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Kim Jong UnDead, another Italian jumps off a sinking ship, and men no longer offering Courtney Cox: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 2/5 - 2/11 
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-02-15 8:24:47 AM (12 comments) | Permalink

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3435 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Feb 2012 at 9:26 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Nothing new this week since most of my energy is on Vegas preparations, enjoy the headlines.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-02-05 to Sat 2012-02-11:

img.fark.net  The rate of STDs is skyrocketing among sexually active senior citizens. Keep that in mind the next time your Nana wants to give you a kiss    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Lost: One lightsaber stolen from Jedi in a Brooklyn bar known as a wretched hive of scum and villainy. Suspect is bearded, may have the death sentence on twelve systems    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Karen Handel resigns from Komen for the Cure to spend more time making decisions for your family    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Canada now officially endorses torture. This is neither a Celine Dion nor Nickelback joke    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Animal slavery trial of PETA against Sea World begins. Shamu reportedly hires a real shark for a lawyer    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  I-N-T-E-S-T-I-N-A-L I-L-L-N-E-S-S breaks out at cheerleading tournament    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Shyness and grieving will soon be classified as mental illnesses. In other news, pharmaceutical companies will soon have nice new drugs available to help cure you of your newly classified illnesses    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Fan of British sitcom "Red Dwarf" escapes Philadelphia Police custody. Last seen wearing handcuffs and green jumpsuit. Answers to "Smeghead"    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  IRS updates their smartphone app. Will now check your tax return and immediately tell how much jail time you can realistically expect to serve    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Pot smoking drivers 'twice as likely to cause car crash'. Really really slow car crashes    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Kim Jong Un Dead. I repeat - Un Dead    img.fark.net


Sports:

img.fark.net  Fabio Capello resigns as England soccer coach. Who would have thought an Italian would leave a sinking ship?    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Kevin Youkilis engaged to Tom Brady's sister. Still unclear how New York will ruin this for New England fans, too    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Olympics-bound female Afghani athlete doesn't play team sports, but you should see her box    img.fark.net


Geek:

img.fark.net  Is Facebook addictive? Of course not. That's just stupid... being addicted to a website. Like that could ever happen. Now, I have to go refresh TotalFARK a dozen times per minute to see if my latest submission was greenlit    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Doctors say erectile dysfunction may be a warning -- just one that doesn't stand out    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Researchers develop way to scan liquids that may allow travelers to carry on enough vodka to relieve the stress of the TSA screening, Southwest boarding process    img.fark.net


Entertainment:

img.fark.net  Men have not been offering Courteney Cox    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Fire destroys "Gone with the Wind" items. This is a repeat    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Whitney Houston beats Bobby Brown to death  


Politics:

img.fark.net  In Nevada victory speech, Romney says his mission is to "save the soul of America" - presumably by letting America die and then retroactively baptising it    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Arizona court forces potential candidate off of city council ballot because her English isn't good enough, setting a dangerous precedent that may leave the entirety of the south ungoverned    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Wingnuts: we don't need a protocol droid. Romney: Sir, I've also been programmed for over thirty secondary functions. Wingnuts: What we really need is a droid that understands wharrgarbl. Romney: It's like a second language for me    img.fark.net


Business:

img.fark.net  Credit Suisse reports firste losse in three yearse    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  $5.2b Tappan Zee project gets bids from four qualified contractors, who will keep the $7.1 billion project within its $8.9 billion budget in five years, at which point the $13 billion bridge will cost an estimated $19.6 billion    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Whitman founder accused of using insider information. Hey, someone's gotta know where the coconut candies are    img.fark.net
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(view entire blog)


12 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2012-02-15 09:29:56 AM
I like the Arizona spanglish candidate one
 
2012-02-15 09:36:17 AM
The Whitney Houston one was ripped off from the NY Post, so I give it a DQ.

The Olympic Afghani woman is the one I think is great.
 
2012-02-15 09:39:21 AM
No pastor's daughter holier than thou?
 
2012-02-15 09:40:24 AM
Protocol droid headline is a strong candidate for the HOTY contest when it comes around.
 
2012-02-15 09:47:14 AM
Wasn't Whitney Houston rumored to have been found dead in an embassy in Beijing?
 
2012-02-15 10:03:58 AM

Balchinian: The Whitney Houston one was ripped off from the NY Post, so I give it a DQ.
.


I feel like crap now. I came to remark that it was my favorite headline of the year, so far. Too bad it wasn't a Fark original. What's worse is that I have to give credit to the NY Post for doing something clever. Oh well, I guess it had to happen at least once in the 211 years it's been in business.
 
2012-02-15 10:11:51 AM

tillerman35: Balchinian: The Whitney Houston one was ripped off from the NY Post, so I give it a DQ.

I feel like crap now. I came to remark that it was my favorite headline of the year, so far. Too bad it wasn't a Fark original. What's worse is that I have to give credit to the NY Post for doing something clever. Oh well, I guess it had to happen at least once in the 211 years it's been in business.



Fark used the Ike/Tina headline for Ike's death, before that edition of the Post was published.
 
2012-02-15 10:29:57 AM

LockeOak: No pastor's daughter holier than thou?


That was on Monday, wasn't it?
 
2012-02-15 10:37:55 AM

SmackLT: LockeOak: No pastor's daughter holier than thou?

That was on Monday, wasn't it?


I think you're right. As usual, Fark is a few days behind.
 
2012-02-15 11:13:01 AM
No T-shirt available for the Whitney Houston headline?
 
2012-02-15 03:07:13 PM

Balchinian: The Olympic Afghani woman is the one I think is great.


Why thank you.
 
2012-02-17 08:54:38 PM

omegaminus: tillerman35: Balchinian: The Whitney Houston one was ripped off from the NY Post, so I give it a DQ.

I feel like crap now. I came to remark that it was my favorite headline of the year, so far. Too bad it wasn't a Fark original. What's worse is that I have to give credit to the NY Post for doing something clever. Oh well, I guess it had to happen at least once in the 211 years it's been in business.

Fark used the Ike/Tina headline for Ike's death, before that edition of the Post was published.


And my Whitney headline was attempting to give a new twist to an old joke.
 
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