Bono has fallen on hard times.

His nose is Crimson.

The arresting officer was heard to say: "enough of your borax, poindexter!"

I bet he will think twice before laundering that much money again.

$25k worth of Tide? Doesn't sound like he's working with a full load.

wanted for questioning: mr.clean

These types of crime usually occur in cycles.

I bet he was tracked down due to security cameras, fresh scent.

offmymeds: $25k worth of Tide? Doesn't sound like he's working with a full load.

Definitely unbalanced.

Puns aside. WHY? What possible need/use could you have for cartloads of Tide? Can you make drugs out of it?

I so hope Cops does a ride along when they go to search this man's house. It's gonna look like a cross between Hoarders and Extreme Couponing.

/Next on A&E "Kleptomaniac Wars"

Mentalpatient87: Puns aside. WHY? What possible need/use could you have for cartloads of Tide? Can you make drugs out of it?

He is the Prince of Tides?

Mentalpatient87: Puns aside. WHY? What possible need/use could you have for cartloads of Tide? Can you make drugs out of it?

He probably just has the necessary connections on the black market. Likely it's not the first time he's stolen large lots of retail goods for, uh...redistribution.

misterblaine63: I bet he was tracked down due to security cameras, fresh scent.

This would have been so much funnier if the repeat hadn't been removed...

He is just waiting for a real rain, so with the Tide, he can help clean the scum from the street.

culebra: Mentalpatient87: Puns aside. WHY? What possible need/use could you have for cartloads of Tide? Can you make drugs out of it?

He probably just has the necessary connections on the black market. Likely it's not the first time he's stolen large lots of retail goods for, uh...redistribution.

This. I used to work in retail in the Twin Cities where this happened in my teen years and people were always stealing huge amounts of laundry detergent and baby formula. Once during a smoke break I had a conversation with the off-duty cop who worked the door and he said these people usually sold the stuff to mom and pop stores in the inner city for about half what they would pay through legal channels. Mom and pop would then mark the stuff up higher than it cost retail at the suburban store it was stolen from and sell it to poor mothers who didn't care that it was so expensive because their government benefits covered it.

Enemabag Jones: He is just waiting for a real rain, so with the Tide, he can help clean the scum from the street.

Travis Bickle?

What a compassionate man. Helping the Eskimos and all.

MoeSzyslak: culebra: Mentalpatient87: Puns aside. WHY? What possible need/use could you have for cartloads of Tide? Can you make drugs out of it?

He probably just has the necessary connections on the black market. Likely it's not the first time he's stolen large lots of retail goods for, uh...redistribution.

This. I used to work in retail in the Twin Cities where this happened in my teen years and people were always stealing huge amounts of laundry detergent and baby formula. Once during a smoke break I had a conversation with the off-duty cop who worked the door and he said these people usually sold the stuff to mom and pop stores in the inner city for about half what they would pay through legal channels. Mom and pop would then mark the stuff up higher than it cost retail at the suburban store it was stolen from and sell it to poor mothers who didn't care that it was so expensive because their government benefits covered it.

Ahh, so he's an enterprising entrepreneur.

The manager started to smell something funny. He then realized it was low tide.

That's the face of a criminal genius alright.

/not the glasses though, those are ridiculous

bring to a festering boil: It's unclear what Patrick Paul Costanzo, 53, planned to do with all of the laundry soap.

With all that washing, there was probably some shrinkage.

Was that wrong? Should I not have done that? (new window)

Looks like his tide finally came in, pay the value back, month or two of jailtime and call it a wash. Wouldn't want people to think they're separating the colours and the whites for similar crimes.

time and tide wait for no man

Now that he's been caught, and the detergent confiscated, he's going to have a lot of trouble keeping his record spotless. No white collar crimes for him, I guess.

misterblaine63: I bet he was tracked down due to security cameras, fresh scent.

He might as well come clean.

Fine. You got me, Mr. Store Manager.

But this is one dedicated and satisfied customer you've lost forever.

I used to be easily agitated, then I got a front loader.

They busted a guy here for that over the summer. Found large amounts of detergent in his garage and $82,000 in cash. He would grab a shopping cart at a store load it up with detergent and walk out the door. He would sel it at swap meets and flea markets for 5 bucks less than retail.