I used to follow social norms back before you'd heard of them. Now I've moved on. I'm above that kind of thing.

/hipster
/no longer invited to weddings
/or parties
/or lunch
/or anywhere

Panicman
"Trampolines aren't as great as people think they are."


please turn in your man card sir , it has been revoked

cettin: What the fark? When did Fark become Ann Landers?

Fark is more like Dear Prudie watching Dan Savage rub one out on the way to work.

How is she going to use that trampoline? Does it fit in the kitchen?

/try the veal..da da

The wife and I registered at Target, Walmart, and BBBeyond. I held the scanner, so every time she turned her back, another case of beer was added to the registry. I also added an XBox, toilet paper, and other ridiculous goods to the list. She was not amused in the slightest when we printed the registry for a final review. All of that stuff got instantly removed. Something about how it would be embarrassing for her family members to see that stuff. I thought (and my father-in-law) thought it was hilarious.
Now that baby #1 is on the way, we get to go through the joyous task of registering for baby gear. Guess who is not allowed to hold the scanner, but instead just nod his head in agreement. It's like I was subconsciously planning years in advance! (Beer did mysteriously make it onto this registry, however. Baby is due in June, and we might need a frosty refreshment post birth.)

The gifts are to make up for the sex you won't be having.

Are you supposed to take the rice out of the bag or just heave the 5 pound sack at the newlyweds?

Firstly - I never got my towel, I'm looking at you Guinness.
Secondly - I'm getting married in June. My fiancee and I have quite a long registry and if people give us stuff, that's awesome. We both have our own places and we tried very hard to register for only practical things, like a vacuum cleaner.
Thirdly - I want my towel!

FTFA:

"Susan, my person of honor at our wedding..."

And I stopped reading.