Link

That sums it up rather nicely.

chairborne: untaken_name:
Have you ever considered the possibility that your boobs are nicer to look at than your face?

I laughed so hard my back cracked.Nice.

Always happy to help. Now if I can just get MY back to crack....

chairborne: I've never had problems with women thinking I'm creepy when I display admiration for their appearance, but then I'm polite but more important, I'm attractive too.

The First Rule of Not Being Described as Creepy and Getting Away with Mild Sexual Harrassment:

Don't be Ugly.

Sucks but it's true, and it shows that most women are just as shallow as most men.

I saw where you said you're attractive. I dunno, dude. You've...I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you've got a pretty bad pixelation problem with your face. Sorry.

I think it's not just "don't be ugly." I think it's "have some social clue." And social clue isn't what people think it is. As far as cluefulness for men on interacting with women socially in a "spark" sense, I recommend David DeAngelo.

It's actually pretty hilarious that the guy fell head over heels in love with a relationship counselor and he and his new wife are now doing a live seminar in Vegas for couples. But I digress. (No, he pays me no money, I'm just still laughing at how the mighty fell.)

Seriously, the guy has a good basic understanding of women and how not to annoy us and how not to creep us out while still hanging onto your balls and your self-respect and pursuing what you want.

I started out getting his newsletter because I wanted to be able to recognize and avoid players, wound up respecting the guy.

I subscribed to his double your dates newsletter from his site without buying his book or paying him a dime. YMMV if you buy his stuff, but his free newsletter is pretty solid advice about what gets under our skin and turns us on---not what we say we want. I'll give him credit for that, even though it's frequently aggravating to realize he's right---the guys I've wanted to bang and have gone back out with and obsessed over and gone to bed with have been the guys who played the game his way.

And I feel better about recommending him now that I know he actually went and got himself caught. [grin]

I like to be looked at. I even like to be whistled and commented on, presuming they're kind comments. On the internet, however, I prefer to go unnoticed. People here are waaay nastier than the real life comments.

I've never understood the internet attention whore though. They can't see you. They don't know what you really look like. Myspace angles and good photoshop work can make anyone look good, and then it's just a lie. I'd rather a construction worker whistled at me after a visual inspection (much rarer these days, sigh) than a fellow internet nerd drooled over the only information he has: default female.

mudesi: vrax: The simple fact is that we live in a prudish society. Violence is great and sexuality is repressed here in the US. We're somewhat of a mess.

[www.jamesjoyce.co.uk image 340x480]

When I went to Jamaica, I couldn't believe what a breath of fresh air it was. Men openly and VOCALLY admiring, joking, flirting with women to their faces (and asses), and women flirting and laughing right the fark back. No big deal. Part of being a normal human being.

No offense. No awkwardness. Just "Hey sweetie pie, shake that thang" replied with "**smile** Ha ha ha why don't you shake it first stud muffin".

I hate this culture I'm forced to live in, I really do.

Vrax Mudesi: Relax you two. I don't know you personally, but I get the feeling that you wouldn't get laid any more often even if you didn't live in such a "prudish" society like North America's. Don't hate...

The puritains might be gone, but damned if they still aren't poisoning us today.

Kome: Seinfeld did it best.

At what?

/Seinfeld sucks.

Peekoo: I like to be looked at. I even like to be whistled and commented on, presuming they're kind comments. On the internet, however, I prefer to go unnoticed. People here are waaay nastier than the real life comments.

I've never understood the internet attention whore though. They can't see you. They don't know what you really look like. Myspace angles and good photoshop work can make anyone look good, and then it's just a lie. I'd rather a construction worker whistled at me after a visual inspection (much rarer these days, sigh) than a fellow internet nerd drooled over the only information he has: default female.

hey baby you want some. fries to go with that shake?

LindyJohn: mudesi: vrax: The simple fact is that we live in a prudish society. Violence is great and sexuality is repressed here in the US. We're somewhat of a mess.

[www.jamesjoyce.co.uk image 340x480]

When I went to Jamaica, I couldn't believe what a breath of fresh air it was. Men openly and VOCALLY admiring, joking, flirting with women to their faces (and asses), and women flirting and laughing right the fark back. No big deal. Part of being a normal human being.

No offense. No awkwardness. Just "Hey sweetie pie, shake that thang" replied with "**smile** Ha ha ha why don't you shake it first stud muffin".

I hate this culture I'm forced to live in, I really do.

Vrax Mudesi: Relax you two. I don't know you personally, but I get the feeling that you wouldn't get laid any more often even if you didn't live in such a "prudish" society like North America's. Don't hate...

Huh? Who was talking about "getting laid" or hate, for that matter? That the US is a sexually repressed country is a fact.

Julie Cochrane:
I saw where you said you're attractive. I dunno, dude. You've...I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you've got a pretty bad pixelation problem with your face. Sorry.


aww baby, the doctor says those pixels will go away once this topical wide spectrum antiviral cream kicks in... I swear it's not contagious!

That reminds me actually, that profile pic is nearly a decade old and I had kind of forgotten about it, probably should update it as I've upgraded to a reload-spider monkey, the squirrel left me for a space shuttle door gunner and I've yet to get over the pain of the loss.

Peekoo: I like to be looked at. I even like to be whistled and commented on, presuming they're kind comments. On the internet, however, I prefer to go unnoticed. People here are waaay nastier than the real life comments.

I've never understood the internet attention whore though. They can't see you. They don't know what you really look like. Myspace angles and good photoshop work can make anyone look good, and then it's just a lie. I'd rather a construction worker whistled at me after a visual inspection (much rarer these days, sigh) than a fellow internet nerd drooled over the only information he has: default female.

It sounds like your ego is based on your looks rather than your personality. Or maybe you are living in the real world rather than on the internet. Me, my ability to reproduce is directly tied to the invention of a wireless sperm router and personality.

Mentat: kvinesknows: Peekoo: I like to be looked at. I even like to be whistled and commented on, presuming they're kind comments. On the internet, however, I prefer to go unnoticed. People here are waaay nastier than the real life comments.

I've never understood the internet attention whore though. They can't see you. They don't know what you really look like. Myspace angles and good photoshop work can make anyone look good, and then it's just a lie. I'd rather a construction worker whistled at me after a visual inspection (much rarer these days, sigh) than a fellow internet nerd drooled over the only information he has: default female.

hey baby you want some. fries to go with that shake?

Nice train baby! Where's the caboose?

If I had a swing like that I'd put it in my backyard!

as a female construction worker living in camp I'm getting a kick...

hasty ambush: Why Men Stare NSFW (new window)

See, that's the thing. If a woman wants to dress like that, then hey, awesome, more power to 'em. But you can't dress like that ("look at meeeeeeee") and then complain that we're looking at you!

/complaining about the drooling is okay tho
//and the compulsive public wanking

Psh. When I was young and attractive, I let a large amount of cleavage hang out and I enjoyed the gazes. Anybody complaining needs to not put the merchandise on display if they don't like window shoppers. People can't help looking at pretty things if you dangle them in front of their faces.

Matter of fact, I suspect most of the women who expose themselves and then complain about gazes are full of shiat. They WANT the attention, then complain about it to either appear less slutty or convince others that they are desirable.

stainedglassdoll: umad: stainedglassdoll: I know men look. But for heaven's sake, do it discretely. Don't make unsolicited interest obvious, THAT is what creeps me out the most. You can look at me but I don't want to know what you think of what you see.

Sunglasses are a man's second best friend.

Sure. But the whole article just feels like some pathetic justification of why men should get to continue doing something that clearly makes some women uncomfortable, just because they wanna.

Given that you just said the exact same thing as the article - look, don't leer, for at most one second (from a man) or 2-3 seconds (from a woman), smile and move on - I doubt that you even read beyond the first few paragraphs of the article.

sn0wblind: misses the obvious part. women stare at women almost as much as men do.

QFT. If her eyes were dicks, my sweetie would have violated thousands by now.

When we were neanderthals, and we had stopped posture, all we could really look at were butts and backsides since we could not make eye contact very well. Now we are upright and bipdeal and we can not only make eye contact, but look at the whole figure of a woman. So the next time some biatch gives you trouible for staring, just remember, it is a sign of your advanced evolution.

Sometimes they're being asked to be stared at... right, right?

stainedglassdoll: My whole point was that I don't want that attention.

Then, just curious, but why do you wear makeup?

It's like staring at the sun, you do it, but do it quick.

And then weasel your way out for a drive-by-leering.

Aloy: Uh, no, I wear yoga pants (or some other sort of pants like that) constantly, and why you ask? Because they're 500 times comfier than jeans and I can reliably stretch and do other fun things in them. If you act like a douche to me just because YOU think I'm wearing the "wrong thing", then prepared for me to temporarily suspend the code of honor that keeps me from punching you in the junk.

Sorry, yoga pants are both the jeans/sweatpants of the 00's, worn when you don't give a damn about yourself, but simultaneously show off your butt - and genitals now. If you're uncomfortable with your genitals being paraded in public, you wouldn't be wearing them, but you say that you're more comfortable in them than anything else, so you're either an exhibitionist in denial or utterly ignorant of what other see. No man here is saying you're wearing the wrong thing, just that they're going to admire what you're displaying. Women are more likely to call you a skank for flashing your labia in public, men will just admire.

stainedglassdoll: You mean to the end, near where it says "Beautiful women are like flowers," W interjects. "They turn to the sun. But if they don't receive a certain amount of attention, they wither"? Yea, I read it. My whole point was that I don't want that attention. Or what about the penultimate sentence: "Longing makes us sad, but at least it proves we're still alive." Maybe this guy in particular is discreet, but that's a poor and selfish justification for anything that potentially makes another person uncomfortable. A guy could easily cross the line using that reasoning.

Yet your advice was nearly identical to the article's, so I don't get it.

Also, you do not have a right to not be offended. You do have a right to offend back. You have a right to call someone out, to spread the word, to ruin a life with words and shame if it struck you, but you have never and will never have a right to not be offended. Society creates polite manners and continually updates them as social norms change, but those norms have to cover the outlandishly attention whoring to the meek and mousy. No man on the street will know if you're the woman who will be offended if he meekly smiles at you, or the woman offended if he doesn't grab his crotch and lick his lips, to use some extremes. It goes both ways.

stainedglassdoll: I know men look. But for heaven's sake, do it discretely. Don't make unsolicited interest obvious, THAT is what creeps me out the most. You can look at me but I don't want to know what you think of what you see.

You sound young.

Two weeks ago a guy following me up a flight of stairs caught up to me at the top and said, "How many brothers fall in love with you?" I cracked a huge smile and replied, "Dozens."

I love it every time a man I've never seen before tells me I'm beautiful. I hope they never stop.

hasty ambush: Why Men Stare NSFW (new window)

Wow, Grable's Daughter made the first page of that thread. Meta-attention whoring?

stainedglassdoll: umad: stainedglassdoll: I know men look. But for heaven's sake, do it discretely. Don't make unsolicited interest obvious, THAT is what creeps me out the most. You can look at me but I don't want to know what you think of what you see.

Sunglasses are a man's second best friend.

Sure. But the whole article just feels like some pathetic justification of why men should get to continue doing something that clearly makes some women uncomfortable, just because they wanna.

this, this right here
my exact thoughts.

duh

Aloy: Uh, no, I wear yoga pants (or some other sort of pants like that) constantly, and why you ask? Because they're 500 times comfier than jeans and I can reliably stretch and do other fun things in them. If you act like a douche to me just because YOU think I'm wearing the "wrong thing", then prepared for me to temporarily suspend the code of honor that keeps me from punching you in the junk.

If you are completely unaware of the fact that yoga pants leave almost nothing to the imagination and are guaranteed to attract attention, then you are dumber than dirt.

And if you think punching a man in his junk for checking you out when you are dressed that way is acceptable, you are a psycho-biatch.

/Hot like my gaze

Really? 177 posts and like 4 pics? I'm ashamed of you. Really,,, Not a book mark. You suck.

There's nothing wrong with looking at the menu as long as you don't order anything

The wife and I make an event of going out girl watching on the weekends. We go and find a public spot like a mall or something and find a bench and plant ourselves there for a while. As we find nice looking women walking by, if the other is not looking, we alert each other with a little, "Hmm!"

And this is the time of year when girl watching starts getting more fun. As the weather warms up, the clothes start to shrink.

Because she lets me
<img src="http://">

vrax: The simple fact is that we live in a prudish society. Violence is great and sexuality is repressed here in the US. We're somewhat of a mess.

I'll never understand this statement. If you go up to a random person and whack him on the back, it would be considered a great breach of our social norms - and you're likely to get arrested too. As to sexuality and flirting with random people, it depends on the context. In school or at work, nope. In a bar or a club or on the beach, sure.

Once combination
still impresses;
women, wind
and summer dresses

I'll just leave this here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cHaufA26B8

Its very simple guys. If they're dressed normally but just happen to have a very attractive body, don't get caught looking. If they're wearing something obviously sexy, then its perfectly fine to enjoy the view in an obvious fashion. Bottom line, they aren't wearing mini-skirts and bikini tops around town because they don't want people looking at them. They're asking for attention, it would be rude not to give it to them.

Of course, then you get the biatchy ones that dress like sluts and then feign offense when you look. They're still doing it for the attention, they just prefer to "I have to make a scene so the entire area is looking at me, not just one or two random guys". Offer to buy those types a long sleeved shirt when they start their routine, it really throws them off their game and they usually have no clue how to respond.

spamdog: If you're attractive, you can look.

If you're unattractive, you can't.

THIS. One only wants what one wants.

stainedglassdoll:

"Touch it"? Do you have a single tooth?

No. Teeth. Plural. I have nearly 10.

Julie Cochrane:
I saw where you said you're attractive. I dunno, dude. You've...I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you've got a pretty bad pixelation problem with your face. Sorry...

I think it's not just "don't be ugly." I think it's "have some social clue." And social clue isn't what people think it is. As far as cluefulness for men on interacting with women socially in a "spark" sense, I recommend David DeAngelo.

...

Yeah, wow. I signed up for David DeAngelo's newsletter too and read it intently for years. It was fascinating and I saw that quite a few friends were using it with varying, though mostly successful, outcomes.

I couldn't bring myself to try it though.

The thought of interacting with women under the false pretenses of an assumed personality and style as an instigator for what I hoped may lead to a meaningful long-term relationship seemed like a bad idea. It's like selling a person a Ferrari and then delivering a Ford.

I am physically hideous and a complete eccentric, self-effacing and strange. By putting myself out there as "cocky and funny" I would be presenting myself as something I'm not. Doing what he espouses would be such a grand departure from who I am that I felt like I was committing a fraud and putting myself in a position where I would have to commit to a life of presenting this fraud for anything that initiated from it, and any relationship based upon a foundation of fraud is doomed. Furthermore, I suspected that any woman who fell for this would probably not be the sort of woman who would be in the slightest bit interested in the real me. Also, I was certain that the women who were receptive to "cocky and funny" were likely worth nothing more than a meaningless hookup. Over time I learned that his techniques are pretty much universally acceptable and work on all women. That's when I knew I'd die alone.

Fecacacophany: Julie Cochrane:
I saw where you said you're attractive. I dunno, dude. You've...I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you've got a pretty bad pixelation problem with your face. Sorry...

I think it's not just "don't be ugly." I think it's "have some social clue." And social clue isn't what people think it is. As far as cluefulness for men on interacting with women socially in a "spark" sense, I recommend David DeAngelo.

...

Yeah, wow. I signed up for David DeAngelo's newsletter too and read it intently for years. It was fascinating and I saw that quite a few friends were using it with varying, though mostly successful, outcomes.

I couldn't bring myself to try it though.

The thought of interacting with women under the false pretenses of an assumed personality and style as an instigator for what I hoped may lead to a meaningful long-term relationship seemed like a bad idea. It's like selling a person a Ferrari and then delivering a Ford.

I am physically hideous and a complete eccentric, self-effacing and strange. By putting myself out there as "cocky and funny" I would be presenting myself as something I'm not. Doing what he espouses would be such a grand departure from who I am that I felt like I was committing a fraud and putting myself in a position where I would have to commit to a life of presenting this fraud for anything that initiated from it, and any relationship based upon a foundation of fraud is doomed. Furthermore, I suspected that any woman who fell for this would probably not be the sort of woman who would be in the slightest bit interested in the real me. Also, I was certain that the women who were receptive to "cocky and funny" were likely worth nothing more than a meaningless hookup. Over time I learned that his techniques are pretty much universally acceptable and work on all women. That's when I knew I'd die alone.

Yay for David DeAngelo SPAM.

Don't fall for that snake oil, guys. It's all bullshiat.

hasty ambush: Why Men Stare NSFW (new window)

Oh, that is Epic.

Scroll down to the last pic.
It's GD.

Women don't like it when men THAT THEY ARE NOT ATTRACTED TO stare at them. Otherwise, they love the attention.

abfalter: Women don't like it when men THAT THEY ARE NOT ATTRACTED TO stare at them. Otherwise, they love the attention.

My wife on the other hand is a slut who totally loves getting ogled by anyone.

Moonfisher: Psh. When I was young and attractive, I let a large amount of cleavage hang out and I enjoyed the gazes. Anybody complaining needs to not put the merchandise on display if they don't like window shoppers. People can't help looking at pretty things if you dangle them in front of their faces.

Matter of fact, I suspect most of the women who expose themselves and then complain about gazes are full of shiat. They WANT the attention, then complain about it to either appear less slutty or convince others that they are desirable.

Or to draw even more attention to their cleavage, ass, do-me shoes, legs, or whatever their schtick may be (that day).

I love cute shoes. Adore them. But you do not wear shoes guaranteed to make a foot fetishist's boner bruise the base of his chin if you don't want him to stare at you.

And, truly, as long as the guy is not skulking around with a rusty van and a roll of duct tape, where's the harm? If the drops of drool land on the pavement and not on the faux suede of those cute black suede and patent ankle boots I found at Payless, of all places----no harm no foul.

The thing is, everyone's a balance of yin and yang. Nobody's absolutely one or the other, and women and men both function better if they're a bit more towards the balanced, sensible middle of their gender than if they're exaggeratedly hyper masculine or exaggeratedly hyper feminine.

The more overbalanced a gal is towards the yin side of things, the less she understands that there's a world of difference between a guy's appreciation, or even frankly horny eyes, versus actual intent.

Sane and normal guys, unless they come from a culture where everything is covered up, do not assume that a pretty window display means they can have what's in the window. They may assume that it might be available and that they should risk asking, but they're not going to be surprised, shocked or get a case of the ass at a polite rejection.

But someone with an overbalance of yin may get scared or just not understand guys enough to understand that their ocular attention is not dangerous per se--and, again, isn't an expression of intent to go out horndogging. Not in itself. Looking is just looking.

Then there are the women who are pissed off at men who use male attention as an excuse to get a case of the ass. You can't really do anything about them, because an angry person with a grudge is going to find something to biatch about no matter what you do.