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First official trailer for "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter". Abe is kicking ass and taking heads
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FormlessOne
2012-02-13 05:09:00 PM
"Honest Abe is electrifying!"
I can't wait to see the critic quips - especially from the boot-lickers.
And yes, I'm going to spend money to see it. I'll pay to see films like this made, instead of the latest installment of sparkly Mormon-fantasy vampires.
carrion_luggage
2012-02-13 05:17:11 PM
Poster idea: Abe wearing ear necklace of slaughtered vampires
Tagline: FOUR SCORE AND SEVEN EARS AGO
don't understand
2012-02-13 05:22:22 PM
The American movie experience: see shiat get blowed up real good.
Kendoway
2012-02-13 05:23:20 PM
Um, no.
RoyBatty
2012-02-13 05:34:22 PM
This may actually be a 3D movie that needs 3D.
ModernPrimitive01
2012-02-13 05:35:00 PM
When I first heard about this I was pretty excited. It seemed like a cool idea, period piece, throw in some history with some old school vampire killing with stakes and crossbows. The trailer looks just awful. It looks like some terrible mix of vampires and martial arts with every action cliche thrown in. I want Abe keeping the union together while being as tough as nails. I don't want giant explosions on a roller coaster (I think that's what that was) and slow motion guide wire spins. I don't want to see 300 with vampires, I want to see True Grit with vampires.
Nels
2012-02-13 05:48:39 PM
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Barricaded Gunman
2012-02-13 05:50:25 PM
Am I the only one wishing Tim Burton wasn't attached to this film?
Trackball
2012-02-13 05:55:00 PM
OK, you biatches gripe and moan that Hollywood does nothing but reboots and remakes and then you complain about this too.
Biatches....
farkingismybusiness
2012-02-13 05:59:59 PM
I hope it's historically accurate.
Whatthefark
2012-02-13 06:00:55 PM
Abraham Lincoln? Teddy Roosevelt should be the Vampire Hunter.
I heard he once killed a crocodile with nothing but his bare hands, BBQ'd it and ate it all to himself.
FormlessOne
2012-02-13 06:03:21 PM
Trackball
:
OK, you biatches gripe and moan that Hollywood does nothing but reboots and remakes and then you complain about this too.
Biatches....
My point exactly. This is still better than "Avatar 2: Flight Of The Na'vi Gator", or "Twilight: Breaking Wind, Part 2 - Mormon Mommy Monster", or "Transformers: Blow Up Stuff In Slo-Mo", or "The Middle-Aged Teenager With Michael Cera And Jonah Hill", or... well, just about anything else right now.
Monkeyfark Ridiculous
2012-02-13 06:03:34 PM
Regardless of how good or bad this movie is, it should be entertaining to see Abe axewhupping some sparkly Twilight douchebags in the inevitable mashup video.
stonelotus
2012-02-13 06:08:28 PM
FormlessOne
:
Trackball: OK, you biatches gripe and moan that Hollywood does nothing but reboots and remakes and then you complain about this too.
Biatches....
My point exactly. This is still better than "Avatar 2: Flight Of The Na'vi Gator", or "Twilight: Breaking Wind, Part 2 - Mormon Mommy Monster", or "Transformers: Blow Up Stuff In Slo-Mo", or "The Middle-Aged Teenager With Michael Cera And Jonah Hill", or... well, just about anything else right now.
I'm holding out for Adam Sandler doing a blackface movie.
toddalmighty
2012-02-13 06:13:38 PM
With regards to the trailer...the Washington Monument wasn't completed until 1884.
AaronSynn
2012-02-13 06:18:49 PM
You know, this looks cool and I want to see it....
But theres a little part of me that finds it slightly distasteful...Like they shouldn't make light of a great man by turning his story into something goofy....(but cool)
britgent
2012-02-13 06:23:06 PM
I get a real Jonah Hex feeling about this.
suziequzie
2012-02-13 06:29:49 PM
Summer? Oh, I am SO going to see this at the drive in here if they have it. This is perfect for the drive in.
Gunther
2012-02-13 06:31:28 PM
toddalmighty
:
With regards to the trailer...the Washington Monument wasn't completed until 1884.
Fortunately, that's the only historical inaccuracy in the film. Everything else happened EXACTLY as depicted.
/why is this being directed by some Russian dude?
//would they let an american direct Joseph Stalin: Ninja Exterminator?
funkyeuph
2012-02-13 06:43:01 PM
toddalmighty
:
With regards to the trailer...the Washington Monument wasn't completed until 1884.
The book was told as a character in present day recalling Abe Lincoln's life, so that could be modern DC. Still, I agree with most of these guys. The book was dark and brutal. This looks all flashy and Michael Bay inspired. I'm not excited any more.
RatMaster999
2012-02-13 06:44:47 PM
Whatthefark
:
Abraham Lincoln? Teddy Roosevelt should be the Vampire Hunter.
I heard he once killed a crocodile with nothing but his bare hands, BBQ'd it and ate it all to himself.
Nah, he needs tougher prey.
Teddy Roosevelt: Werewolf Hunter.
Dimensio
2012-02-13 06:48:20 PM
Whatthefark
:
Abraham Lincoln? Teddy Roosevelt should be the Vampire Hunter.
I heard he once killed a crocodile with nothing but his bare hands, BBQ'd it and ate it all to himself.
President Theodore Roosevelt hunted werewolves, not vampires.
9beers
2012-02-13 07:07:47 PM
FormlessOne
:
I can't wait to see the critic quips - especially from the boot-lickers.
WTF does that even mean?
SilentStrider
2012-02-13 07:10:30 PM
this looks intriguing.
Crocoduck
2012-02-13 07:11:30 PM
Whatever happened to that 'Abe and The Babe' project that was floating around Hollywood?
sanktp
2012-02-13 07:16:52 PM
The part should have gone to Henry, though. He totally sold out to get it.
Are we having fun yet?
(new window)
9beers
2012-02-13 07:18:16 PM
So what's the deal with chopping down the tree with one swing of the axe? Is he super strong or is it a magic axe or something?
AUAIOMRN
2012-02-13 07:23:25 PM
Trackball
:
OK, you biatches gripe and moan that Hollywood does nothing but reboots and remakes and then you complain about this too.
Biatches....
I think the complaint would be that this is your generic Hollywood action movie with a slightly different coating. I mean it did look a lot more "serious" than I was expecting. I'm not familiar with the book though, so hopefully it turns out well.
mekki
2012-02-13 07:31:13 PM
AaronSynn
:
You know, this looks cool and I want to see it....
But theres a little part of me that finds it slightly distasteful...Like they shouldn't make light of a great man by turning his story into something goofy....(but cool)
The US doesn't do sacred cows. Besides it's not the first time they have done something silly with Lincoln. Or the thousandth time. The man, for some reason, is ripe for alternative universe fiction and parody
/PARTY ON, DUDES!
//Girl, I wanna take you to a gay bar, a gay bar, A GAY BAR!
Monkeyfark Ridiculous
2012-02-13 07:35:44 PM
9beers
:
So what's the deal with chopping down the tree with one swing of the axe? Is he super strong or is it a magic axe or something?
He was super strong.
(new window)
SilentStrider
2012-02-13 07:36:10 PM
AaronSynn
:
But theres a little part of me that finds it slightly distasteful...Like they shouldn't make light of a great man by turning his story into something goofy....(but cool)
you want serious treatment of Lincoln, go watch the biopic starring Daniel Day Lewis. You want action movie, see this.
Or be weird like me and want to see both.
Mr. Potatoass
2012-02-13 07:39:55 PM
9beers
:
So what's the deal with chopping down the tree with one swing of the axe? Is he super strong or is it a magic axe or something?
Dutch Elm disease.
sanktp
2012-02-13 07:40:59 PM
ATHFs time travelling Lincoln
(new window) is also pretty cool.
mikefinch
2012-02-13 07:43:58 PM
Is any of it not CGI?
browntimmy
2012-02-13 08:00:27 PM
From the title I was expecting a low-budget tongue-in-cheek horror-comedy.
This trailer is advertising it like we're supposed to take it seriously. No thanks, try again.
Bathia_Mapes
2012-02-13 08:14:17 PM
Barricaded Gunman
:
Am I the only one wishing Tim Burton wasn't attached to this film?
He one of the movie's producers, not the director. The director is Timur Bekmambetov (director of Night Watch & Day Watch).
Bathia_Mapes
2012-02-13 08:16:13 PM
Gunther
:
toddalmighty: With regards to the trailer...the Washington Monument wasn't completed until 1884.
Fortunately, that's the only historical inaccuracy in the film. Everything else happened EXACTLY as depicted.
/why is this being directed by some Russian dude?
//would they let an american direct Joseph Stalin: Ninja Exterminator?
Maybe because Timur Bekmambetov has already directed a couple of decent vampire movies, "Night Watch" & "Day Watch".
jeanwearinfool
2012-02-13 08:25:11 PM
So this is the movie Daniel Day Lewis is doing? Cool!
Bathia_Mapes
2012-02-13 08:46:40 PM
jeanwearinfool
:
So this is the movie Daniel Day Lewis is doing? Cool!
Uh, no.
propasaurus
2012-02-13 09:05:05 PM
mikefinch
:
Is any of it not CGI?
Lincoln's beard.
jeanwearinfool
2012-02-13 09:07:20 PM
Bathia_Mapes
:
jeanwearinfool: So this is the movie Daniel Day Lewis is doing? Cool!
Uh, no.
I kid, I kid.
Snuffybud
2012-02-13 09:18:13 PM
mekki
:
AaronSynn: You know, this looks cool and I want to see it....
But theres a little part of me that finds it slightly distasteful...Like they shouldn't make light of a great man by turning his story into something goofy....(but cool)
The US doesn't do sacred cows. Besides it's not the first time they have done something silly with Lincoln. Or the thousandth time. The man, for some reason, is ripe for alternative universe fiction and parody
Abe is totally sacred, nobody has ever used him out of context......
/hot hot hot
nocturn
2012-02-13 09:19:00 PM
That looks fun, I'm in.
DeadMouseTails
2012-02-13 09:33:45 PM
I really enjoyed the book. This looks like it could be fun. I'll see it.
Hector Remarkable
2012-02-13 09:43:13 PM
I hope it's better than Chester A. Arthur vs.The Mummy or Millard Fillmore Meets Frankenstein. Those were terrible.
Sun Worshiping Dog Launcher
2012-02-13 09:43:58 PM
AaronSynn
:
You know, this looks cool and I want to see it....
But theres a little part of me that finds it slightly distasteful...Like they shouldn't make light of a great man by turning his story into something goofy....(but cool)
Well, it wouldn't exactly have the same ring to it if it was say, Franklin Pierce. Then again, the narrative could have a bit more wiggle-room since no one has any idea who or what Franklin Pierce was. You could have him fighting zombie aliens on the moon and romancing Victorian-era hermaphrodite werewolves in the Sahara, and no one is going to give a damn.
berniex
2012-02-13 09:48:33 PM
"Hasta la vista, Abie"
Mugato
2012-02-13 09:53:29 PM
I have no problem with the wacky concept but slow mo-stop-fast-mo-stop-slow-mo-wire fu? Really? Is it 1999 already? Neo's gonna sue a biatch.
buckler
2012-02-13 09:55:50 PM
Bathia_Mapes
:
Barricaded Gunman: Am I the only one wishing Tim Burton wasn't attached to this film?
He one of the movie's producers, not the director. The director is Timur Bekmambetov (director of Night Watch & Day Watch).
I only saw the first one, but that was a lot of fun. Makes me want to watch this one more.
the_second_inmate
2012-02-13 09:58:44 PM
Whatthefark
:
Abraham Lincoln? Teddy Roosevelt should be the Vampire Hunter.
I heard he once killed a crocodile with nothing but his bare hands, BBQ'd it and ate it all to himself.
It's supposed to be fiction, not a documentary.
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