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(Toronto Star)   Schizophrenic dancer brutally beaten to death in jail cell after eating 1 1/2 bags of another inmate's chips. Good thing he didn't finish the 2nd bag   (thestar.com) divider line 119
    More: Scary, Don Jail, schizophrenics, Unspoken rule, agreed statement, mental disorders, prisons  
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11149 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2012 at 2:12 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-04-05 10:59:44 AM  
In other news you can get Ruffles chips and chocolate bars in jail. For free even? You wacky Canadians with your socialized snack care.
 
2012-04-05 11:26:00 AM  
I'm your schizo dancer
Dancin' for Ruffles
Curb stomp me if you want to...
Schizo dancer
Dissin' the inmates
Kill me and get murder 2...
 
2012-04-05 11:33:07 AM  
The real joke's on the guy who gave the killer those chips. He's not getting any special consideration at meals now. Investment lost.
 
2012-04-05 11:37:23 AM  
Hold me schizophrenic dancer
Count the chips out on the bed...
 
2012-04-05 11:39:04 AM  
Thats a bit overreactive. I would understand it if it was over sunflower seeds, but potato chips? Dude, thats farked up
 
2012-04-05 11:45:48 AM  

cman: but potato chips? Dude, thats farked up


Dude - they were Ruffles!!!
2.bp.blogspot.com

Wash those down with a delicious Dr. Pepper!!

80s-music.net
 
2012-04-05 11:48:26 AM  

Bradog: Hold me schizophrenic dancer


I was going to go with crazy dancer, but I see my work is done.
 
2012-04-05 11:50:04 AM  
Nobody can eat just one.
 
2012-04-05 11:50:31 AM  
The shame of it all is that Mr. Munro did not eat the chips and would have returned them. Being a dancer, he had a flare for fashion and was simply taking the 'all dressed' theme up a notch and was adding some panache to the chips. He was merely feathering the Ruffles.
 
2012-04-05 11:54:15 AM  
"Careful, they're ruffled!"

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-04-05 11:56:19 AM  
His name was Munro, he was a schizo
he ate the ruffles from the dude over there
don't know if they we BBQ or cheddar
but he ate them behind iron bars
ate a whole bag and then half more
Troy was angry, he beat up Munro
until Munro could take no more

In TO-ronto, TO-ronto Can-ada, TO-ronto Can-ada
the hottest jail, North of Detroit
TO-ronto Can-ada
beatings and bashin, never go out of fashion
In TO-ronto, don't touch Troy's stuff!
 
2012-04-05 12:04:39 PM  
Hold me closer schizophrenic dancer

Count the headlights on the highway
 
2012-04-05 12:46:39 PM  
Dear God, what have I started!??!?
 
2012-04-05 01:42:39 PM  
The Donder Dancer Dashed
no longer the Vixen
his Prancer? No Comet
his Cupid got Blitzen.
 
2012-04-05 02:15:15 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org
what a schitzophrenic dancer might look like.
 
2012-04-05 02:15:47 PM  
Sadly, this whole tragedy came about due to a misunderstanding. He simply thought the chips belonged to one of his other personalities.
 
2012-04-05 02:16:32 PM  
What, would they have been sodomized and raped first?
 
2012-04-05 02:18:50 PM  
If you read the story, the victim only ate half a bag of chips...not that it matters, but subby: get your irrational, non-sensical murder rationales correct.
 
2012-04-05 02:19:31 PM  
All that for a bag of chips?!


Requisite pic of vic:
i.thestar.com


/you can't beat just one...
 
2012-04-05 02:19:51 PM  
Sometimes, I am willing to depart from my usual "the death penalty is a bad idea" stance.

This is one of those times.
 
2012-04-05 02:20:59 PM  

Bradog: Hold me schizophrenic dancer


That would have made a better lyric then 'hold me closer Tony Danza'.
 
2012-04-05 02:21:13 PM  
weird, putting crazy people in jail with regular inmates usually never causes problems.
 
2012-04-05 02:21:49 PM  
They were in jail and therefore deserved whatever they got, right? Or does that only work with prison sex.
 
2012-04-05 02:22:11 PM  
I blame America.
 
2012-04-05 02:23:00 PM  
Death of a schizo dancer? Well, it happens a lot around here...
 
2012-04-05 02:23:17 PM  

Headso: weird, putting crazy people in jail with regular inmates usually never causes problems.


Nope, Nuh-huh, no sirrie bob. Never.
 
2012-04-05 02:23:42 PM  
Well he's got his jail respect, which will come in handy over then next 4 or 5 decades. Hope it was worth it.
 
2012-04-05 02:24:11 PM  
When keeping real goes wrong.
 
2012-04-05 02:25:04 PM  
Killed over potato chips? I'd hate to see what he would have done about drinking his milkshake.
 
2012-04-05 02:26:13 PM  
The victim got beat because he thought he was all that and a bag of chips.
 
2012-04-05 02:27:07 PM  
As opposed to being gently beaten to death, I suppose?
 
2012-04-05 02:29:04 PM  
I was killed because I ate a bag of chips and am schizophrenic. So was I.
 
2012-04-05 02:29:09 PM  

Hypothetical Imperative: As opposed to being gently beaten to death, I suppose?


He had his face stomped into his head. Repeatedly.

I'd call that a bit more brutal than most normal beatings, even those ending in death.
 
2012-04-05 02:32:08 PM  
RRRUFFLES have RRRIDGES

...now, so does his head
 
2012-04-05 02:33:10 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Bradog: Hold me schizophrenic dancer


That would have made a better lyric then 'hold me closer Tony Danza'.


Schizophrenic? Too many blows to the head?
assets.nydailynews.com
 
2012-04-05 02:33:51 PM  
www.meredy.com

RIP Monroe
 
2012-04-05 02:34:38 PM  
Good thing he didnt smoke his cigarettes.
 
2012-04-05 02:35:00 PM  

That coward David Lopan: I was killed because I ate a bag of chips and am schizophrenic. So was I.


Cute joke, but you're thinking Multiple Personality Disorder. In this case, it would be the that the purple-viking-dragonosaur in the corner of his cell told him that the chips were rightfully his and if he ate them he could take a trip to Farfignugenland.
 
2012-04-05 02:40:51 PM  

Hyppy: Hypothetical Imperative: As opposed to being gently beaten to death, I suppose?

He had his face stomped into his head. Repeatedly.

I'd call that a bit more brutal than most normal beatings, even those ending in death.


I'd wager that a significant portion of people who die from "beatings" were stomped or kicked in the head. I just think it's reasonably safe to assume that if you died from a beating, it was pretty brutal.

For the record I've never personally witnessed a stomping that I did not intervene in, and yeah I've gotten my own ass kicked pretty good for it on more than one occasion. Even almost got myself stabbed once and then was arrested for my trouble. No ITG here, just an odd bit of morality that I can't force myself to ignore. For some reason I have this notion that a "fair fight" ends when someone starts kicking at someone else's head and feel compelled to do something about it. It's going to get me royally f*cked up one day, I'm sure.
 
2012-04-05 02:43:10 PM  
Schizo? Maybe he was 'Dancing with Myself'?
Yeah yeah CapeFearCadaver- I know you took a psychology class. Are my fries done?
 
2012-04-05 02:45:27 PM  
Did this particular jail not have a mentally ill seclusion section?

Especially if he was acting disorganized and psychotic prior to his death, you would think jail SOP would have called for him to be placed into isolation pending med review.
 
2012-04-05 02:46:17 PM  

redsquid: Schizo? Maybe he was 'Dancing with Myself'?
Yeah yeah CapeFearCadaver- I know you took a psychology class. Are my fries done?


My sister is schizophrenic.
 
2012-04-05 02:47:11 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: The schizo didn't eat a bag and a half, he ate what remained of the second bag after the psycho ate the first.


Yes, Subby here.

Mea Culpa:

I realized this right after I submitted the story, and so I hoped they would post my other submission which had a more sensibe title. The title of that one was:


(Toronto Sun) A mentally ill person eats 1/2 of your bag of potato chips. Do you: A) Ask them politely why they did that. B) Berate them over their atrocious manners. C) Kill them by beating them beyond recognition


farm6.static.flickr.com
 
2012-04-05 02:49:24 PM  

mavrickatubc: If you read the story, the victim only ate half a bag of chips...not that it matters, but subby: get your irrational, non-sensical murder rationales correct.


Yes, yes. Read what I just wrote to other person who noticed this (previous post).

I know. :-P
 
2012-04-05 02:50:44 PM  

The 4chan Psychiatrist: Did this particular jail not have a mentally ill seclusion section?

Especially if he was acting disorganized and psychotic prior to his death, you would think jail SOP would have called for him to be placed into isolation pending med review.


Jails are not known for their empathy.
 
2012-04-05 02:51:41 PM  
To the headline, is there any way to be beaten to death that isn't brutal?
 
2012-04-05 02:54:58 PM  
oops.. will try that again...
 
2012-04-05 02:59:59 PM  
That guy was a chip Nazi!

...with a CHIP on his shoulder!

ps: this gif is supposed to be animated...dunno what happened.

farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2012-04-05 03:00:49 PM  
Lucky he didn't say anything about the dirty knife.

www.humorlinks.com
 
2012-04-05 03:06:09 PM  

LoneDoggie: To the headline, is there any way to be beaten to death that isn't brutal?


Well, this was especially brutal!

According to a report on CBC radio, his face was beaten beyond recogniton.
 
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