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(ESPN) NewsFlash God to replace Jesus in Denver   (espn.go.com) divider line 860
    More: NewsFlash, Peyton Manning, Broncos, Skip Bayless, Tom Condon, Johnny Unitas, Jeff Saturday, Joe Namath, Chris Mortensen  
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25576 clicks; posted to Sports » on 19 Mar 2012 at 12:31 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»


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2012-03-19 01:27:19 PM
Smith to Miami.
Tebow to Jax.
49ers sign Jake Delhomme.
 
2012-03-19 01:27:25 PM
LegacyDL: SilentStrider: Well, got this one right anyway.

And if Tebow is Jesus, Manning is God... Does that make Elway The Holy Ghost in this situation?

I think Elway is playing the role of "The Jews" in this situation.


cdn.styleforum.net
 
2012-03-19 01:27:31 PM
Contrabulous Flabtraption: Who's this Tebow kid? Have we had any threads about him on Fark?

not this weekend
 
2012-03-19 01:27:48 PM
KingPsyz: Trade Tebow to the Bears...

He'll either rise to occasion or be cruicified with the weakest QB protection in the NFL, and I say that as a Bears fan.


I may not be a T-bow fan, but I don't want to see him dead. That's just cruel.

Also Bears fan.
 
2012-03-19 01:28:57 PM
umad: Brady went out and won his rings with a bunch of nobodies.

While wearing women's boots.
 
2012-03-19 01:29:02 PM
I has a sad. Wanted him back home in TN so very badly.
 
2012-03-19 01:29:12 PM
trenchael: Fargobah: Hey, it makes sense, he goes from playing for a team whose mascot is a horse to a team who is run by Horse Face

[i306.photobucket.com image 160x120]

and whose mascot is also a horse...


A horse is a horse, of course, of course,
And no one can talk to a horse of course
That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mr. Elway I mean Ed,
 
2012-03-19 01:29:38 PM
Dinobot: Where is Captain Steroid?

img10.imageshack.us

I'm p*ssed! I'm f**king p*ssed! >:O

Tebow's young, healthy, continues to improve, healthy, has tons of potential bubbling beneath the surface... Oh, did I mention he's HEALTHY?

Peyton, on the other hand, had a BROKEN FREAKIN' NECK! Coming back from an injury like that is difficult enough, but in DENVER? In THAT altitude?! In his shape, he'll be lucky to finish the season!

I can't f**king believe the Broncos would do this! Now, they'll probably ship Tebow to Miami or Jacksonville, and he'll win a Super Bowl there!

Bringing in Peyton Manning to replace Tebow is short-sighted, insane, and stupidstupidstupidstupidSTUPID!

I... I'm going to go cry, now...

img694.imageshack.us
 
2012-03-19 01:29:44 PM
Klippoklondike: I hope so. Think how good Tebow could be if he could throw accurately and read a defense like Manning? Add that to his running skills and he would be as good as his fans think he is. He would be making a huge mistake if he tries to get traded. I really hope he stays and focuses on learning as much as he can from Manning.

Holy shiat, YES. Plus if he had the speed of Chris Johnson, the poise of Tom Brady, the durability of Brett Favre, the accuracy of Brees, and the arm of Dan Marino then Tim Tebow would be so awesome...
 
2012-03-19 01:30:02 PM
Sigh. One more go-round before all of my Tebow/Bronco pictures are obsolete.

i.imgur.com

RIP, little buddy. You were one of my favorite pixel collections....
 
2012-03-19 01:30:02 PM
roflmaonow: Ah completely forgot about him. I'm still stuck with the mindset that Sproles and LT are their RBs.

Matthews was their first round pick a few years ago. He's LT-esque, and very good. They also just signed a big bruiser fullback, Le'Ron McClain, and they might look into another RB now that Tolbert is gone. There are still some out there in FA.

As to this news, as a San Diego fan, I think this is great news. Rivers-Manning games are always exciting, and hearing the lamentation of the Tebowists will be glorious.
 
2012-03-19 01:30:24 PM
Yanks_RSJ: Grand_Moff_Joseph: The question now is: What team wants to put up with Tebow's bible thumping press avails and his bandwagon of "fans"?

The Jaguars would kill to have a few paying customers


Didn't the Jags already sign Henne to go along with Gabbert? I mean, I suppose that doesn't necessarily preclude a trade, but it seems like that's what they're going to go with. More likely that Miami tries to lowball Denver into giving him to them.
 
2012-03-19 01:30:29 PM
Yanks_RSJ: Grand_Moff_Joseph: The question now is: What team wants to put up with Tebow's bible thumping press avails and his bandwagon of "fans"?

The Jaguars would kill to have a few paying customers.


--------------------
The unrealistic Tebow will sell a lot of seats in Jacksonville (for a few years). Then he will once again whine due to reality. I wonder why.
 
2012-03-19 01:30:41 PM
So will the Courageous Quinn finally be Manning's pupil of the future?
 
2012-03-19 01:31:10 PM
Nick Nostril: Damaged goods.

/but we shall see


This could end really really badly.

/I think Manning should have hung it up and started coaching or speechifying or something.
 
2012-03-19 01:31:13 PM
mentallo69: Religious Antics aside....Tebow is a really good guy, down to earth individual and to wish him bad things is not cool.

Seahawks fan,


Yep. I was pretty vocal about Tebow on Fark last season but I made sure to hate on the play, not the person. I hope he has a long career wherever he lands.
 
2012-03-19 01:31:32 PM
redmid17 : Denver's offensive line is pretty bad, especially for Manning's style of play. They need to get much better in pass pro, but the run blocking out of a traditional offensive set isn't very good either. Tebow was their best runner by YPC and without the possibility of him running the ball, the defenders know they can tee off on the running back. Obviously play action is going to offset that to a certain extent, but PFF and FO are both pretty down on the broncos running game. Broncos just need to sign a few targets, get the Saturday-Manning connection back, and be able to replace Brian Dawkins.

Payton Manning has the quickest release in all football, he automatically makes his offensive line look better because of it. With basically the same line in 2011 the Colts took 35 sacks, more than double of the 16 they took in 2010. And Painter and Orlovsky were a lot more mobile than Manning. Plus Manning reads the defenses so well that the running game will not lose a whole lot from Tebow's option based attack.

Not to mention that he is going to draw quality wideout free agents to Denver like frat boys to the bar during bikini night.
 
2012-03-19 01:31:49 PM
davemelnick: Then he will once again whine due to reality.

At what point has he whined?

FFS, people, get over your idiotic, baseless hate.
 
2012-03-19 01:31:52 PM
Well, at least he didn't sign with the Cardinals.
 
2012-03-19 01:32:20 PM
Balchinian: Step One: Hire good QB with questionable physical ability to play at all, let alone make it through an entire season
Step Two: Sell off healthy QB with a decent showing for a young kid
Step Three: Look like a dumbass when the 3rd snap of the year is the good QB's neck.
Step Four: Profit???

This is one of the biggest bone-headed move ever, and it will set the Broncs back 10 years. Don't believe me? Two words: Detroit Lions



In the free agency world, there is no such thing as being set back 10 years. The Raiders went from laughing stock to contender (and probably back to laughing stock again) over the course of 3 years. If you're saying look at the Lions as proof, keep in mind that Matt Millen was canned in 2007. By 2011, the Lions were a playoff team.

If Manning is done, then Denver has three or so crappy years, which is probably no different than they would have had with a QB that has a 47% completion rating and who feels like holding the ball for 30 seconds is a good idea.
 
2012-03-19 01:32:42 PM
Eagles need a quarterback. Could you imagine Tebow in Philly? Honestly, that would be kind of awesome in a potassium chlorate meets gummy bear type of way.
 
2012-03-19 01:32:47 PM
SilentStrider: Well, got this one right anyway.

And if Tebow is Jesus, Manning is God... Does that make Elway The Holy Ghost in this situation?




i3.photobucket.com

If Otto Graham and Johnny Unitas are the Cain and Abel of football, Joe Montana is Zachariah, John Elway is Methuselah, and, of course, Peyton Manning is the wise prophet Ezekiel, then what does that make Tim Tebow?
 
2012-03-19 01:32:48 PM
I don't know why Manning chose Denver. It seems counter to what he should do, since their offense is based on the option.
 
2012-03-19 01:32:53 PM
CavalierEternal: Relevant butthurt:

No. I get this shiat in my inbox. That's what Newsflash does, and I don't think guys playing with balls is particularly newsworthy.

And in response to your childish taunt:

"WAHHH! I MUST DEFEND SPORTS BECAUSE THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE INTERESTING OR INTELLIGENT ABOUT ME AND IT DEFINES ME AS A MAN! WAAAHHH!"

Oh, and for your information, my teenage boxing record was 18-3-1. I was undefeated on the fencing team in college. And I kicked ass at little league playing third base until I got in a fight and took a crowbar to the back, so fark you.

I could probably still kick your ass in Olympic-style fencing, which is a hell of lot more of a man's sport than a bunch of overpaid pussies playing with a basketball.


I used to be an athleate like you, but then I took an arrow in the knee.

/Another e-mail for you.
 
2012-03-19 01:32:56 PM
Time Traveling Bunnies: So will the Courageous Quinn finally be Manning's pupil of the future?

No, he's in Kansas City.
 
2012-03-19 01:33:24 PM
LegacyDL: Mark my words: Tim Tebow will become the next Tom Brady.

Not that I'm saying Manning is going to get Drew Bledsoe'ed, but I'm expecting Manning to get his Obi Wan Kenobi on and instill some skills into Tebow so that in 3-5 years time Tebow will actually succeed.


Tebow is getting traded or cut, Elway was never interested in the guy in the first place

besides Manning has zero track record of mentoring anybody... nobody has learned how to play QB under the guy

i think either Jacksonville or New England will take him, the former he's starting QB day 1, the latter he will probably be used in a multitude of roles while still being able to retain a role as backup QB
 
2012-03-19 01:33:38 PM
IAmRight: the_innkeeper: I will take Manning and his issues over Tebow and his issues any day. Regardless of how he plays in vs out, he is a better quarterback.

That's fine. But your ceiling with Manning is exactly what you got last year with Tebow. I just laugh when people think this makes the Broncos contenders. They're still going to have a struggle just to win their division.


Broncos ceiling is much higher with Manning that with Tebow. That's so laughable a debate most wouldn't even entertain it.
 
2012-03-19 01:33:43 PM
I wonder if it will be Tamba Hali or Eric Berry to knock Peyton out for the season.
 
2012-03-19 01:33:52 PM
Captain Steroid: Dinobot: Where is Captain Steroid?

I'm p*ssed! I'm f**king p*ssed! >:O

Hello my friend, how is your spring so far?
anyways:
I have mixed feeling about this, so I'm happy for our defense, we do need some backs though
remember, Elway played and peak at a later age than PAYaTon, who had a year off, and wants a QB like him.
and we still have Von Miller and a solid front defensive line.
 
2012-03-19 01:34:18 PM
Bomb Head Mohammed: Eagles need a quarterback. Could you imagine Tebow in Philly? Honestly, that would be kind of awesome in a potassium chlorate meets gummy bear type of way.

Maybe he'd get DeSean Jackson to STFU and just play well.
 
2012-03-19 01:34:37 PM
Best part. Forever.
 
2012-03-19 01:35:09 PM
Deadhouseplants: Morgan Freeman George Burns is replacing Tim Tebow???


FTFY

Yes, I sound old.
 
2012-03-19 01:35:19 PM
hbk72777: So let's see the fallout here

Tim Tebow- didn't pray hard enough or God didn't really like him. Either way he'll be traded and has his ego crushed

Mark Sanchez- has his feelings hurt by the Jets inquiring about Manning, get's a nice extension, but still has a bruised ego

Alex Smith- Insulted that the 9er's would be willing to dump him for Manning, so he signs with the Dolphins

Redskins get rebuffed by Manning, go overkill on a trade to get a QB

Dolphins don't get Manning, the get beaten by the Seahawks on Flynn, so overpay for an average QB Smith just to say they got a new QB


Manning has left a wake of destruction, but boy are the commentators going to love the storyline this year. They'll have on in just about every city he plays in this year


Buffalo - unaffected
 
2012-03-19 01:35:30 PM
jj325: SoCalSurfer: Woo!! Get to watch rivers beat him twice a year now!

LOL. This just means the AFC West is a 2 team conference now. Raiders and Broncos


Hmmm...The Raiders finished third in the division last year, have released 6 or more starters because of overvalued contracts, have made no moves in FA to replace them, and have NO draft picks, NONE, until the 5th round (!) this year...yep, they'll be serious contenders, all right! Sounds like you should book your fight to New Orleans now, before the rush...I can probably get you a deal with a small upfront deposit (CC number required).
 
2012-03-19 01:35:31 PM
Ya'll need to chill. All things work together for good, right?
 
2012-03-19 01:36:01 PM
Denver....also known as "Not San Francisco".

WOOOOOOOOOOOO!
 
2012-03-19 01:36:37 PM
Where's Favre? Shouldn't he jump into the mix again?



/Tebow to Chicago
//would be amusing
 
2012-03-19 01:37:03 PM
Captain Steroid: Bringing in Peyton Manning to replace Tebow is short-sighted, insane, and stupidstupidstupidstupidSTUPID!

I... I'm going to go cry, now...



I'm sorry, buddy. :(
 
2012-03-19 01:37:15 PM
schpanky: hbk72777: So let's see the fallout here

Tim Tebow- didn't pray hard enough or God didn't really like him. Either way he'll be traded and has his ego crushed

Mark Sanchez- has his feelings hurt by the Jets inquiring about Manning, get's a nice extension, but still has a bruised ego

Alex Smith- Insulted that the 9er's would be willing to dump him for Manning, so he signs with the Dolphins

Redskins get rebuffed by Manning, go overkill on a trade to get a QB

Dolphins don't get Manning, the get beaten by the Seahawks on Flynn, so overpay for an average QB Smith just to say they got a new QB


Manning has left a wake of destruction, but boy are the commentators going to love the storyline this year. They'll have on in just about every city he plays in this year

Buffalo - unaffected


Cleveland - still a Factory of Sadness
 
2012-03-19 01:37:17 PM
redmid17: Broncos ceiling is much higher with Manning that with Tebow.

Well, since they're not going to make it to the Super Bowl and they're probably not going to make the AFCCG, they're probably going to be worse than last year.
 
2012-03-19 01:37:19 PM
No. I get this shiat in my inbox. That's what Newsflash does, and I don't think guys playing with balls is particularly newsworthy.

And in response to your childish taunt:

"WAHHH! I MUST DEFEND SPORTS BECAUSE THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE INTERESTING OR INTELLIGENT ABOUT ME AND IT DEFINES ME AS A MAN! WAAAHHH!"

Oh, and for your information, my teenage boxing record was 18-3-1. I was undefeated on the fencing team in college. And I kicked ass at little league playing third base until I got in a fight and took a crowbar to the back, so fark you.

I could probably still kick your ass in Olympic-style fencing, which is a hell of lot more of a man's sport than a bunch of overpaid pussies playing with a basketball.


Sports is entertainment, and provides a much needed respite for some people. Also, the NFL is a multi-billion dollar industry, so this is big news for anyone with even a modest investment in the league. Even Vegas suspended bets on the next SB until it was determined where Peyton would end up. It's obvious to see that this is news flash worthy.

On another note. You seem to have a lot of pent up anger and aggression surrounding sports. Would you like to talk about it?
 
2012-03-19 01:37:25 PM
CavalierEternal: If Otto Graham and Johnny Unitas are the Cain and Abel of football, Joe Montana is Zachariah, John Elway is Methuselah, and, of course, Peyton Manning is the wise prophet Ezekiel, then what does that make Tim Tebow?


Noah's son Ham.
 
2012-03-19 01:37:30 PM
Ok, but was this really worth two Fark News Flash alerts in my inbox?
 
2012-03-19 01:37:38 PM
I love reading all the bronco "fans" being butthurt. Keep posting the quotes please.
 
2012-03-19 01:38:20 PM
Captain Steroid: Dinobot: Where is Captain Steroid?

[img10.imageshack.us image 610x345]

I'm p*ssed! I'm f**king p*ssed! >:O

Tebow's young, healthy, continues to improve, healthy, has tons of potential bubbling beneath the surface... Oh, did I mention he's HEALTHY?

Peyton, on the other hand, had a BROKEN FREAKIN' NECK! Coming back from an injury like that is difficult enough, but in DENVER? In THAT altitude?! In his shape, he'll be lucky to finish the season!

I can't f**king believe the Broncos would do this! Now, they'll probably ship Tebow to Miami or Jacksonville, and he'll win a Super Bowl there!

Bringing in Peyton Manning to replace Tebow is short-sighted, insane, and stupidstupidstupidstupidSTUPID!

I... I'm going to go cry, now...

[img694.imageshack.us image 320x175]


Tebow got lucky. Very lucky. Notice how the Pats, with an ehh D, completely murdered him? That wasn't a coincidence. Tebow isn't very good. He was ranked 34th in pass percentage in a league with 32 teams.

Manning, on the other hand, is ONE OF THE BEST QB's EVER.

EVER.

He will most likely be rusty, but still will make good decisions and throw well. You will be better off with him..

BTW - Thanks for Brandon Lloyd. I bet Manning would like to have a deep threat like him. =)
 
2012-03-19 01:38:33 PM
IAmRight: davemelnick: Then he will once again whine due to reality.

At what point has he whined?

FFS, people, get over your idiotic, baseless hate.


Yeah, this. I don't ever remember him whining. People expected him to whine and all he did was have a surprisingly good attitude. I think he's great.
 
2012-03-19 01:39:10 PM
expobill: Captain Steroid: Dinobot: Where is Captain Steroid?

I'm p*ssed! I'm f**king p*ssed! >:O
Hello my friend, how is your spring so far?
anyways:
I have mixed feeling about this, so I'm happy for our defense, we do need some backs though
remember, Elway played and peak at a later age than PAYaTon, who had a year off, and wants a QB like him.
and we still have Von Miller and a solid front defensive line.


Elway didn't play with a neck held together with chewing gum and duct tape!

This is stupidstupidstupidstupidSTUPID!!!

img803.imageshack.us
 
2012-03-19 01:40:05 PM
varmitydog: redmid17 : Denver's offensive line is pretty bad, especially for Manning's style of play. They need to get much better in pass pro, but the run blocking out of a traditional offensive set isn't very good either. Tebow was their best runner by YPC and without the possibility of him running the ball, the defenders know they can tee off on the running back. Obviously play action is going to offset that to a certain extent, but PFF and FO are both pretty down on the broncos running game. Broncos just need to sign a few targets, get the Saturday-Manning connection back, and be able to replace Brian Dawkins.

Payton Manning has the quickest release in all football, he automatically makes his offensive line look better because of it. With basically the same line in 2011 the Colts took 35 sacks, more than double of the 16 they took in 2010. And Painter and Orlovsky were a lot more mobile than Manning. Plus Manning reads the defenses so well that the running game will not lose a whole lot from Tebow's option based attack.

Not to mention that he is going to draw quality wideout free agents to Denver like frat boys to the bar during bikini night.


I'm well aware of the holes Manning covers on shiatty offensive lines. It still doesn't mean you don't want to improve it to give him extra time in the pocket. Also what quality free agent WRs are left? Just about the only one I can think of is Mike Wallace and he's an RFA (well worth taking imo though). The difference between an option offense and a pro-based offense is pretty big as far as run blocking is concerned.
 
2012-03-19 01:40:09 PM
www.topnews.in

madgonad: I wonder if it will be Tamba Hali or Eric Berry to knock Peyton out for the season.


Oh, she's a knockout, alright
 
2012-03-19 01:40:34 PM
Honest Bender: I thought the whole point of having a Sports tab was so that the rest of us didn't have to see this crap.

Well the politics tab over flows too and we don't need that bullshiat either.

This is dangerous for Denver since god may smite Peyton's neck for cutting his grandson.
 
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