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(Some PC Gaming Guy)   How television gets gaming and technology wrong. You'll cry, you'll laugh and punch your monitor all at the same time   (truepcgaming.com) divider line 108
    More: Fail, Television Gets Gaming, videos, technobabble, monitors, Prince of Persia, display device, Visual Basic  
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9071 clicks; posted to Geek » on 14 Mar 2012 at 7:36 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-03-14 06:39:11 AM
You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll kiss three bucks goodbye.
 
2012-03-14 07:05:00 AM
Constantly?
 
2012-03-14 07:35:53 AM
Things that bug me about TV, #2966:

How come every video game on TV sounds like the Atari 2600 version of Pac Man?

/Probably made more $$ of that damn sound than they did selling the game.
 
2012-03-14 07:45:09 AM
Two people typing on the same keyboard? That is weapons-grade stupid right there. I bet these people think that two women could have one baby in four and a half months.
 
2012-03-14 07:48:09 AM

Flint Ironstag: Two people typing on the same keyboard? That is weapons-grade stupid right there. I bet these people think that two women could have one baby in four and a half months.


RAD programming for those who are unclear on the concept...
 
2012-03-14 07:57:20 AM
Obligatory.

art.penny-arcade.com
 
2012-03-14 07:58:25 AM
I could only watch the first and last one. The first they can't act for shiat. The last one... man. He needs to get back to firefly.

\Cop shows suck
 
2012-03-14 08:00:25 AM
Almost all of them were CBS shows for baby boomers.
 
2012-03-14 08:01:40 AM

Flint Ironstag: Two people typing on the same keyboard? That is weapons-grade stupid right there. I bet these people think that two women could have one baby in four and a half months.


that was the worst one for me, but i did stop there.

threads like these tell me all i need to know about NCIS
 
2012-03-14 08:09:27 AM
Flint Ironstag
Two people typing on the same keyboard? That is weapons-grade stupid right there.

And the stupid continued when that dude pulled the plug. of their computer.

---

The one thing I would kinda defend is that garbage IP address. One could argue that they were doing the IP version of a 555 telephone number.
 
2012-03-14 08:12:05 AM
I use IRC, am I a hacker?
 
2012-03-14 08:13:39 AM

zato_ichi: Almost all of them were CBS shows for baby boomers.


That's why, dring the 2 Idiots 1 Keyboard debacle, it took a boomer to pull the plug.
 
2012-03-14 08:16:28 AM
Who gives a shiat if they're right or not, somebody find me the picture of JLove dressed up as that avatar.

Yes, I saw that episode.

Sorry, here's my man card.

JLove's still hot!
 
2012-03-14 08:21:15 AM
it saddens me that they get away with this stuff. Their entire thought process is "no one watching will know the difference so who cares". The unfortunate/annoying part is, it'd take all of about 10 minutes worth of work to get it right/not fill your show with wild inaccuracies. This doesn't apply only to tech stuff (although it's usually the most blatant disregard for reality), but military protocol, police protocol, etc.


also:

The Voice of Doom:
The one thing I would kinda defend is that garbage IP address. One could argue that they were doing the IP version of a 555 telephone number.


That's why they do that: I can't remember where, but I do remember an interview with someone once (I do remember the show I was reading about was known for being fairly accurate), they intentionally choose a random series of numbers that couldn't possibly translate to an actual IP on purpose. The few times they use an actual address, it usually belongs to a domain they've registered to promote the site.
 
2012-03-14 08:35:40 AM
I walked in on a Glee line that made me cringe, girl said she was trolling in an internet forum to find information. Lurking and trolling are apparently the same thing to kids/idiots.
 
2012-03-14 08:38:05 AM
Television gets everything wrong. It's what they do.
 
2012-03-14 08:40:56 AM
That was the most elaborate explanation of how IRC works I've ever seen...complete with high-seas CGI. I absolutely HATE when shows/movies use technology stuff wrong like this. I don't mind if they quote technology that's out of date (like watching Golden Eye where she orders a bunch of IBM-compatible computers with 64 meg hard drives, CD-ROM, and 14.4 kbps modems), but when they get it completely wrong like Transformers...I immediately judge the writes/director for not consulting anyone under 30 first.

Also, don't forget about Transformers:
"How do we get the signal out? How do we call the Air Force?
Can you hotwire this computer to transmit a tone through the radio?
What good is that?
Morse code! You can use this to transmit it through that!
Okay, I'll do it! Turn it around. Okay, let's see. Simmons, I need a screwdriver!"
 
2012-03-14 08:41:16 AM

American Decency Association: Flint Ironstag: Two people typing on the same keyboard? That is weapons-grade stupid right there. I bet these people think that two women could have one baby in four and a half months.

that was the worst one for me, but i did stop there.

threads like these tell me all i need to know about NCIS


Shouldn't have stopped. The last one (Castle) they actually got it right.
 
2012-03-14 08:45:50 AM

thecpt: I walked in on a Glee line that made me cringe, girl said she was trolling in an internet forum to find information. Lurking and trolling are apparently the same thing to kids/idiots.


Trolling will get you information. Mainly where to go and what to do with yourself when you get there.
 
2012-03-14 08:47:06 AM

whistlerdash: Their entire thought process is "no one watching will know the difference so who cares".


Alternately, "fark it, it looks good and keeps the plot rolling".

I mean, anyone that's ever been in even a schoolyard fight knows that if you go down after being cracked over the head with a heavy object, you're not getting up without brain damage if you get up at all. But we don't have monthly threads that are collections of video clips of TV knockouts biatching about the lack of concussions and accidental death.

It's theater, man, it's not supposed to be a literal display of what is ostensibly going on.

//Personally, my favorite variant of this silliness is movie chemistry and explosions.
 
2012-03-14 08:50:33 AM
My favorite is the prince of persia one. First of all it is the longest video game montage ever. second when the leader cop guy sees the woman cop mimicking playing the game, then leads her into the room like she's the farking chosen one I almost cried.
 
2012-03-14 08:52:52 AM
Why do they do these things? Because the actual reality would make for a boring show.

Lets take NCIS. Abbey works in a forensics lab (which is quite small) and seems to deal with ALL forensics. She works alone. For a start that breaks the chain of evidence (she could be tampering with it and nobody would know) and secondly we're now watching season 8 or 9? Right about now she should be done processing the backlog from Season 3. But it doesn't matter because what she's generating is crap as well you can't do that with a gas spectrometer.

Funny thing about that one? The actress has a degree in forensic science and DOES know what a gas spec' can and cannot do even though the character she plays who is a forensic scientist apparently doesn't.

Gibbs was also fired in season 1 for disobeying direct orders.

UI written in Visual Basic? That bit is actually very real, welcome to the world of bespoke software. Floating around out there are mission critical applications welded together from Delphi and VB with a smattering of shell scripts behind them. The people in question paid millions for it, the staff constantly biatch about it and it takes 30 min to redraw the screen.... even on a octo-core multi-Xeon class processor wielding workstation (which they haven't got, it's a Celeron with 512MB RAM).
 
2012-03-14 08:53:30 AM
OK what is wrong with the first one? Her computer is broken and some geek come around to fix it, he recovers the files (probably from the recycle bin) and then defragged the disc. Other than a possible time disparity on defragging a hard drive there doesn't seem to be too much technically wrong. He then plays some Second Life style beta which he says still has some kinks but overclocking makes it kick. I'm not really seeing a 2 person 1 keyboard problem here.
 
2012-03-14 08:54:07 AM

Archie Goodwin: thecpt: I walked in on a Glee line that made me cringe, girl said she was trolling in an internet forum to find information. Lurking and trolling are apparently the same thing to kids/idiots.

Trolling will get you information. Mainly where to go and what to do with yourself when you get there.


Except it was the innocent teenage girl looking for information on pregnancy or whatever. Based on your technicality, that would have made for an interesting character dynamic. Alas, not the case.
 
2012-03-14 08:54:23 AM

blipponaut: I use IRC, am I a hacker?


do you speak leet?
 
2012-03-14 08:54:40 AM
My understanding is that these tv shows are in alternate universe where the technology is different and therefore works as they claim...

Still wakes me cringe all the time... But I tell myself that it's only a tv show, once I stop rocking myself.
 
2012-03-14 08:57:06 AM
Last week's BBT annoyed the shiat out of me too -- they were all playing SWTOR on laptops WITHOUT MICE.
 
2012-03-14 08:57:19 AM

whistlerdash: it saddens me that they get away with this stuff. Their entire thought process is "no one watching will know the difference so who cares". The unfortunate/annoying part is, it'd take all of about 10 minutes worth of work to get it right/not fill your show with wild inaccuracies. This doesn't apply only to tech stuff (although it's usually the most blatant disregard for reality), but military protocol, police protocol, etc.


also: The Voice of Doom:
The one thing I would kinda defend is that garbage IP address. One could argue that they were doing the IP version of a 555 telephone number.

That's why they do that: I can't remember where, but I do remember an interview with someone once (I do remember the show I was reading about was known for being fairly accurate), they intentionally choose a random series of numbers that couldn't possibly translate to an actual IP on purpose. The few times they use an actual address, it usually belongs to a domain they've registered to promote the site.


I don't buy the 555 argument. If that was the case, they could easily use IPs reserved for private networks, like the 192 and 10 ranges. They would look fine and you would not bother anyone's server on the tubes.

I think they just told the actress, mash is some numbers. The only requirement is that they be in sets of three seperated by a persiod.

//Red Dwarf... uncrop .. full of win.
 
2012-03-14 09:04:41 AM
Cracked did it.
 
2012-03-14 09:08:37 AM

wingnut396: I don't buy the 555 argument. If that was the case, they could easily use IPs reserved for private networks, like the 192 and 10 ranges. They would look fine and you would not bother anyone's server on the tubes.


Weird thing, from what I remember of the final specs the address given in Jericho is perfectly valid for a Fidonet system (you boosted the first numbers to silly proportions when making a private network) which could take 999:999,999,999.999 (the final dot XXX being private mail clients hanging off of the BBS with that address and known as 'points').

Hence I was known in my circle of friends as 'the lost point' as I'd gotten horribly lost getting to a meet up and was, at the time, not a sysop just a mail sucker.
 
2012-03-14 09:09:45 AM

thecpt: I walked in on a Glee line that made me cringe, girl said she was trolling in an internet forum to find information. Lurking and trolling are apparently the same thing to kids/idiots.


The phrase "trolling for information" predates the existence of computers by a century or so. Not Glee's fault that you're suffering from the "the Wolfman is just a cheap Twilight ripoff" fallacy.

//Both phrases ultimately refer to a method of fishing in which baited lines are pulled by a moving boat. Colloquially, it means moving through your acquaintances or contacts at random to see if anyone knows the information for which you're looking. "Trawling", which refers to dragging a net rather than lines, is used essentially identically when referring to information-gathering.
 
2012-03-14 09:11:20 AM
apcmag.com

This is Unix, I know this.
 
2012-03-14 09:17:29 AM

FarkGrudge: (like watching Golden Eye where she orders a bunch of IBM-compatible computers with 64 meg hard drives, CD-ROM, and 14.4 kbps modems),


Yeah but there was the whole thing with the "Spike" program. And the computer programmer who used "chair" as his password.

I used to watch Las Vegas with James Caan. They could take any blurry image from a security camera and run "facial recognition" and get the person's name. And then of course there's the "ENHANCE. ENHANCE. ENHANCE" thing.
 
2012-03-14 09:18:09 AM
Holding the controller at maximum arms length and flailing your arms like a mental patient seems to be absent.

/or maybe I do it wrong.
 
2012-03-14 09:21:00 AM
Everyone around me thinks I can "fix" their computer because I know how to use mine, despite the fact I use a Mac and they all use PCs. I keep telling them being a good driver doesn't make you a mechanic, but they don't listen.

And - no lie - I've been asked to blow up and enhance a photo; I wanted to yell at them news-monster style ... PHOTOSHOP DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!

I blame stupid TV shows like the ones in TFA.
 
2012-03-14 09:21:37 AM

dennysgod: [apcmag.com image 625x423]

This is Unix, I know this.


That IS Unix though. It's a 3D file system browser that came as part of Irix if I remember. It has been subsequently ported to regular Linux/BSD.

The oddity is that both she (due to her age) and Nerdly (due to being the SysAdmin) would know about it and use it as it's a highly inefficient way of managing a file system.
 
2012-03-14 09:25:58 AM

wingnut396: I don't buy the 555 argument. If that was the case, they could easily use IPs reserved for private networks, like the 192 and 10 ranges. They would look fine and you would not bother anyone's server on the tubes.

I think they just told the actress, mash is some numbers. The only requirement is that they be in sets of three seperated by a persiod.


This is what I've always said. Yeah, we'd know that the reserved addresses are invalid, but at least they're possible...just like a 555 number.

And I actually saw one show (possibly CSI:Miami) where, not only did they use numbers in the thousands, they had 5 octets. Something like 34.1304.563.122.2715.

I've seen one show use a real IP address, and they probably shouldn't have. Couple of weeks ago on Castle, during that CIA plot, they were tracing the IP of a computer in the CIA's local network. But when they traced it, instead of getting gibberish or a private address, they got a real valid IP...belonging to some media consultant out in LA. I now assume that consultant is a CIA front.
 
2012-03-14 09:26:03 AM
Also ... When they make these shows and movies, they're editing them in computers and using computers to do digital effects ...

Do NONE of the editors or VFX people speak up? Or is the thought, "meh, I'm getting paid ..."?

I wonder the same when it comes to writing. Surely, with so many writers working on a show or film, flagrant plot holes don't go unnoticed, yet they stay in the finished product ...
 
2012-03-14 09:27:34 AM

RivenSilver: Last week's BBT annoyed the shiat out of me too -- they were all playing SWTOR on laptops WITHOUT MICE.


I don't know. it might be possible if you set up enough hot keys. or you are REALLY good with that touch pad thing.
 
2012-03-14 09:28:26 AM
My wife watches all of those CSI type shows and this (and the fact that you can figure out the 'bad' guy in 3 minutes of watching) is why I simply can't watch them.

Of course it goes well beyond the computer issues. I'm a biologist and what they do in their way too dark and colorfully lit labs for "evidence" makes me want to punch things as well.
 
2012-03-14 09:28:39 AM

Vaneshi: The oddity is that both she (due to her age) and Nerdly (due to being the SysAdmin) would know about it and use it as it's a highly inefficient way of managing a file system


Well for one it's a Spielberg film. The kid is always either a genius or a brat or both. And the graphic interface is more cinematic than a command prompt.
 
2012-03-14 09:29:19 AM

Lernaeus: news-monster style


Morbo, you philistine.
 
2012-03-14 09:31:02 AM

thecpt: Based on your technicality, that would have made for an interesting character dynamic.


Glee's been very careful to avoid those.
 
2012-03-14 09:32:23 AM

Jim_Callahan: thecpt: I walked in on a Glee line that made me cringe, girl said she was trolling in an internet forum to find information. Lurking and trolling are apparently the same thing to kids/idiots.

The phrase "trolling for information" predates the existence of computers by a century or so. Not Glee's fault that you're suffering from the "the Wolfman is just a cheap Twilight ripoff" fallacy.

//Both phrases ultimately refer to a method of fishing in which baited lines are pulled by a moving boat. Colloquially, it means moving through your acquaintances or contacts at random to see if anyone knows the information for which you're looking. "Trawling", which refers to dragging a net rather than lines, is used essentially identically when referring to information-gathering.


I was gonna say this so THIS!

What gets me about the cop shows is how they'll walk into a room, see a weapon, bullet, something interesting, and just reach down and pick it up barehanded without taking pictures to document exactly how it was positioned, and or putting on gloves to not screw up fingerprints.
 
2012-03-14 09:33:14 AM

PainInTheASP: Things that bug me about TV, #2966:

How come every video game on TV sounds like the Atari 2600 version of Pac Man?

/Probably made more $$ of that damn sound than they did selling the game.


Don't forget 2600 Donkey Kong. Though I guess they'd have to pay royalties to the Rod Serling estate for sounds from Haunted House.
 
2012-03-14 09:36:22 AM

ManateeGag: RivenSilver: Last week's BBT annoyed the shiat out of me too -- they were all playing SWTOR on laptops WITHOUT MICE.

I don't know. it might be possible if you set up enough hot keys. or you are REALLY good with that touch pad thing.


I have a confession to make...

...I've never played TOR with anything BUT my laptop's touchpad.

My gaming computer's mobo died a week or two before TOR came out. It was getting old anyway, so I'm going to replace the entire rig at some point, but I'm slowly saving up cash. So until then, laptop it is. Luckily, I am pretty decent with a touchpad.

'Course, there's probably a reason I haven't been on it much recently.
 
2012-03-14 09:37:31 AM

Lernaeus: Do NONE of the editors or VFX people speak up? Or is the thought, "meh, I'm getting paid ..."?


That second one. Trust me.
 
2012-03-14 09:38:39 AM
I don't know all that much about computers and what not, but I do know that I would very much like to penis that chick in the two keyboards clip.
 
2012-03-14 09:41:45 AM
It's not just TV. WTF was up with The Dark Knight when Wayne pulls out pieces of a bullet out of a wall, reconstructs them and gets a finger print off it? Even if that were possible, wouldn't the print be on the shell casing, not the bullet itself? That was as bad as anything on CSI.
 
2012-03-14 09:41:46 AM
 
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