WOW these are the best:

"Candidate was arrested by federal authorities during the interview when the background check revealed the person had an outstanding warrant."

"On the way to the interview, the candidate passed, cut-off, and flipped his middle finger at the driver who happened to be the interviewer."

I just can't imagine what goes through their minds when this happens.

I'm not sure I agree that some of these incidents were mistakes.

FTA: Candidate asked for a sip of the interviewer's coffee.

What better way to establish a trusting relationship between an applicant and a potential employer? It's flattering toward the interviewer, if you think about it. "I'm not scared of your cooties. Would you mind if I borrowed some of your Carmex too?"

When a candidate interviewing for a security position wasn't hired on the spot, he painted graffiti on the building.

While a knee-jerk reaction would be to consider this as an act of vengeance, it's also a thoughtful way of challenging the firm to re-assess their current priorities. Sometimes making a visual, public statement is the only way to encourage policy-makers to question their own antiquated thinking, especially where "inappropriate" employee behavior might have actually been done for the good of the company. Indeed, that vandalism wouldn't have happened if the applicant had been hired as security. Thus, if there was a mistake made, it was by the employer.

Candidate told the interviewer she wasn't sure if the job offered was worth "starting the car for."

Playing hard to get. It's a classic form of reverse psychology, and I'd be surprised if it didn't result in a job offer for a position higher than was applied for.

What if you're interviewing for a Boy Scout job?

Many years ago at an old job of mine a young fellow came in my store asked for a job while packing a blunt with another joint behind his ear.

Actually, the easiest kind of interview mistake to make is misunderstanding what type of interview you're going in for. That's based on my own experience.

What I'm talking about is when the company says Interview A is only intended to be an informational, but its actually used to weed out people. Or when the company says Interview B requires no preparation, but in reality that's completely untrue. Or when the company says Interview C will be about your background, when its really about how much you know about the company based off rote memorization of their press material.

I can't wait for all the high-powered HR executives to some tell us all the insane but totally true interview stories they've experienced as head of the HR department for P&G or some other Fortune 500.

Im always so nervous at interviews. My biggest fear is that I will babble on and on about something not related to the interview.

Clothing Store Woman: Can I help you?
Sean: Yeah, I called about the job.
Clothing Store Woman: You called?
Sean: Yeah, I wanna sell clothes, womens clothes.
Clothing Store Woman: I don't know. Have you ever had experience?
Sean: With what?
Clothing Store Woman: Womens clothes?
Sean: What the fark would I be doing with womens clothes? What do I look like a transvestite? I'm not no farking transvestite, all right?
Clothing Store Woman: No, no, no, I mean, have you ever worked in retail?
Sean: Huh?
Clothing Store Woman: You know, selling... clothes
Sean: Well if I was selling clothes already, what would I be doing here? I really don't think this is the right way to start a working relationship. You got a real, a real bad attitude, lady. In fact I don't even want you job, I don't care how much you'd pay me, cause I got integrity, in-farking-tegrity!

I don't know about this interview part of the job, but I do remember quitting Benegan's when I was in college. I told them I was dying of a rare heart condition. I still feel slightly bad about that one... yeah yeah, css

My first lawyering job I got because I didn't freak out when the security guard somehow lost my drivers license during the interview. They thought that was nice of me; didn't find that out until about two years in.

Evil Mackerel: Many years ago at an old job of mine a young fellow came in my store asked for a job while packing a blunt with another joint behind his ear.

Did you work at a donut shop, pizza place or Taco Bell?

Wellon Dowd: Asking to see the interviewer's tits. Especially if it's a dude.

So it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission?

Repeat. (new window)

Without annoying slideshow this time?

Candidate wore a Boy Scout uniform and never told interviewers why.

GENIUS!

/I would hire the guy just to find out why...

"Doing your son?"

Stabone33: Repeat. (new window)

Without annoying slideshow this time?

That's only because WXYZ didn't use the pics from the Forbes article the orginal thread is about.

The only blatant mistake I made when showing up do an interview once, was I went out and bought new clothes to wear to it right beforehand... and then missed/forgot to take all the tags off. So im sitting in the interview room with stickers/tags on my new pants.

Luckily some other employee walked by and was kind enough to inform me before I actually met the interviewer.

/Got the job

MarshHawk: I'm not sure I agree that some of these incidents were mistakes.

FTA: Candidate asked for a sip of the interviewer's coffee.

What better way to establish a trusting relationship between an applicant and a potential employer? It's flattering toward the interviewer, if you think about it. "I'm not scared of your cooties. Would you mind if I borrowed some of your Carmex too?"

Do you know what Diet Coke feels like when it comes out your nose? I do now, thanks. ;-)

Cyno01: Yeah, female interviewers wearing low cut tops. Sit there thinking "don't look at her chest, don't look at her chest" "uh, what was the question?" "shiat".

I've known quite a few women who do this purposefully, not just in interviews. My last boss didn't come in one freaking day without having a shamelessly low top, and it was because she wasn't particularly smart.

It worked for her though, even though she was 50 and not attractive in any natural sense ('cept the big titties). It's quite a dastardly way of doing 'business.'

Sometimes the interviewer can fark things up as bad as the interviewee.

I had a phone interview a few months ago, and the woman who owned the company kept referring to her "accident." She indicated it had resulted in some physical injuries for her, but I'll be damned if it didn't mess with her brain as well. She couldn't finish a sentence any better than Gingrich can finish a marriage.

Toward the end of the interview, she said she was looking forward to hiring another woman so she'd have someone to have "girl chat" with. I said, "Excuse me?" And she said, "You know, girl chat. Like you stay with me after your shift and we drink margaritas and hang out."

/DEALBREAKER

I always wanted to go to an interview for a high-powered job that I had no interest in getting, dressed in my best suit, with a live grasshopper pinned to my lapel. That, or go in with a giant, kindergarten style grape Kool-Aid moustache. If the interviewer pointed out either of the eccentricities, I would shake my head & claim I did not know what they were talking about.

/"doing your....son?"

BigNumber12: Answering cell phone or texting


If you're this stupid, you don't deserve employment.

I was wondering about that one myself. Just... whip it out and do a green deal all Harold and Kumar style?

Who does this?

Giving the interviewer any possible excuse to reject you, no matter how small or innocuous; one the interviewer has probably made in the past, anything, DON'T DO IT.

Oh and be perfect but not overqualified.

Does this help?

Candidate referred to himself in the third person.

The mistake being that only people in positions of authority are allowed to do this.

In my experience, the people who do the craziest shiat on interviews are TRYING to not get hired, they just want to look like they're looking for work so they can keep getting unemployment benefits. Had one scumbag in our lobby pick up an application, leaf through it and loudly proclaim "Jesus Christ, you guys got me writing a farkin' book here, you gonna gimme a prostate check too?"

Oh, and whenever I'm interviewing peopple for jobs but I am ALWAYS shocked and amazed at the number of slobs who come in looking like absolute shiat. Ripped and stained clothes, wearing band t-shirts and shorts, messed up hair etc.

I never understand what the hell these people are thinking. Why cant you take a shower before a job interview?

/and yes, I judge you based on what car you drive and the condition of it. You can tell a tremendous amount about a person based on their vehicle.

At the software company I work for I am in charge of the "cultural" interview...asking questions to see if someone will fit in the culture of the company not necessarily if they are qualified.

I asked one person what their dream software project would be, he told me "Databases, anything with databases." Another guy told me his favorite website was Newgrounds (he got hired actually).

I like to look at people's Facebook pages as well, one candidate had nothing but Mafia Wars groups and likes on his page...I did not recommend him.

In my department I actually hire the people. I hired one guy based on a good interview and resume, he claimed to have knowledge of programming and some other technical things. He showed up at work the next day dressed in a t-shirt and jeans with sandals and then 4 days later he told me the job was too hard and he quit. He then tried to get unemployment.

Q: "How do you see your future self in this company?"
A: "Sitting in your chair ... ."

lakrfool: I always wanted to go to an interview for a high-powered job that I had no interest in getting, dressed in my best suit, with a live grasshopper pinned to my lapel. That, or go in with a giant, kindergarten style grape Kool-Aid moustache. If the interviewer pointed out either of the eccentricities, I would shake my head & claim I did not know what they were talking about.

/"doing your....son?"

For ones I didn't want, I always had the strongest urge to start picking my nose. Like really intently picking it, as though something foreign was lodged up there. Then when they ask if you need a tissue you bewilderdly ask, why on earth for?

/protip - doesn't work for phone interviews
//for those do the constant clicking sound with the back of your throat

Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never met, never had no problem with, get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shiat. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile, he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And, of course, the oil companies used the skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them, but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, of course, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and farkin' play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the farkin' job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin', 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat, the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fark it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.

Odd Bird: Evil Mackerel: Many years ago at an old job of mine a young fellow came in my store asked for a job while packing a blunt with another joint behind his ear.

Did you work at a donut shop, pizza place or Taco Bell?

Wellon Dowd: Asking to see the interviewer's tits. Especially if it's a dude.

So it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission?

Worse,Autozone.

I passed out during one of those intense interview questions designed to measure how well you handle pressure, but in my defense I was still really, really drunk.

Me: "Can you describe an incident where you had to make a snap decision or take a risk?"

Interviewee proceeds to describe an incident for which he was formally reprimanded for breaking basic safety and security rules.

What level employee was boy-scout-uniform-man applying for?

I'd walk into an interview with HEB as stocker in a boy scout uniform, if I was 16. I mean, it says something about your character. I'm responsible, prepared, and reliable. Something to that effect. If you're 30, and interviewing for any position in an office environment, probably not gonna work out so well. If you're any age and a wino, looking for work, if it's your clean shirt? Give it a whirl, see how it works out.