FTFA:
"The photo was snapped by a passenger on an Atlantis all-gay cruise."

I declare the thread over.

I'd hit it...

...with a boat oar!!!

Here all week...

Ed Grubermann: And this is meaningful in what way, exactly?

Dried poop is hard to get off a chaise lounge?

I love how he says "they caught me sunbathing" like it's something sinful and wicked.

IMDWalrus: I'm just thankful that it wasn't Newt.

THIS

Though if the Repubs really want to make sure women never have sex again, a shirtless Newt would work much better than contraception restrictions, ultrasound rape, etc.

Hell, just thinking about it makes my ovaries shrivel up like raisins.

Thread number: 7000069

Makes this story funnier for some reason.

When I'm out walking
I strut my stuff
And I'm so strung out
I'm high as a kite
I just might
Stop to check you out

Let me go on like
Santorum in the sun
Let me go on
Big hands, I know you're the one

Body and beats
I stain my sheets
I don't even know why
My girlfriend
She's at the end
She is starting to cry

Let me go on like
Santorum in the sun
Let me go on
Big hands, I know you're the one

When I'm out walking
I strut my stuff
And I'm so strung out
I'm high as a kite
I just might
Stop to check you out

When I'm out walking
I strut my stuff
And I'm so strung out
I'm high as a kite
I just might
Stop to check you out

Body and beats
I stain my sheets
I don't even know why
My girlfriend
She's at the end
She is starting to cry

When I'm out walking
I strut my stuff
And I'm so strung out
I'm high as a kite
I just might
Stop to check you out

Let me go on like
Santorum in the sun
Let me go on
Big hands, I know you're the one

"Have you ever...seen a grown man naked?"

/much props to the original Farktographer

Lemme go o-onnn,
Like Santorum in the sun.
Lemme go o-onn
Froth man, I know you're the one.

I'm just thankful that it wasn't Newt.

Meh, Mitch Daniels can body press that flabby altar boy.