey_Weiner: PsyLord: FTA: The claim alleges Julia had hit classmate Finley Enright-Burns in the eye with a tennis ball during a tennis lesson at the Mudgeeraba school last October. It alleges Julia was "smashing'' balls back to Finley on the baseline when the incident happened.

I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline. Injuries when both players are at the net, yes, but when one is as far away as the baseline.

If they win I wouldn't be surprised if we start seeing school tennis programs requiring safety goggles on the court.

Are safety goggles really such a horrible idea?

A tennis ball is too large to do serious eye damge. Racquetballs and squash balls are more likely require eye protection. They move a lot faster, too.

Tennis is for racquetball dropouts, anyway.

spentmiles: Sometimes a lawsuit is the only way to afford medical care. When I was a little kid, I had a friend over playing Frisbee with me in the yard. He threw it up onto the roof of our two story house, so I told him he had to go up and get it. We got the ladder and he climbed up. While up there, he lost his footing and tumbled down the steep angle, over the side and onto the trampoline, which bounced him into the rose bushes where a rabid fox had holed up to die. The fox viciously attacked him, tearing off both his ears and his nose. So on top of the rabies treatment, he needed massive reconstructive surgery, which in addition to his other injuries, would've cost the family a few million dollars in the end. They didn't have health insurance, so suing our homeowner's provider was the only way he'd get the care he needed. He still got screwed though, because the insurance company wrote them a check for $50,000 and said that was the legal maximum they had to pay. I think they ended up just scrapping the kid and starting over.

Sometimes, you just gotta cut your losses.
But if you are sending your 13 year old to private school, you can probably afford health insurance

bearcats1983: No, not in soccer. I think it would get in the way most of the time. For the most part, you'd be surprised how quickly you can turn your body when you sense a ball honing into your crotch area.

No joke- I was pitching at softball practice yesterday (slow pitch) and I got absolutely blasted by a line drive- in the tenth? of a second that the ball had to travel from the bat to my balls-zone, I managed to shirk sideways and took it on the side of the hip, on the exact plane of the berry bag. I'm very glad that the 4 inch welt I have is on the hip, and not on my nuts.

jtr: I have now been introduced to the words tiggy and stoush

but WTF is tiggy?

"We can't wrap our kids in cotton wool. "

No! If you want to compare yourselves to the US of A you best upgrade that to bubblewrap.

actualhuman: Carlos_Spicey_Weiner: I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline.

Yeah, I guess what they mean by "smashing" is "ground stroke that went re-damn-diculously long". Which, ya know, anyone even vaguely familiar with the game is just going to move out of the way and let it hit the back fence.


I just figured they meant 'smashing', as in, a standing overhead strike, sending the ball sharply downward into the opponent's court, intending for it to bounce high out of reach. Players who aren't pros often mishiat these, which probably happened here. It likely bounced 3/4 of the way to the baseline, then came up and hit her in the eye.

In either case, all she needed to do was, as you said, move of the way (you know, play tennis!), but because she sucks now there are lawyers involved.

/We had archery in our gym class. So much potential....

There is only one solution to this, shut down everything. No high school sports, no gym classes, no physical activity. Think of all the money the schools will be saving, I bet if they fired all the gym teachers they could hire a part time music teacher.

kvinesknows: jtr: I have now been introduced to the words tiggy and stoush

but WTF is tiggy?

A female hepcat.

grinding_journalist: bearcats1983: No, not in soccer. I think it would get in the way most of the time. For the most part, you'd be surprised how quickly you can turn your body when you sense a ball honing into your crotch area.

No joke- I was pitching at softball practice yesterday (slow pitch) and I got absolutely blasted by a line drive- in the tenth? of a second that the ball had to travel from the bat to my balls-zone, I managed to shirk sideways and took it on the side of the hip, on the exact plane of the berry bag. I'm very glad that the 4 inch welt I have is on the hip, and not on my nuts.

Oh yea, that's exactly what I'm talking about. It's almost like time slows down (like in Wanted) and you know exactly how to maneuver in those quarter seconds.

csb

I was in Grade 7 and we were doing badminton at lunch time as the current intramural sport. Grade 7 lunch ran from 1130 to 1230. Grade 9 and up ran from 1200 to 100. So when our 1220 buzzer went to tell us to get to class we were right at the end of a game and couldn't quit. We kept going until I finally won with 2 minutes to spare to get to class I DASHED full steam across another court.. getting smacked right in the face by some Grade 12 girl's badminton racquet. A Huge cut opened on my lip. Blood everywhere. I sucked it up and went to class bleeding lip and all. The next day the girl stopped me to apologize and.. KISSED IT BETTER!!!! YAY! My first kiss from a girl that I was not related to!

What will be the next Nanny State?

NO ONE is going to allow that kid to play outside under their supervision anymore. No school, no friend's parents, no extracurricular facilities, etc. The father just single-handedly ruined their childhood. Enjoy your plastic bubble kid.

Loomy: actualhuman: Carlos_Spicey_Weiner: I've been playing competitive tennis for a long time and I've never heard of anyone suffering an eye injury while standing near the baseline.

Yeah, I guess what they mean by "smashing" is "ground stroke that went re-damn-diculously long". Which, ya know, anyone even vaguely familiar with the game is just going to move out of the way and let it hit the back fence.


I just figured they meant 'smashing', as in, a standing overhead strike, sending the ball sharply downward into the opponent's court, intending for it to bounce high out of reach. Players who aren't pros often mishiat these, which probably happened here. It likely bounced 3/4 of the way to the baseline, then came up and hit her in the eye.

In either case, all she needed to do was, as you said, move of the way (you know, play tennis!), but because she sucks now there are lawyers involved.

/We had archery in our gym class. So much potential....

Oh yeah, I forgot that was another term for an overhead stroke. And newbies do tend to forget to hit down on those.

/got nuthin

bearcats1983: grinding_journalist: bearcats1983: No, not in soccer. I think it would get in the way most of the time. For the most part, you'd be surprised how quickly you can turn your body when you sense a ball honing into your crotch area.

No joke- I was pitching at softball practice yesterday (slow pitch) and I got absolutely blasted by a line drive- in the tenth? of a second that the ball had to travel from the bat to my balls-zone, I managed to shirk sideways and took it on the side of the hip, on the exact plane of the berry bag. I'm very glad that the 4 inch welt I have is on the hip, and not on my nuts.

Oh yea, that's exactly what I'm talking about. It's almost like time slows down (like in Wanted) and you know exactly how to maneuver in those quarter seconds.

That's because it does, kind of. Your brain goes in to high speed camera mode and makes things seem to move slower, because its processing information more quickly. It's capturing more frames per second.

In physics its called time dilation. Psychiatry borrows the term.

LoneDoggie: two words - 'loser pays'

Two words: Corporate Overlords


Seriously, who the FARK would ever sue a large corporation again if losing included paying MILLIONS in their defense costs.

CSB
Older brother had this happen to him when he was in HS. Lost most of the vision in that eye. Really freaky 1 in a million chance of the ball hitting just right(or wrong, depending on your point of view), driving the eye back in the socket and badly damaging the optic nerve. Letterman in track and field, football, and soccer. All of that was over. The sports scholarship to college was down the drain.
While I wan in Jr high, I saw from left field(playing far forward) one kid playing shortstop was nailed by a line drive in the groin. S-l-o-w-l-y fell forward, and curled up into the fetal position. Gym coach was teaching us how to field line-drive hits, so he knew it was coming, too.
While playing ball one summer with the family during a reunion(I was 12-13), searching for a previously fouled ball, I heard a shout from everyone else still playing along the lines of, "Don't look up!!" ... What do I do? Yep. Best black eye my grandfather had ever seen. Looked like a raccoon for 3 weeks.

/csb
//brother's vision loss turned out not to matter too much, as he passed in a car accident a few months later