DreamyAltarBoy: Shouldn't this be over by now?

What would you know about that?

Triumph: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 480x550]

Not really.

I will sing with my nipples.

Say I'm working at NSA. Somebody puts a Last Post on my desk, something nobody else can type. So I take a shot at it and maybe I type it. And I'm real happy with myself because I did my job well. But maybe that Last Post was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and 1,500 people I never had a problem with get killed. Now the politicians are saying, 'Send in the marines to secure the area' because they don't give a shiat. It won't be their kid over there, getting shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number was called because they were pulling a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie taking shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, because he'll work for 15 cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at 250 a gallon. And naturally they're taking their sweet time bringing the oil back and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long until he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the job interviews, which sucks because the shrapnel in his ass is giving him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starving because every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're serving is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what do I think? I'm holding out for something better. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.

Hey pal, wanna be buddies?

Monkey MKIII: jaylectricity: Hey pal, wanna be buddies?

Don't call me pal, buddy.

OK, friend!

Oysterman: [i1.kym-cdn.com image 248x249]

Monkey MKIII: Don't call me friend, pal.

Dude...seriously.

Not to break character but did you watch the Reverse Cowgirl episode last week?

Monkey MKIII: Okay, my character is now broken. Yes, I watched Reverse Cowgirl and I found it funny. I now sit on the toilet facing the other way. Where would I be without South Park?

I don't know, but the first time I ever heard of sitting on the toilet that way was Daniel Tosh's standup routine. He was like, "Yeah, so I can eat a bowl of cereal while I'm taking a dump."

Monkey MKIII: jaylectricity: Monkey MKIII: Okay, my character is now broken. Yes, I watched Reverse Cowgirl and I found it funny. I now sit on the toilet facing the other way. Where would I be without South Park?

I don't know, but the first time I ever heard of sitting on the toilet that way was Daniel Tosh's standup routine. He was like, "Yeah, so I can eat a bowl of cereal while I'm taking a dump."

Carlos Mencia would be proud.

Why, for ripping off Dane Cook?

Yes.

This thread will not end in ellipses.