FARK.com: (7013775) Kevin Smith on Bruce Willis: "He turned out to be the unhappiest, most bitter and meanest emo-biatch I ever met at any job I've held. And mind you, I worked at Domino's"

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		Kevin Smith on Bruce Willis: "He turned out to be the unhappiest, most bitter and meanest emo-biatch I ever met at any job I've held. And mind you, I worked at Domino's" (dailystab.com)		61
		More: Interesting, Bruce Willis, emo, kicks

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19319 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 25 Mar 2012 at 4:24 PM | Favorite | share:

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limboslam		2012-03-25 05:08:56 PM

6 votes:

FTFA: This is not Kevin's first time slamming Willis, back in January of last year he complained about the actor during an interview for comedian Marc Maron's podcast.

Let me get this straight: Kevin Smith knows Marc Maron, and he's saying Bruce Willis is the unhappiest, most bitter emo biatch he ever met?

EyeballKid		2012-03-25 04:58:15 PM

6 votes:

"Did you know that some actors turn down roles?"

indarwinsshadow		2012-03-25 04:39:28 PM

4 votes:

Ed Finnerty: He sounds angry. And fat.

Sounds like half of fark. Except they have cats.

Klippoklondike		2012-03-25 02:06:05 PM

4 votes:

Kevin Smith talking shiat about someone, must be a day that ends in y. That guy holds grudges like nobody's business.

salvador.hardin		2012-03-25 05:32:13 PM

3 votes:

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Kevin Smith is not John McClane.

Advantage: Bruce Willis.

Kevin Smith had less screen time in Live Free or Die Hard

Advantage: Kevin Smith

MagSeven		2012-03-25 05:29:49 PM

3 votes:

TravisBickle62: I work with Willis (his friends call him Bruno) and this all came about over a vending machine that had exactly one bag of Peanut M & M's left in it, and Bruno got there first.

I had a buddy working at a club where Willis was playing with his band, Bruce Willis and The Accelerators. He was kind of a dick to the staff and at the end of the night the buddy walked up talked to the band and thanked them for playing, shaking their hands. He finally got to Willis and said "Holy Shiat!, I didn't know YOU were in the Accelerators!" He said Willis gave him a John Mcclaine look and just walked away. The band had a good laugh.

Gunderson		2012-03-25 05:23:24 PM

3 votes:

T-Servo: Who the fark is Kevin Smith?

Will Smith's brother. You know, the Asian dude who played Charlie Chan in the movie "Clue"

Antidamascus		2012-03-25 05:14:33 PM

3 votes:

/hot

GreenAdder		2012-03-25 02:28:47 PM

3 votes:

He deleted the tweets? That sounds like a complete cop-out (new window).

Ed Finnerty		2012-03-25 02:13:37 PM

3 votes:

He sounds angry. And fat.

Bag of Hammers		2012-03-26 11:02:11 AM

2 votes:

Bruce Willis can still find his dick without a mirror.

Advantage: Willis.

Thanks for the Meme-ries		2012-03-26 01:01:46 AM

2 votes:

hbk72777: I'd be pissed off too if I was 0 for 3 on having a good looking daughter

[img2.timeinc.net image 400x400]

[encrypted-tbn1.google.com image 183x275]

[encrypted-tbn2.google.com image 194x259]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 640x886]

i291.photobucket.com

FuryOfFirestorm		2012-03-25 11:41:53 PM

2 votes:

hbk72777: I'd be pissed off too if I was 0 for 3 on having a good looking daughter

[img2.timeinc.net image 400x400]

The girl on the right has a face that slants down on one side. Demi Moore must have secretly cheated on Bruce with a Picasso painting.

SavageWombat		2012-03-25 10:12:57 PM

2 votes:

Big John's Breakfast Log		2012-03-25 09:39:55 PM

2 votes:

Despite what some of you think of his physique or directing skills, Kevin Smith is a great writer. And an entertaining public speaker/storyteller.

I like the guy. I probably shouldn't, but I do. And yes, I also like Comic Book Men. It entertains me. I wasn't expecting deep life-changing moments of brilliant originality. I wanted a bunch of self-professed geeks shooting the shiat, cracking wise, and busting each other's chops. And that's what they delivered.

I don't hug Smith's nuts, but I will smell them from a distance if the wind is blowing right.

Surool		2012-03-25 08:24:39 PM

2 votes:

The irony is that all of the Smith bashers in this thread are to Kevin Smith what Kevin Smith is to Bruce Willis.

Gunderson		2012-03-25 07:52:50 PM

2 votes:

Advantage: Kevin Smith

GreenAdder		2012-03-25 06:57:01 PM

2 votes:

Kevin Smith is only mad because he has no idea what Willis is talking about.

MagSeven		2012-03-25 06:33:37 PM

2 votes:

rocinante721: I have little respect for Smith after his passive/agressive sabotage of a joint Smith-Adam Carolla show that cost Adam half-a-million dollars & his idiotic defense he did on Carolla's podcast.

Tsar_Bomba1: rocinante721: I have little respect for Smith after his passive/agressive sabotage of a joint Smith-Adam Carolla show that cost Adam half-a-million dollars & his idiotic defense he did on Carolla's podcast.

What was the deal with that anyway? I'll I've seen was a one-sided argument in favor of Smith.

I just listened to the Carolla podcast where he hashes this out with Smith. From my conclusions, the deal tanked because Carolla isn't "computer savvy" enough to reliably use e-mail.

zombiegoat		2012-03-25 05:54:59 PM

2 votes:

Deleted tweets: the true mark of standing by what you said.

laid back w/bud light		2012-03-25 05:48:40 PM

2 votes:

If you're so fat all you can wear is NHL goalie sized uniforms you might wanna' lay off the weed and lard.

four95		2012-03-25 05:35:25 PM

2 votes:

Anybody notice the guy in the upper right corner?

farm8.staticflickr.com

robsul82		2012-03-25 05:20:40 PM

2 votes:

Oooh, wrong tab by a lot, lol. Exsqueeze me.

robsul82		2012-03-25 05:20:05 PM

2 votes:

Carolina 3 to tie it up at 19.

TravisBickle62		2012-03-25 05:12:23 PM

2 votes:

I work with Willis (his friends call him Bruno) and this all came about over a vending machine that had exactly one bag of Peanut M & M's left in it, and Bruno got there first.

BilltheThrill		2012-03-25 04:37:14 PM

2 votes:

Clerks, Chasing Amy, and to a lesser extent Mallrats, were all movies about whiny, unhappy, bitter little biatches. If what Smith says is true, add some weed and comics jokes, and McClain can star in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Backier.

Mugato		2012-03-25 03:02:07 PM

2 votes:

This is from someone who made an entire movie (Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) making fun of, deriding and finally beating people up for criticizing others on the Internet. Talk about dishing it out and not being able to take it.

/likes Smith's Jay and Silent Bob movies
//the guy himself seems like a whiny dick

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-03-25 02:18:08 PM

2 votes:

Kevin Smith is not John McClane.

Advantage: Bruce Willis.

cryinoutloud		2012-03-25 02:14:41 PM

2 votes:

Go smoke some more doobage, Kevin, and get over it. You sound like a 16-year-old.

SharkaPult		2012-03-26 02:43:56 PM

1 votes:

saintstryfe: the number of people alone quoting lines from a 12 year old animated show that ran for two episodes gives me hope that there's a market for this show

In random moments of silence my friends will still say crap like "OH NO, BEAR IS DRIVING!" The Clerks Cartoon was a lot of fun. Brilliant in its own way.

/Last week, on Clerks: Test pattern and BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
//Hilarious intro to the first episode.

BEER STEAK		2012-03-26 12:42:01 PM

1 votes:

For the record, the Fifth Element is a terrible movie.

SockMonkeyHolocaust		2012-03-26 09:18:50 AM

1 votes:

Saying Clerks gave a voice to while male underachievers who experience episodic wackiness throughout their retail day job is like saying Vanilla Ice finally proved that white people could rap. I guess you're right but do you really want to be?

Jim_Callahan		2012-03-26 02:24:04 AM

1 votes:

EyeballKid: Advantage: anybody who's never seen Hudson Hawk, The Bonfire of the Vanities, The Last Boy Scout, Striking Distance, Color of Night, The Jackal, Mercury Rising, The Kid, Bandits, Hart's War, The Whole Nine Yards, The Whole Ten Yards...

Most of those were quite good, or at least very entertaining. Or is that the point of some joke that's just falling flat?

galactus5000		2012-03-26 02:12:14 AM

1 votes:

Eapoe6: Clerks was not good. I am sorry. The movie looked like crap. The story was crap. The acting was crap. The directing was crap that had dried in the hot sun. Anyone who refutes this, I defy you to watch that movie again and not conclude the same or worse.
The fat bastard sold his soul to satan or something, because his lack of talent sucks the joy from children within in a 5 mile radius of his rotund form. I sometimes imagine a world where Kevin Smith never existed. I sometimes imagine a world where media demigods did not elevate that corpulent, talentless troglodyte from the depths of Red Bank NJ.

I don't even like Bruce Willis. I just felt that needed to be said. I mean we could have been spared all his subsequent movies if only someone stood up and declared, "Clerks Sucks" back in the mid 90s.

Please join me in declaring "CLERKS SUCKS"

Can we just all agree that your opinion is worthless and move on with our lives instead?

DontMakeMeComeBackThere		2012-03-25 11:59:05 PM

1 votes:

You guys can White Knight Brice Willis all you want - he's never going to be your buddy.

Am I doing the accusatory White Knight thing right?

GreenAdder		2012-03-25 09:39:58 PM

1 votes:

If I remember correctly, didn't Smith only work at Domino's for one day, then quit unceremoniously because he wanted to watch Tim Burton's Batman flick?

zez		2012-03-25 08:57:04 PM

1 votes:

mhd: robsul82: I know you're not saying a one-note actor like Bruce Willis "outclassed" Raylan Givens, son.

Given that Olyphant is basically the definition of one-note...

/But hey, it's a heckuva good note

showclix.com

salvador.hardin		2012-03-25 08:32:35 PM

1 votes:

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Die Hard 3 was awesome.

Advantage: Samuel L. Jackson

Firstly, Jeremy Irons was far more entertaining than Sam Jackson. Secondly that movie would have been a train wreck of over-complicated plotting if it hadn't been paced so well.

Advantage: Editor

/too lazy to IMDB it.

fusillade762		2012-03-25 08:16:16 PM

1 votes:

LEAVE KEVIN SMITH ALONE!

trotsky		2012-03-25 07:44:14 PM

1 votes:

Knight of the Woeful Countenance: Bruce Willis was a hero to Kevin Smith before he worked with him.

Take it from me, you never want to meet your heroes, and you damn sure should NEVER work for them.

THIS. I met a few of my "heroes" while working at celeb autographs and the con scene. Trust me, it ain't worth it.

/Dirk Benedict is bitter and old.

proteon		2012-03-25 07:30:34 PM

1 votes:

downtownkid: proteon: I've enjoyed more Bruce Willis movies than I have Kevin Smith movies. Also I met and drank with Bruce. Also Kevin doesn't change his shirt and I don't trust a guy who never changes his shirt.

So you and Bruce hang out? You are pals? He regales people with hilarious anecdotes about the great times he's had with you?

I doubt it but I did pee in his toilet and eat right out of his fridge and he was home. For one dollar you can touch me - paypal only.

Surool		2012-03-25 07:29:18 PM

1 votes:

Shakes999: robsul82: bhcompy: Color of Night, 12 Monkeys, Unbreakable, Hostage, Sin City, Tears of the Sun, etc

Color of Night? Are you shiatting me, lol, the "erotic thriller" of Bruno's career? The others are crappy action movies and it's not like he was terribly impressive in 12 Monkeys or Unbreakable.

I still hold to this day that "Unbreakable" is the worst movie released in the last 50 years.

You need to get out more.

Mugato		2012-03-25 07:12:57 PM

1 votes:

FeedTheCollapse: to be fair, this is probably true. Not that it would've necessarily set the box office alight, a movie entitled "Zack and Miri Make a Porno" was probably going to be a tough sell for marketing.

Then he should blame himself for putting the word "Porno" in a mainstream movie. The guys from Mad Men couldn't do anything with that. And it also wasn't funny, which didn't help.

farking up a Seth Rogan comedy is kind of like....farking up a Bruce Willis cop movie. Again I mean box office, not quality.

TeddyRooseveltsMustache		2012-03-25 07:12:35 PM

1 votes:

Die Hard 3 was awesome.

Advantage: Samuel L. Jackson

Knight of the Woeful Countenance		2012-03-25 06:59:32 PM

1 votes:

Bruce Willis was a hero to Kevin Smith before he worked with him.

Take it from me, you never want to meet your heroes, and you damn sure should NEVER work for them.

Mugato		2012-03-25 06:51:37 PM

1 votes:

Shakes999: I still hold to this day that "Unbreakable" is the worst movie released in the last 50 years.

It's not even M Night's 6th worst film.

Christian Bale		2012-03-25 06:30:23 PM

1 votes:

Antidamascus: [art.penny-arcade.com image 640x325]

/hot

and, still, never seen a funny Penny Arcade, out of 10 million posted to Fark threads.

bravian		2012-03-25 06:24:04 PM

1 votes:

bhcompy: I like Olyphant, but he is pretty much only good at playing smarmy assholes and smarmy asshole cowboys. Willis indeed is good at action and drama, and not too bad at comedy either.

www.homorazzi.com

Advantage: Timothy Olyphant

/and his fark'n great in Justified

bhcompy		2012-03-25 06:21:17 PM

1 votes:

Six_By_Nine: Klippoklondike: Bruce Willis was in 5th Element: Advantage, Willis

Hell, Luke Perry gets an advantage for that movie. And he ain't even in this fight.

//Would not give advantage to Chris Tucker, though. No sir.

Fark you, he was born for that character. Worked so goddamned well

CoonAce		2012-03-25 05:50:26 PM

1 votes:

Being the grotesque specimen of an obese slob that Kevin Smith is, the M&Ms grudge sounds about right.

Mugato		2012-03-25 05:46:38 PM

1 votes:

king of vegas: Tiger Woods is another known stiff as well. Willis and Woods are not liked by service industry personnel in Vegas. That much I know.

If that's true, that's farked up. I'm a generous tipper and I'm poor.

Mugato		2012-03-25 05:39:10 PM

1 votes:

nanim: Geez, if he ever quits smoking he'll really blow up.

And if he doesn't, his ticker will.

/biatch got huge after he became a stoner

nanim		2012-03-25 05:31:58 PM

1 votes:

s1ugg0:... 'I look around and there is Kevin Smith having a smoke.'

Kevin Smith is that big, even tho he smokes?
Geez, if he ever quits smoking he'll really blow up.

eta:
T-Servo: 'Who the fark is Kevin Smith?'
Not Sure If Serious, but just in case, here's a link to recent news:
indie dir Kevin Smith vs. SouthWest airlines (new window)

Mugato		2012-03-25 05:10:49 PM

1 votes:

STRYPERSWINE: His frequent rants about Willis are always funny, but 90% of the ones I've heard, Smith was the one in the wrong.

He had a story about how Willis asked him what lens he was going to use for a shot and Smith said something like, "the middle shot one" and Willis seemed peeved that he didn't know the number and Smith was acting like Willis was the asshole. Excuse the fark out of him for being used to working with directors who know WTF they're doing.

I actually don't blame Smith for Cop Out. He was offered the gig and of course he took it, who wouldn't. I blame whoever hired him. Like I said, I like his earlier comedies but his resume doesn't exactly scream "Bruce Willis action/comedy". He didn't even learn that you can move the camera until Dogma.

SN1987a goes boom		2012-03-25 05:07:01 PM

1 votes:

Hmm, two people I'd never want to be in the same room with starting a pissing match.

/Have fun boys.

sirrerun		2012-03-25 05:01:24 PM

1 votes:

macadamnut: I've enjoyed (or not) each of their movies about equally on balance, but I'll take the idiot man-child over the crypto-nazi creep, thanks.

OK, so which is which?

s1ugg0		2012-03-25 04:47:39 PM

1 votes:

Klippoklondike: Kevin Smith talking shiat about someone, must be a day that ends in y. That guy holds grudges like nobody's business.

CSB time

When I was in college I was working part time for an AV Company to pay for school. We got a gig setting up sound gear and video projectors for this event he was having in Red Bank. We drove down in some nasty weather so we ended up setting up late. Once everything was plugged in and the boss man was doing his checks I decided to go grab a smoke. I walk outside and realize I left my smokes back at the shop. I look around and there is Kevin Smith having a smoke. So I ask to bum one and he was nice enough to share.

We stood there having a perfectly friendly conversation. Guy couldn't be nicer. After I bit I say to him, "I hate to be that guy but I'm a fan of your work." And he turns to me and goes "I'm a fan of you guys coming down despite the bad weather. Thanks." Guy couldn't have been nicer to a punk kid.

So maybe he's got his reasons and maybe he doesn't. But the one time I met him face to face he was a stand up guy.

Flappyhead		2012-03-25 04:47:25 PM

1 votes:

Let me guess, it won't be his fault when this blows up in his face.

Rafe		2012-03-25 04:35:43 PM

1 votes:

See, it's stuff like this that has led my Smith fandom to diminish steadily over the past few years. Sure, he frequently admits to being a gossipy bint, but it still doesn't change the fact that he's often worse than the clucking hens on The View/The Talk/The Mind-Numbing Queef.