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(The Week)   What to expect from tonight's GOP debate... aka the season finale of American Political Gladiators   (theweek.com) divider line 79
    More: Asinine, GOP, human beings, democratic debate, iPhone users, Scott Pelley, brokered conventions, Groundhog Day, By the Numbers  
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884 clicks; posted to Politics » on 22 Feb 2012 at 12:53 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-02-22 11:15:02 AM
10 pounds of derp in a five pound sack?
 
2012-02-22 11:29:18 AM
A little song
A little dance
A little seltzer down Mitt's pants
 
2012-02-22 11:41:33 AM
DUDE! Great idea!! Could you imagine them playing Assault?? We could put it on Pay-per-view!!
 
2012-02-22 11:42:10 AM
A retarded dog & pony show, I'm guessing...

Maybe we'll get to see and hear the crowd cheer homeless people freezing to death or women getting raped, too.
 
2012-02-22 11:53:01 AM
maxcdn.fooyoh.com
Welcome to another edition of THUNDERDOME!
 
2012-02-22 11:54:11 AM
We'll see Romney trying to hold on by attacking Santorum endlessly, and thus alienating himself from his base. We'll see Santorum trying to hold on by spouting the same nonsense that made him the front-runner, and thus alienating himself from everyone outside of his base. We'll see Gingrich trying to be relevant, and we'll see Ron Paul continue deluding himself into thinking he's a part of this process.
 
2012-02-22 11:57:30 AM

keylock71: Maybe we'll get to see and hear the crowd cheer homeless people freezing to death or women getting raped, too.


I love the part were they use gold gilded welfare mother's skulls encrusted with African Blood Diamonds to drink the blood of service men and women who died while killing brown people. While they smoke cigars! IN DOORS!!

such good times
 
2012-02-22 12:20:49 PM
I want to see a serious dogpile on Santorum. I hope the questions are fast, furious, and designed to draw serious blood. I want to see moderators double down on any question that dares draw a complaint.
 
2012-02-22 12:24:22 PM
If I wasn't sitting here working a convention in Vegas, I'd PS Santorum and Romney's heads on some American Gladiators.

/I'd make Santorum Malibu
 
2012-02-22 12:26:54 PM

Somacandra: I want to see a serious dogpile on Santorum. I hope the questions are fast, furious, and designed to draw serious blood. I want to see moderators double down on any question that dares draw a complaint.


You mean you want to see Newt throw a temper tantrum?

/I'd go for that
 
2012-02-22 12:41:54 PM
Somewhat unrelated, but "ultra-liberal" NPR has been covering the Republican tard parade in excruciating detail every day for months. I realize that the NPR editors strain to appear objective and thus try to treat these candidates as if they were serious statesmen, but it consumes the entire prime time drive. Twenty straight minutes of analysis about which candidate is saying what and how the numbers look. An American journalist was killed in a Syrian shelling raid, but all I heard on NPR is Mitt Romney's chances of catching up to the other retards in tonite's scintillating and intellectually robust debate.

Really, NPR?
 
2012-02-22 12:50:56 PM

CitizenTed: An American journalist was killed in a Syrian shelling raid, but all I heard on NPR is Mitt Romney's chances of catching up to the other retards in tonite's scintillating and intellectually robust debate


That's odd. I heard a great segment this morning (just after 6:30AM) by Lourdes Garcia-Navarro about Marie Colvin on NPR.
 
2012-02-22 12:55:39 PM
I expect Santorum to perform an exorcism.
 
2012-02-22 12:56:34 PM
Another debate?

And how exactly will this one be any different from the previous fifty debates? It's another 2 hours of the remaining four candidates throwing mud at each other and not getting the party anywhere closer to having a nomination.
 
2012-02-22 12:57:27 PM
Overture, curtain, lights,
This is it, the night of nights
No more rehearsing and nursing our parts
We know every part by heart
Overture, curtain, lights
This is it, we'll hit the heights
And oh what heights we'll hit
On with the show this is it!
 
2012-02-22 12:58:43 PM
I'm watching it! This has been the most entertaining primary ever!
 
2012-02-22 01:01:08 PM
This debate is going to be farking awesome. Mitt and Frothy are pretty much tied in Michigan so they're going to be taking the gloves off and Newt is going to be flinging shiat all over hoping that something sticks. This is some must see TV.
 
2012-02-22 01:01:18 PM
I'm not watching. Drinking game rules apply and I'm not sure my liver is up to the formidable task.
 
2012-02-22 01:02:26 PM
Yeah, gladiators...

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-02-22 01:02:51 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: DUDE! Great idea!! Could you imagine them playing Assault?? We could put it on Pay-per-view!!


Ladies and Gentlemen, the Republican party.

Are the candidates really that dumb or are they acting to appear on the same level as teabaggers like Hippo here.

This has been amazing entertainment though so I cant complain too much.

Derp Wars: My favorite tv show this season.
 
2012-02-22 01:03:23 PM

9beers: This debate is going to be farking awesome. Mitt and Frothy are pretty much tied in Michigan so they're going to be taking the gloves off and Newt is going to be flinging shiat all over hoping that something sticks. This is some must see TV.


Seeing as Newt seems destined to lose, do you think he'll be backing up Santorum and shiatting on Romney?
 
2012-02-22 01:03:30 PM

Philip Francis Queeg: I expect Santorum to perform an exorcism.


Or an excommunication.
 
2012-02-22 01:03:43 PM
I probably would watch this insanity if the Bruins weren't playing tonight...

I'll just catch the lowlights in the morning, I guess.
 
2012-02-22 01:04:22 PM
Santorum is just going to repeat "Mitt is just like Obama" over and over and over again.

Among GOP voters, this will be the equivalent of disclosing that Romney is involved in incestuous sexual fecal scat play with his illegitimate black son that he conceived while attending a black mass at the Church of Satan, and became romantically involved with while attending Pride parade.
 
2012-02-22 01:04:51 PM
The Inquisition!

truthquake.com

Let's begin!
 
2012-02-22 01:05:57 PM

CitizenTed: An American journalist was killed in a Syrian shelling raid


I heard NPR discuss this this morning.
 
2012-02-22 01:07:33 PM
I like watching Gingbiatch when he finishes one of his talking points.... when he quickly scans his eyes left to right to see if anyone visibly reacted to his bullshiat lie.
You can just SEE and feel how he reaches.... then after no one guffaws at his comments he thinks he just created a new "truth".
It's like that person we all know... the one that wants to control a conversation by trying to be this fountain of knowledge... you know they are full of it, but it's not even worth arguing with them. Some of the people around you buy into it and they get to keep expanding on the B.S.

The republican debates are like this. You feel sorry for the people that actually believe what's being said.
 
2012-02-22 01:13:58 PM

InmanRoshi: Santorum is just going to repeat "Mitt is just like Obama" over and over and over again.

Among GOP voters, this will be the equivalent of disclosing that Romney is involved in incestuous sexual fecal scat play with his illegitimate black son that he conceived while attending a black mass at the Church of Satan, and became romantically involved with while attending Pride parade.



That's exactly why I want Mitt to get the nomination.
 
2012-02-22 01:14:00 PM
My name is hammettman and I'm a derpaholic.
 
2012-02-22 01:15:04 PM

culebra: The Inquisition!

[truthquake.com image 528x315]

Let's begin!


Are you kidding, no one expects ... well, OK, if Santorum becomes president, yeah I will expect an American Inquisition.
 
2012-02-22 01:15:54 PM
i1100.photobucket.com

i570.photobucket.com

i1090.photobucket.com
 
2012-02-22 01:18:39 PM

CitizenTed: Somewhat unrelated, but "ultra-liberal" NPR has been covering the Republican tard parade in excruciating detail every day for months. I realize that the NPR editors strain to appear objective and thus try to treat these candidates as if they were serious statesmen, but it consumes the entire prime time drive. Twenty straight minutes of analysis about which candidate is saying what and how the numbers look. An American journalist was killed in a Syrian shelling raid, but all I heard on NPR is Mitt Romney's chances of catching up to the other retards in tonite's scintillating and intellectually robust debate.

Really, NPR?


Well, they did do a segment on Syria and Colvin's death this morning while I was driving, but I agree that they seem to be giving too much attention to the lunatic GOP horse race.

/Although I LOL'd this morning when they interviewed one primary voter who said something about God telling him to vote for Santorum.
 
2012-02-22 01:19:26 PM
This will probably be the night where everybody goes after Santorum. RON PAUL is running ads against him in Michigan, and so is Romney. Wait until someone asks 'did you really haul your miscarriage around' and let him freak out. It'll be beautiful.
 
2012-02-22 01:22:37 PM

epoc_tnac: Seeing as Newt seems destined to lose, do you think he'll be backing up Santorum and shiatting on Romney?


I think Newt is still delusional enough to think he has a chance so he'll be shiatting on both equally.
 
2012-02-22 01:23:55 PM

dletter: If I wasn't sitting here working a convention in Vegas, I'd PS Santorum and Romney's heads on some American Gladiators.

/I'd make Santorum Malibu


Offtopic: What convention are you working?
 
2012-02-22 01:23:56 PM
Hilarious gifs too big to post

These are my absolute favorite things to come from the primaries.
 
2012-02-22 01:25:46 PM

moralpanic: I'm watching it! This has been the most entertaining primary ever!


img.photobucket.com
 
2012-02-22 01:25:49 PM
farm3.static.flickr.com
 
2012-02-22 01:26:07 PM

Guntram Shatterhand: This will probably be the night where everybody goes after Santorum. RON PAUL is running ads against him in Michigan, and so is Romney. Wait until someone asks 'did you really haul your miscarriage around' and let him freak out. It'll be beautiful.


These debates have been so crappy. I really hope someone asks about jarbaby, but they won't. I am a pessimist. Is there any reason to believe that the moderators will ask incisive questions and--gasp--press for a real answer instead of iloveronaldreaganandwecanmakeamericabetterandrescueitfromseekritmuuusl inobamer?
 
2012-02-22 01:28:28 PM
I really want to see these guys play chess against eachother, or maybe Battleship. I'd pay double a movie ticket price to watch Ron Paul protest his fleet getting destroyed the entire match, declaring he never would've sent the ships to the engagement in the first place.
 
2012-02-22 01:29:15 PM
I am glad I dropped cable a few months ago. I get to miss out on this derpfest on CNN.
 
2012-02-22 01:30:55 PM

A Terrible Human: Hilarious gifs too big to post

These are my absolute favorite things to come from the primaries.


LOL @ Amontillado
 
2012-02-22 01:31:30 PM
It's astounding
time is fleeting
Madness takes it's toll
But listen closely (not for very much longer)
I've got to keep control
 
2012-02-22 01:31:39 PM

PunchDrunkPanda: I really want to see these guys play chess against eachother, or maybe Battleship. I'd pay double a movie ticket price to watch Ron Paul protest his fleet getting destroyed the entire match, declaring he never would've sent the ships to the engagement in the first place.


I'd pay good money to watch Romney try to convert the other candidate's ships to his board after they'd been sunk.

Santorum, after having his battleship sunk, would put it in a jar and take it home to his family.

Gingrich would just lewdly grind his pelvis against the game board.
 
2012-02-22 01:36:28 PM
The only hope Mittens has now of winning the nomination is for Gingrich, RON PAUL, and Frothy Rick to keep the conservative vote divided.
 
2012-02-22 01:37:18 PM

culebra: PunchDrunkPanda: I really want to see these guys play chess against eachother, or maybe Battleship. I'd pay double a movie ticket price to watch Ron Paul protest his fleet getting destroyed the entire match, declaring he never would've sent the ships to the engagement in the first place.

I'd pay good money to watch Romney try to convert the other candidate's ships to his board after they'd been sunk.

Santorum, after having his battleship sunk, would put it in a jar and take it home to his family.

Gingrich would just lewdly grind his pelvis against the game board.


Battleship would be the appropriate choice. It represents their women's rights policies so well.


kpbs.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com
 
2012-02-22 01:37:24 PM
Two things: Herp, and it's close cousin (but not too close not to fark) Derp.
 
2012-02-22 01:40:09 PM
nissan-leaf.net
ARRRRRE YOUUU RRRRREADY TO RRRRRREEEEEEETAAAAAARRRRRRRRD??!
 
2012-02-22 01:43:55 PM

Philip Francis Queeg: exorcism


I expect Romney to perform a baptism.
 
2012-02-22 01:46:43 PM
Too bad I have to get up tomorrow or we could play the Political Debate Drinking Game.
(quickly updated from old drinking game rules, needs more)

Take a sip every time:

A candidate mentions Ronald Reagan
Newt Gingrich interrupts the moderator
Mitt Romney laughs at one of his own jokes
Mitt Romney says "jobs"
Mitt Romney has that, "How the fark are these people close to me in the polls" look
Whenever anyone acknowledges the existence of Ron Paul


Take a chug every time:

A candidate mentions a country other than America, Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan
A candidate says "Occupy Wall Street" in a sentence that doesn't contain the words, "nonsense," "hippie," "spoiled," "misguided," or "Soros-funded granola-fueled anything-goes sex caravan."

Finish your drink every time:

A candidate takes out a picture of Ronald Reagan from their wallet and kisses it
A candidate says "Obamacare" while making a masturbation gesture with his or her hand
Newt Gingrich asks for twelve more minutes of time and is awarded it
Rick Santorum's phone goes off to reveal that his ringtone is Cher's "Believe"

/definitely needs more rules
 
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