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(Fark)   Have you made someone smile today?   (fark.com ) divider line
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7567 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Apr 2012 at 9:54 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-10 11:05:52 AM  

ComicBookGuy: No Pinkamena Diane Pie? :C


Don't give anybody ideas!!!

Or is it too late now?
 
2012-04-10 11:10:44 AM  

miss diminutive: BurnShrike: Does it count even if no one pressed the Funny button?

I keep telling you...that's not a funny button, it's a clitoris. I'm happy you finally found it and all but it's not a Pez dispenser.


Ok, that was several kinds of awesome.
 
2012-04-10 11:11:52 AM  
Taikoluigi: ComicBookGuy: No Pinkamena Diane Pie? :C

Don't give anybody ideas!!!

Or is it too late now?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNrXMOSkBas&feature=youtube_gdata_play e r
 
2012-04-10 11:15:56 AM  
MontyBurns:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNrXMOSkBas&feature=you tube_gdata_play e r

Yep, too late.
 
2012-04-10 11:16:48 AM  

BusketsMcBride: You made me frown by greening this.


You just made me smile. :)
 
2012-04-10 11:19:29 AM  
Just got off teh phone with a happy customer.
She started the call off telling me I had a radio voice.
I told her, yes, but I also have a radio face.
Set the tone for a tought tech support call that had her smiling all the way through anyway.
 
2012-04-10 11:19:51 AM  
images.travelpod.com
 
2012-04-10 11:20:54 AM  

Optimus Primate: The sheer weight of it, hanging there like a wiry-haired mutant gnome's arm . . .


"Wiry-haired"? You have a hairy penis?

Do you have to shave it before a date? I shudder to think what a couple days' stubble would feel like to a woman down there.
 
2012-04-10 11:22:45 AM  

HST's Dead Carcass: Balchinian: You know what would make me smile?

If the mods would keep this TFD crap in the TFD dumpster where it belongs.

Hahahaha! Sucks to be you! You get for free what we normally pay for and you get all butt hurt about it. Hahahaha!


No, it sucks to be you. The whole point is that I don't want what you are paying for. I deliberately do not pay for TF precisely because I do not want it. The whole concept of TF is "this way to the great egress" anyway, and most of you are too blind or too caught up in yourselves to figure that out. Would you buy a newspaper or magazine if it were full of every single thing that got submitted to it? Maybe, but probably not. The value is in the fact that the crap has been filtered out. You don't have to read the rantings of the obsessed cat lady who writes 12 letters to the editor every day, or the illiterate lunatic who went off his meds last week. You don't get innundated with ads soliciting financial asistance for developing perpetual energy machines. You don't have to wade through 35 articles making fun of a celebrity blunder to find the one that is actually humorous and well-written. All the good stuff is pulled out and put in one spot where you can have it neatly and easily available. If you want cream and cream is free, why would you pay for a bucket of raw milk only to have to skim off the cream yourself??

And butthurt? Because someone tells you that he doesn't like the same thing as you, that makes him butthurt? Heh...did you learn that in TFD? :) On the contrary, I am very happy getting Lite for free because given the choice between TF and Lite I would gladly pay $5 a month for Lite. It is the TFers who ought to be butthurt, IMO. They are paying to do a job that most website admins get paid to do...go through all the crap that gets submitted and figure out what isn't fit for the main page. Oh, I know you don't get the final say, but you do all the bleak part of the job and make the final decision easy with the upvoting feature. It is a brilliant maneuver on Drew's part, to actually have pulled off getting paid by his own preliminary editing staff. That said however, when a TF thread does leak its way into Lite, I do get a little annoyed. It is like finding a hair in my food. Not really all that big a deal, but that doesn't mean I am not still going to complain to the waiter, and/or tell the people at the next table that they should keep an eye on their own plates. And don't get me wrong, I understand that dropping a TF turd into Lite now and again is done purposefully for the purposes of recruitment and promotion. But that doesn't mean I have to like it when it happens, and it doesn't mean that I have to keep my mouth shut about it. This isn't Fight Club, and people are free here to not like TF and to say why that is. I am very certain that if Drew had a problem with me saying something he'd ask me to stop, and if he doesn't have a problem with it why should you? Not everybody likes the same things as you, and when they tell you so it isn't necessarily because they are butthurt. This may be news to you, but sometimes when a guy expresses an opinion it isn't about himself at all.
 
2012-04-10 11:24:28 AM  
Taikoluigi: MontyBurns:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNrXMOSkBas&feature=you tube_gdata_play e r

Yep, too late.


20% too late, I reckon.
 
2012-04-10 11:26:15 AM  

Balchinian: No, it sucks to be you. The whole point is that I don't want what you are paying for. I deliberately do not pay for TF precisely because I do not want it. The whole concept of TF is "this way to the great egress" anyway, and most of you are too blind or too caught up in yourselves to figure that out. Would you buy a newspaper or magazine if it were full of every single thing that got submitted to it? Maybe, but probably not. The value is in the fact that the crap has been filtered out. You don't have to read the rantings of the obsessed cat lady who writes 12 letters to the editor every day, or the illiterate lunatic who went off his meds last week. You don't get innundated with ads soliciting financial asistance for developing perpetual energy machines. You don't have to wade through 35 articles making fun of a celebrity blunder to find the one that is actually humorous and well-written. All the good stuff is pulled out and put in one spot where you can have it neatly and easily available. If you want cream and cream is free, why would you pay for a bucket of raw milk only to have to skim off the cream yourself??

And butthurt? Because someone tells you that he doesn't like the same thing as you, that makes him butthurt? Heh...did you learn that in TFD? :) On the contrary, I am very happy getting Lite for free because given the choice between TF and Lite I would gladly pay $5 a month for Lite. It is the TFers who ought to be butthurt, IMO. They are paying to do a job that most website admins get paid to do...go through all the crap that gets submitted and figure out what isn't fit for the main page. Oh, I know you don't get the final say, but you do all the bleak part of the job and make the final decision easy with the upvoting feature. It is a brilliant maneuver on Drew's part, to actually have pulled off getting paid by his own preliminary editing staff. That said however, when a TF thread does leak its way into Lite, I do get a little annoyed. It is like finding a hair in my food. Not really all that big a deal, but that doesn't mean I am not still going to complain to the waiter, and/or tell the people at the next table that they should keep an eye on their own plates. And don't get me wrong, I understand that dropping a TF turd into Lite now and again is done purposefully for the purposes of recruitment and promotion. But that doesn't mean I have to like it when it happens, and it doesn't mean that I have to keep my mouth shut about it. This isn't Fight Club, and people are free here to not like TF and to say why that is. I am very certain that if Drew had a problem with me saying something he'd ask me to stop, and if he doesn't have a problem with it why should you? Not everybody likes the same things as you, and when they tell you so it isn't necessarily because they are butthurt. This may be news to you, but sometimes when a guy expresses an opinion it isn't about himself at all.


You seem very unhappy, and willing to go to great lengths to explain why. Perhaps you should see a psychologist. But, I'm willing to bet you won't pay to talk to someone when you can do it free on the interwebs, amirite?
 
2012-04-10 11:26:27 AM  

vudukungfu: Just got off teh phone with a happy customer.
She started the call off telling me I had a radio voice.
I told her, yes, but I also have a radio face.
Set the tone for a tought tech support call that had her smiling all the way through anyway.


Oh, good thing you told us you did tech support at the end. For a minute I thought you worked in phone sex.

/Or is that just a hobby?
 
2012-04-10 11:27:45 AM  

Balchinian: No, it sucks to be you. The whole point is that I don't want what you are paying for. I deliberately do not pay for TF precisely because I do not want it. The whole concept of TF is "this way to the great egress" anyway, and most of you are too blind or too caught up in yourselves to figure that out. Would you buy a newspaper or magazine if it were full of every single thing that got submitted to it? Maybe, but probably not. The value is in the fact that the crap has been filtered out. You don't have to read the rantings of the obsessed cat lady who writes 12 letters to the editor every day, or the illiterate lunatic who went off his meds last week. You don't get innundated with ads soliciting financial asistance for developing perpetual energy machines. You don't have to wade through 35 articles making fun of a celebrity blunder to find the one that is actually humorous and well-written. All the good stuff is pulled out and put in one spot where you can have it neatly and easily available. If you want cream and cream is free, why would you pay for a bucket of raw milk only to have to skim off the cream yourself??

And butthurt? Because someone tells you that he doesn't like the same thing as you, that makes him butthurt? Heh...did you learn that in TFD? :) On the contrary, I am very happy getting Lite for free because given the choice between TF and Lite I would gladly pay $5 a month for Lite. It is the TFers who ought to be butthurt, IMO. They are paying to do a job that most website admins get paid to do...go through all the crap that gets submitted and figure out what isn't fit for the main page. Oh, I know you don't get the final say, but you do all the bleak part of the job and make the final decision easy with the upvoting feature. It is a brilliant maneuver on Drew's part, to actually have pulled off getting paid by his own preliminary editing staff. That said however, when a TF thread does leak its way into Lite, I do get a little annoyed. It is like finding a hair in my food. Not really all that big a deal, but that doesn't mean I am not still going to complain to the waiter, and/or tell the people at the next table that they should keep an eye on their own plates. And don't get me wrong, I understand that dropping a TF turd into Lite now and again is done purposefully for the purposes of recruitment and promotion. But that doesn't mean I have to like it when it happens, and it doesn't mean that I have to keep my mouth shut about it. This isn't Fight Club, and people are free here to not like TF and to say why that is. I am very certain that if Drew had a problem with me saying something he'd ask me to stop, and if he doesn't have a problem with it why should you? Not everybody likes the same things as you, and when they tell you so it isn't necessarily because they are butthurt. This may be news to you, but sometimes when a guy expresses an opinion it isn't about himself at all.


:)
 
2012-04-10 11:28:15 AM  
Yes I have. And I enjoyed it greatly. She did too.

(imagination - you have it, use it)
 
2012-04-10 11:28:45 AM  

Balchinian: And butthurt? Because someone tells you that he doesn't like the same thing as you, that makes him butthurt?


Holy Jose! Are you actually thinking that you don't sound super-duper butthurt now?
 
2012-04-10 11:30:54 AM  
tjsullivan.com
 
2012-04-10 11:34:24 AM  

trappedspirit: Holy Jose! Are you actually thinking that you don't sound super-duper butthurt now?


Shhh, he's working through some issues.
 
2012-04-10 11:34:25 AM  
Is this some sort of strange innuendo I'm not aware of?

I shan't stand for this!

I SHAN'T!

Good Day, Sir.

I SAID GOOD DAY!
 
2012-04-10 11:36:06 AM  
KierzanDax

Is this some sort of strange innuendo I'm not aware of?


INYOURENDO, amirite?
 
2012-04-10 11:36:31 AM  

Al_Ed: LlamaGirl: Al_Ed: Not yet...but the day is young, my penis short.

Mine is HUGE this morning.

Huge.

Morning wood is the best.


It´s way better than Awkward Standing Up On Public Transport Wood.
 
2012-04-10 11:37:24 AM  

Balchinian: HST's Dead Carcass: Balchinian: You know what would make me smile?

If the mods would keep this TFD crap in the TFD dumpster where it belongs.

Hahahaha! Sucks to be you! You get for free what we normally pay for and you get all butt hurt about it. Hahahaha!

No, it sucks to be you. The whole point is that I don't want what you are paying for. I deliberately do not pay for TF precisely because I do not want it. The whole concept of TF is "this way to the great egress" anyway, and most of you are too blind or too caught up in yourselves to figure that out. Would you buy a newspaper or magazine if it were full of every single thing that got submitted to it? Maybe, but probably not. The value is in the fact that the crap has been filtered out. You don't have to read the rantings of the obsessed cat lady who writes 12 letters to the editor every day, or the illiterate lunatic who went off his meds last week. You don't get innundated with ads soliciting financial asistance for developing perpetual energy machines. You don't have to wade through 35 articles making fun of a celebrity blunder to find the one that is actually humorous and well-written. All the good stuff is pulled out and put in one spot where you can have it neatly and easily available. If you want cream and cream is free, why would you pay for a bucket of raw milk only to have to skim off the cream yourself??

And butthurt? Because someone tells you that he doesn't like the same thing as you, that makes him butthurt? Heh...did you learn that in TFD? :) On the contrary, I am very happy getting Lite for free because given the choice between TF and Lite I would gladly pay $5 a month for Lite. It is the TFers who ought to be butthurt, IMO. They are paying to do a job that most website admins get paid to do...go through all the crap that gets submitted and figure out what isn't fit for the main page. Oh, I know you don't get the final say, but you do all the bleak part of the job and make th ...


Can you come to my next party? You seem fun.
 
2012-04-10 11:42:15 AM  

Iggymac: Al_Ed: LlamaGirl: Al_Ed: Not yet...but the day is young, my penis short.

Mine is HUGE this morning.

Huge.

Morning wood is the best.

It´s way better than Awkward Standing Up On Public Transport Wood.


That's why you do the pocket trick. You know that one, right?

Just in case, just reach into your pocket and flip that business up behind your waistband/belt. It'll take care of itself from there.

CSB: Years ago, a co-worker asked me how I deal with that phenomenon. I gave her the above description and she was bewildered. So she asked me to demonstrate. I was happy to show her how and she got a kick out of it. Also, she was pretty hot, so it was easy to set up the circumstances necessary to perform the trick.
 
2012-04-10 11:44:38 AM  
farm4.staticflickr.com
 
2012-04-10 11:48:23 AM  

HST's Dead Carcass:
You seem very unhappy, and willing to go to great lengths to explain why. Perhaps you should see a psychologist. But, I'm willing to bet you won't pay to talk to someone when you can do it free on the interwebs, amirite?


Well, that is the thing about appearances. They can be deceiving. What "seems" to you to be the case can actually be something quite different in reality. In reality, I am a retired psychologist. And very happy, thanks.


trappedspirit: Holy Jose! Are you actually thinking that you don't sound super-duper butthurt now?


"Sounds like"? See above comment to HST regarding appearances being deceiving.

myschief: Can you come to my next party? You seem fun.


Possibly. Will you pay me $5?
 
2012-04-10 11:49:42 AM  

Balchinian: HST's Dead Carcass:
You seem very unhappy, and willing to go to great lengths to explain why. Perhaps you should see a psychologist. But, I'm willing to bet you won't pay to talk to someone when you can do it free on the interwebs, amirite?

Well, that is the thing about appearances. They can be deceiving. What "seems" to you to be the case can actually be something quite different in reality. In reality, I am a retired psychologist. And very happy, thanks.


trappedspirit: Holy Jose! Are you actually thinking that you don't sound super-duper butthurt now?

"Sounds like"? See above comment to HST regarding appearances being deceiving.

myschief: Can you come to my next party? You seem fun.

Possibly. Will you pay me $5?


$5 is a pretty damn steep investment. I'll have to consider it.
 
2012-04-10 11:51:44 AM  

Balchinian: Well, that is the thing about appearances. They can be deceiving. What "seems" to you to be the case can actually be something quite different in reality. In reality, I am a retired psychologist. And very happy, thanks.


In my experience, psychologists have the worst relationships and tend to be very angry from their former jobs of listening to people whine and biatch all day and not doing anything about all their whining and biatching.

I'm glad to see you proved me... nevermind...
 
2012-04-10 11:52:06 AM  
i242.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-10 11:54:40 AM  

MoronLessOff: Just in case, just reach into your pocket and flip that business up behind your waistband/belt. It'll take care of itself from there.

CSB: Years ago, a co-worker asked me how I deal with that phenomenon. I gave her the above description and she was bewildered. So she asked me to demonstrate. I was happy to show her how and she got a kick out of it. Also, she was pretty hot, so it was easy to set up the circumstances necessary to perform the trick.


We call that "The Windmill". From 6 to Midnight in one smooth motion.
 
2012-04-10 11:55:55 AM  

Balchinian: trappedspirit: Holy Jose! Are you actually thinking that you don't sound super-duper butthurt now?

"Sounds like"? See above comment to HST regarding appearances being deceiving.


The lady doth protest too much, methinks.
 
2012-04-10 11:57:40 AM  

Balchinian: Possibly. Will you pay me $5?


good luck. we're all counting on you.
 
2012-04-10 11:57:52 AM  

Crackers Are a Family Food: dj_spanmaster: As it happens, I love making people smile, especially at work. I say humorous, witty things. I bring jelly-filled donuts. I tickle them on the love handles.

I am a Farker.

*nods* Feels weird because, well, I'm a Farker, but I love making people happy. This world is so hurried, stressed, and depressed - one nice gesture can make someone's day. I love doing that.


Yes, but doing all of those nice gestures that I do at once makes everyone laugh coffee out their nose, which in turn makes me laugh too. See, it's a selfish thing, in a roundabout way.
 
2012-04-10 11:58:31 AM  

headstone: good luck. we're all counting on you.


YAY! You rock!
 
2012-04-10 12:01:35 PM  

dj_spanmaster: Crackers Are a Family Food: dj_spanmaster: As it happens, I love making people smile, especially at work. I say humorous, witty things. I bring jelly-filled donuts. I tickle them on the love handles.

I am a Farker.

*nods* Feels weird because, well, I'm a Farker, but I love making people happy. This world is so hurried, stressed, and depressed - one nice gesture can make someone's day. I love doing that.

Yes, but doing all of those nice gestures that I do at once makes everyone laugh coffee out their nose, which in turn makes me laugh too. See, it's a selfish thing, in a roundabout way.


farm4.staticflickr.com
 
2012-04-10 12:02:01 PM  

Time Traveling Bunnies: MoronLessOff: Just in case, just reach into your pocket and flip that business up behind your waistband/belt. It'll take care of itself from there.

CSB: Years ago, a co-worker asked me how I deal with that phenomenon. I gave her the above description and she was bewildered. So she asked me to demonstrate. I was happy to show her how and she got a kick out of it. Also, she was pretty hot, so it was easy to set up the circumstances necessary to perform the trick.

We call that "The Windmill". From 6 to Midnight in one smooth motion.


I like the description, but the name sounds too much like another one of my moves, "The Helicopter". Except that one involves a lot of hip swinging. I guess "The Propeller" would be a better name.
 
2012-04-10 12:03:17 PM  

MoronLessOff: CSB: Years ago, a co-worker asked me how I deal with that phenomenon. I gave her the above description and she was bewildered. So she asked me to demonstrate. I was happy to show her how and she got a kick out of it. Also, she was pretty hot, so it was easy to set up the circumstances necessary to perform the trick.


So does that story end with her alleviating your discomfort or filing a sexual harassment claim?
 
2012-04-10 12:04:25 PM  
i281.photobucket.com
 
2012-04-10 12:07:25 PM  

Donnchadha: MoronLessOff: CSB: Years ago, a co-worker asked me how I deal with that phenomenon. I gave her the above description and she was bewildered. So she asked me to demonstrate. I was happy to show her how and she got a kick out of it. Also, she was pretty hot, so it was easy to set up the circumstances necessary to perform the trick.

So does that story end with her alleviating your discomfort or filing a sexual harassment claim?


Sadly, neither. But I would have been fine with either outcome.
/outcome
 
2012-04-10 12:07:27 PM  

HST's Dead Carcass: headstone: good luck. we're all counting on you.

YAY! You rock!


well, he/she actually sounded...happy. i couldn't let that continue, could i?


actually, Balchinian has the potential to be a great addition to TF, if he/she'd just relax into it...
 
2012-04-10 12:09:30 PM  

headstone: well, he/she actually sounded...happy. i couldn't let that continue, could i?


actually, Balchinian has the potential to be a great addition to TF, if he/she'd just relax into it...


Oh, I know, hence why I replied so shortly to his ranting walls of texts. Good times...
 
2012-04-10 12:13:53 PM  
This entire thread has made me smile... especially Balchinian and headstone ... I love you guys ^.^
 
2012-04-10 12:14:03 PM  

headstone: dj_spanmaster: Crackers Are a Family Food: dj_spanmaster: As it happens, I love making people smile, especially at work. I say humorous, witty things. I bring jelly-filled donuts. I tickle them on the love handles.

I am a Farker.

*nods* Feels weird because, well, I'm a Farker, but I love making people happy. This world is so hurried, stressed, and depressed - one nice gesture can make someone's day. I love doing that.

Yes, but doing all of those nice gestures that I do at once makes everyone laugh coffee out their nose, which in turn makes me laugh too. See, it's a selfish thing, in a roundabout way.

[farm4.staticflickr.com image 360x496]


Okay, I don't know what that is, but it's hideous.
 
2012-04-10 12:23:20 PM  

dj_spanmaster: headstone: dj_spanmaster: Crackers Are a Family Food: dj_spanmaster: As it happens, I love making people smile, especially at work. I say humorous, witty things. I bring jelly-filled donuts. I tickle them on the love handles.

I am a Farker.

*nods* Feels weird because, well, I'm a Farker, but I love making people happy. This world is so hurried, stressed, and depressed - one nice gesture can make someone's day. I love doing that.

Yes, but doing all of those nice gestures that I do at once makes everyone laugh coffee out their nose, which in turn makes me laugh too. See, it's a selfish thing, in a roundabout way.

[farm4.staticflickr.com image 360x496]

Okay, I don't know what that is, but it's hideous.


it's Mr. Bean, shopped onto a baby, of course.
 
2012-04-10 12:27:52 PM  

BurnShrike:
Oh, good thing you told us you did tech support at the end. For a minute I thought you worked in phone sex.

/Or is that just a hobby?


No. I get that all the time, though.
Oohhh you got a sexay voice vudu
you married?

*barf*
 
2012-04-10 12:30:50 PM  
Really? Fark you!!!!!
 
2012-04-10 12:37:13 PM  

vudukungfu: BurnShrike:
Oh, good thing you told us you did tech support at the end. For a minute I thought you worked in phone sex.

/Or is that just a hobby?

No. I get that all the time, though.
Oohhh you got a sexay voice vudu
you married?

*barf*


Hey, it never hurts to earn a few bucks on the side, or to keep your options open.
 
2012-04-10 12:54:05 PM  
I haven't made anyone smile yet today. I crack more snarky jokes after lunch when my brain is sleepy from post-nomming coma.
 
2012-04-10 12:57:37 PM  
I probably contributed to ComicBookGuy and MontyBurns smiling. If so, I'm counting that.
 
2012-04-10 01:02:27 PM  
Yes.
 
2012-04-10 01:17:47 PM  

kiwimoogle84: I haven't made anyone smile yet today. I crack more snarky jokes after lunch when my brain is sleepy from post-nomming coma.


Kiwi, you always make me smile. ;)
 
2012-04-10 01:19:01 PM  
i1214.photobucket.com
 
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