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(ABC)   In a Roswell, New Mexico visit by President Obama, he opens with "I come in peace." Clearly, Mr. Obama's home planet is much further away than Kenya   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 123
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4415 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Mar 2012 at 2:49 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-03-22 01:18:34 PM  
Hilarious.
 
2012-03-22 01:49:40 PM  
"Take me to your leader, and have him show me his long-form birth certificate."
 
2012-03-22 01:54:04 PM  
Feh. A real geek would have said, "Klaatu barada nikto". Although some dumbasses would think he was speaking Swahili.
 
2012-03-22 02:06:02 PM  
SOMEONE SET US UP THE SANTORUM
 
2012-03-22 02:13:48 PM  
"Where is the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth shattering kaboom."
 
2012-03-22 02:14:57 PM  
Oh, even better - "Welcome to Erf!"
 
2012-03-22 02:50:53 PM  
"Let me tell you, there are more nine and ten-year-old boys around the country, when I meet them they ask me, 'Have you been to Roswell?' and, 'Is it true what they say?' And I tell them, 'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' And their eyes get all big," he said.

HE'S THREATENING TO KILL OUR CHILDREN.
 
2012-03-22 02:52:28 PM  
"I find it discouraging and a bit depressing when I notice the unequal treatment afforded by the media to UFO believers on the one hand, and on the other, to those who believe in an invisible supreme being who inhabits the sky. Especially as the latter belief applies to the whole Jesus-Messiah-Son-of-God fable.

You may have noticed that, in the media, UFO believers are usually referred to as buffs, a term used to diminish and marginalize them by relegating them to the ranks of hobbyists and mere enthusiasts. They are made to seem like kooks and quaint dingbats who have the nerve to believe that, in an observable universe of trillions upon trillions of stars, and most likely many hundreds of billions of potentially inhabitable planets, some of those planets may have produced life-forms capable of doing things that we can't do.

What nerve.

On the other hand those who believe in an eternal, all-powerful being, a being who demands to be loved and adored unconditionally and who punishes and rewards according to his whims are thought to be worthy, upright, credible people. This, in spite of the large numbers of believers who are clearly close-minded fanatics.

To my way of thinking, there is every bit as much evidence for the existence of UFOs as there is for the existence of God. Probably far more. At least in the case of UFOs there have been countless taped and filmed and, by the way, unexplained sightings from all over the world, along with documented radar evidence seen by experienced military and civilian radar operators.

This does not even begin to include the widespread testimony of not only highly trained, experienced military and civilian pilots who are selected for their jobs, in part, for their above-average eyesight and mental stability, but also of equally well-trained, experienced law-enforcement officers. Such pilots and law-enforcement people are known to be serious, sober individuals who would have a lot to lose were they to be associated with anything resembling kooky, outlandish beliefs. Nonetheless, they have taken the risk of revealing their experiences because they are convinced they have seen something objectively real that they consider important. All of these accounts are ignored by the media.

Granted, the world of UFO-belief has its share of kooks, nuts and fringe people, but have you ever listened to some of these religious true-believers? Have you ever heard of any extreme, bizarre behavior and outlandish claims associated with religious zealots? Could any of them be considered kooks, nuts or dingbats? A fair person would have to say yes.

But the marginal people in these two groups don't matter in this argument. What matters is the prejudice and superstition built into the media coverage of the two sets of beliefs. One is treated reverently and accepted as received truth, the other is treated laughingly and dismissed out of hand.

As evidence of the above premise, I offer one version of a typical television news story heard each year on the final Friday of Lent:

"Today is Good Friday, observed by Christians worldwide as a day that commemorates the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, whose death redeemed the sins of mankind."

Here is the way it should be written:

"Today is Good Friday, observed worldwide by Jesus buffs as the day on which the popular, bearded cultural figure, sometimes referred to as The Messiah, was allegedly crucified and according to legend died for mankind's so-called sins. Today kicks off a 'holy' weekend that culminates on Easter Sunday, when, it is widely believed, this dead 'savior' who also, by the way, claimed to be the son of a sky-dwelling, invisible being known as God, mysteriously 'rose from the dead.' According to the legend, by volunteering to be killed and actually going through with it, Jesus saved every person who has ever lived and every person who ever will live from an eternity of suffering in a fiery region popularly known as hell, providing so the story goes that the person to be 'saved' firmly believes this rather fanciful tale."

That would be an example of unbiased news reporting. Don't wait around for it to happen. The aliens will land first."
 
2012-03-22 02:52:47 PM  
He will immediately be criticized by the GOP for being a hippie.

/what message does that send to our enemies "Mr." "President"?
 
2012-03-22 02:53:36 PM  
I admit it, if I were President and giving a speech in Roswell I'd be a way cornier bastard than that.
 
2012-03-22 02:53:57 PM  
Welcome to (Muslim socialist Marxist fascist) erf!
 
2012-03-22 02:54:54 PM  
He's no alien.

He's a Man in Black.
 
2012-03-22 02:55:46 PM  
"Let me tell you, there are more nine and ten-year-old boys around the country, when I meet them they ask me, 'Have you been to Roswell?' and, 'Is it true what they say?' And I tell them, 'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' And their eyes get all big," he said.

"So, we're going to keep our secrets here."



I love this guy, he's so funny. He has a Fark sense of humor.
 
2012-03-22 02:55:52 PM  

rufus-t-firefly: "Let me tell you, there are more nine and ten-year-old boys around the country, when I meet them they ask me, 'Have you been to Roswell?' and, 'Is it true what they say?' And I tell them, 'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' And their eyes get all big," he said.

HE'S THREATENING TO KILL OUR CHILDREN.


No way he actually... ha ha oh wow.
 
2012-03-22 02:56:43 PM  

SphericalTime: Hilarious.


Came to say exactly that. Good on him... or his speech writer. Wish I could give his comment the "funny" vote.
 
2012-03-22 02:57:10 PM  
img.photobucket.com


/what a bad movie that was
 
2012-03-22 02:57:18 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-03-22 02:57:22 PM  

I_C_Weener: "Where is the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth shattering kaboom."


Thread over, we have a winner.
 
2012-03-22 02:58:26 PM  
Then he followed up with "all your base are belong to us".
 
2012-03-22 02:59:18 PM  

Diogenes: Feh. A real geek would have said, "Klaatu barada nikto". Although some dumbasses would think he was speaking Swahili.


Necter?... Necktie?... It was definately an N word!
 
2012-03-22 02:59:28 PM  
Roswell smells like cow poop. It's surrounded by dairy farms. Which is why the aliens landed there in the first place.


southparkstudios-intl.mtvnimages.com
 
2012-03-22 02:59:42 PM  
But can he speak any of the three Minbari dialects? Hmm? :P
 
2012-03-22 03:00:24 PM  

FarkinHostile: [img.photobucket.com image 500x500]


/what a bad movie that was


I thought of that as well.
 
2012-03-22 03:01:17 PM  

Walker: "Let me tell you, there are more nine and ten-year-old boys around the country, when I meet them they ask me, 'Have you been to Roswell?' and, 'Is it true what they say?' And I tell them, 'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' And their eyes get all big," he said.

"So, we're going to keep our secrets here."


I love this guy, he's so funny. He has a Fark sense of humor.


Check out his 2008 Al Smith dinner speech. While McCain ultimately won that round (his bit on the Clintons had me in tears - the man was on fire that night), Obama did a great job too.

/Obama wasn't born in a manger
//He's from the planet krypton
 
2012-03-22 03:01:34 PM  
The he marklared his marklar and told his marklar to marklar the marklar out of those marklars.
 
2012-03-22 03:01:42 PM  

spacelord321: Necter?... Necktie?... It was definately an N word!


Racist.
 
2012-03-22 03:03:19 PM  

CPennypacker: "I find it discouraging and a bit depressing when I notice the unequal treatment afforded by the media to UFO believers on the one hand, and on the other, to those who believe in an invisible supreme being who inhabits the sky. Especially as the latter belief applies to the whole Jesus-Messiah-Son-of-God fable.

You may have noticed that, in the media, UFO believers are usually referred to as buffs, a term used to diminish and marginalize them by relegating them to the ranks of hobbyists and mere enthusiasts. They are made to seem like kooks and quaint dingbats who have the nerve to believe that, in an observable universe of trillions upon trillions of stars, and most likely many hundreds of billions of potentially inhabitable planets, some of those planets may have produced life-forms capable of doing things that we can't do.

What nerve.

On the other hand those who believe in an eternal, all-powerful being, a being who demands to be loved and adored unconditionally and who punishes and rewards according to his whims are thought to be worthy, upright, credible people. This, in spite of the large numbers of believers who are clearly close-minded fanatics.

To my way of thinking, there is every bit as much evidence for the existence of UFOs as there is for the existence of God. Probably far more. At least in the case of UFOs there have been countless taped and filmed and, by the way, unexplained sightings from all over the world, along with documented radar evidence seen by experienced military and civilian radar operators.

This does not even begin to include the widespread testimony of not only highly trained, experienced military and civilian pilots who are selected for their jobs, in part, for their above-average eyesight and mental stability, but also of equally well-trained, experienced law-enforcement officers. Such pilots and law-enforcement people are known to be serious, sober individuals who would have a lot to lose were they to be associated with anythin ...


Unemployed?
 
2012-03-22 03:03:32 PM  
i.ytimg.com

"Back in those glory days, I was very uncomfortable when they asked us to say things we didn't want to say and deny other things. Some people asked, you know, were you alone out there? We never gave the real answer, and yet we see things out there, strange things, but we know what we saw out there. And we couldn't really say anything. The bosses were really afraid of this, they were afraid of the War of the Worlds type stuff, and about panic in the streets. So, we had to keep quiet. And now we only see these things in our nightmares or maybe in the movies, and some of them are pretty close to being the truth."
 
2012-03-22 03:04:06 PM  
"Farther" describes actual distance. "Further" is more figurative.

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-03-22 03:04:26 PM  

spacelord321: Unemployed?


Huh? Its a George Carlin quote I pasted
 
2012-03-22 03:04:32 PM  

Diogenes: Feh. A real geek would have said, "Klaatu barada nikto". Although some dumbasses would think he was speaking Swahili.


No, a double-secret geek would have said "I will not beard anyone".

barada nikto = борода никто = beard no one.

Evidence that Klaatu was actually a commie bastard, and Gort was your typical Godless, mindless robot follower, a true "New Soviet Man".
 
2012-03-22 03:04:51 PM  
Good one, Pres
 
2012-03-22 03:04:51 PM  

CPennypacker: You may have noticed that, in the media, UFO believers are usually referred to as buffs, a term used to diminish and marginalize them by relegating them to the ranks of hobbyists and mere enthusiasts. They are made to seem like kooks and quaint dingbats who have the nerve to believe that, in an observable universe of trillions upon trillions of stars, and most likely many hundreds of billions of potentially inhabitable planets, some of those planets may have produced life-forms capable of doing things that we can't do.


No, UFO crackpots are people that believe that those other peoples have visited Earth, arbitrarily harassed random people, and then left without doing anything meaningful or being noticed by any of our zillion detection systems. The italicized stuff is why they're farking stupid, even in excess of religious people (who at least have a fairly consistent rationale for why their god isn't around anymore rather than a string of weak excuses).
 
2012-03-22 03:06:15 PM  

Jim_Callahan: CPennypacker: You may have noticed that, in the media, UFO believers are usually referred to as buffs, a term used to diminish and marginalize them by relegating them to the ranks of hobbyists and mere enthusiasts. They are made to seem like kooks and quaint dingbats who have the nerve to believe that, in an observable universe of trillions upon trillions of stars, and most likely many hundreds of billions of potentially inhabitable planets, some of those planets may have produced life-forms capable of doing things that we can't do.

No, UFO crackpots are people that believe that those other peoples have visited Earth, arbitrarily harassed random people, and then left without doing anything meaningful or being noticed by any of our zillion detection systems. The italicized stuff is why they're farking stupid, even in excess of religious people (who at least have a fairly consistent rationale for why their god isn't around anymore rather than a string of weak excuses).


you've gotten really angry recently. Wife stop going downtown?
 
2012-03-22 03:06:23 PM  

Jim_Callahan: even in excess of religious people (who at least have a fairly consistent rationale for why their god isn't around anymore rather than a string of weak excuses).


That's a mighty subjective bit of territory right there. What if I find "Yeah god is still there, but he doesn't do anything or show anything because... faith" to be pretty weak?
 
2012-03-22 03:06:34 PM  
Ever try asking a Border Patrol why they don't hang out near Roswell? I have.

They do sell cook books where the drivers licenses are.


i243.photobucket.com
 
2012-03-22 03:06:54 PM  
ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2012-03-22 03:10:40 PM  

MouserMusing: http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31GJD7FT2DL._SX320_SY240_.jpg


That's just begging for "Dinner, please" caption.
 
2012-03-22 03:10:40 PM  

Diogenes: Feh. A real geek would have said, "Klaatu barada nikto". Although some dumbasses would think he was speaking Swahili.


Considering the cultural awareness of the average teabagger, I think it'd be more likely they'd claim he was speaking Kenyan.
 
2012-03-22 03:12:48 PM  

PanicMan: rufus-t-firefly: "Let me tell you, there are more nine and ten-year-old boys around the country, when I meet them they ask me, 'Have you been to Roswell?' and, 'Is it true what they say?' And I tell them, 'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' And their eyes get all big," he said.

HE'S THREATENING TO KILL OUR CHILDREN.

No way he actually... ha ha oh wow.


How long will it take someone to freak out over that quote?
 
2012-03-22 03:12:59 PM  

CPennypacker: spacelord321: Unemployed?

Huh? Its a George Carlin quote I pasted


Just teasing about the length of the post. Between jobs myself. Start a new job next week and I'm knawin' at the bit. Set myself up so I didn't have to collect.

/NTTAWWT
/Obama thread, so I should be safe
 
2012-03-22 03:13:30 PM  

Diogenes: Feh. A real geek would have said, "Klaatu barada nikto".


Umm, that's not exactly an opening line. "Hey Gort! Your boss says stop destroying shiat!"

Besides, why would a Kenyan Muslin want to quote from a movie that's obviously a re-telling of the Jesus story?

I mean, c'mon! Klaatu takes up the name "Carpenter", and is raised from the dead? And makes a promise to return, with a warning that if the world doesn't get its collective act together, it will be reduced to a "burned out cinder"?

No way he'd reference that.

(And green really is your color. You looked stunning in that gown, even with the 80s hairdo.)
 
2012-03-22 03:14:06 PM  

paidhima: spacelord321: Necter?... Necktie?... It was definately an N word!

Racist.


I walked right into that one.
 
2012-03-22 03:14:51 PM  
At least moderates and liberals have a sense of humor.

For example; when I think about more serious things, like the need to project our power accross the globe, I am waaaay more serious.

Butsects jokes - liberal.

Keeping easily produced life saving medications out of the hands of the needy in the third world - conservative.
 
2012-03-22 03:15:26 PM  

Crotchrocket Slim: I admit it, if I were President and giving a speech in Roswell I'd be a way cornier bastard than that.


Yeah, throw in an ear tug and say, "Nanu nanu," somewhere in the middle of the speech, and then do a Vulcan salute and say, "Live long and prosper," at the end of the speech.
 
2012-03-22 03:16:08 PM  
cache.io9.com
/oblig
 
2012-03-22 03:19:32 PM  

Jim_Callahan: No, UFO crackpots are people that believe that those other peoples have visited Earth, arbitrarily harassed random people, and then left without doing anything meaningful or being noticed by any of our zillion detection systems. The italicized stuff is why they're farking stupid, even in excess of religious people (who at least have a fairly consistent rationale for why their god isn't around anymore rather than a string of weak excuses).


I knock on UFO people more than I knock on religious people because while (most) religious people openly admit that their beliefs are not congruent with science, UFO people profess to use science to support their beliefs while simultaneously ignoring any scientific evidence that contradicts their beliefs. You don't get to use the 'billions of stars and planets' thing while also ignoring the 'speed of light' thing.

However, the comparison is largely one of semantics, because as everyone knows:
Jesus was an extraterrestrial.
 
2012-03-22 03:21:19 PM  
i12.photobucket.com
 
2012-03-22 03:21:46 PM  
This is a great example of why Obama will crush Romeny.
 
2012-03-22 03:22:02 PM  
some of the comments below that story scare the hell out of me
 
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