hes homeless but has a cellphone?

All boozed up, or completely off his rocker?

We report, you speculate.

Hudson.... Hmmm.... I'm guessing it's a Cold place to be homeless.
and a night in a cell, with coffee and a sandwich, can seem awfully nice on a cold night

cretinbob: "When a deputy arrived and found Barker, he was on the phone with 911 again saying he lost his football and was standing on his head on top of a telephone pole. When Barker spotted the deputy, he immediately hung up and covered his head in a blanket."

What's his Fark handle? I'm thinking alcohol was a factor.

Just looking at the mug shot will tell you that. When was the last time you saw a mug shot where the perp needed assistance from someone off camera?

He probably doesn't have a tv to watch Glee on, so what do you expect him to do for excitement?

Freakin Rican: hes homeless but has a cellphone?

There are a number of agencies that hand out free cell phones, without service, to homeless people so they can have access to 911.

"Barker was arrested for misuse of 911 and taken to Land O'Lakes Jail without incident."

Like butter...

Homeless? Get arrested. If you don't have ID and don't say anything, you get 3 hots and a cot until you tell the cops who you are.

Sure, it's still prison, but in a pinch, it might have to do.

What I'm confused by is that the officer didn't respond to him in the most obvious way:

Alright Mr. Barker, 'you're a taxi.'

I got an information operator in trouble with the cops one time because I was really farked up and needed the phone number to the local taxi company. I only had enough change on me to make the call to the taxi company and the info babe refused to give me the info without depositing a quarter into the phone. She got mad at me when I kept calling back and called the cops. The Cops realized I was drunk and biatched her out for not giving me the number and she sheepishly gave it to me.

Happens all the time in NYC. A buddy of mine is a medic in Brooklyn. He says most of his nights on the job in brooklyn is spent picking up skells. They call in with "chest pain / trouble breathing" (key words: they can't ignore you with those symptoms) and get a free ride to a warm bed and a hot meal in the hospital.

/like melted buttah

FTA: When Barker spotted the deputy, he immediately hung up and covered his head in a blanket.

Because if you can't see them then they can't see you.

Zombalupagus: FTA: When Barker spotted the deputy, he immediately hung up and covered his head in a blanket.

Because if you can't see them then they can't see you.

The Ravenous Bugbladder Beast of Traal approves.