If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Bleacher Report)   Will Big Bossman's ghost help Jericho drag CM Punk's daddy's coffin away? How many hours will Undertaker's intro take? Can Sheamus become World Heavyweight Fella? Will Brock Lesnar appear? It's Wrestlemania 28, 7 PM on PPV   (bleacherreport.com) divider line 5851
    More: Interesting, Big Boss Man, Brock Lesnar, Randy Orton, WWE, PPV, funeral directors, WrestleMania XXVIII  
•       •       •

3689 clicks; posted to Sports » on 01 Apr 2012 at 6:00 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



5851 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Last
 
2012-04-01 06:47:03 PM  
armbar
 
2012-04-01 06:47:16 PM  
Getting it in early:

media.tumblr.com

BNT, CeN

Biggest. Night. Tonight, CeNation.

A clash of champions, an epic battle spanning 2 era's of athletes. We will all bear witness to greatness as the great one, the people's champ, the most electrifying man in the ring and on the silver screen, faces off against The Rock. Cena's dug deep for this match, going back to his hip hop roots and shaming the People's Twitter Account for weeks now. Cena's had enough of whooping everyone in the locker room, and so to keep is insatiable appetite for carnage under control, Vince . . I mean, Triple Oak, had to call the best 'B' movie agent there is and ask if the Rock is available. The actor was free this weekend, to the surprise of absolutely no one.

After the recent tragedies involving the soldier who killed 17 people, and the shooting involving teenager Treyvon Martin, the troops and the children need John Cena more than ever. And he has answered their call. Training nonstop to defend against The Rocks arsenal of devastating moves like "raising his eyebrow" and kip-ups and the People's Elbow, or as the great Mick Foley called it, "that abortion of a move". While there is no doubt that this will be a battle, as Sun Tzu said, every battle is won before it is ever fought. And Cena has the hops and dreams of a grateful nation ready to carry him to victory.

If he can keep his guard up and control the pace of the fight, he should win, but just in case it gets tricky in there, he needs to remember his:

Keys to Victory
Armbar: Not a move he commonly uses, which makes it great for catching the People's Chump off guard. He won't be so quick to drop a People's Elbow if you rip that sucker out of its socket.
Attitude Adjustment: Literally and figuratively no one is more in need of an attitude adjustment than Dwayne Johnson. The man runs from professional wrestling, then comes back to promote twitter, and has the nerve to call out a man who has carried the WWE on his broad shoulders for years. It's pathetic, and the drop off those shoulders will remind him of whose house he's in.
Five Knuckle Shuffle: An extremely effective variation on the People's Elbow, there is now better statement of "old and tired" vs "new and exciting" than this. Knock him to the ground, intimidate him with your war dance, then drop 5 knuckles of pain onto his stupid eyebrow. However, if after that he's still conscious, you can always unleash the
Flying Shoulder Blocks: "What's that in the sky? A bird? A plane?" No, Rock, you insufferable douche, it's John F*cking Cena hurtling at you like the meteor on Armageddon. And there he is doing it again. And again. And maybe again. No more after that though. What? You think you can counter this with a punch? Cena's cat like quickness will dodge, and you will end up on your back. I'm calling it.

So there you have it, folks, the "how's" and "why's" as to John Cena's inevitable victory. Just like Mitt Romney, you may want the other guy to win, you may concoct elaborate and fantastical reasons why the other guy will win, but you know deep down that Mitt Cena is going to raise his hands in victory. It should be a great match, I'm really looking forward to it.

BBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRABDABDADBADADBADBADBADBABDABDBADBADBABDABDABDBABDABD AD O!
 
2012-04-01 06:47:35 PM  

Dougie AXP: Wettner: I always enjoy Wresltlemania while walking along brooks, rivers or streams. Does anyone know any good water ways in which I could stroll along?

I've heard in Europe, you can stroll along FRONT and center...just make sure you keep things organized and in a ROW in order to keep the bodies of water moving.


That is a lovely idea. Thank you.
 
2012-04-01 06:47:35 PM  

LegacyDL: I swear is AJ even legal?

Her mannerisms are on par with Child labor.


I'd be happy to have a seat over there where she's concerned, if you catch my drift.
 
2012-04-01 06:48:01 PM  
FARK YOU COMCAST!!!!!!
 
2012-04-01 06:48:18 PM  
'Taker needs to learn that a win is a win is a win, man.
 
2012-04-01 06:48:32 PM  

FinFangFark: tbaughm: Dark match to opening match of WM in one year for both of these two is pretty impressive

Eventually they will main event...I mean Triple H and Undertaker will eventually stop facing each other...right?


Undertaker will have two fake hips and HHH will have a torn quad, but Wrestlemania 35 will have a wheelchair match as the main event.
 
2012-04-01 06:48:42 PM  

Dougie AXP: Anyone else having Comcast Wrestlemania PPV Problems? apparently they are swamped with phone calls. My current wait time is 11 minutes and i still need a Pizza...faaaark


Nope, no problem here....
 
2012-04-01 06:49:14 PM  

zomega: Dougie AXP: Anyone else having Comcast Wrestlemania PPV Problems? apparently they are swamped with phone calls. My current wait time is 11 minutes and i still need a Pizza...faaaark

Nope, no problem here....


FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
 
2012-04-01 06:49:16 PM  

I Said: Getting it in early:

[media.tumblr.com image 450x644]

BNT, CeN

Biggest. Night. Tonight, CeNation.

A clash of champions, an epic battle spanning 2 era's of athletes. We will all bear witness to greatness as the great one, the people's champ, the most electrifying man in the ring and on the silver screen, faces off against The Rock. Cena's dug deep for this match, going back to his hip hop roots and shaming the People's Twitter Account for weeks now. Cena's had enough of whooping everyone in the locker room, and so to keep is insatiable appetite for carnage under control, Vince . . I mean, Triple Oak, had to call the best 'B' movie agent there is and ask if the Rock is available. The actor was free this weekend, to the surprise of absolutely no one.

After the recent tragedies involving the soldier who killed 17 people, and the shooting involving teenager Treyvon Martin, the troops and the children need John Cena more than ever. And he has answered their call. Training nonstop to defend against The Rocks arsenal of devastating moves like "raising his eyebrow" and kip-ups and the People's Elbow, or as the great Mick Foley called it, "that abortion of a move". While there is no doubt that this will be a battle, as Sun Tzu said, every battle is won before it is ever fought. And Cena has the hops and dreams of a grateful nation ready to carry him to victory.

If he can keep his guard up and control the pace of the fight, he should win, but just in case it gets tricky in there, he needs to remember his:

Keys to Victory
Armbar: Not a move he commonly uses, which makes it great for catching the People's Chump off guard. He won't be so quick to drop a People's Elbow if you rip that sucker out of its socket.
Attitude Adjustment: Literally and figuratively no one is more in need of an attitude adjustment than Dwayne Johnson. The man runs from professional wrestling, then comes back to promote twitter, and has the nerve to call out a man who has carried the WWE on his broad ...


I love that pic so much.
 
2012-04-01 06:49:22 PM  
Been lurking most of the last year (i work on mondays and live on the left coast) but its WRESTLEMANIA, so lets do the predictions

1.Tripping balls
2.bag shiatter
3.cody rhodes
4.under
5.dbd
6.ace team
7.miz
8.brock interferes in ut/Hx3
9.jericho
10.cena
100.UT


shiat UP DOUGIE!!!

I always wanted to do that
 
2012-04-01 06:49:26 PM  

slamjack: FinFangFark: tbaughm: Dark match to opening match of WM in one year for both of these two is pretty impressive

Eventually they will main event...I mean Triple H and Undertaker will eventually stop facing each other...right?

Undertaker will have two fake hips and HHH will have a torn quad, but Wrestlemania 35 will have a wheelchair match as the main event.


Don't give Vince ideas. Actually...a wheelchair match has an interesting premise...
 
2012-04-01 06:49:27 PM  
Haven't paid cash money for a Mania since 2004. No plans to change that tonight.
 
2012-04-01 06:49:27 PM  

Backstreets: LegacyDL: I swear is AJ even legal?

Her mannerisms are on par with Child labor.

I'd be happy to have a seat over there where she's concerned, if you catch my drift.


I know where she can have a seat...if you catch my drift. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

I'm talking about my penis.
 
2012-04-01 06:49:29 PM  
"Shawn is better than you and everybody knows it."

=

GAGNE RAAAAAAAAAAAAGE
 
2012-04-01 06:49:39 PM  

robsul82: Danielson vs. Sheamus is curtainjerking.


Isn't this the second or third year in a row now that the Rumble winner was the curtain jerker?
 
2012-04-01 06:50:08 PM  
Shawn's smirk at "he is" is so classic, lol.
 
2012-04-01 06:50:28 PM  

tbaughm: slamjack: FinFangFark: tbaughm: Dark match to opening match of WM in one year for both of these two is pretty impressive

Eventually they will main event...I mean Triple H and Undertaker will eventually stop facing each other...right?

Undertaker will have two fake hips and HHH will have a torn quad, but Wrestlemania 35 will have a wheelchair match as the main event.

Don't give Vince ideas. Actually...a wheelchair match has an interesting premise...


We can only hope Vince is dead at that point.
 
2012-04-01 06:50:34 PM  

krej55: Been lurking most of the last year (i work on mondays and live on the left coast) but its WRESTLEMANIA, so lets do the predictions

1.Tripping balls
2.bag shiatter
3.cody rhodes
4.under
5.dbd
6.ace team
7.miz
8.brock interferes in ut/Hx3
9.jericho
10.cena
100.UT


shiat UP DOUGIE!!!

I always wanted to do that


Welcome!

:CHAIRSHOT!:
 
2012-04-01 06:50:41 PM  
I honestly hope the World Title hasn't reached "ECW Championship" status.
 
2012-04-01 06:50:47 PM  

KellyKellyKelly: I love that pic


"And with arms that could crush a small car, the wild Cena is seen here lovingly carrying his baby goat to safety . . ."
 
2012-04-01 06:51:06 PM  

hundreddollarman: robsul82: Danielson vs. Sheamus is curtainjerking.

Isn't this the second or third year in a row now that the Rumble winner was the curtain jerker?


Second year. 26 had a tag title match on first.
 
2012-04-01 06:51:27 PM  
I actually ordered this PPV HD Stream on WWE.com.. I refuse to play chase the stream tonight..
 
2012-04-01 06:51:37 PM  

robsul82: Shawn's smirk at "he is" is so classic, lol.


I would actually find a Shawn/HHH match more interesting than HHH/Taker
 
2012-04-01 06:51:46 PM  
It better Goddamn be once in a lifetime, lol.
 
2012-04-01 06:51:49 PM  
fwiw if you have netflix and like wrasslin there is some good stuff on there.
 
2012-04-01 06:51:58 PM  
At least we won't have to hear these songs anymore after Wrestlemania
 
2012-04-01 06:52:02 PM  
I can't wait for Wrestlemania to be over so that the Rock/Cena promos will stop
 
2012-04-01 06:52:06 PM  
I've noticed a few names I have never seen before. WELCOME LURKERS! SHOW US YOUR CYBER FACE! :-D
 
2012-04-01 06:52:08 PM  
WWE Creative @WWE_Creative
The show is locked, timing is finalized and we're set to...here comes Vince. Time to shred this draft and start over #Wrestlemania
 
2012-04-01 06:52:20 PM  
Challenge: finding a stream that works on the PS3 browser.
 
2012-04-01 06:52:25 PM  

silgryphon: At least we won't have to hear these songs anymore after Wrestlemania


BUT THE MEMORY REMAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS
 
2012-04-01 06:52:32 PM  

styckx: I actually ordered this PPV HD Stream on WWE.com.. I refuse to play chase the stream tonight..


hmmmm . . . might do this too
 
2012-04-01 06:52:52 PM  

FinFangFark: silgryphon: At least we won't have to hear these songs anymore after Wrestlemania

BUT THE MEMORY REMAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS


BUT TONIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT WE ARE YOUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG
 
2012-04-01 06:53:22 PM  
WWE Creative @WWE_Creative
Big pop for the Spanish Announce Team, or as they're known in Miami, the Announce Team #WrestleMania
 
2012-04-01 06:53:24 PM  

I Said: styckx: I actually ordered this PPV HD Stream on WWE.com.. I refuse to play chase the stream tonight..

hmmmm . . . might do this too


I have Comcast, and I'm hearing from numerous people that there is both a cable issue, and an ordering online...not good.
 
2012-04-01 06:53:44 PM  
Is anything goin on right now besides this HHH/Taker video package?
 
2012-04-01 06:54:00 PM  
WRESTLEMANIA POINTS COMPETITION (stolen from the brilliant bastard who did the RR) (Jim from Saint Paul edit: That's right people. I'm a brilliant bastard. HA!)

1 point Piss break match: Team Tripping Balls if they don't gut this match for time
2 point Poop break match: Randy Orton
3 point Embarrassment match: Cody Rhodes
4 point TWITTER RELATED question: Over or Under 10.5 video promos/backstage moments: OVER
5 point YES YES YES match: Great White; There has to be one title change fella. I'm okay with this because DB had a great run and we can see how he does as a heel chasing the title
6 point Hold on a Minute player match: The Ace Team better win as they have all the better stars
7 point I'm going to text you the answer question: Name 1 survivor if they make it elimination, or name the person who gets the win (i.e. pinfall/submission): AWESOME!
8 point WRESTLEMANIA MOMENT question: What will be the highlight/big shock of the night?: Even though I'm taking one for the reverse jinx in the 100 point question, my honest answer is that Vince will pull an April Fool's Joke by swerving either a big Batista or Lesner return tonight and not having them come out or having it as a joke
9 point Tro-lo-lo match: CM Punk
10 point Booked a Year Out Match: Cena will win and get booed out of the building to end the show. Great storytelling would be that he would cheat ever so slightly to win, but I don't think we are going to see that.
100 point END OF OUR FUN ERA Match: HHH. Yes, I know Taker will win, but I would never forgive myself if I don't jinx this now. Deep down in rewrite 6 or 7 today, HHH had the idea that ending the streak could make him a Vince level heel but then he could turn himself face to battle Lesner and beat him too. Just in case, it's all about the GAME in my pick (because if you get this wrong, you don't deserve to win)


Jim from Saint Paul: HHH "Supplemental" questions. All worth zero points:

Will Rock miss his kip-up? NO
Who has the most noticeable botch: Rock or Cena? There will only be a slightly one, with both to blame
Will it take more then 10 minutes from the start of HBK's music to get to the starting bell? Oh yeah
Will you wonder why you're not watching Game of Thrones halfway through this card? No, I still need to watch season 1
Will we be pleasantly surprised by how awesome this PPV ends up being? No, we'll mock it a lot
 
2012-04-01 06:54:11 PM  
The Sky preshow banner music is very relaxing. I'm gonna go take a nap before the lime juice kicks in.
 
2012-04-01 06:54:19 PM  
So where's Bobby and the Gorilla
 
2012-04-01 06:54:45 PM  

FinFangFark: Backstreets: LegacyDL: I swear is AJ even legal?

Her mannerisms are on par with Child labor.

I'd be happy to have a seat over there where she's concerned, if you catch my drift.

I know where she can have a seat...if you catch my drift. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

I'm talking about my penis.


images5.fanpop.com

i.dailymail.co.uk

Say No More.....
 
2012-04-01 06:54:45 PM  
I'm not sure if I'll be in the thread too much tonight (Not that I add anything) but I do think it will be sad to watch both Taker and Rock job tonight.

I just hope they don't go out to a Sweet Chin Music and F5.
 
2012-04-01 06:54:54 PM  

robsul82: FinFangFark: silgryphon: At least we won't have to hear these songs anymore after Wrestlemania

BUT THE MEMORY REMAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS

BUT TONIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT WE ARE YOUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG


I GOT A FEEEEELING THAT I NEVER NEVER HAD BEFORE UH OH.
 
2012-04-01 06:55:00 PM  
I just wanna see taker with a bald head
 
2012-04-01 06:55:07 PM  
Pizza Rolls are cooking, DR Pepper is chilling, and WM is mere moments away!
 
2012-04-01 06:55:19 PM  

silgryphon: So where's Bobby and the Gorilla


Sheamus and DBD curtain-jerking has left them inconsolable.
 
2012-04-01 06:55:29 PM  
My method of watching is still preshow. Undertaker VoiceOver. Am I doing something wrong (other than stealing)?
 
2012-04-01 06:55:35 PM  
FINALLY...

I have a legitimate reason to biatch if this PPV sucks. On a side note, there is almost no way Brock singing just yesterday hasn't been planned since he announced his retirement (probably beforehand).
 
2012-04-01 06:55:55 PM  
GAGNE IS SO HAUNTED BY SHAWN'S ENTRANCES
 
2012-04-01 06:56:20 PM  
Here is my guess for tonight:

Link (new window)

If a TFer feels that can be posted in thread, feel free to put it in.
 
Displayed 50 of 5851 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Last

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report