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(ESPN)   Can Dixon finally stop finishing second? Will Lotus' new hamster policy prevail? It's the Toyota Grand Prix of Long Beach (coverage starts 3:30 EDT on NBC Sports Network)   (espn.go.com) divider line 84
    More: Cool, Grand Prix of Long Beach  
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233 clicks; posted to Sports » on 15 Apr 2012 at 2:30 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-04-15 03:59:01 PM
2 votes:

Mztlplx: Awright. Old race fan, but IRL Noob here. Who is who? I'd like to start picking up on this.


The two biggest teams are Ganassi and Penske.

Second tier is Andretti Motorsport, KV, etc

Ganassi has Franchitti, Dixon, and I think Graham Rahal. Penske has (the awesomely named) Will Power, Ryan Briscoe, and Helio Castroneves.

Will Power's photo should be posted in this thread soon, with him flipping the double bird at the control tower after they decided to restart on a wet oval without rain tires.

Indycar split in the mid 90s, with two series trying to kill each other, and the oval based IRL beating out the more road course heavy "Champ Car" due to having the Indy 500. The series merged back together, and oddly enough we have more road and street courses than ovals, though part of that is the result of Dan Wheldon's death at Las Vegas last year.

This is a new car. Turbocharged engines are back. The body style is designed to make for safer racing, preventing tires from interlocking. All cars were Hondas for awhile. Now there are Hondas, Chevys, and Lotus.

Lotus almost farked the series by falling waaaayyy behind in their engine development program. There almost weren't even enough engines for all the teams to run. When Lotus did hit the track, they were slow as fark, prompting me to wonder if they were powered by hamster wheels. DanZero picked up the joke for the next race's headline, and so now that's a big joke. Despite that, Lotus driver Sebastian Bourdais has done okay with them. Oddly enough, there's a "Lotus" that's a Chevy. It makes no sense.

We used to make fun of EJ Viso, who would be the one who made races "official" by wrecking. However, he's actually doing pretty damn well this season, and I promised the Farker who seems to be involved with his team that I'd stop making fun of him if he makes it through at least the end of the Indy 500 without wrecking. He's actually on track (get it?) to do that.

Rubens Barichello was Michael Schumacher's teammate in Formula 1, and raced for Williams last year. He was not renewed for a 20th season, so fellow Brazillian Tony Kanaan enticed him to come to Indycar. Rubens is adjusting to driving more "primitive" (read: fun) cars. We'll see if he can win sooner or later.

James Hinchcliffe is driving the GoDaddy car for Andretti motorsport that Danica used to drive, earning him the nickname "Manica." He's a comedian kinda guy, and showed up to a race with a Danica wig.

Robin Miller is a reporter we just saw running down pit road, who is generally a curmudgeon, but his opinion is worth listening to.
2012-04-15 06:30:41 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: GardenWeasel: TurboKat has to migrate to IndyCar. We need an anti-Power idol.

Nooooooo. His current idol already causes collateral damage to my Nascar driver, just by team association. There will be no anti-Power idol. Besides, wouldn't it just cancel out when we ask the idol for MOAR POWER? Hmmmmm


Yeah, saying, "TK, we need more Power!" would probably break a hole in the universe.
2012-04-15 06:28:27 PM
1 votes:

GardenWeasel: TurboKat has to migrate to IndyCar. We need an anti-Power idol.


Nooooooo. His current idol already causes collateral damage to my Nascar driver, just by team association. There will be no anti-Power idol. Besides, wouldn't it just cancel out when we ask the idol for MOAR POWER? Hmmmmm
2012-04-15 06:23:36 PM
1 votes:
Podium cat congratulates:
i.imgur.com
Will Power, Simon Pagenaud, Takuma Sato, Ryan Hunter-Rey, The Mayor of Hinchtown
2012-04-15 06:20:16 PM
1 votes:
And Hunter-Reay gets penalized for dumping Sato.
2012-04-15 06:19:33 PM
1 votes:

clear_prop: Mztlplx: I take it that Indy Cars don't have much of a reverse gear.

I think they are supposed to this year, along with anti-stall bits in the engine computer, but doesn't seem to be working too well.


IndyCar will never have reverse. Too much weight.
2012-04-15 06:19:10 PM
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm
Can you be penalized for blocking on a victory lap? #indycar #TGPLB
2012-04-15 06:19:04 PM
1 votes:
That was just a really wacky race. I hope next weeks is just as entertaining.
2012-04-15 06:17:18 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: Guess Will Power will just have to celebrate there.


The old man who can't get an interview will just run out on the track
2012-04-15 06:16:09 PM
1 votes:
Guess Will Power will just have to celebrate there.
2012-04-15 06:14:41 PM
1 votes:
We are well entertained today.

A double deuce to all fans

www.hrwiki.org
2012-04-15 06:13:39 PM
1 votes:
Sato
i.imgur.com
2012-04-15 06:13:17 PM
1 votes:
Makes you wonder if Rahal had been paying attention.


Oh no! Sato spun!
2012-04-15 06:12:41 PM
1 votes:
Props to Viso for getting out of the way.
2012-04-15 06:12:15 PM
1 votes:
LOL VISO
2012-04-15 06:12:07 PM
1 votes:
Viso's playing spoiler
2012-04-15 06:11:03 PM
1 votes:
Oh boy, Power's gotta pass E.J. Viso. This is going to get interesting.
2012-04-15 06:10:04 PM
1 votes:
Hildrebrand almost treated TK like he was turn 4 at Indy
2012-04-15 06:08:07 PM
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2012-04-15 06:04:00 PM
1 votes:

Tsrwedge: NBC, this isn't NASCAR; you don't have to go to commercial every three minutes.


But at least they are doing more side by side than NASCAR ever would
2012-04-15 06:03:07 PM
1 votes:
NBC, this isn't NASCAR; you don't have to go to commercial every three minutes.
2012-04-15 06:02:52 PM
1 votes:

clear_prop: Announcer: Only 14 laps to go

Ticker: 11 laps to go

Hopefully the announcer is right, to extend the lulz of this race.


That's one hell of an F-Bomb delay there.
2012-04-15 06:02:46 PM
1 votes:
Simona
i.imgur.com
2012-04-15 05:59:39 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: To be fair, I think the admins keep the filter around as much for the laughs as anything. For instance, there have been many April Fools days where they'd just subtly tweak it to fark with us.

/Go Sato!
//Deserves that win sooner or later


Yeah, I remember when the AF filter would add something to everyone's posts like "I'm shaking it to the left and to the right"

and THIS
2012-04-15 05:58:12 PM
1 votes:

DanZero: Jensaarai: I got filter owned in an MMA thread by saying UFC followed by the word "knows." Example:

"Every fan of the Ufarknows that Brock Lesnar has no chin"

So you cant even put FC and K together. nice. Feels like grade school here -- can't upset the sponsors!


To be fair, I think the admins keep the filter around as much for the laughs as anything. For instance, there have been many April Fools days where they'd just subtly tweak it to fark with us.

/Go Sato!
//Deserves that win sooner or later
2012-04-15 05:57:42 PM
1 votes:

DanZero: Jensaarai: I got filter owned in an MMA thread by saying UFC followed by the word "knows." Example:

"Every fan of the Ufarknows that Brock Lesnar has no chin"

So you cant even put FC and K together. nice. Feels like grade school here -- can't upset the sponsors!


Its more to keep Fark from being flagged by corporate web filters.
2012-04-15 05:57:28 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: Yeah! MOAR POWER!!1


Sato's doing surprisingly well too
2012-04-15 05:56:59 PM
1 votes:
Pagenaud pits. Power to the lead, Sato in second, Barrichello in third, Pagenaud returns in 4th.
2012-04-15 05:55:07 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: I got filter owned in an MMA thread by saying UFC followed by the word "knows." Example:

"Every fan of the Ufarknows that Brock Lesnar has no chin"


So you cant even put FC and K together. nice. Feels like grade school here -- can't upset the sponsors!
2012-04-15 05:53:27 PM
1 votes:

DanZero: clear_prop: catastrophe averted:
Thanks. I've been trying to figure it out in context of the threads for a couple weeks now and just couldn't get there.

I think there are other words that trigger the Weeners filter as well, since I know I've hit it on other phrases.

Yeah but FFS there are legitimate uses for those words "first" & "post", and "response".


they plug a thesaurus into the filter somehow.
2012-04-15 05:52:57 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: And watch out for the "bit" filter. Much hilarity ensues in computer threads.

Bit followed by check - biatcheck.


DanZero: clear_prop: catastrophe averted:
Thanks. I've been trying to figure it out in context of the threads for a couple weeks now and just couldn't get there.

I think there are other words that trigger the Weeners filter as well, since I know I've hit it on other phrases.

Yeah but FFS there are legitimate uses for those words "first" & "post", and "response".


I got filter owned in an MMA thread by saying UFC followed by the word "knows." Example:

"Every fan of the Ufarknows that Brock Lesnar has no chin"
2012-04-15 05:51:07 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: And watch out for the "bit" filter. Much hilarity ensues in computer threads.

Bit followed by check - biatcheck.


I admit I like that filter. A biatch(word) = teh lulz
2012-04-15 05:50:23 PM
1 votes:

clear_prop: catastrophe averted:
Thanks. I've been trying to figure it out in context of the threads for a couple weeks now and just couldn't get there.

I think there are other words that trigger the Weeners filter as well, since I know I've hit it on other phrases.


Yeah but FFS there are legitimate uses for those words "first" & "post", and "response".
2012-04-15 05:50:02 PM
1 votes:
And watch out for the "bit" filter. Much hilarity ensues in computer threads.

Bit followed by check - biatcheck.
2012-04-15 05:47:07 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: DanZero: Ok so I know "Thirst pohst" typed out correctly = Boobies

So is it "first" then "response"? Let's see.

Weeners

Thanks. I've been trying to figure it out in context of the threads for a couple weeks now and just couldn't get there.


You learn a lot about Fark by hanging with us :D
2012-04-15 05:45:46 PM
1 votes:

ClavellBCMI: How in the wide, wide, world of sports does she still have a job driving race cars?


She's Venezuelan. Citgo is Venezuelan. So are most of the other sponsors she's ever had. Somebody in their government likes her.

If you're a struggling car owner and she shows up with a guaranteed full year of sponsorship, it's awfully tempting to put her in a ride, especially if you're a multi car team.
2012-04-15 05:43:33 PM
1 votes:

DanZero: Ok so I know "Thirst pohst" typed out correctly = Boobies

So is it "first" then "response"? Let's see.

Weeners


That's it clear. You put those 2 words together even in a legimiate usage = hilarity
2012-04-15 05:42:28 PM
1 votes:
Ok so I know "Thirst pohst" typed out correctly = Boobies

So is it "first" then "response"? Let's see.

Weeners
2012-04-15 05:42:26 PM
1 votes:

ClavellBCMI: Jensaarai: Stitch Jones: Every time I see the CITGO car, I fear they let Milka back in..

Yeah, I thought that Viso in the CITGO scheme was a recipe for disaster. So far, even with the contact penalty, he's not been living up (or, rather, down?) to it.

That said, Milka Duno has been living up to her reputation over in ARCA. God help us if her sponsorship money ever gets her into NASCAR.

How in the wide, wide, world of sports does she still have a job driving race cars?


Two words. Boobies.
2012-04-15 05:41:24 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: Stitch Jones: Every time I see the CITGO car, I fear they let Milka back in..

Yeah, I thought that Viso in the CITGO scheme was a recipe for disaster. So far, even with the contact penalty, he's not been living up (or, rather, down?) to it.

That said, Milka Duno has been living up to her reputation over in ARCA. God help us if her sponsorship money ever gets her into NASCAR.


How in the wide, wide, world of sports does she still have a job driving race cars?
2012-04-15 05:41:19 PM
1 votes:

clear_prop: Stupid filter. I think I said first and then the second word was try. I thought that filter was only triggered by the worst last followed by post.


Let me try those 2 words out together.

First try

Thirst pohst

Boobies

Last post
2012-04-15 05:41:11 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: eventhelosers: Mztlplx: Jensaarai: clear_prop: water as the Weeners doesn't get extinguisher powder all over everything.

Good to know ;)

If I didn't know about the Fark Filter (tm), i'd be seriously weirded out.

I was still weirded out

I know about the filter, but still can't figure out what word(s) it is filtering here.... supressant?


"First" followed by the word "response" results in that. It makes sense in context.
2012-04-15 05:39:25 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: eventhelosers: Mztlplx: Jensaarai: clear_prop: water as the Weeners doesn't get extinguisher powder all over everything.

Good to know ;)

If I didn't know about the Fark Filter (tm), i'd be seriously weirded out.

I was still weirded out

I know about the filter, but still can't figure out what word(s) it is filtering here.... supressant?


I've been trying to figure that out too. Weird! I know words like "thirst" and "pohst" in their normal vernacular would cause those filter words to appear
2012-04-15 05:37:57 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: Heh. Now Power's in 2nd.

/he was listening, Dan


Guess we weren't being sufficiently entertained
2012-04-15 05:36:28 PM
1 votes:
mental pictures of safety crew peeing on car
2012-04-15 05:36:22 PM
1 votes:
There's definitely some debris out there.

I think it's part of Helio's wing.
2012-04-15 05:33:53 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: clear_prop: water as the Weeners doesn't get extinguisher powder all over everything.

Good to know ;)


If I didn't know about the Fark Filter (tm), i'd be seriously weirded out.
2012-04-15 05:32:55 PM
1 votes:

clear_prop: water as the Weeners doesn't get extinguisher powder all over everything.


Good to know ;)
2012-04-15 05:32:24 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: CONWAY!? NO WAIIIII!!!!1
[i.imgur.com image 400x282]


Okay, WTF Indycar safety crew? Seriously, a bucket of water?


Wait, did that happen? I looked away? They seriously threw a bucket of water on the car? Is Barnhart in charge again!?

/WILL POWER!
2012-04-15 05:32:04 PM
1 votes:

eventhelosers: no money for extinguishers in Indy?


What an Indycar safety crew may look like:

i.imgur.com
2012-04-15 05:29:49 PM
1 votes:
CONWAY!? NO WAIIIII!!!!1
i.imgur.com


Okay, WTF Indycar safety crew? Seriously, a bucket of water?
2012-04-15 05:27:36 PM
1 votes:
Hey, James Jakes can drive after all!

And there's Ruebens. Really odd seeing him in a IndyCar.
2012-04-15 05:26:03 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: Akio Toyota. Every time I hear that, I keep hearing Accio Toyota! and expect a car to come flying through the air.

/my daughter made me take her to all the Harry Potter movies


No shame. You are not the first person to admit to thinking this in a Fark thread. ;)
2012-04-15 05:22:51 PM
1 votes:

Stitch Jones: Every time I see the CITGO car, I fear they let Milka back in..


Yeah, I thought that Viso in the CITGO scheme was a recipe for disaster. So far, even with the contact penalty, he's not been living up (or, rather, down?) to it.

That said, Milka Duno has been living up to her reputation over in ARCA. God help us if her sponsorship money ever gets her into NASCAR.
2012-04-15 05:20:11 PM
1 votes:
Will Power suddenly realized he was racing with James Jakes, and moved on.
2012-04-15 05:19:07 PM
1 votes:

Jensaarai: DanZero: GardenWeasel: Jensaarai: Okay, what the hell, Cars.com?

wtfamiwatching.jpg

[www.adweek.com image 484x272]

/sorry

This race:

[www.adweek.com image 484x272]


Ha nice
2012-04-15 05:16:52 PM
1 votes:
Every time I see the CITGO car, I fear they let Milka back in..
2012-04-15 05:16:48 PM
1 votes:

DanZero: GardenWeasel: Jensaarai: Okay, what the hell, Cars.com?

wtfamiwatching.jpg

[www.adweek.com image 484x272]

/sorry


This race:

www.adweek.com
2012-04-15 05:16:29 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: Judas Priest in a minivan commercial.

Le sigh.


You've got another (paycheck) coming
2012-04-15 05:15:20 PM
1 votes:
Judas Priest in a minivan commercial.

Le sigh.
2012-04-15 05:14:45 PM
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm

As if that lap wasn't gut-wrenching enough, THANK YOU for mentioning the Titanic also. #IndyCar

nascarcasm @nascarcasm

Has Dario been erroneously informed that he has to drop back 10 spots?
2012-04-15 05:12:32 PM
1 votes:
These cleanup crews really need to get their acts together. So far this year we've had their inability to push back to pits, refire a car, give a quick jump, and now they put Dixon's car in the wrong place.
2012-04-15 05:10:27 PM
1 votes:

Mztlplx: Barrichello to 13th? Did he pit?


He must have. Remember, he farked his wing on Justin Wildon's bumper.

Wow, so the hamsters are 7 MPH slower on the straights?
2012-04-15 05:08:56 PM
1 votes:
This isn't so much Indycar as it is Bumper Cars!
2012-04-15 05:07:58 PM
1 votes:
That was a HORRIBLE restart for Franchitti.

Dude, DARIO, STOP RUNNING PEOPLE OVER! Geez...
2012-04-15 05:06:14 PM
1 votes:
Our pole sitter now gets to start first, after being mid pack all race.

I swear, this makes sense somehow.
2012-04-15 05:04:43 PM
1 votes:
Aw, I wanted the "Fuzzy's" car to win, just for the sponse being "Fuzzy's". Damn it, Carpenter.

So, let's see. Caution review........and Dixon is stalled.

Review:

Andretti catapults off the back of Rahal, flies into tires.
Rahal's car suffers race ending damage.
Legge goes into the tire.
Conway suffers a gear failure.
Dixon stall.

W...T...F.....
2012-04-15 05:04:29 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: DanZero: Dixon? Get your ass to 2nd pronto

Not like that, he won't


He's makin my headline look bad
2012-04-15 04:58:45 PM
1 votes:
We've secretly replaced every driver with EJ Viso and Milka Duno clones, and replaced EJ Viso with Mario Andretti. Let's see if anyone notices...

Oh, you noticed?
2012-04-15 04:58:21 PM
1 votes:

FiendishFellow05: OK....THAT wasn't supposed to happen. 3 races in, and the new car fails the "won't get airborne". Great.

And how the hell did Legge end up in the tires?!?


Welll.....you run over someones back tire, you're going airborne. You'd be amazed, even relatively slow speeds are basically highway speeds. Watched a FNippon race at Suzuka back in '03 or '04, driver clipped another on the back wheel entering the last chicane (a notoriously slow corner), but was still going fast enough to be launched through the air all the way across the track.

Those skirts on the back will reduce that, but as long as you have rubber exposed, it's going to happen. Heck, saw it happen in the Continental Sports Car race at Barber, a Mustang got air off the back of another one on a restart.
2012-04-15 04:57:59 PM
1 votes:
WHY is Mario Andretti shilling GoDaddy? That just makes me sad. Especially after seeing Marco tear up that car. SEE WHAT MARIO DOES TO PAY YOUR BILLS?!?
2012-04-15 04:57:13 PM
1 votes:
Wait, Bourdais is *back* on track? How the fark?

Okay, my brain is officially broken. I have no insight.
2012-04-15 04:57:04 PM
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: Someone posted a pic in the F1 thread about: it isn't a red bull car, you don't have wings.... something to that effect. Applicable now.


img.photobucket.com
2012-04-15 04:56:05 PM
1 votes:
........this race just went to plaid. Seriously.
2012-04-15 04:52:21 PM
1 votes:

Kurohone: FiendishFellow05: Kurohone: Is the IRL Lotus Renault Lotus, Caterham Lotus, or some other Lotus?

*blinks*

There's more than one Lotus? Didn't know that.

Well there's Lotus Cars, which is owned by Proton.

Then there was Team Lotus, which was owned by Tony Fernandes (a Malaysian, unsure if he's part of Proton or not). They were in F1 until this year when they became Caterham.

But in the meantime, Team Renault started using Lotus branding last year, until this year when THEY became Team Lotus. So in F1 Lotus became Caterham, while Renault became Lotus.

And now there are Lotus engines in IndyCar, which apparently have nothing to do with any of the three previously mentioned Lotus. And last year there were cars that LOOKED like Lotuses except were Hondas (like everything else). And the Lotuses this year seem to look nothing like a Lotus, so if you're looking for those like you were last year, you're out of luck.

Clear?


*head spins* Geeeeeeez. I think...I follow...all..that.

WHOA...Marco Andretti just SLAMMED the tires! And Rahal has no rear spolier! WTF?!?
2012-04-15 04:50:26 PM
1 votes:
img.photobucket.com
2012-04-15 04:49:16 PM
1 votes:
Okay, so in F1 there is the team that was Lotus, the Renault that is now Lotus. And of course none of this is old Lotus. Now, Group Lotus was involved in a lawsuit involving Lotus.

Meanwhile, back in the US, Lotus sponsored the Honda powered KV racing last year, and somehow seemed involved in the team, but they run Chevys, and apparently always planned to. So now there's a different team Lotus, and Lotus started making engines.

Also, hamsters.
2012-04-15 04:46:35 PM
1 votes:
Bourdais saw a Hamsteri.imgur.com

Full course Yellow
i.imgur.com
2012-04-15 04:45:28 PM
1 votes:
HAMSTER ALERT HAMSTER ALERT

YES ITS A LOTUS
2012-04-15 04:41:47 PM
1 votes:

Kurohone: It really sucks Simona's got Lotus this year, she'll never get to show any skills. Same for Legge, though she never really went anywhere after Champcar.


Chicks dig hamsters (as well as being in last)
2012-04-15 04:21:59 PM
1 votes:
We only wish we could cut to commercial this fast -- NASCAR
i640.photobucket.com
2012-04-15 04:18:00 PM
1 votes:
Justin Wilson?

images.paxholley.net
2012-04-15 03:59:10 PM
1 votes:
What the f**k was THAT? LMAO...
2012-04-15 03:55:04 PM
1 votes:
SyFy is dead
 
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