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(MSN)   Caption this newly married couple's last few seconds on earth   ( divider line
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23569 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Feb 2012 at 6:53 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2012-02-14 12:30:03 PM  
I don't have to run faster than him, honey, I only need to run faster than you.
2012-02-14 12:30:34 PM  
"Yup. Should have eloped to Reno."
#2 [TotalFark]
2012-02-14 06:18:35 PM  
Who pooped on my "poop deck"?!?!
2012-02-14 06:59:12 PM  
...bright bere, onb by BUCKIN' HEAD!!!...
2012-02-14 06:59:45 PM  
2012-02-14 07:00:00 PM  
I invoke the right of Primae Noctis!
2012-02-14 07:00:44 PM  
Suddenly, the catchphrase, "Do you have a little captain in you?" took on a whole new meaning.
2012-02-14 07:01:11 PM  
Come back here, me bespectacled lass!
2012-02-14 07:02:19 PM  
I told you that your brother was drinking too damn much!
But did you listen to me? NO!
2012-02-14 07:03:04 PM  
We finally understand the meaning of "Til death do us part".

/apparently, down the middle
2012-02-14 07:07:27 PM  
Worst. Threesome. Ever.
2012-02-14 07:09:04 PM  
Arrrrrrr, I want her booty.
2012-02-14 07:09:09 PM  
"You had to give me a watch for a wedding gift, didn't you!"
2012-02-14 07:12:28 PM  
"You HAD to go for the cut-rate Somali honeymoon package, didn't you?"
2012-02-14 07:13:17 PM  
"I told you we we should have invited ninjas!"
2012-02-14 07:15:15 PM  
"Don't leave me here you bloody, sodding bugger!"
"Enjoy the rum, the lash...and what was that third thing dear?"
2012-02-14 07:17:07 PM  
Most Extreme Elimination Marriage contestants had to win in order to avoid the bride's impregnation by pirates.

(oops didn't enable voting)
2012-02-14 07:17:44 PM  
Captain Nobeard is a serious Santorum voter. Don't trifle with his cutlass. He will end these dyke weddings right here, right now.
2012-02-14 07:19:00 PM  
(Dyke? If there was a dyke we wouldn't have all this water!)
2012-02-14 07:19:13 PM  
I TOLD you global warming is real!
2012-02-14 07:22:22 PM  
Standing in a lake in North Thailand
Trying to get married in peace
The man in the hat said " can kiss the bride
If you escape from me in one piece!"

Christ you know it ain't easy
You know how pirates can be
If my bride doesn't get up
They're going to dismember me

/the Ballad of Sean and Yo-Ho
2012-02-14 07:24:26 PM  
"SCURVY SCUM! I TOLD you to wait 'til Speak Like A Pirate Day! YARRRRRRRRR!!!!"
2012-02-14 07:27:25 PM  
I said "plastics", like this sword.
2012-02-14 07:31:40 PM  
The wedding choices was either this or a Skyrim-themed wedding.
2012-02-14 07:38:11 PM  
Kevin and Dawn, February 2012

eHarmony, the #1 Trusted Relationship Site
2012-02-14 07:45:43 PM  
"Arrrrh. Do you not want to see my brass monkey balls?"
2012-02-14 07:49:16 PM  
Why is this guy chasing us?
Because he's after the Seventh Sigil, and he thinks we have it, hon.
But we don't have it.
Yeah, because you lost it.
Well, why the hell don't we just tell him that?
2012-02-14 07:55:08 PM  
Aaaarrrrrrrrghh! I'll ravish the bride n'I'll ravish thee grooommm!
More fun for Me! A pirate's life, we'll be havin'...

Weak finish, No?

Yea, I'd say so.
2012-02-14 07:55:12 PM  
That's right, ye fainthearted landlubbers! Not only can a ship's Captain marry people at sea, he can marry anybody he bloody well wants to! Now get back here and take your nuptuals on two feet, ye cowardly fornicators, or I'll keelhaul ye both and hang yer sorry corpses from the main-mast!
2012-02-14 07:58:39 PM  
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, and loot,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot,
Drink up me 'earties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We extort, we pilfer, we filch, and sack,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Maraud and embezzle, and even high-jack,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We kindle and char, inflame and ignite,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We burn up the city, we're really a fright,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.

We're rascals, scoundrels, villans, and knaves,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We're devils and black sheep, really bad eggs,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We're beggars and blighters, ne'er-do-well cads,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Aye, but we're loved by our mommies and dads,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
2012-02-14 08:06:55 PM  
ummm.... I don't mean to sound more racist than usual (which is, hopefully, never), but is the groom a transformer...? I'm totally cool with that, n all.......just thought a sexy Svedish boy would be a manly man and not wear a freakin' blouse....

is all....
too confused, going to sleep.
2012-02-14 08:08:15 PM  
Arrrrrrrr! Marriage is between a man and a woman, says I! Or possibly between a man and his parrot or monkey. Strange things happen at sea, Billy, my son!
2012-02-14 08:10:53 PM  
There'll be no global warming on my watch, by the Flying Spaghetti Monster's toasty brown balls!
2012-02-14 08:12:02 PM  
Arrrrrr! Ye've scuttled my dinghy, ye pants-wearing sissy wenches!
2012-02-14 08:13:10 PM  
Pirates be fun, no matter what your SpongeBob Square-rigging says! Party like it's 1699.
2012-02-14 08:14:24 PM  
"That beer looter be a bad influence and ye should feel bad for photoshopping him so much! Now come back here with me rum, dammit!"
2012-02-14 08:17:50 PM  
'Sorry baby, this isn't going to work. So I'm just going to punch you on your way down.'
2012-02-14 08:18:34 PM  
"What do you mean you don't know? I thought you knew the safeword"
2012-02-14 08:19:09 PM  
They tried to tell him it was not "International Talk Like A Pirate Day" but he was not going to listen to anything they had to say.
2012-02-14 08:28:07 PM  
The Mike Tyson kind of crazy, I could've dealt with, but not this.
2012-02-14 08:48:19 PM  
I said I wanted a date, not a pirate.
2012-02-14 08:58:43 PM  
I know, honey, you get down like a surfboard and I'll paddle us away!
2012-02-14 09:50:54 PM  
How dare she wear white? When the half of my crew that isn't flamin' ghey knows of 'er in a bodily way?
2012-02-14 09:54:15 PM  
Check ye agreement with ye city. As of four bells, this pavillion belongs to the Beckingdale United Teachings of Treacher's Pirate league.
2012-02-14 10:25:29 PM  
2012-02-15 01:08:34 AM  
There will be only one scabbard and only one sword! Do you understand?
2012-02-15 05:14:01 AM  
I told you entering a contest to win a bit part on "Pirates of the Caribbean 5" was a bad idea, but did you listen?

(now with voting enabled)
2012-02-15 05:52:02 AM  
You go now! You been here three hour!
2012-02-15 01:15:45 PM  
For Fark's sake! We're 2 minutes into this and ALREADY you're dragging me down!
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