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(Houston Press)   Bacon, eggs, cheese and other American foods that foreigners just don't understand   (blogs.houstonpress.com) divider line 468
    More: Interesting, Americans, biscuits and gravy, Jell-O  
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23850 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Mar 2012 at 1:15 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-03-22 05:33:25 AM
Genevieve from France sounds really, really dumb. You had a 4-exclamation mark epiphany when you realized you could eat something else instead? Why do you have to wake up so early to do that again?

Also this seems to be just foods that people from around the world find weird. I knew right away it would be a Chinese person going on about cheese because I work with does all of the time. Many of the foods have origins in Europe and the rest are not staples at all like Frito pie.
 
2012-03-22 05:35:49 AM

Amnestic: As an Englishman:-

Biscuits and Gravy: Not weird, just not had it. Looks like dumplings and some sort of stew-like sauce, which isn't weird at all.

Red Velvet Cake: I'll be honest, I've never heard of this before. Or I don't remember hearing about it. Either way, it doesn't seem terribly strange, just haven't had it before.

Grits: Some sort of porridge? Never had it, not a huge fan of porridge dishes.

Frito Pie: Basically crisps+chilli+cheese? Woulda thought that'd get soggy but hey, not that weird I guess.


Biscuits are roughly equivalent to a scone. The gravy in question is a savory milk gravy (béchamel sauce) made with American breakfast sausage. (Ground fatty cuts of pork with a sage based seasoning)

Red Velvet Cake is a chocolate cake with a cream cheese frosting. In the past, coco powder would react with the acid in buttermilk and give the cake a red color. When you use coco powder processed with modern methods this no longer happens, but people have taken to adding red food coloring to retain the color for no good reason.

Grits are a corn porridge. (roughly equivalent to a coarsely ground polenta)

Frito Pie: These are made with corn crisps and not potato crisps. They are eaten immediately after you combine the ingredients so they don't have much time to get soggy.
 
2012-03-22 05:44:18 AM
Yea the bread thing is pretty funny actually. Most bread is pretty god awful in America.
 
2012-03-22 06:07:26 AM

Rapmaster2000: TyrantII:

How about good old boiled peanuts?

Being from New England, it was new to me on my trips south. Still haven't tried it, but wet, soggy, warm peanuts isn't something I think I'd care for. Peanuts are crunchy snacks to me, not peas.

I've lived in the South for 12 years and I still haven't acquired a taste for them. They have the texture of wet newspapers. I ate some a few weeks ago at a brewpub that yuppified them with garlic and whatnot and even though the taste was improved the texture still sucked.


If they're overcooked, then yeah. The peanuts should be slightly al dente and boiled in slightly salted water.
 
2012-03-22 06:12:29 AM
In Germany corn is fed to pigs. If you want make a German cry just offer them corn on the cob.
 
2012-03-22 06:12:30 AM

FourBlackBars: Something that only American's drink?

[upload.wikimedia.org image 640x742]

This is the thing that is missing from the list because we are about the only guys who drink it. If you think about the taste, its quite medicinal and syrupy at the same time. Either you were born on it or you realize it tastes like a patent medicine.

Something else we do that no one else in the WORLD can match is eat sugar.

I had a girlfriend who was from Japan and when she came to Arizona to visit, I saw her pause in front of the baked good case at my local coffee shop. When i asked her what she was seeing, she said,

"Its so American."
"How so?"
"Everything is covered in sugar."

And I looked in the case and saw how all the somewhat austere coffee house scones and muffins were indeed completely candy coated. We eat our cake with candy on top and sometimes with a side of whip.

This love of sugar is also missing from the list.



When i was stationed in Japan , my Japanese girlfriend (now my wife of 10 years) was visiting on the A.F.B...She saw root beer in the store and asked about it. So I bought her one . When she opened it outside and took a drink , she spit it out and said it was medicine.
 
2012-03-22 06:13:45 AM

TimGJ: My favourite food combination is served in Brussels. There rather than garnishing their Donner Kebabs (very fatty, highly seasoned ground meat of extremely doubtful provenance sort of grilled and served in flat-bread) with salad they wrap them with frites (French/freedom fries) and mayonnnaise. Artery clogging goodness which can only ever be eaten drunk.

But I suppose they pioneered mayonnaise served with frites in the first place and produce wonderful beer which is made from fruit. I might just retire there.


Sprouts!
img685.imageshack.us
 
2012-03-22 06:19:16 AM

andrewmoriarty: The only place that offers free refills in Australia is Hungry Jack's. It's kind of a marketing Gimmick in Australia.


It started that way in the US.
 
2012-03-22 06:20:23 AM
Biscuits and gravy weird? Git my gun, Ma ... Ima gonna give that varmit a 10 second lead.

/'Merican
//Southern 'Merican
///Loves me some grits, too.
 
2012-03-22 06:23:08 AM
I was at the Asian-ish market in my town and they have black skinned chicken. I'm sure it tastes the same as the pink kind but the thought is kind of odd. I might buy one. This market sells food from all over the world. It's the only place in my area I can find Choco pie. Yum. I make my own pho noodles with my homemade chicken broth.
 
2012-03-22 06:55:09 AM

Cyno01:
Thinking about it, there really isnt a strong regional culinary identity in the north... sure there are specific regional dishes, cinci chili, chicago style "pizza", but nothing like what we consider "southern food".


King of Northern Cuisine:

Link (new window)
 
2012-03-22 06:56:54 AM

Bathia_Mapes: GGracie: Benevolent Misanthrope: GGracie: TheOmni: I dip my fries in mayonnaise. It's awesome.

I dip my fries in Ranch dressing. It's awesomer :-)

I dip my fries in 1,000 Island dressing. It's beyond farking awesome.

I'll have to try that. Thanks :-)

Try dipping your fries in tartar sauce. Very tasty.


I dip mine in mustard.
 
2012-03-22 07:12:25 AM
I think that German broad just didn't like us.
 
2012-03-22 07:14:35 AM

GGracie: TheOmni: I dip my fries in mayonnaise. It's awesome.

I dip my fries in Ranch dressing. It's awesomer :-)


I dip my fries in a chocolate shake. That is the most awesomest. =D

/Dick's fries and a chocolate shake are sublime
//A&W fries and chocolate shake is manna
 
2012-03-22 07:17:54 AM

Forecaster18: You goddamned motherfarkers keep your foreign bastard hands off my biscuits and gravy.

Yes. Here we stand in solidarity. "Shoot, if you must, this old gray head, But spare our country's gravy and biscuits!"

Nice use of the vernacular, by the way.
 
2012-03-22 07:25:45 AM

Forecaster18: You goddamned motherfarkers keep your foreign bastard hands off my biscuits and gravy.

/sounds fat
//is fat


Don't forget chocolate gravy!
 
2012-03-22 07:26:32 AM

SundaesChild: <b><a target="_blank" href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7007601/75723912">Bathia_Mapes</a>: </b> <i>GGracie: Benevolent Misanthrope: GGracie: TheOmni: I dip my fries in mayonnaise. It's awesome.

I dip my fries in Ranch dressing. It's awesomer :-)

I dip my fries in 1,000 Island dressing. It's beyond farking awesome.

I'll have to try that. Thanks :-)

Try dipping your fries in tartar sauce. Very tasty.</i>

I dip mine in mustard.


I put ketchup on my mac and cheese and I dip all Mexican food in ranch or creamy french dressing!

taquitos + creamy french dressing + 30 seconds in microwave = taste bud orgy

What is really good is those cheap frozen bean and cheese burritos overcooked in the microwave. Cook 1 frozen burrito for 5 mins or until it is almost solid as a rock then smother it in Ranch dressing and enjoy. :))
 
2012-03-22 07:30:26 AM

MrBallou: Forecaster18: You goddamned motherfarkers keep your foreign bastard hands off my biscuits and gravy.

Yes. Here we stand in solidarity. "Shoot, if you must, this old gray head, But spare our country's gravy and biscuits!"

Nice use of the vernacular, by the way.


In the casinos here in Las Vegas, it is traditional to serve biscuits and gravy for breakfast in every employee cafeteria. After the MGM Grand first opened, then Chairman Robert Maxey fired the morning shift chef for not putting any out.
 
2012-03-22 07:33:12 AM
"I still can't stomach the sight, taste, or thought of Frito pie."
-- Dragana, Serbia via South Africa

-- Any sensible human being. The earth.

WTF is that monstrosity?
 
2012-03-22 07:36:30 AM

Harry_Seldon: I_Am_Weasel: Though, as a foreigner, I still don't understand how you can get away with calling "American Cheese" a cheese. "American Cheez" I can understand, but a cheese it isn't.

You are buying the wrong stuff. This is a little pricey, but is the very apex of American Cheese.

[hannaford.gsnrecipes.com image 300x300]


I still believe it to be wrong.

Perhaps it's cheese snobbery or chobbery.
 
2012-03-22 07:37:02 AM
I'm an American, and I agree with nearly all of 'em - except Doug and his weird aversion to large portions??
 
2012-03-22 07:37:53 AM
The guy talking about the portion sizes has a point. I never did understand why NY-style delis put a whole freakin' pound of meat on a sandwich. I'd rather not have to dislocate my jaw to take a bite.
 
2012-03-22 07:39:41 AM
Well now I'm just hungry, assholes. It's been a while since I've had a good, fatty, greasy bacon egg and cheese McMuffin. Gimme.
 
2012-03-22 07:42:27 AM

Sgygus: Marcus Aurelius: NO SCRAPPLE!

Just say NO NO NO to scrapple.

/as if anyone needs such advice


Jane, you ignorant slut.
 
2012-03-22 07:50:07 AM
Coming from the midwest, I've never gotten used to grits. Only once or twice in all the times I've tried them have I ever found them even slightly tasty.
 
2012-03-22 07:51:47 AM

Gecko Gingrich: eraser8: FTFA: foreign treats such as fugu (a.k.a. poisonous pufferfish liver...)

Fugu is the whole fish, not just the liver...although the liver is one of the more deadly parts of the animal.

Yeah, I as going to say, the liver (and most everything else besides the flesh), *will* kill you.


Oh, you can eat the liver, in small quantities. The ryokan cut me off after three. shiat, it's delicious.
 
2012-03-22 07:52:50 AM

Badafuco: Ed Finnerty: FTFA: "I always (and still think) cheese is weird." -- Miya, China

I would love to show her canned cheese and watch her freak the fark out.

Someone should invent a Chinese dish that uses cheese.


I had to google Crab Rangoon as I thought it was a chinese dish, turns out it was invented at Trader Vic's in the 1950s. The things you learn.
 
2012-03-22 07:52:58 AM

Forecaster18: You goddamned motherfarkers keep your foreign bastard hands off my biscuits and gravy.

/sounds fat
//is fat


As a fat American, I concur.

Also as a fat American, I feel qualified to run through this list to make fat American comments

2) Peanut Butter? What's wrong with it? Personally I prefer Teddy brand which is nothing more than peanuts mashed into a bloody pulp. Most other brands have other oils and are more processed.

3) Bacon and Eggs. I don't see anything wrong with it from a breakfast perspective, but personally I'm not a huge bacon fan. Give me ham or sausage (patties, not links) and eggs instead.

4) Pasta and Broccoli. Good if the white sauce isn't too heavy.

5) Black pepper. Well, it's better than curry. We have some Indians at work and when they bring their food and start eating it during lunch, the whole place smells like curry by the time they're done. I don't understand how anyone can tolerate even a little bit of the crap.

6) Three warm meals a day. Foreigners, if you don't like it, put your food into the freezer and eat it cold.

7) Soft bread. As opposed to the hard bread that you have to eat like beef jerky to get a piece off of? I'm not a huge bread fan anyway, but I'd take soft bread over hard any day.

8) Red velvet cake. It's tasty, but the one time I had it my shiat was red for two days, and I haven't been able to get over that to have it again.

9) Mayo. I completely agree on this one. Mayo is nasty. Give me Miracle Whip instead. Just not on fries. If you have to put anything on fries at all, then it's not worth eating.

10) Grits. Whoever made these should be tarred and feathered for all of eternity.

11) Huge portion sizes. My god that picture looks good. I'll take 3 please.

12) Salad Dressing. You expect me to eat a salad raw? No thanks. Low fat/fat free blue cheese or ranch dressing should be banned.

13) Frito pie. Never heard of it. Looks like a redneck nacho. Probably is good but I wouldn't make it at home.

14) Cheese. American cheese has no place in life except for breakfast sandwiches (still prefer cheddar in these though) and burgers. Asian cultures don't use cheese, but I'd be crying in the corner without access to some good cheese.

15) Free refills. You only get these in fountain drinks, which pretty much taste like water anyway. Stop whining.
 
2012-03-22 07:57:23 AM
Why don't they understand it?

Because of the metric system?
 
2012-03-22 08:07:03 AM
How are "three warm meals a day", "free drink refills", and "generous portion sizes" considered types of "food"?

/Internet "journalism" fails again.
 
2012-03-22 08:07:11 AM

sonorangal: I'm sure it tastes the same as the pink kind but the thought is kind of odd


It is a little gamey and makes a good broth as a base for soup.
 
2012-03-22 08:10:11 AM
You are all wrong. Fries should be dipped either in Buffalo wing sauce or sprinkled with Frank's Red Hot. A 50/50 mix of Sriracha and ketchup is also acceptable.
 
2012-03-22 08:14:56 AM
As a (temporary, don't worry.. lol) immigrant from the british isles to yankytown, the thing that makes me cringe the most in your food here is when for breakfast, you put those buttered sweet pancakes, syrup and sometimes even cream, on the same plate as what you call sausages, and bacon.
And half the time the 'sausages' and 'bacon' are sugary-sweet flavoured themselves. It's really quite disgusting, and might explain all the fatties. I mean a full english isn't exactly healthy (scrambled eggs, fried bread, mushrooms, tomatoes, black pud', wiltshire bacon, cumberland sausage) ~ but then you fellas go dump three days worth of diabeetus-juice on top? Bleaurgh.
 
2012-03-22 08:16:15 AM
That is an embarrassingly stupid article.

And the British guy saying he's surprised at portion sizes: Britain is every bit as fat as America is. So is Germany, and Australia, and several others now. America may have started the trend, but we're not gonna end it, by god.

Link (new window)

Link (new window)

"The German obesity rate is considered at the same level as with the American obesity rate."

As it's already been stated, dipping fries in mayo is more popular in France, and the Chinese eat cheese too.
 
2012-03-22 08:21:56 AM

ThrnPhl: Guess I'll have to keep an eye out the next time I'm in redneck country. I guess I could go to 711 and get the necessary ingredients when I'm shiatfaced.


Just go to your local super market, get a small bag of fritos, get a can of NO BEANS(its always in caps for some reason) Hormel Chili, get some sliced or grated cheese, get some onions, and go make it at home. It's easy, it's cheap. You can make it entirely in the microwave, but I prefer to heat up the chili on the oven, then let the cheese melt on top of it. It isn't something I eat regularly -once or twice a year is good enough for me on this dish, though I don't think I've had one in about 5 years at this point- but it's tasty.
 
2012-03-22 08:23:52 AM

d_the_sandman: Most places outside of America I've been there always seems to be some variation of yogurt, but usually not what we would call ice cream.


Ive had haagen dazs in the forbidden city. (little strip mall just outside)
Belgian fries in Rotterdam with a (really really horrible) MY pizza

Ive been in North America for 7 years and I still cannot find a decent meat pie.
 
2012-03-22 08:24:15 AM

topcon: That is an embarrassingly stupid article.

And the British guy saying he's surprised at portion sizes: Britain is every bit as fat as America is. So is Germany, and Australia, and several others now. America may have started the trend, but we're not gonna end it, by god.

Link (new window)

Link (new window)

"The German obesity rate is considered at the same level as with the American obesity rate."

As it's already been stated, dipping fries in mayo is more popular in France, and the Chinese eat cheese too.


I believe I've heard that there are now more obese than starving people in the world. Looking at the average American or European, I can believe it.
 
2012-03-22 08:24:17 AM
Something I thought was gross till I tried it. I'll just leave this here, and reccomend anytime yinz are in picksburgh yinz gah ta Primanti's

www.womansday.com
 
2012-03-22 08:28:50 AM
"Mayonnaise! People put that on everything, some even dip their french fries on it!! Yuck!!" -- Pat, Mexico

STFU, Pat from Mexico. Mexicans love it so much that it's more apt to be on their corn than butter is. Don't give me that "Ew, I don't understand American's and their mayonnaise!" crap.
 
2012-03-22 08:31:27 AM

fatkidinabeenie: Something I thought was gross till I tried it. I'll just leave this here, and reccomend anytime yinz are in picksburgh yinz gah ta Primanti's


Onions, fries/hash browns and roast beef ?
 
2012-03-22 08:34:38 AM

pkellmey: Coming from the midwest, I've never gotten used to grits. Only once or twice in all the times I've tried them have I ever found them even slightly tasty.


Grits, like polenta, are pretty flavorless all by themselves. The flavor comes from what you add to them.

Crumbled freshly cooked bacon and pepper jack cheese, for instance, turn bland grits into teh concentrated yummy.
 
2012-03-22 08:39:44 AM
Red velvet cake done the proper way contains zero food coloring. Cocoa mixed w/ an acidic agent (usually butter milk and vinegar) creates the red tint. For a more intense red color you can add some beet juice. The vinegar is primarily added to the baking soda to get the gases going. Otherwise the soda can turn the cake blueish.
 
2012-03-22 08:44:18 AM

TheXerox: Born, raised, and still live in Iowa, LOVE grits since being introduced to them as a little kid by my dad who spent some of his childhood in Florida before moving back to the Midwest. I only know one other guy here who eats grits and he's a Southern transplant, everybody else here is revolted by it and wonders how the hell I acquired a taste for them in the first place.


I bein originally from the south, myself....I ALWAYS get weird ass looks when I go to a diner and ask if they have grits (if not, I bring my own for them to cook)....cause grits 'n eggs are SO farkin tasty!

/same w the biscuits n gravy
//could eat those everyday!
 
2012-03-22 09:05:36 AM

Do You Know What I Am Saying: There is not nearly enough outrage in this thread defending red velvet cake.


because red velvet cake is the only thing on the list that is totally disgusting. Years ago, when it was the cocoa processing that made it red, it was wonderful. The crap you get now makes you poop what looks like blood, and tastes like floor cleaner.
 
2012-03-22 09:05:50 AM

ciberido: d_the_sandman: I'd say it depends on your definition. Most places outside of America I've been there always seems to be some variation of yogurt, but usually not what we would call ice cream.

I defy you to name one country on this Earth that does not have ice cream.


Ethiopia
 
2012-03-22 09:07:50 AM

Marcus Aurelius: No scrapple?

NO SCRAPPLE!


Scapple is old world cuisine. Same with punhaus or pon haus. I "think" it's PA Dutch, my parents and grandparents love the stuff. I can't stand it.
 
2012-03-22 09:16:42 AM

lohphat: Rapmaster2000: TyrantII:

How about good old boiled peanuts?

Being from New England, it was new to me on my trips south. Still haven't tried it, but wet, soggy, warm peanuts isn't something I think I'd care for. Peanuts are crunchy snacks to me, not peas.

I've lived in the South for 12 years and I still haven't acquired a taste for them. They have the texture of wet newspapers. I ate some a few weeks ago at a brewpub that yuppified them with garlic and whatnot and even though the taste was improved the texture still sucked.

If they're overcooked, then yeah. The peanuts should be slightly al dente and boiled in slightly salted water.


They remind me of edamame.
 
2012-03-22 09:20:47 AM
HA HA HA! FOREIGN PEOPLE ARE WEIRD AND STUPID!

files.myopera.com
 
2012-03-22 09:21:35 AM
A lot of fatties in this thread
 
2012-03-22 09:35:53 AM

Amnestic: As an Englishman:-

Biscuits and Gravy: Not weird, just not had it. Looks like dumplings and some sort of stew-like sauce, which isn't weird at all.

Peanut Butter: Not weird, don't like the taste. My roommate consumes the stuff and loves it.

Bacon and Eggs: Part of a proper breakfast.

Pasta and Brocolli: Had that last night when I realised I had very little food in the flat.

Black Pepper: Not weird. Put it on a great deal of dishes.

Three Warm Meals: THIS IS NOT A FOOD. THIS IS A FOOD HABIT. Also, not weird.

Soft Bread: Staple food product. Also the quote they have is from a German and I'm fairly certain Germans have soft bread quite commonly.

Red Velvet Cake: I'll be honest, I've never heard of this before. Or I don't remember hearing about it. Either way, it doesn't seem terribly strange, just haven't had it before.

Mayo: Sandwiches, tuna, occasionally chips (that's British chips, not American chips)...yeah, I eat mayo.

Grits: Some sort of porridge? Never had it, not a huge fan of porridge dishes.

Huge Portion Sizes: THIS IS NOT A FOOD. THIS IS A FOOD HABIT. Also, a little weird to have constantly but whatever floats your boat I guess.

Salad Dressing: Not weird. Eat my salad with dressing.

Frito Pie: Basically crisps+chilli+cheese? Woulda thought that'd get soggy but hey, not that weird I guess.

Cheese: Are you farking serious?

Free Refills: THIS IS NOT A FOOD. THIS IS A SERVING OPTION.


Agreed
 
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