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(Mirror.co.uk)   Woman hires female private eye to see if her boyfriend would cheat on her. Turns out he would. He's now dating the female private eye. Don't laugh. These are all terrible, terrible people   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 298
    More: Amusing, female private eye, wrong number, dating, boyfriends  
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37706 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Apr 2012 at 11:18 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-12 02:08:06 PM

Dr.Knockboots: Flakeloaf: What do you expect? The private eye *clap* was watching him *clap clap* watching his every move, baby.

fireclown: HERO tag unavailable?

Seriously, the punchline will be in about three weeks when the Private eye (clap clap) dumps him. There are no good people in this whole story, I suspect.

I know the "clap clap" is obvious and possibly dumb, but I can't stop laughing picturing how matter-of-factly you both are throwing in the "clap clap"


Oh. So no-one told you the thread was gonna be this way?
 
2012-04-12 02:10:00 PM

Inflatable Rhetoric: Fidelity is overrated.

If your SO cheats on you, what are you cheated out of?
What did you have that you don't still have?

Jealousy is a property issue, as in, "That's my girl/man/woman."


A reduced risk of exposure to an STD that a monogamous relationship gives you is one of the things you are cheated out of.

Another would be trust. If your SO/spouse/life partner cannot trust you how can anybody else?

If you have an open relationship then of course it would not be cheating.
 
2012-04-12 02:11:37 PM

royone: How come the Tfettes never comment on the hittability of the guys in stories?


Because that wouldn't be about them, dummy.
 
2012-04-12 02:16:26 PM

Digitalstrange: Lupine Chemist: LeroyBourne: I'd be worried if a girl wanted to move in after 6 weeks. Shiat, 6 months of dating is still a bit quick.

I'm planning on getting a place with the girl after 6 months and we both feel it's incredibly fast. Only doing it because things are working so well.

If you are really compatible then 2 days isn't too soon, and if you aren't then waiting 6 years to try it won't help. Pretty much the logical decision point is when you are spending 4 nights a week or more together for over a month straight. If that feels good and you want more then it's time to take the step forward. If you aren't looking forward to more time then it's time to consider moving on.


That sounds... unwise. It's more like this. Nearly anyone can overlook incompatibility if things are good. And the less you are in situations where you are incompatible, the less likely it is that you'll realize you are incompatible. If the sex is good, and you spend more than half of one month having sex, you've likely reduced your probability of finding something fundamentally incompatible by half. You can't tell me that after one month of good sex you know the person well enough to move in with them, unless that's your only criteria. You might be compatibile, but if it's true, it will be true in 5-11 more months. And by then you are much more likely to have been exposed to that person enough to be certain that you're compatible.

So if you think you're a great (impeccable) judge of character, have fairly specific, easily figurable standards for a relationship, or aren't easily hurt by relationships not working out, go for it. But I don't think that describes many people. It seems that the risks are high, rewards are very low (you're already having sex more than half of the time), and it's not going to work out well a lot of the time. Why put yourself through that?
 
2012-04-12 02:24:59 PM

Burr: Deadwing: probesport: Somewhere in a lonely hotel room there's a guy starting to realize That eternal fate has turned it's back on him.

Is it 2:00 a.m.?

It is, and the fear is gone.


How warm is the gun?
 
2012-04-12 02:39:30 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: ihatedumbpeople: Looks ain't everything. It's even worse if she's hot but a cold fish where it counts. Hot doesn't equal 'fun'.

This.

Also, nobody "steals" a lover. If he left Blonde Suspicion for the Honeypot, he was on the way out already.


This x gajillion
 
2012-04-12 02:42:05 PM
So a perfectly normal girl, nothing wrong with her- just asks some bald mustachio out, moves in six weeks later, offers to fix his phone, finds a flirty text from a girl, that she lets him delete (" he said it was a wrong number and that whatever I was thinking was wrong!" ha.)- then hires some babe to hit on him and lure to a hotel so she catch him in the act- What a prize! I'm not saying this guy isn't a douche, just that this chick is all sorts of crazy- How long till she said she was in love with him, I wonder? Before or after she invaded his home? Now his phone is fixed and he has a much hotter girlfriend- I hate when girls are this stupid.

What immediately came to mind- Wake up- He's a shape-shifter!

Link (new window)
 
2012-04-12 02:42:38 PM
Speaking from experience, the less your S.O. trusts you, the better the chance that they will cheat on you their selves. Let us not forget it's an inescapable human tendency to judge others according to our own values, mores, methods and motivations.
 
2012-04-12 02:43:04 PM
www.earwolf.com
"All cases are solved with logic. The only logical way to find out if Donna is a cheater is to seduce her, bring her to orgasm, then call Michael and tell him the sad news."
 
2012-04-12 02:43:33 PM
Having been on all sides of the cheating situation (the cheater, the cheated and the other woman) I like to think I have a good idea of what goes wrong. Usually it is lack of sex/affection. If two people don't have similar sex drives a monogamous relationship most likely wont work. Or, the relationship has already died and the two people have drifted away from each other emotionally. People at this point seem to stay together for comfort; they're unhappy but it's not that bad sort of deal or they stay together for kid/s.

/currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible
 
2012-04-12 02:46:39 PM
Also, no cheating situation ends well for anyone involved.
 
2012-04-12 02:47:14 PM

ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible


Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.
 
2012-04-12 02:47:52 PM
I wish my woman would hire a detective on me.

*drools*
 
2012-04-12 02:49:20 PM
Current situation is way too complicated to describe here but it is a sort of open relationship.
 
2012-04-12 02:50:19 PM

ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.


Current situation is way too complicated to describe here but it is a sort of open relationship.

/oops.
 
2012-04-12 02:53:32 PM

ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.


I used to think the same thing but now I'm not sure. What if the guy has been cheating on his wife for a decade or more and ForMadmenOnly is just the flavor of the month? If he weren't with her, he'd be with someone else.
 
2012-04-12 02:53:34 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Current situation is way too complicated to describe here but it is a sort of open relationship.


"sort of open"?

Sounds like someone is having fun at someone else's expense to me. Unless you'd be perfectly fine in the other woman's shoes, you should walk away.

If you would be perfectly fine, I'm not really sure why your "been on both sides" expertise is worth anything.

This is all predicated on the idea that you don't think of yourself as a me-first, me-only sociopath, of course.
 
2012-04-12 02:55:42 PM

umad: You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me


I am in a perfectly fine (AFAIK!) relationship with my husband, we have one kid. I would have absolutely no issue with him having a paternity test. It would not make me feel hurt or betrayed or ANYTHING.

Paternity tests should not be a trust issue. They should just be done. It's no more emotionally draining than blood typing your baby, IMO.
 
2012-04-12 02:56:06 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Having been on all sides of the cheating situation (the cheater, the cheated and the other woman) I like to think I have a good idea of what goes wrong. Usually it is lack of sex/affection. If two people don't have similar sex drives a monogamous relationship most likely wont work. Or, the relationship has already died and the two people have drifted away from each other emotionally. People at this point seem to stay together for comfort; they're unhappy but it's not that bad sort of deal or they stay together for kid/s.

/currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible


Ray Parker Jr. Approves of this Message.
 
2012-04-12 02:56:55 PM

Nogale: I used to think the same thing but now I'm not sure. What if the guy has been cheating on his wife for a decade or more and ForMadmenOnly is just the flavor of the month? If he weren't with her, he'd be with someone else.


Because the right course of action there is to (1) tell him to fark off, (2) let the wife know (in writing, not in person), and (3) walk away.


i116.photobucket.com

Just walk away.
 
2012-04-12 02:58:59 PM

Nogale: ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.

I used to think the same thing but now I'm not sure. What if the guy has been cheating on his wife for a decade or more and ForMadmenOnly is just the flavor of the month? If he weren't with her, he'd be with someone else.


I'm not some evil chick that goes after married men but I've found that most of my married or committed relationship male friends have tried to sleep with me at one point and it has not been uncommon that they end up sleeping with another female friend of mine. And yes, currently the married man I am involved with is only committed to not being in a committed relationship.
 
2012-04-12 02:59:06 PM

Aidan: umad: You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me

I am in a perfectly fine (AFAIK!) relationship with my husband, we have one kid. I would have absolutely no issue with him having a paternity test. It would not make me feel hurt or betrayed or ANYTHING.

Paternity tests should not be a trust issue. They should just be done. It's no more emotionally draining than blood typing your baby, IMO.


I agree wholeheartedly, but many women do not. Affluent, educated, left-leaning women.

I find it upsetting, but there you are.
 
2012-04-12 02:59:29 PM
i141.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-12 02:59:39 PM

Aidan: umad: You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me

I am in a perfectly fine (AFAIK!) relationship with my husband, we have one kid. I would have absolutely no issue with him having a paternity test. It would not make me feel hurt or betrayed or ANYTHING.

Paternity tests should not be a trust issue.
They should just be done. It's no more emotionally draining than blood typing your baby, IMO.


This is so deeply off-base and broken I am not sure where to begin to dismantle it.

There is no way that a happily married couple who try to have a chile then succeed would ever even CONTEMPLATE opening a discussion on 'paternity test'. By even bringing it up represents a mistrustful nature, ergo, you have already lost trust in the marriage.
 
2012-04-12 03:00:22 PM

KierzanDax: "What can she do for you that I can't?"
"Anal."
She has Parkinson's.


FTFY

/ punchline to an old joke
 
2012-04-12 03:00:34 PM

ph0rk: Because the right course of action there is to (1) tell him to fark off, (2) let the wife know (in writing, not in person), and (3) walk away.


I don't know about 2, but 1 and 3 absolutely.

2 is case-dependent, IMO.
 
2012-04-12 03:02:56 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Nogale: ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.

I used to think the same thing but now I'm not sure. What if the guy has been cheating on his wife for a decade or more and ForMadmenOnly is just the flavor of the month? If he weren't with her, he'd be with someone else.

I'm not some evil chick that goes after married men but I've found that most of my married or committed relationship male friends have tried to sleep with me at one point and it has not been uncommon that they end up sleeping with another female friend of mine. And yes, currently the married man I am involved with is only committed to not being in a committed relationship.


Surely you must see a contradiction here. I'm aware of the possible gray areas in this situation, but if his wife doesn't know and assent, it's NOT any sort of "open relationship" and you're kidding yourself by saying that it is.
 
2012-04-12 03:03:30 PM

ObscureNameHere: There is no way that a happily married couple who try to have a chile then succeed would ever even CONTEMPLATE opening a discussion on 'paternity test'. By even bringing it up represents a mistrustful nature, ergo, you have already lost trust in the marriage.


See?

A woman always knows the maternity of her child. A man can never know with certainty.

That a woman would even contemplate denying this knowledge to a man (from a neutral 3rd party; she is clearly biased), shows severe character flaws.

/I really wish the state mandated paternity tests the first time any man was treated legally as a parent for a given child, would clear this right up.
//Don't want a paternity test taken? Don't put his name on the birth cert and don't ever ask for child support
///I like the idea of mandatory testing all the time better, but most are uncomfortable with this playfield-leveling idea.
 
2012-04-12 03:03:52 PM

umad: ph0rk: Of course, I was told lately that dudes shouldn't ask for paternity tests because it shows lack of trust - whatever.

/I'm still asking for one if the time ever comes.

You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me


How about if the offspring looks, acts, and shares similar genetic quirks as you?

Are you still an idiot then?
 
2012-04-12 03:04:44 PM

Nogale: ForMadmenOnly: Nogale: ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: /currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

Not good enough. Maybe for a drunken one-night stand, but after you've sobered up the only moral thing to do is demand they tell the other woman/break up.

Anything less is despicable, provided the man isn't in an open relationship.

I used to think the same thing but now I'm not sure. What if the guy has been cheating on his wife for a decade or more and ForMadmenOnly is just the flavor of the month? If he weren't with her, he'd be with someone else.

I'm not some evil chick that goes after married men but I've found that most of my married or committed relationship male friends have tried to sleep with me at one point and it has not been uncommon that they end up sleeping with another female friend of mine. And yes, currently the married man I am involved with is only committed to not being in a committed relationship.

Surely you must see a contradiction here. I'm aware of the possible gray areas in this situation, but if his wife doesn't know and assent, it's NOT any sort of "open relationship" and you're kidding yourself by saying that it is.


A person - male or female - being compulsively unfaithful does not mean that he/she is in an "open relationship." A broken one, maybe, but not an open one.
 
2012-04-12 03:05:04 PM

ObscureNameHere: By even bringing it up represents a mistrustful nature, ergo, you have already lost trust in the marriage.


No. Well at least 1 no (me). I don't know how many others, but it's most likely more than 1.

Humans are human. The only reason we got married when we did is because I was insecure. He didn't mind doing that for me to make me feel better. That doesn't mean marriage or lack thereof was a trust issue, it was just a personal issue. Ditto paternity. If he isn't sure, the easiest way to ease his mind is to prove paternity.

Also, communication is (generally) good. Not talking about important shiat like whether or not you doubt your kids are yours... is bad.
 
2012-04-12 03:05:06 PM

FarkLiberty: umad: ph0rk: Of course, I was told lately that dudes shouldn't ask for paternity tests because it shows lack of trust - whatever.

/I'm still asking for one if the time ever comes.

You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me

How about if the offspring looks, acts, and shares similar genetic quirks as you?

Are you still an idiot then?


Why would you wait that long to get a test done?
 
2012-04-12 03:06:46 PM

ph0rk: ForMadmenOnly: Current situation is way too complicated to describe here but it is a sort of open relationship.

"sort of open"?

Sounds like someone is having fun at someone else's expense to me. Unless you'd be perfectly fine in the other woman's shoes, you should walk away.

If you would be perfectly fine, I'm not really sure why your "been on both sides" expertise is worth anything.

This is all predicated on the idea that you don't think of yourself as a me-first, me-only sociopath, of course.


Nope, I wouldn't want to be in here shoes but if I was married I would damn well know ahead of time if my husband wanted an open relationship or not and wouldn't try to avoid the conversation when he tried to have it. Also, I would marry someone just because they knocked me up. I also wouldn't marry someone if I thought they might cheat on me. I have walked away from a cheater but would never have wanted to hear from the other woman and am glad I didn't. Also, I would expect to take vacations by myself to exotic places and not expect my husband to think I was being faithful nor would I think he was being faithful I his own vacations.

/Will never be the unfaithful one again, it just feels dirty.
//Being other woman does not for some reason.
 
2012-04-12 03:08:48 PM

umad: You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me


LOL, Y U NO TRUST ANYBODY?
 
2012-04-12 03:10:09 PM

ph0rk: ObscureNameHere: There is no way that a happily married couple who try to have a chile then succeed would ever even CONTEMPLATE opening a discussion on 'paternity test'. By even bringing it up represents a mistrustful nature, ergo, you have already lost trust in the marriage.

See?

A woman always knows the maternity of her child. A man can never know with certainty.

That a woman would even contemplate denying this knowledge to a man (from a neutral 3rd party; she is clearly biased), shows severe character flaws.

/I really wish the state mandated paternity tests the first time any man was treated legally as a parent for a given child, would clear this right up.
//Don't want a paternity test taken? Don't put his name on the birth cert and don't ever ask for child support
///I like the idea of mandatory testing all the time better, but most are uncomfortable with this playfield-leveling idea.


You must be trolling. Ok, fine, I fell for it.

But I'll play along:
In either case of either of my children, I had absolutely no reason whatsoever to ever contemplate a 'paternity test'. The thought never crossed my mind, ever. Maybe you have never actually been in a good healthy and happy, relationship. Such a ridiculous request would be rightfully met with scorn and tears.

Why? Because even asking indicates that you DO NOT BELIEVE HER WORD.

And if you don't believe her word, then the trust element of the relationship has died.
 
2012-04-12 03:11:08 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Nope, I wouldn't want to be in here shoes but if I was married I would damn well know ahead of time if my husband wanted an open relationship or not and wouldn't try to avoid the conversation when he tried to have it. Also, I would marry someone just because they knocked me up. I also wouldn't marry someone if I thought they might cheat on me. I have walked away from a cheater but would never have wanted to hear from the other woman and am glad I didn't. Also, I would expect to take vacations by myself to exotic places and not expect my husband to think I was being faithful nor would I think he was being faithful I his own vacations.

/Will never be the unfaithful one again, it just feels dirty.
//Being other woman does not for some reason.


What's that about everything before the but?

Anyway - If you wouldn't want to be in her shoes, stop being an asshole.

Offer mitigating circumstances if you want, but you are contributing to assholish activity. Stop it.

For the record, I am reasonably sure the custom isn't for a woman (or a man) to have to ask if their partner wants an open relationship. In most cases, it is safe to assume a closed relationship is the default position. Husband is a jackass for not telling her beforehand. Shocker.

For the record, I'm pro equality, anti-marriage, and think religion is stupid in most cases. However, when the culture has a predominant form of a type of relationship, you're being a dick if you participate in breaking that custom.

Don't be a dick.
 
2012-04-12 03:12:38 PM

Digitalstrange: Lupine Chemist: LeroyBourne: I'd be worried if a girl wanted to move in after 6 weeks. Shiat, 6 months of dating is still a bit quick.

I'm planning on getting a place with the girl after 6 months and we both feel it's incredibly fast. Only doing it because things are working so well.

If you are really compatible then 2 days isn't too soon, and if you aren't then waiting 6 years to try it won't help. Pretty much the logical decision point is when you are spending 4 nights a week or more together for over a month straight. If that feels good and you want more then it's time to take the step forward. If you aren't looking forward to more time then it's time to consider moving on.


This....this is excellent advice. Thank you, internet man.
 
2012-04-12 03:14:19 PM
The friend who suggested to "test him" definitely had a crush on the guy. She was just hoping she would be the one asked to do it.
 
2012-04-12 03:15:53 PM

ObscureNameHere: And if you don't believe her word, then the trust element of the relationship has died.


the current legal situation is one where to trust her at first would put you on the hook for 18 years in a real, inescapable, even-with-contradictory-paternity-test outcomes. To support a kid and act as father at first can lock you in to "acting" as a father for the kid's entire childhood, no matter the test results.

Why should she choose this point, of all points, to dig in her heels and be a jackass?

I don't watch her all the time. She clearly has nothing to hide. What's the problem?

/This is exactly why I think it is a great idea for the state to mandate testing for things like putting a man's name on the birth certificate or applying for child support.
 
2012-04-12 03:19:28 PM
Do you guys know what paranoia means?

par·a·noi·a/ˌparəˈnoiə/
Noun:
1. A mental condition characterized by delusions of persecution, unwarranted jealousy, or exaggerated self-importance, typically worked...
2. Suspicion and mistrust of people or their actions without evidence or justification.


She heard a voice mail message from a woman "saying how she loved him and calling him sexy." That's PLENTY of justification for not trusting him. And seeing how he later admitted that the message was from a woman he was cheating with, it sure as hell wasn't "unwarranted."
 
2012-04-12 03:19:40 PM

FarkLiberty: umad: ph0rk: Of course, I was told lately that dudes shouldn't ask for paternity tests because it shows lack of trust - whatever.

/I'm still asking for one if the time ever comes.

You are an idiot if you don't get one.

/Yes, that includes you Mr. I-trust-my-wife-and-she-would-never-cheat-on-me

How about if the offspring looks, acts, and shares similar genetic quirks as you?

Are you still an idiot then?


You are already farked by then. If your name is on the birth certificate and you have been "acting as the father" there is no going back. The courts don't care that it isn't actually your kid.
 
2012-04-12 03:21:46 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Having been on all sides of the cheating situation (the cheater, the cheated and the other woman) I like to think I have a good idea of what goes wrong. Usually it is lack of sex/affection. If two people don't have similar sex drives a monogamous relationship most likely wont work. Or, the relationship has already died and the two people have drifted away from each other emotionally. People at this point seem to stay together for comfort; they're unhappy but it's not that bad sort of deal or they stay together for kid/s.

/currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible


You're right on the money. I say this from experience.
 
2012-04-12 03:24:25 PM
So she set the trap.......and he got sprung.
 
2012-04-12 03:26:03 PM
What's that about everything before the but?

Anyway - If you wouldn't want to be in her shoes, stop being an asshole.

Offer mitigating circumstances if you want, but you are contributing to assholish activity. Stop it.

For the record, I am reasonably sure the custom isn't for a woman (or a man) to have to ask if their partner wants an open relationship. In most cases, it is safe to assume a closed relationship is the default position. Husband is a jackass for not telling her beforehand. Shocker.

For the record, I'm pro equality, anti-marriage, and think religion is stupid in most cases. However, when the culture has a predominant form of a type of relationship, you're being a dick if you participate in breaking that custom.

Don't be a dick.


It's weird because I am also anti-marriage and am actually a non anti-religion atheist (I don't hold religion against people) and grew up in a household where the man of the house and the woman of the house were 50/50 all the way. Overall I do not think that stepping out on someone is acceptable but ever since I did cheat I can understand how it happens. In my case the relationship had died long ago. I did however see how what I was doing was wrong and broke the relationship off because it was not fair to my boyfriend. What I did/do was/is wrong. That doesn't mean I am accountable for everything. I wish the man would leave his wife. But not to be with me, I don't want that. He has tried to have the conversation with his wife about the terms of their relationship and she wont have it. If she doesn't want to even face the reality of what may be happening that's her problem and she shouldn't have married a man she didn't love because he knocked her up. I don't expect to get anyone's approval for what I'm doing or expect why I do it to make sense. The question to me is this; is a forced loveless relationship bound by the same "rules?" I open to be swayed one way or the other.
 
2012-04-12 03:28:12 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: ForMadmenOnly: Having been on all sides of the cheating situation (the cheater, the cheated and the other woman) I like to think I have a good idea of what goes wrong. Usually it is lack of sex/affection. If two people don't have similar sex drives a monogamous relationship most likely wont work. Or, the relationship has already died and the two people have drifted away from each other emotionally. People at this point seem to stay together for comfort; they're unhappy but it's not that bad sort of deal or they stay together for kid/s.

/currently the other woman
//I know, I know, I'm horrible

You're right on the money. I say this from experience.


This is not a conversation I can just openly have with people so it's actually interesting to see what people have to say on both sides.
 
2012-04-12 03:30:04 PM

ForMadmenOnly: Current situation is way too complicated to describe here but it is a sort of open relationship.


8.5/10
 
2012-04-12 03:33:09 PM
Wow, my first troll points on fark! When I posted I gave myself a 90% chance of being told I was so I guess you win or something.
 
2012-04-12 03:33:41 PM

umad: You are already farked by then. If your name is on the birth certificate and you have been "acting as the father" there is no going back. The courts don't care that it isn't actually your kid.


So once your name is on the paper you're screwed? Or is there a reasonable time frame in which you can contest it?

/Didn't get my GED in law...
 
2012-04-12 03:41:13 PM

ForMadmenOnly: The question to me is this; is a forced loveless relationship bound by the same "rules?" I open to be swayed one way or the other.


This just reads like justification to me.

You said you wouldn't want to be in her shoes - that should be pretty much it.

I couldn't willfully cross that line and still think of myself as a decent person. I expect others to hold themselves to the same standard. It doesn't really seem like that high a bar - don't be a hypocrite.
 
2012-04-12 03:41:30 PM

ph0rk: ObscureNameHere: And if you don't believe her word, then the trust element of the relationship has died.

the current legal situation is one where to trust her at first would put you on the hook for 18 years in a real, inescapable, even-with-contradictory-paternity-test outcomes. To support a kid and act as father at first can lock you in to "acting" as a father for the kid's entire childhood, no matter the test results.

Why should she choose this point, of all points, to dig in her heels and be a jackass?

I don't watch her all the time. She clearly has nothing to hide. What's the problem?

/This is exactly why I think it is a great idea for the state to mandate testing for things like putting a man's name on the birth certificate or applying for child support.


*blink*
Wow, we both appear to be typing in English, yet seem to be speaking entirely different languages. Eerie.
 
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