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(Deadline)   Sabrina the Teenage Witch getting big-screen reboot with "edgier" origin story "in the vein of Spider-Man"   (deadline.com ) divider line
    More: Silly, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Spider-Man, pictures, Archie Comics, Melissa Joan Hart, Real Steel, Amy Pascal, origin story  
•       •       •

4408 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Apr 2012 at 3:24 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-11 11:42:43 PM  
A edgy movie about a teen witch?
content7.flixster.com
It'll be hard to top that.
 
2012-04-12 12:24:19 AM  

i66.photobucket.com
Sweet lord, I'm back

 
2012-04-12 12:32:12 AM  
How can it be rebooted on the big screen, if it never booted the first time?

/what is the sound of one hand fapping?
//why do they call them 'buildings' when they're complete? we should call them 'builts!'
 
2012-04-12 12:48:54 AM  
Next: Clarissa Actually Explains Something For Once.
 
2012-04-12 01:08:27 AM  
So, exactly when did Hollywood run out of new ideas and have to start remaking everything?

And how long until the Dark, Edgy, rastafied by 10% Manimal and Supertrain reboots? And hey, since Glee and Smash are successful, where's Cop Rock 2012?
 
2012-04-12 01:11:46 AM  
Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.
 
2012-04-12 01:14:31 AM  

farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.


Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.
 
2012-04-12 03:26:01 AM  
I'm hoping for demonic possession and baby sacrifice.
 
2012-04-12 03:30:44 AM  
So it's Sabrina for teenage boys boys boys?
 
2012-04-12 03:36:00 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.

Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.


That's the idea behind NCIS.
 
2012-04-12 03:36:13 AM  
Well if nobody else is going to...

images5.fanpop.com
www.hothotwallpapers.com
www.starfetch.com
www.perfectpeople.net
www.famous-people-search.com
uknet.com
 
2012-04-12 03:41:48 AM  

Cyno01: Well if nobody else is going to...


I sign her yearbook, if you know what I'm referencing and I think you do.
 
2012-04-12 03:43:48 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: So, exactly when did Hollywood run out of new ideas and have to start remaking everything?


About 1933 or so. Then they cut it out for a while until the 80s, then it started escalating again.

For instance, there are like 12 Wizard of Oz movies.
 
2012-04-12 03:44:45 AM  
That lazy eye really gives her a sultry look.
 
2012-04-12 03:54:47 AM  

Suede head: That lazy eye really gives her a sultry look.


Wait, wha.. oh yeah she has eyes in those pics.

I'd still invite her to my witch trials if you know what I mean.
 
2012-04-12 03:57:00 AM  

wildcardjack: FirstNationalBastard: farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.

Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.

That's the idea behind NCIS.


I thought that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was The Goddamned Batman.
 
2012-04-12 04:02:20 AM  
suckonhoneysuckle.files.wordpress.com
I'd John Hancock it.
 
2012-04-12 04:09:26 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: wildcardjack: FirstNationalBastard: farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.

Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.

That's the idea behind NCIS.

I thought that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was The Goddamned Batman.


Actually he was Superman in one or two of the new animated movies.
 
2012-04-12 04:12:21 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: So, exactly when did Hollywood run out of new ideas and have to start remaking everything?

And how long until the Dark, Edgy, rastafied by 10% Manimal and Supertrain reboots? And hey, since Glee and Smash are successful, where's Cop Rock 2012?


That's if we're lucky. Hollywood knows they can just release every marginally popular film in 3D and make a killing off of it.
 
2012-04-12 04:56:35 AM  

TXTitan2001: FirstNationalBastard: wildcardjack: FirstNationalBastard: farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.

Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.

That's the idea behind NCIS.

I thought that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was The Goddamned Batman.

Actually he was Superman in one or two of the new animated movies.


Yep, he did the voice of Superman in Crisis on Two Earths
Link (new window)
 
2012-04-12 05:01:27 AM  
"Edgy" is Hollywood-speak for "we have no idea how to do something that is
truly original or creative".
 
2012-04-12 05:02:01 AM  

CSM101: TXTitan2001: FirstNationalBastard: wildcardjack: FirstNationalBastard: farkingismybusiness: Just wait for the dark and edgy Power Rangers movie due out in 2016.

Don't forget the upcoming Mister Rogers reboot, where he actually does start out as a Marine Sniper, only from the Afghanistan war instead of Vietnam.

That's the idea behind NCIS.

I thought that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was The Goddamned Batman.

Actually he was Superman in one or two of the new animated movies.

Yep, he did the voice of Superman in Crisis on Two Earths
Link (new window)


Mark Harmon doesn't strike me as Superman.

Beside the fact that Gibbs is Batman, Harmon's voice would lend itself to Batman much better than Superman.
 
2012-04-12 06:48:50 AM  
I could see something like this working, though it is a bit hard to avoid any Harry Potter tropes. Actually, pretty hard to.

(I liked the show when I was 12, but then again what 12 year old has taste.)

You could have her living a normal life with her parents, not knowing she is a witch, as her parents want to keep up normal appearances as they are in hiding from some bad warlock who the parents pissed off. Parents get murdered, she is shipped to live with her two sexy blonde aunts, who have a sassy cat (no cgi on the cat. Puppet all the way).

Then make the rest of the movie the cat wisecracking.
 
2012-04-12 07:03:02 AM  
Hey great, another origin story. It's like no one can write anything other than a by-the-numbers hero's journey and I wonder if the audience could actually handle it if someone did.
 
2012-04-12 07:09:57 AM  

Cyno01: Well if nobody else is going to...

[images5.fanpop.com image 640x480]
[www.hothotwallpapers.com image 488x366]
[www.starfetch.com image 640x480]
[www.perfectpeople.net image 640x860]
[www.famous-people-search.com image 640x910]
[uknet.com image 503x640]


"OK Melissa, in this photo shoot, we need your face to have an expression similar to someone who's in the middle of a 3 day meth and Zima binge. Can you do....oh, that's perfect! How did you nail that look so quickly, you're a natural!"
"...Uh, yeah....a natural....sure thing!"
 
2012-04-12 07:15:55 AM  
Can't wait - will this reboot require anal lube?
 
2012-04-12 07:28:33 AM  
"While the tone of the movie will be edgier, they are keeping her talking black cat Salem, who here is a transformed prince creating unique love stories for Sabrina."

Sabrina will be petting her pussy in a salacious manner? Rowr.
 
2012-04-12 07:48:22 AM  

Cyno01: Well if nobody else is going to...


Thank you. BBIAB. Bunk time.

//She's actually gotten hotter since then
 
2012-04-12 07:53:49 AM  
"We mentioned it in a meeting to Amy Pascal who chimed in "I'm the little witch girl,'" Murphy and Montford said. "From then on we knew it was the right home."

WAT?
 
2012-04-12 07:57:44 AM  
Sabrina The Teenage Witch was already rebooted with Melissa Joan Hart.

/get off my lawn
 
2012-04-12 08:01:03 AM  
I could reboot some Josie & the Pussycats, if you know what I mean, and I think you do
 
2012-04-12 08:31:40 AM  
Will she get "biz-ay" consistently and thoroughly?
 
2012-04-12 08:45:10 AM  
I wouldn't mind seeing Nick Bakay get some work again.
 
2012-04-12 08:46:05 AM  

Cyno01: Well if nobody else is going to...

[images5.fanpop.com image 640x480]
[www.hothotwallpapers.com image 488x366]
[www.starfetch.com image 640x480]
[www.perfectpeople.net image 640x860]
[www.famous-people-search.com image 640x910]
[uknet.com image 503x640]


She was cute way back in Clarissa, but she was never sexy.
 
2012-04-12 08:47:14 AM  
Both her aunts gets stabbed through the head with pitchforks by the lynch mob consisting of teachers and students from school. She is betrayed by her boyfriend, who's the school jock. But just before she gets gang raped by her boyfriend's football team, he takes pity on her so he burns her alive so that she doesn't get raped.

And they lived happily ever after.

THE END

/edgier(?)
 
2012-04-12 08:54:24 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: So, exactly when did Hollywood run out of new ideas and have to start remaking everything?


Say about the 1950's; but they've gone up in volume in the last 25 years.

And how long until the Dark, Edgy, rastafied by 10% Manimal and Supertrain reboots? And hey, since Glee and Smash are successful, where's Cop Rock 2012?

I'm guessing since WB/DC owns the rights to Zatanna and Marvel is in no way going to part with the rights to Dr. Strange, Sony went for option C.
 
2012-04-12 08:55:36 AM  

Aboleth: Both her aunts gets stabbed through the head with pitchforks by the lynch mob consisting of teachers and students from school. She is betrayed by her boyfriend, who's the school jock. But just before she gets gang raped by her boyfriend's football team, he takes pity on her so he burns her alive so that she doesn't get raped.

And they lived happily ever after.

THE END

/edgier(?)


That would've been the Carrie remake.
 
2012-04-12 08:59:08 AM  

Teknowaffle: I could see something like this working, though it is a bit hard to avoid any Harry Potter tropes. Actually, pretty hard to.

(I liked the show when I was 12, but then again what 12 year old has taste.)

You could have her living a normal life with her parents, not knowing she is a witch, as her parents want to keep up normal appearances as they are in hiding from some bad warlock who the parents pissed off. Parents get murdered, she is shipped to live with her two sexy blonde aunts, who have a sassy cat (no cgi on the cat. Puppet all the way).

Then make the rest of the movie the cat wisecracking.


If they can't get Nick Bakay to be the voice of Salem, don't even bother with it.
 
2012-04-12 09:17:49 AM  

Suede head: That lazy eye really gives her a sultry look.


I was waiting for this. Every time someone mentions the lazy eye I think they must have looked really hard to find something to hate her for. Kinda like Megan Fox's "toe thumbs".

Who notices that stuff?
 
2012-04-12 09:18:55 AM  
Ok Melissa, I need you do to your best Cybill Shepherd imitation, of cybil at 50.

pics.hollywoodrag.com
 
2012-04-12 09:27:19 AM  
So it's going to be another Twilight clone?

Great.
 
2012-04-12 09:31:58 AM  

theflatline: Ok Melissa, I need you do to your best Cybill Shepherd imitation, of cybil at 50.


Melissa Joan Hart is always going to be one of those women who manages to still confuse gay men about their sexuality.
 
2012-04-12 09:32:01 AM  

DjangoStonereaver: "Edgy" is Hollywood-speak for "we have no idea how to do something that is
truly original or creative".


More like, "We're going to shoot this with a minimum of lighting and call it dark and brooding"
 
2012-04-12 09:34:59 AM  
Is she going to be bitten by a radioactive witch?
 
2012-04-12 09:35:53 AM  
A couple for the nerds:

www.crackteam.org
www.wired.com
 
2012-04-12 09:38:34 AM  

Xythero: "We mentioned it in a meeting to Amy Pascal who chimed in "I'm the little witch girl,'" Murphy and Montford said. "From then on we knew it was the right home."

WAT?



That definitely merited a "What the fark am I reading?" pic.
 
2012-04-12 09:42:19 AM  
So they're remaking "The Craft"?
 
2012-04-12 09:54:15 AM  
moonlitgarden.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-04-12 10:16:12 AM  

sprawl15: Is she going to be bitten by a radioactive witch?


Ok, that was pretty funny. I actually LOL'd.

Persnickety

Thanks for those man!

/Like many on FARK, had a crush on MJH since 1992 or so
//Had a crush on Courtney Thorne-Smith since 1989 or so
///Think I'll start a CTS thread someday
 
2012-04-12 10:19:37 AM  

Aboleth: Both her aunts gets stabbed through the head with pitchforks by the lynch mob consisting of teachers and students from school. She is betrayed by her boyfriend, who's the school jock. But just before she gets gang raped by her boyfriend's football team, he takes pity on her so he burns her alive so that she doesn't get raped.

And they lived happily ever after.

THE END

/edgier(?)


Maybe she uses her powers to trick the football team into raping her betraying boyfriend. Turn off the spell the next day when the video they made gang raping their team mate is found by a teacher. When you have powers why would you ever get burned at the stake?
 
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