FARK.com: (6955883) Bet no one saw this coming. Mormons target Anne Frank for posthumous baptism

If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

		Bet no one saw this coming. Mormons target Anne Frank for posthumous baptism (huffingtonpost.com)		206
		More: Asinine, Anne Frank, Mormons, baptism for the dead

• • •

6156 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2012 at 9:22 AM | Favorite | share:

Share this link:

URL:

http://fark.com/go/6955883

Bookmark:

Article Comments close

206 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all

AverageAmericanGuy		2012-02-22 06:40:36 AM

Now she'll finally get to go to Heaven.

gopher321		2012-02-22 07:06:09 AM

I think these Mormons should be religiously circumcised as Jewish, since they're big fans of foisting their beliefs on others.

Marcus Aurelius		2012-02-22 08:49:40 AM

gopher321: I think these Mormons should be religiously circumcised as Jewish, since they're big fans of foisting their beliefs on others.

Not all Jews are like that. Just last week, a neighborhood Jewish kid told me to stay out of his mother's vagina. He obviously didn't want me accidentally turning Jewish.

strangeguitar		2012-02-22 09:23:56 AM

They have to find her first.

LarryDan43		2012-02-22 09:26:11 AM

So there Anne is, happily sitting in a field of flowers chatting with her mother and grandmother when suddenly she ripped away and brought to mormon heaven where she knows no one. Think she'll find a place to hide?

meanmutton		2012-02-22 09:26:13 AM

gopher321: I think these Mormons should be religiously circumcised as Jewish, since they're big fans of foisting their beliefs on others.

Yeah, that's exactly the same thing.

Jackpot777		2012-02-22 09:26:29 AM

This thread has much potential. I shall keep an eye on it.

Colin O'Scopy		2012-02-22 09:26:34 AM

Baptisms: They're all imaginary anyways. What's the big deal.

Sock Ruh Tease		2012-02-22 09:26:56 AM

I thought Mormons would consider a woman flying around the world as an affront to God, but I guess I was wrong.

Lone Stranger		2012-02-22 09:27:20 AM

Hide the Frank is a fun game to play.

godofatheist		2012-02-22 09:27:52 AM

here is a thought, if they can posthumously baptize, can we posthumously ex communicate? Im thinking we do so to a few of the religious leaders of the world who have passed on and invalidate their teachings, a few excommunicated popes = no vatican law.

Hector Remarkable		2012-02-22 09:28:03 AM

R.I.P. Anne Frank

meanmutton		2012-02-22 09:28:31 AM

Maybe it's because I'm an atheist, but I honestly don't see why anyone would be upset about this. It's a bunch of idiots saying a few words including your name decades after you're dead thousands of miles away from where you lived. How the fark is that supposed to affect you?

Is there some tenet of Judaism I don't know about that says that if someone you've never met says a few magical words decades after your death that you magically fall out of heaven?

Arkanaut		2012-02-22 09:28:36 AM

No, I did Nazi that coming.

/oblig

theorellior		2012-02-22 09:28:53 AM

WAAAAH-WAAAAH!

vudukungfu		2012-02-22 09:28:54 AM

bet she didn't see that coming.

DrBear		2012-02-22 09:29:49 AM

Nothing to do with the real topic but:

(from a comment at kenlevine.blogspot.com)

My all time favorite Anne Frank gag was that when Pia Zadora played Anne Frank onstage at Burt Reynolds's Theater in Florida about 25 years ago, when the Nazis arrived at the end of act II, the entire audience shouted: "THEY'RE IN THE ATTIC!" (Not my gag, sadly, but a great one.)

Famous Thamas		2012-02-22 09:31:55 AM

So wait a minute. Mormons actually do this? They try to lay claim to deceased people by baptizing after they die? Do they think this automatically makes the person and their family a member of the Mormon church?

squirrel_spam		2012-02-22 09:32:36 AM

Sorry, can't help myself.

//Anyone willing to posthumously grant me a TF sponsership?

Twist2005		2012-02-22 09:34:17 AM

Are they just trolling at this point?

Poison		2012-02-22 09:34:55 AM

Ahh, organized religious idiocy. Just love organized religion. A nice start to the day. Shouldn't they (Morons) out be looking for those magical gold plates lost in the Utah wilderness?

Wellon Dowd		2012-02-22 09:36:00 AM

Famous Thamas: So wait a minute. Mormons actually do this? They try to lay claim to deceased people by baptizing after they die? Do they think this automatically makes the person and their family a member of the Mormon church?

It used to be the case that if you went to a church in Ireland to research your ancestors the priest would offer you a whiskey. If you turned it down, he'd assume you were a Mormon looking for names for posthumous baptism and refuse to help you.

That might not be true, but it make a great story.

Now I want a whiskey.

keylock71		2012-02-22 09:36:19 AM

I'm not even religious, but this is pretty pathetic, in my view...

Leave folks who subscribe to other religions out of your self-absorbed, cultish bullshiat, Mormons.

PonceAlyosha		2012-02-22 09:36:21 AM

Famous Thamas: So wait a minute. Mormons actually do this? They try to lay claim to deceased people by baptizing after they die? Do they think this automatically makes the person and their family a member of the Mormon church?

They add the dead to their rolls and use it In their count of total number of Mormons. They do it to claim there are more ormons than actually exist or have existed.

rudemix		2012-02-22 09:36:43 AM

Great response Romney. In things of make believe (religion) it's best to assume everyone takes their make believe as seriously as you do. You don't have to support it, or endorse it, but your make believe shouldn't be taking a giant shiat on the make beliefs of others. Here's our potential future president, a man that would disregard anothers make believe in favor of his own. So for now it's blowing off and/or breaking agreements with jewish requests, how long before there are more. I'd love to see them do this to a pope, just for the anguish and lol options.

Crudbucket		2012-02-22 09:37:51 AM

Famous Thamas: So wait a minute. Mormons actually do this? They try to lay claim to deceased people by baptizing after they die? Do they think this automatically makes the person and their family a member of the Mormon church?

I'm copying this from a red-lit thread because it address your question and I think I sound pithy.

Crudbucket: Vodka Zombie: Crudbucket: Oh no! This means her soul will get kicked out of Jewish heaven and she'll have to move into Mormon heaven now, because baptism-by-proxy actually affects anything!

Well, if you believe in things like souls and afterlives and what have you, I can imagine this sort of thing could be pretty insulting.

FWIW, baptism-by-proxy doesn't automatically make you Mormon, it extends the offer of Mormonimity to your soul in the afterlife. Said soul still has the option of saying, "No thanks, I'm cool with Jewish heaven still." It's insulting in the sense that even after you die, they'll still be ringing your eternal doorbell and asking if you've heard the Good News.

For one monotheistic religion to get up in arms about what some other monotheistic religion is doing is nutty because, by their own beliefs, their god/their understanding of god is the one and only true path, so whatever anyone else is doing is false and irrelevant. To take it seriously, as some might do in this case, invalidates your own belief while strengthening theirs.

ko_kyi		2012-02-22 09:38:15 AM

gopher321: I think these Mormons should be religiously circumcised as Jewish, since they're big fans of foisting their beliefs on others.

After I'm dead, foist away. I won't mind.

Linkage		2012-02-22 09:38:25 AM

R.I.P. Anne Frank

Debeo Summa Credo		2012-02-22 09:39:20 AM

So, this Christ-killer has been burning in hell for 67 years and all of a sudden she's pulled off of Satan's thorny cock to join the followers of some loon who thought he saw an angel in the woods of upstate new york? Is that how this is supposed to work? Sounds like a pretty good deal for her.

Why don't the Mormons retroactively baptize everybody, if that's allowed? Why does Anne Frank get special treatment? There's like 5,999,999 other holocaust victims swimming in a lake of fire right now wishing they had been deaf and dumb too.

Triaxis		2012-02-22 09:39:41 AM

Bet no one saw this coming.

If by that subby mean the Huffer trying to dig up dirt, yeah we did.

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich		2012-02-22 09:39:58 AM

meanmutton: Maybe it's because I'm an atheist, but I honestly don't see why anyone would be upset about this.

I think if it were a simple case of the Mormons believing that one could choose the faith after their death, no one would really have a problem with it. But, even though they believe the dead have a choice, they put them down in their record books as part of the Church, basically saying "they chose us." To speak for the dead in that way, to say that Anne Frank renounced her faith and chose Mormonism is so appallingly arrogant and disrespectful of her memory that it boggles the mind.

IrateShadow		2012-02-22 09:42:16 AM

Crudbucket: I'm copying this from a red-lit thread because it address your question and I think I sound pithy.

Regardless of its actual effect, it's still massively disrespectful to the dead. If I went around pissing on graves, people would be perfectly justified in condemning me, even though it was of no consequence to the dead.

interluder		2012-02-22 09:42:33 AM

Well, it wasn't that she was deaf, dumb and blind that she couldn't drive a car.
It was because she was a woman

Incog_Neeto		2012-02-22 09:44:07 AM

I've baptized everyone in this thread as a Pastafarin while I was typing this by screaming you screen names at a co-worker while taking a shot (It's our way). So suck it.

Hollie Maea		2012-02-22 09:45:40 AM

Debeo Summa Credo: Why don't the Mormons retroactively baptize everybody, if that's allowed?

They're trying to, but first they have to figure out who everyone was. This is the whole point of ancestry.com

/Really.

KrispyKritter		2012-02-22 09:47:50 AM

Colin O'Scopy: Baptisms: They're all imaginary anyways. What's the big deal.

understanding what faith means to the faithful makes it a big deal. you probably have some stupid ideas too; we are all entitled to our own. doing what these people are doing is highly offensive. if i was a ITG Hebrew Hammer i think i might dislike their actions and spew shiat at/about them.

SuperKate		2012-02-22 09:47:59 AM

Kudos subby. I usually hate the AF/HK-mix-up meme, but thought this headline was good.

Crudbucket		2012-02-22 09:48:11 AM

IrateShadow: Crudbucket: I'm copying this from a red-lit thread because it address your question and I think I sound pithy.

Regardless of its actual effect, it's still massively disrespectful to the dead. If I went around pissing on graves, people would be perfectly justified in condemning me, even though it was of no consequence to the dead.

It's offensive if you choose to be offended by it. This is like some people who turn atheist and lobby their church to get taken off the baptism rolls. The only reason it matters is because you still ascribe meaning to it.

PonceAlyosha		2012-02-22 09:48:52 AM

Incog_Neeto: I've baptized everyone in this thread as a Pastafarin while I was typing this by screaming you screen names at a co-worker while taking a shot (It's our way). So suck it.

Yeah but that just means they get infinite spaghetti after death. The Mormons are using Planeshift on the souls of the dead. That's gotta be at least neutral evil.

proteus_b		2012-02-22 09:49:33 AM

that's cool, we posthumously bar mitzvahed joseph smith this morning in tel aviv.

doubled99		2012-02-22 09:52:44 AM

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich 2012-02-22 09:39:58 AM

meanmutton: Maybe it's because I'm an atheist, but I honestly don't see why anyone would be upset about this.

I think if it were a simple case of the Mormons believing that one could choose the faith after their death, no one would really have a problem with it. But, even though they believe the dead have a choice, they put them down in their record books as part of the Church, basically saying "they chose us." To speak for the dead in that way, to say that Anne Frank renounced her faith and chose Mormonism is so appallingly arrogant and disrespectful of her memory that it boggles the mind.

But since she's dead, you know that isn't true. So, where's the offense?
Are you offended if I say your mom's a two dollar whore? If I don't know her, and she isn't, why would you care?

KatjaMouse		2012-02-22 09:52:48 AM

godofatheist: here is a thought, if they can posthumously baptize, can we posthumously ex communicate? Im thinking we do so to a few of the religious leaders of the world who have passed on and invalidate their teachings, a few excommunicated popes = no vatican law.

I know recently on Bill Maher he did a little ceremony on his show to unbaptize Romney's late father-in-law who was an avowed Atheist and someone who openly denounced anyone who would elevate religion and superstition over science and rational thought within his life.

Kraut10		2012-02-22 09:54:00 AM

Sock Ruh Tease: I thought Mormons would consider a woman flying around the world as an affront to God, but I guess I was wrong.

That was Emillia Earheart you are thinking about there. Anne Frank hid in an attic from the natzi's with her familly during WWII. Untill they were ratted out by a neighbor. If this link were'nt broken, you would know that.

Researcher		2012-02-22 09:55:40 AM

meanmutton: Maybe it's because I'm an atheist, but I honestly don't see why anyone would be upset about this. It's a bunch of idiots saying a few words including your name decades after you're dead thousands of miles away from where you lived. How the fark is that supposed to affect you?

Is there some tenet of Judaism I don't know about that says that if someone you've never met says a few magical words decades after your death that you magically fall out of heaven?

First off, it's offensive and insulting. That should be enough. A lot of idiots say of lot of words, some are called racists, others anti-semites, some sexist. Should various and sundry groups cease to be offended over words?

Second, Judaism has existed for thousands of years, and will mostly be here for as long as humanity is. They're playing long game. There's no reason to muddy the waters 500 years down the road. Mormon's hope they last long enough to get some ancient cred and claim to have all these people as part of their FOTM descendant religion.

Third, when people are dead it is custom, if not religious dictate that we show respect to those departed. How would you like to know that after you're dead someone put up a big cross on your grave and wrote "Devout Catholic"? I mean you'd be dead, so no big deal right?

/Nonplussed
//What is not to get?

KatjaMouse		2012-02-22 09:55:57 AM

Kraut10: Sock Ruh Tease: I thought Mormons would consider a woman flying around the world as an affront to God, but I guess I was wrong.

That was Emillia Earheart you are thinking about there. Anne Frank hid in an attic from the natzi's with her familly during WWII. Untill they were ratted out by a neighbor. If this link were'nt broken, you would know that.

That was Helen Keller you dummy.

HailRobonia		2012-02-22 09:56:31 AM

All dead Mormons are now gay.

rudemix		2012-02-22 09:56:35 AM

Crudbucket: IrateShadow: Crudbucket: I'm copying this from a red-lit thread because it address your question and I think I sound pithy.

Regardless of its actual effect, it's still massively disrespectful to the dead. If I went around pissing on graves, people would be perfectly justified in condemning me, even though it was of no consequence to the dead.

It's offensive if you choose to be offended by it. This is like some people who turn atheist and lobby their church to get taken off the baptism rolls. The only reason it matters is because you still ascribe meaning to it.

You're comparing your set of ideal behavior to theirs. Almost as if you're offended by their behavior and response to this. But since people can only be offended if they choose to be this couldn't be the case. Sadly not all people are capable of realizing that everyone's values are different, and one shouldn't care what others do, or choose to be offended by it. We should all be as enlightened, and indifferent to these things as you are.

Hector Remarkable		2012-02-22 09:56:57 AM

HotWingConspiracy		2012-02-22 09:57:04 AM

She doesn't care. Know how I know? BECAUSE SHE'S DEAD

It's pretty tough to pick a side in this particular tribal cult dust up.

"Yes, we will convert their dead to our ranks!"

"Make them stop using their magic on us!"

This would be entertaining if it was a LARP thing, but these people believe this shiat.

HailRobonia		2012-02-22 09:58:58 AM

Researcher: Mormon's hope they last long enough to get some ancient cred and claim to have all these people as part of their FOTM descendant religion.

We should invoke the Stolen Valor Act.

Displayed 50 of 206 comments